Positive Numbers: Gopher football (Last Week: -6). It was largely a boom-or-bust week; most of the ten teams on the list either won every game or lost every game. That's kind of a trick question; that's largely due to the influence of the University of Minnesota teams, most of which are in their early, non-conference, bodybag part of their schedules.
In a sense, then, that makes what the Golden Gopher football team last Saturday in Lincoln, Neb., that much more impressive. In the heart of their Murderers' Row of games to end their season, the club came back from a 14-point deficit to beat Nebraska 28-24. Once again the U. had to hold on for dear life, but with Cornhusker De'Mornay Pierson-El about to run the ball he caught into the end zone, Junior Cornerback (and current co-B1G Defensive Player Of The Week) Briean Boddy-Calhoun somehow stripped the ball, which was recovered by Minnesota. That preserved the first win by the U. at Nebraska since 1960.
Yeah, so this is not the Tom Osborne Cornhuskers of the 80s, the ones that emasculated the Gophers, like, 73-14. But like I've said before, even though the opponents may not be that formidable, previous Minnesota squads were also not that formidable. Therefore, that makes what Jerry Kill is doing right now ever the more remarkable. I don't remember the last time -- maybe the Glen Mason years -- where the football team has been able to punch even a little over its weight class. I just wanted this team to beat teams it was supposed to beat at home, and then beat crappy teams on the road. This is the next step: Beating good teams (not great, good teams) on the road. They are far away from being a contender in the Big Ten, let alone a perennial contender, let alone a national playoff team. But Kill has followed up a breakthrough with an even better one. That is this "Brick By Brick" slogan the U.'s athletic department website keeps talking about, but Kill is walking the walk. Heck, he should be in the running for Coach Of The Year. (Congratulations, by the way, should go out to Maxx Williams, named Tuesday as one of three finalists for the Mackey, the award given to college football's best Tight End.)
In fact, even if the Golden Gophers lose at Wisconsin in Saturday afternoon's regular season finale 222-0, that does not erase the success this team, and this program, has had this year. No one in their wildest dreams thought the U. would make it even this far. And if they somehow go into Camp Randall Stadium and beat the Badgers, which I gave a puncher's chance of them doing? They win the B1G West and earn a grudge match against Ohio St., a team they lost by only seven points to, in Indianapolis the following week. A fan can dream, especially after his team notched an improbable come-from-behind upset last weekend.
#-0: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: -3). This 0 ranking does not mean that I think this club has turned a corner and will all of a sudden spring a surprise run in the NCAA Tournament. I still get the feeling this team will lose in the first round. But you can't lose in the first round if you don't even make it in the tourney, and with these Gophs beating back Maryland in Maryland in five sets, then coming home to sweep a ranked Purdue team, they have banked enough wins (buoyed by their membership in the B1G, as they are still 8-10) to grab one of the final at-large spots. Of course, it would help if they could win the final two games of the regular season: At Ohio St. tonight (Wednesday night/Thanksgiving Eve) and at home against Indiana Friday.
#-1: Gopher women's hockey (Last Week: 0). Well, after that double-hiccup against Bemidji St., the lady Gopher icers have won five games in a row. I knew they were playing a home-and-home vs. Minnesota State-Mankato; they crushed the Mavericks at their place 5-1 Friday, then crushed them at Ridder Arena 4-0 Saturday. What I did not see, however, is that they played yet another game this screening week, a special United States Hockey Hall Of Fame Women's Face-Off Classic on Monday at a local rink named Braemar Arena in the suburb of Edina, against St. Cloud St. Oh, and they blanked the Huskies 5-0. Sophomore Forward Dani Cameranesi was named WCHA Offensive Player Of The Week, and Freshman Forward Kelly Pannek WCHA Rookie Of The Week.
A very interesting series Thanksgiving Weekend: They play a pair at Princeton Saturday and Sunday.
