Whenever I go on a spending binge, I avoid looking at the balance of my checking account because I'm scared of how much I've actually spent and how much I actually have left. In other words, I nearly always avoid checking my checking account.
But I usually come around to it whenever I sense that I'm getting really, really low. Such was the case during my two-week "furlough" inbetween jobs last month. I don't know how it happened -- that's always my excuse -- but it felt as though I had spent an inordinate amount of money over the summer, and so my unemployment, just around the time my credit card bill was due, came at an extremely inopportune time. And sure enough, when I looked, I saw that I was hovering just above two grand -- my self-imposed Mendoza line between solvency and ... well, I don't know how my left would change if I fell below that.
Well, it's gotten worse. My only significant change to seeing my bankroll that low is to charge everything until I started getting paychecks at my new job. But that hasn't stopped my spending. And something else bad has creeped up on me: I have realized that being paid bi-weekly, instead of weekly as I always have been at my temp jobs (and why is that?) really, really sucks. Twice the money is nice, but not if I have to wait every other week to get them. The wait is interminable, and I believe that at least for this cycle and possibly for the next, my paycheck won't come in time for me to use it to pay my credit card bill.
So the reckoning has come. Some time this past week I checked my checking account and I am below two grand. On top of that, I actually did some shuffling around with my money. I actually took $500 out of my PayPal and put it back into my personal account in order to fatten it up and, frankly, to make myself feel better. Confession: I don't know if all the money I took out of my PayPal is technically mine.
It really didn't matter. I am below my Mendoza line after I stuffed it with my PayPal money. Which means that however fallow my account is right now, it actually is $500 dollars worse. In other words, I have -- gulp ... close to a grand to my name. Really, it's just a thousand bucks.
I don't know where the money went. And I have to be honest with myself: If I really cared, I'd stop spending money. But hey, my parents are away, the State Fair is here, and I need to get a blowjob from someone I haven't seen in months, so I ain't stoppin'.
The only thing I can promise myself is to pay my bills. Whenever my paycheck comes, I know it'll immediately go back out to pay my credit card bills. After that I need to replenish (somewhat) my PayPal account, then if there's money left over, I might give some to the alumni club. And that means I will be ... back to where I am, money-wise.
Good bleepin' Lord, where did all my money go?!
Saturday, August 25, 2018
Friday, August 24, 2018
Addendum To: Tirangry (Scheduled Post)
Went to the State Fair at its opener last night. And even though it was beautiful -- the babe talent was on-point! -- I just got ... tired and angry after a while. I got tirangry again, and it consumed me so much that for a while there I kind of forgot where I was going.
I went to the fair after stopping off at the post office to deliver a package to my folks. They wanted me to send this package, and they insisted I use USPS instead of FedEx or UPS. I realized that even though this was a relative mild argument, them disagreeing with me has been a main characteristic of my relationship with them. I then realized that much of the time, I feel worse about myself after I talk to them. Seems obvious now, but I hadn't been able to put it into such elegant terms until now.
Anyway, I did a lot of walking and a lot of thinking and soon I just spaced out. The beer, a great Black Currant-flavored cider from Sociable, got me fatigued real quick, but I still had a fair to walk through and food I wanted to eat. And then these thoughts came back to me ... of my family letting me down ... of getting cold-cocked in the face ... of people apologizing to me for screwing me over and me lashing out at them as revenge ... of me hitting somebody, and actually connecting, and actually hurting them. I was consumed by all those thoughts in the, oh, back half of the Fair, even though I had a great time, or at least I thought I did.
You know, maybe sleep is what I need. Should end this blog post now.
I went to the fair after stopping off at the post office to deliver a package to my folks. They wanted me to send this package, and they insisted I use USPS instead of FedEx or UPS. I realized that even though this was a relative mild argument, them disagreeing with me has been a main characteristic of my relationship with them. I then realized that much of the time, I feel worse about myself after I talk to them. Seems obvious now, but I hadn't been able to put it into such elegant terms until now.
