Wednesday, January 15, 2020

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Gopher women's hockey (Last Week: 0).  The pull that an NFL team has on a sports city is stronger than a black hole.  The Vikings -- which you'll see at the bottom of this survey -- was riding high after a big upset win last week, and so it felt as though the entire metro area riding high.  But now, after the Vikings ended their season with a thud, nothing in this town feels as if it's going well.  That may be appearance more than anything, even though a lot of the squads this screening week did not play well.  But after Saturday night, Twin Cities sports fans are looking at a long and bleak winter ... just like last winter.

With that being said, there is always the University of Minnesota women's hockey team.  They swept the Huskies in St. Cloud over the weekend by a combined 7-1.  Then again, like last season, it's Minnesota and Wisconsin and then there's everyone else.  It's like the U.S. and Canada in professional women's hockey.

This weekend they host Ohio St. for two.  The Saturday contest will be played outdoors, in Parade Park in Minneapolis, as part of Hockey Day Minnesota.

#-2: Gopher wrestling (Re-Entry!).  OK, I don't know how this happened, but Minnesota is ranked third in the country.  They lost to Oklahoma St., Rider and Lehigh and are ranked third in the country?!  Whatever.

With that being said, the Gophers won a sizable Border Battle Friday at Maturi.  Wisconsin, ranked ninth in the country, came across the Mississippi and lost to the U., 20-14.  For what it's worth, the Gophers have won four Duals in a row, with a trip to Michigan St. and Michigan this weekend.

#-3: Twins (Re-Entry!).  They're here because they signed Josh Donaldson to a four-Year contract with an option for a fifth.  He's expected to man First Base.  He was arguably the most well-known name still a free agent, and there were several clubs that wanted him.  That Minnesota out-muscled many teams (including incumbent Atlanta) to a $92 million contract may be the most-heralded free agent signing in town since ... Brett Favre?

With that being said -- are they going to sign any pitching better than Rich Hill and Homer Bailey?

#-4: Gopher men's basketball (Last Week: -1).  Maybe this is to be expected: They lost on the road -- at Michigan St., big -- Thursday, then returned home and beat Michigan.  They were behind the Wolverines but started to come back late in the First Half.  Daniel Oturu was The Man in that Game, and really is The Man all season.  I'm not sure if this one-win, one-loss water-chopping is going to lead them to The Big Dance, however.

This week: Home tomorrow versus Penn St., then at Rutgers Sunday afternoon.

#-5: Gopher men's hockey (Re-Entry!).  Split at Michigan St.  Got drubbed Friday, 4-1, but at least they screwed up some #PrideOnIce and blanked Sparty, 2-0 -- the club's first Shutout since November 17, 2018.  We're still waiting for the resurgence, however.

They host the the Team USA Under-18 team Friday.  They are back to play for real the following weekend.

#-6: Timberwolves (Last Week: -2).  With Karl-Anthony Towns still out, the Woofie Dogs went 1-2 this screening week.  Somehow they blew out Portland and Target, but then got blasted by 30 at Houston, then got blasted at home by the Thunder.

Right now they're playing Indiana at home.  This starts a stretch where nine of the next ten opponents are currently in playoff position.  They make a return date Friday.  Woofs then come home the next night to play Toronto, then host Denver Monday.

#-7: Wild (Last Week: -3).  OK, stick a fork in this fuckin' team.  Lost at Calgary, got drubbed at home to Vancouver, then got drilled in Pittsburgh, 7-3, in a Game where, somehow, they played only five Defensemen.  Forward Ryan Donato was supposed to be a healthy scratch, but an Assistant Coach scratched D-Man Greg Pateryn instead.  By the first TV timeout, the Penguins were up 2-0.

Three is a four-Game homestretch before the All-Star Game and the week-long bye.  They play Saturday as they anchor Hockey Day Minnesota.  Unfortunately, they host The Team That Was Stolen From Us.  Now why in the fuck do we invite The Bastard North Stars to Our Day?  The franchise's deference/normalization to the North Stars belonging to Dallas fuckin' pisses me off.  Anyway, the other home opponents are Tampa Bay, Florida and Detroit.

#-8: Gopher women's basketball (Last Week: -4).  Meanwhile the Gopher women's team is in all sorts of trouble now.  Lost both matches this screening week -- home to Northwestern Thursday on a late basket, then at Illinois Sunday afternoon by three Points.  Worse yet, in the Game versus the Illini, leading scorer Destiny Pitts was suspended for, like, conduct unbecoming.  After a very good non-conference record, this team, which has lost four in a row, is in a tailspin -- just like last year.  Not only is this team in disarray, the program might be, too.

This week: Home to Iowa tomorrow, at Purdue Sunday afternoon.

#-Infinity: Vikings (Last Week: Positive Numbers).  I really thought they had a chance to be San Francisco Saturday.  I really did.  How foolish of me.

Mike Zimmer has a basic philosophy.  It goes beyond thinking that you build a winning team through running and defense, even though it is, fundamentally, a sound strategy.  He tried marrying that with the addition of Kirk Cousins who has a skill set that is, and I do not say this as an insult, simple.  He works best off of play action, which means he needs a good running game to complement that skill set, and he works best when he has a clean pocket, which is the same for every Quarterback.

That presents a binary solution.  If those pieces are there and they're working, chances are the Vikings are going to win.  But if those pieces aren't there and they're not working, chances are they will lose.  And the latter was made abundantly clear, oh, from halfway through the Second Quarter on.  The Vikings, who surprised everybody by dominating the lines of both side of the ball, were completely dominated by the 49ers in the trenches.  Thus, Dalvin Cook & Co. were rendered impotent.  Thus, no play action, and thus Cousins was basically a stump for most of the game.  That results in a 27-10 loss and the end of the season.  See, if the Vikes had a QB that could scramble, or run, or somehow improvise plays through playground passes or his feet, maybe the club could stay in some Games.  But with the talent they have, improvisation is just not part of their DNA.

And that's why they lost.  Well, that and the fact that, frankly, San Fran has more talent.  Like I said (sort of), it started promising in the First Quarter, but it slowly slipped away in the Second.  I was listening to that part at work; I got home just after Richard Sherman intercepted Cousins's pass, and I was good for the rest of the Game.  I went to Panchero's, and I caught the final score while eating there.

I'm not certain how to think of the season.  I thought they would go 8-8 and miss the playoffs, so in that sense, these guys over-performed.  Moreover, there is that upset win in New Orleans, a Game which the squad (OPI no-call excepted) earned.  But, well, I still think that any season short of a championship is a failure.  And beyond that, the humiliating loss exposes a lot of holes that need to be solved ... and Zimmer and Rick Spielman will have to solve them without Kevin Stefanski, who was named Head Coach of the Cleveland Browns the following day.  (It's not as if the exact opposite has to lead the exact opposite effect, but I truly believe Stefanski's mind was not 100% on coaching the Game Saturday.)

Offensive line, even though they were terrific when zone-blocking for the running game.  Secondary.  A third Wide Receiver.  Plus they have to worry about an aging and expensive core, especially on the defensive side of the ball; who's going to leave, because someone has to.  Oh, and Cook is going to get his payday.  There are a lot of moving parts, and even though the Vikings avoided having a down year this year, the possibility that next year will go pear-shaped is only growing.

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