OK. Starting with Saturday, October 3:
- I felt free to get up at 6 Saturday morning and drive downtown to The Local to enjoy a long morning of English Premier League soccer because my parents wouldn't wonder why am I up so early. Whenever two non-popular teams, such as Crystal Palace and West Bromwich Albion, is the 6:45 game, apparently you are the only person there to watch. Chatted up the worker there manning the TVs for soccer. Nice guy. Stayed for the 9 o'clock games, where I had the breakfast buffet. Tasty, and I get a free Bloody Mary to go along with it, but I've been shitting my organs out ever since. With tip: $18.
- Went home in the afternoon to sleep, then in the evening I went to the U. to watch the volleyball team beat top 10-ranked Illinois. Hell of a game; tell you more in the WMNSS. Hot dog, Coke, program: $9.25.
- Finished my night at My Favorite Late-Night Italian Place. Was going to go for a double cheeseburger and fries because I had only so much money in my pocket. But the Oregon-Colorado game was delayed by an hour due to lightning, and then the game was close, so I decided to add a bowl of soup as I enjoyed the rest of the game, which Oregon won with ease at the end. With tip: $11.
- Friday the 2nd: ***a* sucks my dick. Really can't afford to do this, but I am being good in making sure I only go to strip clubs or do sexual things once a week. I am on a budget. Wish I could only show her how good her cock-sucking skills by cumming. I am getting old: $120.
- I then went to the library to make copies and have PDF files printed out in regards to this claim form for some real estate my parents hold in Vegas. I still have no goddamn clue if I'm doing it right, or even if they have a claim to damages at all. While doing all of this I think I slipped one of the original deeds into the package I was sending, so, fuck me. Whatever. The total for doing all of this is: $2.40.
- Went to a local art gallery. Haven't been there in a long time. Complimentary wine? Good deal. Wish I had tried the merlot instead of sticking with the Cabernet Sauvignon. Anyway, the painter of the exhibit said that it was about one thing, yet I thought it had very deep geopolitical overtones. Does he understand that? Made the suggestion donation of: $3.
- Went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Edition). Honestly, the beef this weirdo stripper bitch has with me will be less of a reason for me to visit less often than the fact that coffee is now $2.75. On principle I keep wanting to tip just a quarter. But one of the strippers there shamed into going back to the waitress, which is not the weirdo stripper bitch, and handing over a dollar beyond the quarter. Great -- I just spent four bucks on a goddamn shitty cup of black coffee. This is insane! With stage tips: $12.
- On Thursday the 1st I went to Caribou. Plus cookie, tip: $6.
- Then I went to an experiment at the U. where the person I had arranged it with didn't show up. Strange. An Infusion of: $10.
- Wednesday, September 30 ... Went to Caribou. Plus cookie, tip: $6.
- On Tuesday the 29th I made money doing another research study at the U. An Infusion of: $20.
- Monday the 28th -- The Nomad Pub was going to not be open at 2 for the Monday English Premier League game, even though the website said they would be. I dutifully and quietly waited for them to open up the locked front door because the lights and TV inside were on. But when I told the guy who opened the door that the website said they were open at 2, they let me in. I was the only customer at the bar, (although there were, like, four workers doing maintenance and inventory) and it was really nice to bring Arby's in to watch the game. With Surly, parking (which discounted the Surly) and tip: $5.
- I was busy that weekend, and I think I charged everything I did pay for in the interim, so on Wednesday, September 23 I went to my Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Version) in the afternoon in the hopes that that weirdo stripper ripoff bitch wouldn't be working there. Goddammit, she was. That plan's ruined. Coffee, tips, and a dance from Katie: $29.75.
- On Tuesday the 22nd I was able to line up a research study at the U. It was a predictive game where I had to guess the right number of "units" in order to eliminate inventory while satiating demand as much as possible. I exclaimed, "Shit!" one time and got a friendly slap in the back by the proctor. But I believe I did well enough to earn the maximum amount of money. An Infusion of: $19.
- After the study I went to the movies to see the latest Transporter. I've always been intrigued with stories featuring a nameless protagonist with little backstory, but it was more of a European-tinged bore. Ticket, popcorn, pop: $9.75.