Anyway, I did a lot of walking and a lot of thinking and soon I just spaced out. The beer, a great Black Currant-flavored cider from Sociable, got me fatigued real quick, but I still had a fair to walk through and food I wanted to eat. And then these thoughts came back to me ... of my family letting me down ... of getting cold-cocked in the face ... of people apologizing to me for screwing me over and me lashing out at them as revenge ... of me hitting somebody, and actually connecting, and actually hurting them. I was consumed by all those thoughts in the, oh, back half of the Fair, even though I had a great time, or at least I thought I did.
You know, maybe sleep is what I need. Should end this blog post now.
Thursday, August 23, 2018
This Benefits Sign-Up Is Really Hard!
I have a week to go to enroll, and I thought tonight would be the night that I would finally grow up, be a man, and do it. But I've just tried to go through it all and it's intimidating as hell.
I knew of one question I couldn't fully answer: What type of health insurance should I get? But as I went through enrollment online I had other ones that I didn't even think of but should have. Questions like:
But right now I have six days, so maybe I'll hang tight.
I knew of one question I couldn't fully answer: What type of health insurance should I get? But as I went through enrollment online I had other ones that I didn't even think of but should have. Questions like:
- What dental plan should I get?
- Should I get a vision plan?
- How about life insurance? Damned if I know!
- Do I want to buy into legal assistance? Legal assistance?!
But right now I have six days, so maybe I'll hang tight.
Wednesday, August 22, 2018
The First False Note At Work
I didn't need to hear what my supervisor said at the end of work yesterday. In fact, it's fair to say he blindsided me. First time at this job; guess that means the honeymoon is over.
We're finishing up. I'm noticing these days that we finish up our work before my eight hours, and so I need to find something to do. There is a task that the other full-timers are doing, but I haven't been trained on that, and I still haven't. (If not getting trained on this task continues and/or worsens into a big problem, I'll blog about it here later.)
Instead, there is a training module I need to get through, so I figure that I can while away the minutes doing that. I put my headphones on to listen to the module when I hear my supervisor calling out my name. He's telling me I can leave early. He's said that on several occasions since I started work, but since I'm working hourly, leaving early means that I don't get paid, so fuck that, I'm doing training. And this motherfucker thinks I don't get it, so he says, "Man, we're trying to tell you that I don't want you here!"
Excuse me, asshole?!
See, this is where the angry part of me (or, in other words, I) would lash out at him. But I knew he was joking. Or is he? Man, I can't tell. Anyway, that fucking rubs me the wrong way. I don't give a shit if he says it in jest; I don't want to be told I'm not wanted. And I sure as hell won't leave early and give up money I need for hours I was promised I would work.
I told him I was doing training, so he left me alone and I got to stay until I was supposed to leave. But man, just ... goddamn, I hate that he said that. It really fuckin' bothers me. And now I wonder if there is more passive-aggressive bullshit that will emanate from his mouth in the weeks to come.
We're finishing up. I'm noticing these days that we finish up our work before my eight hours, and so I need to find something to do. There is a task that the other full-timers are doing, but I haven't been trained on that, and I still haven't. (If not getting trained on this task continues and/or worsens into a big problem, I'll blog about it here later.)
Instead, there is a training module I need to get through, so I figure that I can while away the minutes doing that. I put my headphones on to listen to the module when I hear my supervisor calling out my name. He's telling me I can leave early. He's said that on several occasions since I started work, but since I'm working hourly, leaving early means that I don't get paid, so fuck that, I'm doing training. And this motherfucker thinks I don't get it, so he says, "Man, we're trying to tell you that I don't want you here!"
Excuse me, asshole?!
See, this is where the angry part of me (or, in other words, I) would lash out at him. But I knew he was joking. Or is he? Man, I can't tell. Anyway, that fucking rubs me the wrong way. I don't give a shit if he says it in jest; I don't want to be told I'm not wanted. And I sure as hell won't leave early and give up money I need for hours I was promised I would work.
I told him I was doing training, so he left me alone and I got to stay until I was supposed to leave. But man, just ... goddamn, I hate that he said that. It really fuckin' bothers me. And now I wonder if there is more passive-aggressive bullshit that will emanate from his mouth in the weeks to come.
