#-1: Twins (Last Week: -1). OK, you know what? I'm calling it right now -- the Twinks don't have it this year. I understand they finished 3-3 this screening week, and they won the series against Boston (although lost the series versus Texas), they remain stubbornly below .500 and now sit eight games behind Cleveland in the American League Central. (By the way, forget about the Wild Card: Both the Red Sox and Seattle sit north of .600.) Too much inconsistency in the lineup and in the bullpen has contributed to choppy after choppy week, and even though it's before Independence Day, I think I can see the writing on the wall.
The big move is the demotion of Fernando Romero. After a hot start, he has tailed off to the point where Rochester will now do him good. On the flip side, however, we have the makings of a pretty good 1-2 punch. Jose Berrios helped the squad avoid a sweep at the hands of The Bastard Washington Senators v.2.0 with a career high dozen Strikeouts. And Kyle Gibson has been a man reborn since his return to the rotation the middle of last year. He has turned from a hurler to a pitcher, and so he's been much craftier with his arsenal as he advances in his career. I don't know if these guys can turn the season around, or even if these are the two best Pitchers for the team next year. I do know that they are as reliable as anyone on this club this season, and that's saying something.
Well, I don't think I've seen these guys do this before; the Twins will be in Chicago the whole week. First they go to the South Side to face the White Sox in Comiskey, and then they'll travel to Wrigley for a weekend trio vs. the Cubs. This trip will totally save on money!!
#-2 (tie): Timberwolves and Wild (Re-Entry! and Re-Entry!, respectively). I don't know much about either team's "draft grade," so I'm going to lump these two together and do my best to bullshit my through them.
The Woofie Dogs' draft has been poisoned by this talk that Karl-Anthony Towns may be on the move. If that's the case ... well, first of all, this will show that Tom Thibodeau has full say in matters, but might not be in total control. Both he and Andrew Wiggins, the two supposed foundation blocks for this damned squad, are the future. But Thibs, by bringing in his favored sons from his time in Chicago, has not only accelerated that timetable but put a jackhammer to those foundational blocks. Towns was on his way to becoming a star, but with Jimmy Butler arriving, KAT has not so much learned under Butler's tutelage but instead has turned inward in the face of a new alpha dog. That's not good for development. And yet still I would trade Big Wig before Towns. There are still too many cases where Wiggins just looks unmotivated, and takes plays off. If the T-Wolves could have pawned Wiggins off to, say, San Antonio, they would have had a great draft.
Instead, they made no big trades on Thursday and instead went with some guy in the first round I didn't even know existed until I heard his name: Josh Okogie, a Shooting Guard out of Georgia Tech. He is not a big name and not even one of the names local reporters, Internet scribes and cable pundits had recommended: Chandler Hutchison from Boise St., Aaron Holiday from UCLA, Robert Williams from Texas A&M, or Bruce Brown, Jr. from Miami. I hope that he is one of those "3-and-D" guys who are the main dudes in Today's NBA, but the next time I see him play is the first time I see him play. At any rate, I really like the Timberwolves selecting Keita Bates-Diop, Small Forward and Big Ten Men's Basketball Player Of The Year, in the second round. I don't think he should have fallen that far.
I know even less about hockey prospects, so everybody the Mild took Friday and Saturday are more people I didn't know I shared the earth with. Well, I did look up the club's first-round pick, Swedish Defenseman Filip Johansson. He has been described in one ESPN article as an "intriguing late-first round pick." And that's all I got. I could bag Tom Fenton for not doing more, but he just got into the job as General Manager, and even with this front office job, he gets a mulligan. All in all, I can't say if either the T-Wolves or the Wild had a better draft, so I'll just put them into a tie here and then throw them off the survey until the regular season starts for both teams.
#-3: United FC (Re-Entry!). People are saying that the side's 3-2 loss at Colorado Saturday was not only the low point of the season but for the brief history of the franchise. I think we should pump the brakes on that sentiment. I still believe it's San Jose coming to TCF Bank Stadium and whipping our Loons 3-1 on May 12 is the nadir because I think the Earthquakes were at the time the worst team in Major League Soccer and MNUFC lost embarrassingly at home. Also there were a lot of mitigating circumstances surrounding this loss to the Rapids beyond the fact that this was being contested in Commerce City. The ref, by all accounts, blew chunks, especially when he red-carded Miguel Ibarra for shoving the Rapids' Danny Wilson but didn't also toss Wilson for being a dick and not giving Batman the ball. The ref also erred, by many accounts, for giving so much goddamn injury time, allowing Colorado to score the game-winner (and end a long losing streak) in the 97th minute. Finally, by all accounts, the turf was shit, as Brent Kallman slipped and dug up a track of sod (do I have that right?) while tracking back, allowing the Raps to tally the tying Goal.
Nevertheless, while I was in St. Paul, on my way from the Jazz Fest, I passed by a restaurant with TVs showing the game. I peer in, see that the Loons were leading 2-1, and I felt happy. Not only did I see on ESPN's crawl that they blew that lead, but they also scored the first Goal of the game and blew that too. And Colorado is (or maybe was) the worst team in MLS. Minnesota: Every shitty team's slump-buster. Again, I'm not saying this is an all-time low. But it's close.
For the first time in a month and three days (these guys had five home games between April 28 and May 26; why couldn't the league swap one of those home dates for either road date on June 3 or Saturday?), Minnesota United play at home Friday against FC Dallas. Maybe some long-overdue home-cooking will do these guys good. Or not.
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