#-2: Gopher women's basketball (Last Week: -2). The U.'s two b-ball teams are in the resume-padding part of their schedule, but I give the women a higher nod this week. That's because they at least scheduled a true road game, against Memphis, and moreover came back to beat the Tigers on Sunday, 68-62. I have no idea how good Memphis is supposed to be, but it's always noticeable whenever a team goes into enemy territory and eke out a win, mostly because very few teams from the BcS Five are playing road games this point in the season.
The Gophers are currently undefeated; they're 4-0 after trashing HBCU Southern Tuesday night. They are now in Ft. Myers, Fla. over the Thanksgiving Holiday, participating in the Gulf Coast Showcase. The U. starts the tournament (?) against Vanderbilt.
#-3: Gopher wrestling (Last Week: -1). They beat the ever-living shit out of Michigan St., 36-3. (They also beat Grand Canyon 36-8, but I don't know if they count.) That's why they remain the #1 team in the country. Saturday night they have a pretty big dual at the Sports Pavilion against grappling power Oklahoma St. I was at the last time the Cowboys played the Gophers here, and Minnesota lost. I might be free to watch that evening.
#-4: Wild (Last Week: Positive Numbers). They have the makings of a very good team -- Wednesday night notwithstanding. They won two-of-three on the road, sandwiching a loss to Tampa Bay with victories at Philadelphia and Florida. This team is being led by the character of Zach Parise, and that may be leading the youngsters, in particular Jason Zucker, to play their hearts out.
Unfortunately, as I type this they are getting killed at the X by the Stanley Cup champion L.A. Kings. After this they visit The Team That Was Stolen From Us Friday, then come back home to host St. Louis the next night.
#-5: Gopher men's basketball (Last Week: -4). Well, this is the reason why you fatten up your schedule to begin your year. They almost doubled-up a lower-tier cupcake named Franklin Pierce, then destroyed Marlyand-Baltimore County, both at home. That was prelude to this week's NIT Season Tip-Off at Madison Square Garden, where the Goofs just lost to putative home team St. John's. So we are getting the idea of how good this team is and isn't. Friday they face the loser of the Gonzaga-Georgia game, then on Tuesday they visit Wake Forest and take their part in the ACC/Big Ten Challenge.
#-6: Timberwolves (Last Week: -7). Well, fuck. Now Kevin Martin is gone for up to two months because of a broken wrist. Many people in the know say that Martin was the last good thing this team has, so now the Woofie Dogs are going to play howlingly bad, at least until Thaddeus Young and Ricky Rubio come back from the injured list.
They were at Target Center all week, and they were able to beat dysfunctional New York before losing to San Antonio and Sacramento. Right now, like the Mild, the T-Wolves are playing at home, and it's a tight match against Milwaukee. That begins a busy week, and it's all on the road -- Lakers, Portland, Clippers, all three games over four days.
#-7: Vikings (Last Week: -5). Moral victories aren't worth crap, but I know I am not alone in believing that Green Bay was going to come into TCF Bank Stadium and pillage the Vikes by at least 20 points. In that sense this is ... progress.
Nevertheless there are signs that Teddy Bridgewater is not improving at a rate that leads me to believe that he is going to be a great Quarterback. Even worse, and more apparent, is the regressing play of Matt Kalil, who was beaten so often he had to resort to holding. (Fans have noticed; Kalil flipped over some heckler's hat on his way out of the stadium.) He has a bad knee, but once again I am frustrated that a man once touted to be a Hall of Famer in one of the most important positions on the field may be on his way off of the team.
The Packers are the first of three straight home games now that the Gophers' season is winding down. This Sunday they face the Carolina Panthers, a club with the same record as the Vikes, I think, yet have a much better shot of winning their division and thus hosting a playoff game.
#-Infinity: Gopher men's hockey (Last Week: -8). I didn't think I had to blog about them, but I have to. Why? Because the squad lost to a bunch of fucking boys. On Friday they lost in overtime to the United States Under-18 team -- at home. How the fuck do you allow that to happen? For that these guys get an honorary spot at the absolute shit-lowest part of the WMNSS. Shit, you might as well cancel the season. I mean, I can't even. A special interconference series at Boston College this weekend.
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