- Monday, September 21, where I started my day at Caribou. Pumpkin white chocolate mocha, cookie, tip: $6.45.
- That afternoon I continued to work on the Internet at Caffetto, where I had a pumpkin pie with my coffee. Plus tip: $6.
- Saturday, September 19 was the first game where I and the rest of the alumni group were able to watch our alma mater's games at our usual spot. But because the Twins were playing downtown and there was this pop-up beer festival sponsored by Deshutes, I had to cave and park in a lot. And the event prices are a bitch: $13.
- I wanted to go to this pop-up bar, so I went downtown early. I liked the Deshutes, and the reason for it: To raise money for Second Harvest Heartland. Made a small donation, so along with the beer I bought, I spent: $6.
- Conducted a 50/50 Raffle for the game. Spent: $5.
- After getting home after the game I realized I had not put in my donation for the Trivia Night a few days before: $10.
- Go back to Wednesday the 16th, where I had to go to the library to make copies for that evening's fundraiser/Trivia Night. Turns out I didn't need them at all; I just said that was what I was there for, and they marked it. Waste of: $1.20.
- Somewhere that day I picked up a head's-up penny. An Infusion of: 1 cent.
- After the Trivia Night was over (thank God) I went to Caffetto to decompress. Hot chocolate and tip comes out to: $3.
- Tuesday the 15th: Went to see Straight Outta Compton. An important biopic covering NWA, one of the most influential yet overlooked bands in the modern history of music. But I fear that it is a lot less accurate than it needed to be. In fact, this biopic (produced by NWA, of course) really kissed their ass while glossing over a lot of the unseemly details in the band members' lives. In that sense it was disappointing to be paying for propaganda. Ticket, popcorn, Coke: $9.75.
- On Monday the 14th I started my day at Caribou. Plus cookie and tip: $6.
- I then went to Buffalo Wild Wings to make sure that everything is in place for Wednesday. I then was given the fairest Riot Act ever. Got lunch but only water to drink; glad I didn't give them more money by ordering a beer, huh? With tip: $8.75.
- Then I went to the Nomad, and because it was convenient I parked in the lot close by and get the payment for parking off the beer I was going to get. But when I tried to open the front door in time to see the opening kick of the EPL game between West Ham and Newcastle, it was locked. Checked the calendar on their website; they were closed in the afternoon. Maybe I would be told to check the website before I go, but they were open in Monday afternoons in the past. Why can't I assume the bar would be open on this Monday? Why can't I assume some consistency? So to park for two hours when I actually parked for only 15 minutes I wasted: $2.
- Sunday the 13th: Woke up late, got out around 11. Could've went to BWW to watch the kickoff of the first Sunday of the NFL, but at least The Local showed the Packers-Bears game. After I saw the first couple drives I went to the University of Minnesota women's soccer game, where they absolutey dee-stroyed Nebraska-Omaha, 9-1. I was looking on my smartphone for much of the match. I do it in routs like this one but I also do it in close soccer games. Feel bad because I missed the last of the Gopher goals just before Full Time. Will try and do better next match. Hot dog, Coke, program totals: $9.25.
- I think I found a penny while at Elizabeth Lyle Robbie Stadium. An Infusion of: 1 cent.
- When I went home I saw my brother and sister-in-law's car in my space. That meant that I would have to move my car back to where their car is once they left. I have a phobia that some of the teenage shits around the neighborhood will smash my car's rear window because it's so close to the street. But turning on the engine just for a minute to move it thirty feet will add impurities to the oil, and that's bad for the car. Well, might as well go out after dinner. So I went to Caffetto to work on my computer. Had a pumpkin praline cheesecake and hot chocolate for dessert. With tip: $6.75.
- On Saturday the 12th I had Caffetto, too. Just a small coffee, though. With tip: $2.
- Friday, September 11 -- started off at Caribou. Used the survey coupon to get a buck off any pastry. I'll probably never use the survey coupon again, so I bought the most expensive one, banana bread. Had to get a medium mocha to get that discount, though. Minus ten cents for getting the trivia question right, but plus tip, and it all came out to: $6.
