The List Of Items I Am Donating To Goodwill Today

• Black/Dark Gray/Charcoal Gap khakis: They're great and they've been really good to me, but unfortunately, I don't fit in them anymore.
• A pair of light gray socks: Both have holes in the heels.
• Beige-and-white-striped Gap khakis: I remember last year, while I was working a Vikings game, I bent over and it ripped at my asshole.
• A blue-on-dark blue-vertical striped Perry Ellis shirt that was given to me by the one who hired me as an intern at the El Paso baseball club back in 2001: A series of washings and hangings has created hanger spots at the shoulders.  It's been good to me as well; the guy gave me the clothes, I took them back to Minnesota with me and wore them from time to time.  But those ... pilling spots (?) are too noticeable for me to wear this anymore, I'm afraid.
• Boxers from American Eagle, the one that's white but has a series of one wide yellow and two narrow blue stripes that run vertically throughout it: There's a tear in the, uh, underneath place.
• Boxers from Aeropostale, the one that's blue but is checkered, Mondrian-style and has a one-button fly: The elastic band is all stretched out.
• The red, checkered pajama bottoms Grandmother bought for me: I wouldn't mind still wearing it, to be honest with you, but the elastic band is all stretched out, the waistband is starting to tear (I put them on and when I tied it up with the drawstring, I tore it some more), and there's a rip just to the left of the one-button fly.  My parents would have a field day if I wore this.