The Hottest Babe In The Hooters Calendar: July 2024

Afraid to say that this month is disappointing.  Could be one of the worst I've ever seen.  Of the dozen women featured in July '24, only three pop, and frankly, I've seen better and hotter.

Of the three, I initially considered them to be so equal in quality that I was going to say all three are tied.  Upon further reflection, I think I am able to stratify them.  That being said, if I were doing this list 24 hours from now, I could change my mind.

So, in third place is Cassidy, the Main Girl, hailing out of Grand Prairie, Texas.  She has long, wavy dark brown hair and is wearing a blue two-piece whose top criss-crosses.  She seems rather tiny, but she has a broad smile and, very important, is standing directly to the camera, so you get to see her tight body in all its glory.

In second place is Madison, of Wilmington, N. C.  Straight dark blonde hair; she's sporting a dark blue two-piece bikini with two strands wrapping around the top of her rib cage.  Her breasts are on the small side, but I love her hands-on-hips pose.  It puts her in a confident, even dominating position, as if she's saying, "Fuck yeah I'm hot -- worship me!"  And I do!

Finally, in first place is Orlando's Portia.  She has straight, dark blonde hair and is wearing a stars-and-stripes bikini which technically is a one-piece but has a huge circular hole in the middle that shows off her flat stomach.  She is posing at an angle, so you can tell that her tits are big and, probably, fake.  No matter; she's gorgeous, and because she is posing with her heads on top of her head, she gives off a sultry vibe.  I remember seeing her before -- not just in the pages of previous calendars (that's a given), but I swear I actually had her as a waitress when I ate at a Hooters.  She works in Orlando, but I haven't been in Orlando, and in fact in Florida, in at least a decade, if not more than that.  You know, is she originally from St. Louis?  I recollect going to a Hooters in the STL area and getting served by this goddess named Portia.  That must be her!  If that's the case, she has to be my #1!

You know, I think because of Portia, this month might not be as bad as I have made it out to be.  I have already masturbated to this month.  Twice in fact, because I jerked off again to this month in case I misremembered jerking off before.  So I'm covered there.  Anyway, thanks to Portia, and also to Madison and Cassidy.  Appreciate it!