Tuesday, August 21, 2018
Yesterday's Milestones
Yesterday, Monday, I showered for the first time since last Tuesday, so ... six days.
Also, I had set out not to set one foot outside yesterday/Monday, not even to get the mail. Mission accomplished. It feels good not to spend one dollar, or add one mile to my car. I'll get yesterday's mail on my way out to work in a bit.
Just for the record.
Also, I had set out not to set one foot outside yesterday/Monday, not even to get the mail. Mission accomplished. It feels good not to spend one dollar, or add one mile to my car. I'll get yesterday's mail on my way out to work in a bit.
Just for the record.
Monday, August 20, 2018
Addendum To: Side Cramps
They are continuing. In fact, they are more pronounced today. Stabbing pain in my right kidney.
Just an FYI.
Just an FYI.
The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey
Positive Numbers: Gopher soccer (Re-Entry!). As a side that missed the NCAA Tournament last year and is slated to finish sixth in the Big Ten this year, they need to bone up on their non-conference schedule to buttress any chance of getting into the postseason this year. And through the first weekend of the women's college soccer (and college sports) year, they have started off well. On Friday, Freshman Patricia Ward (with Assists from Makenzie Langdok and stalwart April Bockin), scored the only Goal in their win over Utah in Salt Lake City in the 90th Minute. (Technically, at least according to the box score on the Gophers sports' website, Ward scored with 11 seconds to go in regulation. I like that American college soccer marks time down to the second. It's way more precise than regular soccer convention.) Then yesterday (Sunday) afternoon, Maddie Castro (in the 69th) and McKenna Buisman (77') scored to bring Minnesota back from a Halftime deficit and defeat Utah St. in Logan, Utah, 2-1.
Maybe these players can make some noise? They certainly will be able to do that on an advantage, for they begin an eight-match homestand with weekend tilts versus Ole Miss Friday and Washington St. Sunday, both of which are a part of a quasi-tournament, only quasi- because Iowa will play the Cougars Friday afternoon but won't play the Rebels Sunday. The Hawkeyes will go home to Iowa City and play Indiana St. Sunday instead. Weird.
#-1: Twins (Last Week: -2). Holy crap -- the Twins won five-of-six this screening week! I was there Thursday for probably their most convincing victory of the week, where they clubbed the Detroit Tigers to the tune of 15-8. The Starting Pitchers are notable in that game. Guess who started for the Tigs -- Francisco Liriano! And the former Twin didn't even get through the Second Inning! (Tigers Manager Ron Gardenhire burned through seven Pitchers in the game!) Meanwhile, Twins starter Ervin Santana didn't fare much better. He was pulled in the Fifth after loading the bases. He didn't last long enough to automatically get credit for the win. Trevor May, who replaced Santana, started off extremely shaky, allowing two Runs with Walks, but he got out of the inning with the lead (even though it shrank from three to one). Minnesota plated seven Runs off two Tigers Pitchers in the Bottom of the Sixth; May was replaced by Addison Reed in the subsequent half-Inning, and even though he pitched in two fewer Innings than Santana, May was given the win, his first of the season, instead of Santana.
The only blemish this week was a comeback that came up short in Saturday's 7-5 loss to Detroit. Still, the series win over the Tigers, plus a two-game sweep of the Pittsburgh Pirates mid-week, is impressive. And if the Twins had any chance of making the postseason, I and everyone else would care a whole lot more!
This week: They start off playing a three-game series against the White Sox, but this series is weird. Tonight's (Monday night's) game is at Target Field, the last of a seven-game homestand, as a make-up for the snowed-out contest on Tax Day. The two teams will then fly to the South Side to play a pair Tuesday and Wednesday at Comiskey. The Twinks will then fly back here for a four-game set vs. an organization the Twins would do well to emulate, the Oakland Athletics, who, despite a chronically small payroll and a really shithole of a stadium, not only regularly compete but are now battling the Houston Astros for first place in the American League Western Division.
