The Worst Fucking Day In Minnesota Sports History

Yesterday afternoon, Taylor Rogers choked on a 5-4 lead and the Twinks lost to the shitty Pittsburgh Pirates.

Later that afternoon, the Mild got shut out by Vancouver and now face elimination from the Stanley Cup Playoffs ... a playoffs they would not even be qualified for if not for the NHL bootstrapping a new format after the season got paused due to the coronavirus pandemic, but whatever.

And last night, the Loonies' run got derailed in an upset (they were favored to win) by Orlando, 3-1.  They just needed to stop Nani, but that motherfucker braced them.

Oh, and ESPN Streak?  Got Wolverhampton right to get to 15, where I actually became one of the leaders, but then got that streak broken after I stupidly decided Denver was going to beat Portland.  Damian Lillard went nuts from three so the Nuggets were trailing, but it was close.  Yet near the end of the Game, Nuggets Head Coach Michael Malone sat Nikola Jokic.  What the fuck are you doing?  YOU COST ME MY STREAK, GODDAMMIT!!!

The past week all Minnesota sports teams were playing really well.  Between last Thursday and Wednesday, the Twins lost once and the Wild lost once, and that was it.  But all three local teams that played Thursday lost Thursday.  But oh, how the fucking worm turns.  A triple loss!!!  WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is The Worst Fucking Day In Minnesota Sports History.  I don't care if I'm being overdramatic.  It's The Worst Fucking Day In Minnesota Sports History.  I wish we could shut down sports again so this bullshit doesn't happen ever again.

Oh, and when I said last night about The ESPN Streak being all icing on the cake?  Fuck that.  I'm a goddamn liar.  This is bullshit, plain and simple.

Some good has to come from this, but jerking off to some female bodybuilder's shit brickhouse ass on Facebook hasn't made me feel any better.  Maybe I'll do some budgeting I've been procrastinating on.

I hate everything right now.  I hate myself right now.  It's taking everything to stop me from banging my head against the wall until I bleed through my ears.

Don't be a sports fan.  It's a road to fucking ruin.