So last (Friday) night represented the last of three days filling in for someone in my new department from 1:30 until 10 at night. And goddammit it, I'll miss it. A lot.
How will I miss it? Let me count the ways. Well, really, it's a bunch of things, some of them layered up against the next. But I should start with a contrast I noticed with my old department, one I always join on Saturdays. The interdependence of that job is driving me crazy. I am either dependent upon, or am depended on, for work in this particular position. And knowing that I'm in relatively close quarters is really pissing me off. For example, last Saturday, That Bitch (yeah, I'm calling her That Bitch again) was tired of me being so slow that she just started doing her own thing. That is not the protocol with this job. Last Saturday, she had to wait for me to give her work. If that isn't the process, if she can do whatever the hell she wants because I ain't fast enough for her, then what the fuck are we even tied to one another for? Why don't we all just do our own fucking thing? Pisses me the hell off -- her and the work.
But this department? Relatively stress-free. I have run into a bunch of things I've done wrong, and there are still a lot of things I have yet to master. But it doesn't feel as though I'm getting called on the carpet for it here as I am in my old dept. It helps, tremendously, that this new dept. is not interdependent on other people. We're just a bunch of folks doing our own thing, working at our own pace. Plus, this department isn't predicated on the work. It doesn't have to "go out" at the end of the day. It gets hectic, but there is no mandate, for example, where we have to stay until we get all the work pushed out. That drives down the stress, that's for sure.
And now I have to add the particulars of the past three days. In this department the employees' hours are staggered -- some leave at 3, some at 3:30, some at 5:30, etc. So when I get there at 1:30, some of the other people there have an eye towards what they're doing after work. (Don't get me wrong, though -- these people, almost to a person, are great, and I love talking with them. And they've been so patient with me as I ask questions, continuously and, sometimes, redundantly.) As people leave for the day, the department, which is a hell of a lot less hectic than my Saturday duties, get progressively quieter. And I got the added bonus these three days of a co-worker who was scheduled to work until 6:30 deciding to leave early -- 5:30 Wednesday and Thursday, 5 last night.
There is another room where a couple people came in to look for files or made copies. But for the back half of my shifts this week, I was all alone. And even though the entire campus is 24/7, it gets really quiet after the 9-to-5ers around my area leave. I had the entire department to myself -- no one to correct my mistakes, no one to check on my work, no one to look over my shoulder as I, uh, surfed the Internet, no one to notice that I was not filing papers and instead was going through my receipts, or eating even though I wasn't supposed to bring food in there.
I like working alone. I like being alone. I did do work, don't get me wrong. But with the run of the place, I felt no stress. I brought my satellite radio in to listen to music and sports during the evening (and it worked in this part of the building when it doesn't work at the old department; maybe being close to a window helps), and I turned it up because there were no co-workers I could bother. And I worked -- or not worked -- at my own pace. If I wanted to disappear into the warehouse to refile, I could. So long as the important tasks got done in a timely manner, I don't think I stuck out. And again, with a skeleton crew after first shift, there wasn't a whole lot of important tasks to do these past few days. (Thanks to Buddha, come to think of it, for the time of the season; work everywhere slowed down because we are in the working week between Christmas and New Year's, when not everybody works.)
Now, maybe I will get caught on my relative laziness. There were still papers to refile, for example, and maybe someone will question why I couldn't get around to those with all the time I had in the evening. The meager shift of workers came out to "lunch" to the break room just as I was taking my spaghetti/makeshift goulash into the department. Maybe someone will say something to someone about illegally eating at my desk. And I just remembered that I forgot to open the blinds I closed after everyone left. Someone will notice; will whoever notices stir shit with me?
But if all of those fears is just paranoia, that meant that I was able to do whatever the hell I wanted (after working some, of course) and got paid for it. And I was left to be in my own cocoon, to boot. Being able to do relatively easy work in a giant safe space with no one else around? I am jealous of the person I was filling in for. Heck, I wouldn't mind subbing for her again. Maybe even taking over her position in the future. (That might create a kink in the schedule with my parents, but who cares?)
Oh, and it was fun to go to work in the afternoon. I needed to get one of my car's tires patched, and I could get it done Wednesday morning. I could go and see Grandmother's friend late Thursday morning. And I could have my sister-in-law's leftover prime rib and green beans for lunch yesterday/Friday. I had to get up at 7 in order to get the tire patched because I wanted to go to downtown Minneapolis and catch the Boxing Day EPL matches. All of those things -- the tire patching, watching soccer, seeing Grandmother's friend, having lunch at home -- all of those things I wouldn't be able to do on my usual schedule. Plus, at least for Thursday and yesterday, I could listen to my body tell me when it was ready to wake up. Woke up at around 9 Thursday and around 10 yesterday, and I woke up not to the sound of an alarm. My daily work schedule leaves my afternoons free. But for the past three days I felt so refreshed and didn't feel shitty about waking up at a time violently against my circadian rhythms.
That old schedule is coming back, of course. I'll be cursing everyone when I get up at 5:30, and I'll need that power nap for lunch to get through the rest of the day. Plus I will have (or at least feel) the scrutiny of other people around me, even though they aren't watching over my shoulder or jumping down my throat. So I need to put on the record just how much I truly, truly loved working this second shift the past three days. I miss it already.