- The good thing about unemployment is that I can hit ********a's party in the afternoon, when there are fewer people. That allows me to whip it out with a far less chance a guy will be around to ruin it for me. I didn't do it for everyone, but ... well, let's just say that ****a broke one of ********a's rules on me, and I had to give her two dances in return. Plus a dance apiece from the other three strippers there and cover: $110.
- After that I went to the volleyball match, where the Gophers swept in a fine return to form. Hot dog, Coke, program: $9.25.
- Then, because I was freaking out over whether it made sense to try and have the alumni group visit St. Paul for just one week, I came up with the smart idea that maybe I should actually go to that place the night before to see if it's possible. Turned out to be a really smart idea, because I was able to talk to someone who said he was going to be working the next night for the game and said he would take care of us. And they did. Glad I came in for wings and a Miller Light. With tip: $12.83.
- On Thursday the 10th I pulled off the feat of going to two experiments at the University of Minnesota. I remember once that I actually was able to line up four studies to do at the U. in one day. Sure, I didn't make a whole lot of money compared to a day from one of my temp jobs, but the ability to string together four different studies made me fell really resourceful. So I had an Infusion of: $30.
- And then I had another Infusion of: $10.
- Wednesday, September 9 ... Caribou, where I was convinced to buy their seasonal pumpkin
what(ETA at 10:50 p.m. on October 6 that I meant "white") chocolate mocha. With cookie and tip I paid: $6.50. - One of those experiments was a two-day experiment, the first day of which was this day. Glad it was the big one. An Infusion of: $30.
- This was a good time to use the Chipotle coupon I got from the Cultivate festival. It was for a free burrito. I was going to give a tip of two bucks, but at the time I was worried about money in my wallet, and I used what I deemed not the speediest service along the Chipotle line to take one of the dollars back. I hope they didn't see me pull it back, but if they didn't, that's the reason why I pulled it back. So I only spent: $1.
- Wanted to go to Caffetto to work on my computer, but their wi-fi was on the fritz. I was doing my auction then, so I went to Urban Bean. Well, I thought I was doing my auction then, but it was delayed by two hours because we had an odd number of teams ... I don't want to talk about it, I don't even want to think about it. Mocha plus tip: $4.75.
- On Monday the 7th, aka Labor Day, I spent the afternoon at the State Fair one final time. Got a Minneapple Pie and two foods that were the new food sensations of the Fair, a pretzel croissant sandwich from the French Meadow and a butter queen coffee ice cream from the Hamline Dining Hall. My verdict? Both were good but not mind-blowing, although the ice cream was a tad better. Total: $21.50.
- After that I went to Urban Bean. I think I went to Caffetto first, but this was when I sat down and realized that the wi-fi still wasn't working from a previous day, so I literally got up and packed up the laptop and walked four blocks to Urban Bean to work on my computer. Glad that the guys at Caffetto aren't too bad out of shape with me coming in and then leaving without paying anything. But I think I've been good to these people for years. Charged the iced coffee, so this EWR is just for the tip: 50 cents.
- Sunday, September 6 -- My EWR this day starts at My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Version). Noticed that my visits here are fewer and farther between. Coffee, tips: $11.
- Then went to the Minneapolis Institute of Arts. Donation: $1.
- To Friday the 4th, where, I think, I went to a Dunn Bros. for a mocha IceCrema. Plus tip: $4.75.
- I think I then took my second trip to the State Fair because I wanted to see A Prairie Home Companion for the first and, probably, the final time. Garrison Keillor, the creator and host, has announced he is retiring after this upcoming season. Keillor is a Minnesota institution, and I had to see him before he went, and the State Fair was the perfect time to do it. Had Sweet Martha's Cookies with All-You-Can-Drink milk, which is the way it's supposed to be, even if the milk has doubled in price to two dollars. Also had Corn on the Cob, which was an impulse buy that made me feel fat, even though it was tasty. Total: $10.50.
- Shit, I felt I overate with corn on the cob at the Fair, but I think I went to My Favorite Late-Night Italian Place after the Fair to eat some more. Soup, salad and tip: $8.25.