#-2: United FC (Last Week: -1). No Francisco Calvo (double yellow suspension), no Collen Warner (Yellow Card accumulation suspension), no Darwin Quintero (???) ... but lots of rain Saturday for the Loons' match against the Dallas Burn. In fact, the storm coming through the Metroplex was so bad that the game was delayed for 154 minutes.
They might as well have called the game off. They didn't, but once they did, MNUFC wished they would have. These boys were shit, and FC Dallas convincingly beat them 2-0, the first Goal of which was started off when a deflection off Michael Boxall's head neutralized an offside call.
Meanwhile, on Wednesday with LAFC, Christian Ramirez did this:
But we didn't need him.
This shit is never not going to be funny.
The Roadtrip Where They Pound Nails Into Their Own Coffins continues Saturday when they visit the Kansas City Wiz(ards).
Maybe these players can make some noise? They certainly will be able to do that on an advantage, for they begin an eight-match homestand with weekend tilts versus Ole Miss Friday and Washington St. Sunday, both of which are a part of a quasi-tournament, only quasi- because Iowa will play the Cougars Friday afternoon but won't play the Rebels Sunday. The Hawkeyes will go home to Iowa City and play Indiana St. Sunday instead. Weird.
#-1: Twins (Last Week: -2). Holy crap -- the Twins won five-of-six this screening week! I was there Thursday for probably their most convincing victory of the week, where they clubbed the Detroit Tigers to the tune of 15-8. The Starting Pitchers are notable in that game. Guess who started for the Tigs -- Francisco Liriano! And the former Twin didn't even get through the Second Inning! (Tigers Manager Ron Gardenhire burned through seven Pitchers in the game!) Meanwhile, Twins starter Ervin Santana didn't fare much better. He was pulled in the Fifth after loading the bases. He didn't last long enough to automatically get credit for the win. Trevor May, who replaced Santana, started off extremely shaky, allowing two Runs with Walks, but he got out of the inning with the lead (even though it shrank from three to one). Minnesota plated seven Runs off two Tigers Pitchers in the Bottom of the Sixth; May was replaced by Addison Reed in the subsequent half-Inning, and even though he pitched in two fewer Innings than Santana, May was given the win, his first of the season, instead of Santana.
The only blemish this week was a comeback that came up short in Saturday's 7-5 loss to Detroit. Still, the series win over the Tigers, plus a two-game sweep of the Pittsburgh Pirates mid-week, is impressive. And if the Twins had any chance of making the postseason, I and everyone else would care a whole lot more!
This week: They start off playing a three-game series against the White Sox, but this series is weird. Tonight's (Monday night's) game is at Target Field, the last of a seven-game homestand, as a make-up for the snowed-out contest on Tax Day. The two teams will then fly to the South Side to play a pair Tuesday and Wednesday at Comiskey. The Twinks will then fly back here for a four-game set vs. an organization the Twins would do well to emulate, the Oakland Athletics, who, despite a chronically small payroll and a really shithole of a stadium, not only regularly compete but are now battling the Houston Astros for first place in the American League Western Division.
#-2: United FC (Last Week: -1). No Francisco Calvo (double yellow suspension), no Collen Warner (Yellow Card accumulation suspension), no Darwin Quintero (???) ... but lots of rain Saturday for the Loons' match against the Dallas Burn. In fact, the storm coming through the Metroplex was so bad that the game was delayed for 154 minutes.
They might as well have called the game off. They didn't, but once they did, MNUFC wished they would have. These boys were shit, and FC Dallas convincingly beat them 2-0, the first Goal of which was started off when a deflection off Michael Boxall's head neutralized an offside call.
Meanwhile, on Wednesday with LAFC, Christian Ramirez did this:
But we didn't need him.
This shit is never not going to be funny.
The Roadtrip Where They Pound Nails Into Their Own Coffins continues Saturday when they visit the Kansas City Wiz(ards).
