Tuesday, March 17, 2020

My 2018 Playboy Playmate Of The Year

Feel bad that Playboy has fallen so far out of my pornographic pursuits.  But the Internet has made smut so readily accessible, and allowed all of us to follow our kinks, that the professional, "Girl Next Door" ethos of the original porn mag has lost circulation -- so much so that this year was, like the couple (?) years before, six bi-monthly issues instead of 12 monthly.  Also, it made me forget that, for a few years (at least I think), I would do an annual assessment of who I think should be Playmate Of The Year.

This is 2020, obviously.  I forgot I didn't do one for 2018.  That's how far Playboy is now out of my life.  But I want to be a completist, plus I want to think of something else besides COVID-19, so this is as good a time as any to finally give you my pick for '18 PMOY.

Oh, another reason I've turned away from Playboy: They don't show pussy.  I think it was 2017 where they finally reversed their strange decision to not show boobie, but they still have not gone back to showing full frontal.  It's a shame, because I think pretty much all of the Playmates in 2018 are hot.  (Maybe the big exception: Miss December, Emanuel Jordan -- who was picked as Playmate Of The Year.  Agree to disagree.)  If I had to extend my picks to five, I would toggle the last two spots between Miss February, Megan Samperi (dressed up in a college girl motif) and Miss March, Jenny Watwood (long raven hair, hourglass figure).

In third place is Miss September, Kirby Griffin.  I must admit that the main reason I put her in third is something I find lurid: She was a model in the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue!  It's true!!  Just one year, in 2012!!!  I've gotten every year's issue, and I don't remember Griffin.  But I see her slim body in a swimsuit, and I get off then seeing her out of a swimsuit!

In second place is Shauna Sexton, Miss May.  I like the theme of her pictorial, that of her working out.  Sweat and fitness turns me on.  But in her spread, her most captivating photo was one where she was totally clothed.  She was in scrubs, holding a dog.  You see, not only is she a model (and a hot one; just check out her Instagram), she's a veterinary technician.  An emergency and critical care one at that, too.  I'd like to think that she wants to go into vet medicine after her modeling career is over, and she's studying to be one right now while her modeling is her main hustle.  I respect that.  A lot!

In first place?  Miss October, Olga de Mar.  She is a bottle blonde with a knockout figure.  Hef would've loved her.  But the main reason I put her first is something I now need to take back -- turns out Playboy does show pussy, just not very often.  And imagine my surprise when, after a couple years of a no-bush edict, de Mar's centerfold is her, on a clay tennis court, wearing no clothes, and posing in just enough of a profile that we get to see her razor-thin strip of pubic hair.  Hey, vagina!!!

So yes, for that reason more than anything, Olga de Mar is my 2018 Playboy Playmate Of The Year.

No comments:

Post a Comment