#-1: Gopher women's basketball (Last Week: -1). In a sleepy screening week on the campus at the U. (leading to a relatively short WMNSS, thank Jesus!), the Gopher women b-ball team finished running the table on their non-con sked Saturday afternoon with a 91-71 rout of Rhode Island at Williams. Lindsay Whalen, a great player who has not coached a lick on any level of basketball before, somehow has her alma mater at 11-0 and in the Top 15 of the polls. It's almost too good to be true. And, frankly, we will see how much of that undefeated record is signal and how much is noise now that we finally dive into B1G play, as the Gophers host Wisconsin Friday night.
#-2: Gopher men's basketball (Last Week: -2). Meanwhile, the male ballers pulled away from North Carolina A&T in a bodybag game at the Barn Friday, 86-67. They have played a tougher schedule than the women, but they have two blowout losses that give me pause. This club finishes their non-con Sunday afternoon at home vs. Mount St. Mary's.
#-3: Timberwolves (Last Week: -5). 2-2 for the week. Started it off by destroying Sacramento at home, but then on Wednesday (also at Target) they blew a sizable lead late, then lost in Overtime to Detroit. They promptly got throttled by the Spurs in San Antonio Friday. But in what might be their most thrilling game yet this season, they outlasted The Bastard Seattle SuperSonics Sunday in Oklahoma City, 114-112. (ETA on 1:56 a.m. Christmas Eve that this is the first road victory for the Woofie Dogs against a Western Conference foe.) (ET also A on 2:53 a.m. Christmas Eve that Andrew Wiggins sank the game-winning bucket.) Looks as though they have enough pride to redouble their efforts in the wake of an embarrassing loss. They sit third from the bottom in the Western Conference, but wins are good, you know?
This week: At Chicago Boxing Night, home to Atlanta Friday, then in Miami Sunday.
#-4: Vikings (Last Week: -4). Sure, they won against the Lions in Detroit yesterday/Sunday, maintaining control of their own destiny. But I'll say it right now: They won't make the playoffs.
First of all, if you saw the beginning of the game (and I heard most of it on the radio), the offense was absolute shit for the first, oh, 22-3 minutes. They didn't really pull away, even with the miraculous Hail Mary Kirk Cousins threw to Kyle Rudolph just before Halftime. They still look like they have major deficiencies, on both sides of the ball, that a playoff team easily will exploit.
Finally, you have to look at the now sole opponent for the final playoff slot in the National Football Conference. The Philadelphia Eagles won a back-and-forth contest vs. Houston at Lincoln Financial, despite Deshaun Watson somehow avoiding getting sacked and completing a pass that led to a go-ahead Touchdown. The Eagles came back to win because of fucking Saint Nick Foles who, by all rights and signs of a team regaining steam (again), seems destined to be the starting Quarterback of the Eagles over two-year vet Carson Wentz. The Eagles travel to Washington this weekend. Meanwhile, the Vikes on Sunday host a Chicago Bears team that is fighting for a first-round bye. If a Bears club has the motivation to win, they will win. Have very little doubt of that in my mind.
That's why it was important for the Texans to pull out the win. And it may be even more important to believe that Daniel Carlson is the reason the Vikes are in this fucked-up position. If he had made one Field Goal to defeat the Green Bay Packers in Week 2, they would be 9-6 instead of 8-6-1. The Eagles are right now 8-7. Remember also that Minnesota defeated Philadelphia earlier in the year, thus gaining the tiebreaker. Which means that if they had beaten the Pack, yesterday's/Sunday's win over the Lions would have clinched a playoff spot for them.
These are just too many woulda-coulda-shouldas for this cursed team to overcome. I dread to see and hear the scene from the stadium once the Vikings go down, a season with so many expectations going up in smoke.
#-5: Wild (Last Week: -3). Oh, fuck. Went winless this past screening week -- including losing at home to The Bastard North Stars -- and that means they have extended their losing streak to four games. I have a feeling that if this weren't Christmas, Bruce Boudreau would have been fired. The only saving grace is that the Mild is only two Points out of the final spot in the West. But these fuckers can't score.
Maybe having four days off will help. They return to action for games Thursday and Saturday, but both contests are on the road (Chicago and Winnipeg, respectively).
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