Sunday, August 19, 2018
Yep, I Forgot (Scheduled Post)
I forgot to call in in time. Yeah, I though it would happen. Had passing thoughts of doing things to make sure it didn't happen, like putting in a reminder on my phone (something I have never done before) or setting an alarm. But those were indeed just passing thoughts.
You want excuses for why I didn't call in when I said I would? Oh, I can give you excuses! Never in my years of running for crews have I been this busy running virtually from the get-go. An hour into my workday -- which started at 6, by the way, and this is after waking up at 2 and failing to fall back asleep -- I was sent back up a second time to wait for crew members to come and get their credentials and parking passes. These are people, great people, who were scheduled to come in at 9 or 10 in the morning but instead wanted to come in earlier ... like 7:30. Also, I was totally flummoxed because this idiot told me to get out of the security line and walk all the way around the corner to a different gate -- even though I had already passed through the metal detector. Other members of the crew were following me through the gate and she stopped them, to which I told her, "But you let me through!" while holding my credential, which was around my neck. And I swear to God this dumbass, in her Nerdlinger voice, pulls down her glasses and goes, "Yeah, sorry, you have to go out and go around too." What a lazy fucking moron.
And finally I was sent out to get water. Going out to Target I saw 35WS closed. I didn't think that party of 35W would be closed, so I had to get on my phone and turn on my 3G to access Google Maps and Waze to figure out how to get back to the stadium at the time the guy I was working for wanted me to come back. It was in this alternate route where I looked at the time on the dashboard. I thought, "Hmmm, 8:20. I imagine the guys are just starting work ... HOLY SHIT, I FORGOT TO CALL MY BOSS!!! FUCK, FUCK, FUCK!!!"
I had to pull off to the nearest gas station to call her up. I apologized profusely for not calling sooner. Now I need to know how bad my mistake was. I was told to call in before my shift, which on Saturdays begin at 8. I have been led to believe that there is a difference between calling in sick before work and calling in sick during a shift. Like I said in my previous blog post, I am already in trouble for not showing up for a day I did not get approval for missing. The question now becomes whether I am in even deeper shit for not calling before my day starts. My boss said that she knew that I was working this day, and that this was arranged before I even applied for this job. But I have no idea if this even matters. This is already considered an "unexcused" absence; have I made it worse by not calling in time, like I promised I would?
Dammit, I'm already dreading Tuesday.
You want excuses for why I didn't call in when I said I would? Oh, I can give you excuses! Never in my years of running for crews have I been this busy running virtually from the get-go. An hour into my workday -- which started at 6, by the way, and this is after waking up at 2 and failing to fall back asleep -- I was sent back up a second time to wait for crew members to come and get their credentials and parking passes. These are people, great people, who were scheduled to come in at 9 or 10 in the morning but instead wanted to come in earlier ... like 7:30. Also, I was totally flummoxed because this idiot told me to get out of the security line and walk all the way around the corner to a different gate -- even though I had already passed through the metal detector. Other members of the crew were following me through the gate and she stopped them, to which I told her, "But you let me through!" while holding my credential, which was around my neck. And I swear to God this dumbass, in her Nerdlinger voice, pulls down her glasses and goes, "Yeah, sorry, you have to go out and go around too." What a lazy fucking moron.
And finally I was sent out to get water. Going out to Target I saw 35WS closed. I didn't think that party of 35W would be closed, so I had to get on my phone and turn on my 3G to access Google Maps and Waze to figure out how to get back to the stadium at the time the guy I was working for wanted me to come back. It was in this alternate route where I looked at the time on the dashboard. I thought, "Hmmm, 8:20. I imagine the guys are just starting work ... HOLY SHIT, I FORGOT TO CALL MY BOSS!!! FUCK, FUCK, FUCK!!!"
I had to pull off to the nearest gas station to call her up. I apologized profusely for not calling sooner. Now I need to know how bad my mistake was. I was told to call in before my shift, which on Saturdays begin at 8. I have been led to believe that there is a difference between calling in sick before work and calling in sick during a shift. Like I said in my previous blog post, I am already in trouble for not showing up for a day I did not get approval for missing. The question now becomes whether I am in even deeper shit for not calling before my day starts. My boss said that she knew that I was working this day, and that this was arranged before I even applied for this job. But I have no idea if this even matters. This is already considered an "unexcused" absence; have I made it worse by not calling in time, like I promised I would?