- Goddamn, we are going back in time ... on Friday, August 28 I had a turtle mocha at Caribou. No cookie. Don't know why; it was a long time ago. With tip: $5.
- Went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Division) for coffee and tips: $9.
- Went to the library for printouts and copies. I think this was for some things I was going to take to St. Louis with me. One of them was a coupon to the local Tilted Kilt ... which I promptly forgot to stuff into my luggage for my vacation. Why the hell did I waste printing it out if I don't remember to bring it with me on vacation? I've realized while doing this EWR that I've wasted a lot of money -- four bucks and counting -- printing and copying. This time: 40 cents.
- Then I went to Caffetto that afternoon for an iced mocha. With tip: $4.25.
- Thursday, August 27 was the first day of the Minnesota State Fair, and I had to go then! Stuffed my face real good, too -- Pronto Pup, O'Gara's Pretzel Curds (which was introduced the year before to rave reviews -- eh, it was alright, but just the same was regular cheese curds, just less greasy), Mini-Donut beer (that was introduced a few years ago, and it tastes like alcoholic candy!), a large Coke and regular french fries (I didn't really need those last two items), I spent a grand total of: $25.
- I then went to the library to make copies. Hope these were useful. Three copies makes: 30 cents.
- Wednesday the 26th: Caribou. Plus cookie, tip: $6.
- Had lunch that day at a Quizno's close to my psychiatrist. Used a coupon. I have a receipt with this, but I want to make sure I get the amount I spent, plus tip, down. So yeah, I'm fudging the rules on this. Hey, I'm going through 2 1/2 months of this shit: $10.25.
- Tuesday the 25th. I had a really tough time figuring out which movie I wanted to see. I was going to watch Fantastic Four for two reasons: It is part of the Marvel Universe, and it reportedly was rife with such dysfunction (to the point where the director slammed his own movie before it was released) that I had to see how much of a shitshow it was. But I couldn't get over the fact that it was so poorly reviewed -- 15% according to Rotten Tomatoes. At the end of it all I couldn't bring myself to watch it. So I settled on a little-promoted film on the way other end of the Rotten Tomatoes meter -- 99%, in fact: Shaun The Sheep Movie, the Claymation flick by the guy who make the Wallace & Gromit series. It leans towards kids; I didn't think there were too many wink-wink in-jokes for adults to enjoy. But it was really charming and heart-warming. Every day feels like summer with you. ... The ticket was only five bucks for some reason; maybe because it's a kids' movie? Along with popcorn and pop and I spent: $9.
- Then I went (or maybe I went before the movie, fuck if I can remember) to the library to print some shit out. One was a coupon for Arby's that I wanted to print off my Hotmail account, and I should never do that again because printing Hotmail e-mails rarely work. The coupon's bar code was cut off at the bottom. Dammit -- why does this happen? Isn't there a Print feature that makes e-mails printer-friendly? More printing waste: 60 cents.
- Oh my fucking God, I'm still not done. On Monday, August 24 I went to Anelace for coffee. Saw on this date the price of coffee went up by a quarter. Why is coffee everywhere going up by a quarter??? With my tip of, I think, a quarter: $4.
- There was Monday Day Football in the EPL, so I went to the Nomad to watch. Used my credit card for parking, so the money I spent on a beer, with the discount and the tip, comes out to: $3.
- Goddamn, I'm still not fucking done with this thing!!! Sunday, August 23 -- Went to Hell's Kitchen because for the entire month of August they had this deal where you would get free parking and a free jar of peanut butter if you come in and eat an entree. The pancakes I had for Sunday Brunch was great, but I thought the jar of peanut butter would have kept a lot longer than it apparently has. Maybe I should go to downtown and see if I can swap it for a non-spoiled one. Or is it still good? Oh, who knows. Plus tip: $16.
- After that I went to the Golden Gopher soccer match, which I believe was a tie with Kansas. Hot dog, Coke, program: $9.25.
- Saturday the 22nd was the date of the Chipotle Cultivate festival. Stuffed my face with tostadas that I found at the corner of Loring Park that had a very short line, Cultivate beer that I also didn't need to wait long for, and a shot of Harriet West Side beer, which was really good. With tip: $16.