How will I miss it? Let me count the ways. Well, really, it's a bunch of things, some of them layered up against the next. But I should start with a contrast I noticed with my old department, one I always join on Saturdays. The interdependence of that job is driving me crazy. I am either dependent upon, or am depended on, for work in this particular position. And knowing that I'm in relatively close quarters is really pissing me off. For example, last Saturday, That Bitch (yeah, I'm calling her That Bitch again) was tired of me being so slow that she just started doing her own thing. That is not the protocol with this job. Last Saturday, she had to wait for me to give her work. If that isn't the process, if she can do whatever the hell she wants because I ain't fast enough for her, then what the fuck are we even tied to one another for? Why don't we all just do our own fucking thing? Pisses me the hell off -- her and the work.
But this department? Relatively stress-free. I have run into a bunch of things I've done wrong, and there are still a lot of things I have yet to master. But it doesn't feel as though I'm getting called on the carpet for it here as I am in my old dept. It helps, tremendously, that this new dept. is not interdependent on other people. We're just a bunch of folks doing our own thing, working at our own pace. Plus, this department isn't predicated on the work. It doesn't have to "go out" at the end of the day. It gets hectic, but there is no mandate, for example, where we have to stay until we get all the work pushed out. That drives down the stress, that's for sure.
And now I have to add the particulars of the past three days. In this department the employees' hours are staggered -- some leave at 3, some at 3:30, some at 5:30, etc. So when I get there at 1:30, some of the other people there have an eye towards what they're doing after work. (Don't get me wrong, though -- these people, almost to a person, are great, and I love talking with them. And they've been so patient with me as I ask questions, continuously and, sometimes, redundantly.) As people leave for the day, the department, which is a hell of a lot less hectic than my Saturday duties, get progressively quieter. And I got the added bonus these three days of a co-worker who was scheduled to work until 6:30 deciding to leave early -- 5:30 Wednesday and Thursday, 5 last night.
There is another room where a couple people came in to look for files or made copies. But for the back half of my shifts this week, I was all alone. And even though the entire campus is 24/7, it gets really quiet after the 9-to-5ers around my area leave. I had the entire department to myself -- no one to correct my mistakes, no one to check on my work, no one to look over my shoulder as I, uh, surfed the Internet, no one to notice that I was not filing papers and instead was going through my receipts, or eating even though I wasn't supposed to bring food in there.
I like working alone. I like being alone. I did do work, don't get me wrong. But with the run of the place, I felt no stress. I brought my satellite radio in to listen to music and sports during the evening (and it worked in this part of the building when it doesn't work at the old department; maybe being close to a window helps), and I turned it up because there were no co-workers I could bother. And I worked -- or not worked -- at my own pace. If I wanted to disappear into the warehouse to refile, I could. So long as the important tasks got done in a timely manner, I don't think I stuck out. And again, with a skeleton crew after first shift, there wasn't a whole lot of important tasks to do these past few days. (Thanks to Buddha, come to think of it, for the time of the season; work everywhere slowed down because we are in the working week between Christmas and New Year's, when not everybody works.)
Now, maybe I will get caught on my relative laziness. There were still papers to refile, for example, and maybe someone will question why I couldn't get around to those with all the time I had in the evening. The meager shift of workers came out to "lunch" to the break room just as I was taking my spaghetti/makeshift goulash into the department. Maybe someone will say something to someone about illegally eating at my desk. And I just remembered that I forgot to open the blinds I closed after everyone left. Someone will notice; will whoever notices stir shit with me?
But if all of those fears is just paranoia, that meant that I was able to do whatever the hell I wanted (after working some, of course) and got paid for it. And I was left to be in my own cocoon, to boot. Being able to do relatively easy work in a giant safe space with no one else around? I am jealous of the person I was filling in for. Heck, I wouldn't mind subbing for her again. Maybe even taking over her position in the future. (That might create a kink in the schedule with my parents, but who cares?)
Oh, and it was fun to go to work in the afternoon. I needed to get one of my car's tires patched, and I could get it done Wednesday morning. I could go and see Grandmother's friend late Thursday morning. And I could have my sister-in-law's leftover prime rib and green beans for lunch yesterday/Friday. I had to get up at 7 in order to get the tire patched because I wanted to go to downtown Minneapolis and catch the Boxing Day EPL matches. All of those things -- the tire patching, watching soccer, seeing Grandmother's friend, having lunch at home -- all of those things I wouldn't be able to do on my usual schedule. Plus, at least for Thursday and yesterday, I could listen to my body tell me when it was ready to wake up. Woke up at around 9 Thursday and around 10 yesterday, and I woke up not to the sound of an alarm. My daily work schedule leaves my afternoons free. But for the past three days I felt so refreshed and didn't feel shitty about waking up at a time violently against my circadian rhythms.
That old schedule is coming back, of course. I'll be cursing everyone when I get up at 5:30, and I'll need that power nap for lunch to get through the rest of the day. Plus I will have (or at least feel) the scrutiny of other people around me, even though they aren't watching over my shoulder or jumping down my throat. So I need to put on the record just how much I truly, truly loved working this second shift the past three days. I miss it already.
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