So I got an e-mail from the University of Minnesota -- I keep in touch with their Continuing Studies program, just in case I finally get the balls to go back to school. It's this thing the college refers to as something like Big Data Boot Camp. And I became instantly intrigued.
Big Data, aka data analytics aka data science, etc., is a big field, a burgeoning field, and a field that may be inoculated against automation. It is a field I have thought about entering in an abstract, how-do-I-look-if-I-try-this-on kind of way. One of the main uses I can get from this boot camp, which I think teaches you programming and data mining, is the flexibility with which what you learn can be applied to great, forward-looking jobs. In particular (and kudos to the marketing department for thinking of this), doing this six-month intensive program is a part of being a data journalist. And golly, I could go back to making my degree worth something.
I am very, very content with my work situation now, screwing up on the job notwithstanding. I like my job partly because I don't (and actually can't) take work home with me, but I don't know if I can just stay there the rest of my life. Plus, I would like to make more money. Finally, the marketing e-mail just said that if I were interested, contact this recruiter for more information. That does not seem like a commitment, so I first filled out a webpage and, after getting a few e-mails back, finally scheduled an appointment for a call with this recruiter.
So I took this call after work yesterday, out in the park, in the middle of a howling wind, while eating two items (the Mexican Pizza and a Shredded Chicken Quesadilla Melt) Taco Bell will be removing from their menu permanently in three weeks. It was part interview -- "Why are you interested in our program?" -- and part passive-aggressive interrogation, by which I mean the recruiter (and by no means I am fooled into thinking this guy, or this program, has much to do with the U.; I did some quick research just now and the U. is mostly a cover for this company to make money, from which the U. probably gets a cut in exchange for this company to slap the U.'s name on the certificate each person gets after completing this program) asked me basic questions for the Boot Camp. One question I could definitely answer affirmatively: "Do you have a laptop?" One question, "Can you devote 30 hours a week for this program, in both online classes and homework?" I answered yes to but, deep down, gives me pause. And one other question -- "Can you pay 11 grand?" -- I think I answered with, "Sure!" Sure is not yes, and I hope he knows what I meant by that.
But I answered the way he wanted me to answer, so the phone call, which was supposed to go 30 minutes, was about to wrap in less than 20. However, he confirmed my e-mail address because he was going to send me a link to a test that I had to do. A test??? You mean, like, homework? And then he is going to follow up with the results of the test the next day, meaning today. Fuck, man, I have the day off. And speaking of fuck, I planned on spending the day fucking ****e's brains out. And now I have to spend my Thursday evening worrying about getting 30 questions right (and in 30 minutes -- it was timed, and the recruiter probably said that over the phone, but I didn't hear it because the wind ruined the reception of the call) in order to even be accepted to this program?
Well, maybe I overreacted. First of all, I took a dirt nap between 7 and 10 this evening, so I was all woken up. I took a shower and took this test naked with wet hair. And, oh, the recruiter did say that this quiz was open-book. In fact, the instructions before I took the test encouraged me to open up another browser window to look up answers. After looking up the first question I needed to look up, I could see by the automated fill-in suggestions on Google that I definitely was not the first person to apply for Big Data Boot Camp.
So, to be honest, it was a lot less harder than I thought. I got through the 30 questions in 13 minutes. The recruiter said I needed 70% to pass, and even though I probably wasn't perfect, my Google skills are on point, so I think I cleared that threshold. (Shit, man, they'd probably accept me if I didn't reach 70% because the company he works for needs as much tuition money they can get.) I just found it a tad annoying I had to take a friggin' quiz when my weekend has already started. Oh, and I still have a "visit from a professor" tomorrow, and I don't know if the time I gave him is a good time. I mean, I could still be fucking ****e's brains out when he calls.
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