Colonoscopy Thoughts ... If I Can Remember Them

So the colonoscopy went fine.  I received a clean bill of health.  Even got pictures.  Wanna see?

The pictures (and by the way, I appreciate receiving a report after every visit I get a clinic.  I don't read much of what I get after I see my doctor, but in something like this, I like that they're attesting that they found no polyps and there is nothing of concern, and therefore I don't need to get another one of these dastardly things for a decade) are on the grainy side.  I though they'd be more resolute.  Thought they'd be bigger, too.  Frankly, I was thinking that a clean bill of health means that my colon would be, uh, totally a light pink and no bumps and stuff.  I don't think I saw that.  In a couple pictures it looks like there are black spots on my large intestine.  That doesn't look bad.  Maybe it's the photos, which is why I wish they were bigger and better.  But if they say I'm good, well, I'm good, I guess.

I went under.  I asked the doctor just before the scope how unconscious I would be.  He said that I should be awake enough to answer directions.  He also said that if I go out, I am getting more sedative than they intended.  Well, I don't remember anything after he put Vaseline in my asshole.  I could have answered instructions.  Hell, for all I know, he could've told me to sing "Yankee Doodle" and I could've done it.  In other words, if I was awake enough to breathe deep or shift my body, I don't remember.

I don't remember him giving me a post-op debrief, either, even though he was supposed to.  Or maybe he did and I don't remember 'cause I was too groggy.  I remember putting on my underwear after the nurse told me to try and sit up by hanging my legs off the side of my bed.  I don't remember if I still had my gown on, however, because I don't remember taking it off in order to put my clothes on.  Yeah, the more I write about not remembering the operation even though I wasn't supposed to, the more paranoid I am about what I actually did, or what actually happened.

With that being said, I'm home now, safe and, assuming the clean bill of health is correct, healthy enough to not go through that colonoscopy crap again.  I'm catching up on my sleep.  Possibly as much as the number the preparation mixture did on my body and bowels, the disruption to my sleep routine, particularly waking up at 2:45 to drink the second mix before my 6:45 op, is the most onerous part of going through this colonoscopy.  But staying in until lunchtime tomorrow should get me straight, and if it doesn't, I can sleep in Sunday, too.