My day actually started Tuesday. Well, maybe even Monday. We had our first snowstorm Monday. It was supposed to be huge -- forecasts Sunday night said we would get a foot, maybe even 18 inches. We didn't get that much, however, maybe half a foot. That's a huge blessing from Mother Nature. Nevertheless it was the wet and heavy snow, therefore I plowed the driveway.
I said before I love my parents' Toro. It made the driveway so clean that I decided to make it spotless. I turned on both of the cars, just for a few minutes, just so I could move them to the street, just so I could plow the whole driveway. Man, it was beautiful.
After that (and I know this is a long story, just go with me), I was going to fill up my parents' minivan. But since I thought I did such a masterful, manly job with the driveway, and I was going to charge the gasoline to my credit card, I decided to treat myself and go to a Buffalo Wild Wings and charge that.
I indulged in Happy Hour-priced chili con queso, then I ordered eight wings because it was Wing Tuesday. I was going to limit myself to one beer, but due to an overpour mistake (and I don't say this to be arrogant, I'd rather it not happen) I was given another beer (also a Coors Light, just like the one I ordered). And I didn't want to waste the beer, so I stayed 2 1/2 hours to finish the second one.
So by the time I got home, after I left around 5:45 and stopped at the gas station before returning home, it was 9 and I was both full and, well, drunk. So I listened to my body and conked off to sleep at 9:30.
Unfortunately this was unconsciousness due to drunkenness, not fatigue, so I woke up at 2. I realized I needed to do some things online, including the Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey. By the time I did all that, masturbated and brushed my teeth it was an hour before I had to wake up, and I knew by then I wouldn't be able to sneak in another nap. So I tried meditating, laid in my bed till my iPhone sounded the alarm, and I went off, reluctantly, to work.
I could have tried to sneak in some shut-eye during lunch, but not this day. We had a pizza party Wednesday afternoon, to celebrate ... no, to mourn the temps that were fired yesterday. So I got full again with food bad for me, a mere 18 hours after I did it the first time.
Just before the end of my workday I could feel my brain shutting down. That's when waking up too early and not being able to go back to sleep started to hit me. Nevertheless I had to see my psychiatrist (yeah, I should talk about that, or at least as much as I can). Then, as has been my ritual, I went to a place to eat dinner close by so I could wait out the traffic. I was tired, but I made it all the way home.
But not without forgetting a few things. On my way to the shrink I realized I had left my watch at work. Crazy day, again, augmented by the loss of a few good people who I relied on to get the project done. Then, after I got home, I realized that I did not pick up the to-go cup of Coke I had asked my waitress at the restaurant for. It was left sitting on my table. I promptly forgot it as soon as I got up from my seat and put on my coat. Shoot, I even picked up the check from my table, but not the Coke. So I just got up and left it, even though I specifically requested it.
You know, I remember this one time I was at college. A friend of mine was treating me for dinner at Third Street Promenade in Santa Monica, Calif. I had leftovers and was going to bring it with me to his car before we saw the documentary Hoop Dreams. But even though it was put in a container and a plastic bag for me, I got up and left, leaving it behind. (My friend obviously didn't notice it either.) So I've done it before.
Question is, How the heck could I forget? One thing I thought of was that I decided not to take a sip of Coke from the to-go cup because (and I don't think this makes me weird) I had eaten a slice of pie (this is place is known for their pies) and I don't think you can wash down dessert with a soft drink because that's, uh, inappropriate. You would think that if you consume something, you would be cognizant of that object and take it with you, you know? That I didn't made it easier for me to forget about it. But I had eaten half of the food with my friend back in college, and I forgot about the to-go box. Also, I had dinner out after seeing my psychiatrist last Wednesday and I asked for a Coke to go and I had dessert and I didn't take sip of Coke when I had my pie, and I remembered to take it home (and I still have that cup of Coke in the fridge).
So, I forgot because it was a long goddamn day, one that was set up from the snowstorm overnight Sunday. OK, I blame you, Mother Nature. I blame you for my waste of a Coke.
Oh, by the way, you all remember who Forgetful Jones is, from Sesame Street, right?
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