Dammit, I'm already dreading Tuesday.
Saturday, August 18, 2018
The Rigmarole
I am working this morning (actually in a few hours) for the Vikings game, even though I should be putting in my shift at my new job. I told my boss about this when he interviewed me over the phone, and he was OK with this.
Here's how the process was explained to me, however. This company has a set number of hours, or Paid Time Off (PTO, but most of you know that). This company is extremely generous with their PTO. In fact, even though I just started, I'm already using it for this weekend. However, as this is shift work, there are production goals to be met, and therefore a standard number of people who should be there.
As far as I can tell, they are OK if there are more people who beg for a day off. It's not like it's going to force everyone who does show up into an extra, like, four hours of overtime in order to get everything done in time. But they have only so many people they can approve PTO for each day. I was approved yesterday/Friday, but not today/Saturday because people have already been given permission to take the day off.
I told my boss this, and they're still OK with me taking today off. I just have to do one thing: I have to call just before my shift begins and tell my other boss that I'm calling in sick. That's all. I have to call in sick.
This raises a few questions. The first one is, do I call in sick, or do I ... "call in sick?" I have not told my other boss that I need to take today off for my other job. But both of my bosses share the same office, so I can't help but believe he has already told her. But has he? If so, do I have to fake it?
And that brings me to my second, and more important, question. If my boss knows about me missing Saturday, why do I have to call in this morning to say so? Don't they already know I have an unapproved absence coming up? Do I have to go through the ... rigmarole (I thought it was spelled "rigAmarole") of calling in if she already knows I'm not coming in? I asked my supervisor this on Thursday and he said, while shaking his head, that I had to.
Alright. Guess I have to. Feels unnecessary, but this is ultimately a point of bureaucracy I'll deal with. Now I just have to remember to bleeping do it. Because if not, I'll get into a heap of trouble.
Friday, August 17, 2018
Oh, This Is Gonna Go Swimmingly ...
So I'm working the Vikings game this weekend. For the first time ever, I'm working a preseason game. It'll be for the broadcast of the visiting Jaguars, so even though a lot of my tasks will be familiar, the people I'll be working for will not.
Because of that, I'm coming into this with my eyes open and my guard up. I don't know how things are going to work this weekend. And because of that, I want to iron out as many wrinkles as possible and soon as possible. And one of the very first things I need to settle is how I am going to get my pass -- the one thing that will allow me to go anywhere I need to go inside the stadium for the game. I cannot step foot inside the stadium without one. But how do I get it?
I have e-mailed the point person, the guy who got me this job, and he told me to sit tight. Well, I'm still sitting tight, because I haven't heard from him. So how the hell can I start my job tomorrow if I don't even know who to ask for my pass?
The only saving grace is that there are a lot of people coming in tomorrow at the same time as I. A few of them I think I might even remember, either from crewing Vikings regular season games or the Super Bowl earlier this year. We'll all be in the same boat, wondering just how in the hell are we supposed to do our jobs. Wish us luck.
Because of that, I'm coming into this with my eyes open and my guard up. I don't know how things are going to work this weekend. And because of that, I want to iron out as many wrinkles as possible and soon as possible. And one of the very first things I need to settle is how I am going to get my pass -- the one thing that will allow me to go anywhere I need to go inside the stadium for the game. I cannot step foot inside the stadium without one. But how do I get it?
I have e-mailed the point person, the guy who got me this job, and he told me to sit tight. Well, I'm still sitting tight, because I haven't heard from him. So how the hell can I start my job tomorrow if I don't even know who to ask for my pass?
The only saving grace is that there are a lot of people coming in tomorrow at the same time as I. A few of them I think I might even remember, either from crewing Vikings regular season games or the Super Bowl earlier this year. We'll all be in the same boat, wondering just how in the hell are we supposed to do our jobs. Wish us luck.
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