- After that I went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Version) for tips and Coke: $9.
- Friday, August 21 ... this was back when I was still looking for a place that would undent my car for as cheaply as possible. So on this day I went to the body shop that redid the hood on my old car. The owner said he could see me the next day. Oh, well. As long as I was there, and as long as I had my computer with me, I just stayed there and cooled my jets for a bit at the coffeeshop close by. May be one of the last times I ever go there; I don't think I'll be using the body shop anymore, and the mechanic that worked there seems to have closed up shop. Turtle mocha plus tip: $5.36.
- After that I went to the Minneapolis Institute of Art to look at the Codex Leicester, the scribble book that Leonardo di Vinci used to jot down his musings. Interesting, but the main drawback, of course, is that all of his writings were in a foreign language. Plus the price of admission was high -- $20?! Plus donation: $21.
- Afterward I hit Glam Doll Donuts because I hadn't been there in a while and I wanted their donuts. Plus tip: $5.
- Thursday the 20th ... Caribou. Plus cookie, tip: $6.
- Wednesday the 19th ... Caribou. Plus cookie, tip ... and I don't know why the amount is different. Must be a combination of getting just a basic mocha as opposed to a fancy one, and also getting the trivia question (and its 10-cent discount) right: $5.75.
- On Tuesday the 18th I went to see the fifth Mission: Impossible movie. It was good, but I really like Rebecca Ferguson, the babe in the movie. I don't know who the hell she is, but I still can't stop thinking about her. The best part of the movie is that she is a middle-aged agent that provided sex appeal and professionalism. She looks hot in a bikini and great in a dress, but she looked absolutely fucking sexy ... wearing a business suit. Ferguson was given a role of a woman in full, and she acted it, perfectly. Used my rewards free popcorn coupon for this, so ticket and pop was: $7.75.
- Monday, August 17: Dunn Bros. for coffee. With tip it comes to: $2.25.
- I then was able to snag a free parking spot at Cedar-Riverside, so I had a late lunch at The Wienery. They say they make the best hot dogs in town, and they were good. I just wish the place were a bit cleaner and the seats didn't wobble when you sit on them. Plus tip: $6.60.
- If I knew at the time I could have brought in the hot dog and fries to the Nomad to watch the soccer match, I would have. Whatever. Soccer match there. Got a Surly; no parking discount because I found parking on my own. With tip: $5.
- On Sunday the 16th I started my day with EPL soccer that morning at The Local. For the start of the season I was given (actually the person I saw Crystal Palace-West Bromwich Albion on October 3) a coupon for a free breakfast sandwich, which I used on this day. Got a Strongbow too, which are discounted for soccer matches. With tip: $6.50.
- After that I went to MIA for some art. Around this time I was attracted to three things: The Raphael painting that the museum borrowed from London's National Gallery; the "Myopia" exhibit from Mark Mothersbaugh, one of the members of Devo (that "Mutatum" Scion car with no front is still a mindfuck); and the "100 Photos For 100 Years" gallery celebrating a century of the institute. And all of that for a donation of just: $1.
- That evening (?) I went to Caffetto for an iced mocha. Plus tip: $5.25.
- Saturday the 15th ... only EWR was Dairy Queen: $3.20.
- Friday, August 14 -- Started off at Anelace. Probably got a mocha, because with tip I spent: $5.25.
- This week the English Premier League had a special Friday match, so I sauntered to the Nomad for a parking-discounted Surly. With tip: $3.
- Thursday the 13th ... Caribou. Plus cookie, tip: $6.
- Wednesday the 12th ... Caribou. Plus cookie, tip: $6.
- When I came home from "work" I needed to help my parents with printing out from their iPhones what they considered to be legitimate passport photos. It was kind of a pain, but at least Father compensated me for getting the photos for him once they were processed at Target, namely an Infusion of: $10.
- I had things I needed to do that evening, so after I dropped off Father at home (and promised him I'd bring the photos when I came back from my errands), I went to the library to print out forms. I had to print the one thing I needed to print out again. God, so much waste when it comes to printouts! And it was a long one, too: $3.20
- And then I went to Caffetto, where I just bought a North Star orange cola. With tip: $3.
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