All I did was note that you made a mistake. You fucked up. We all do it from time to time. Hell, I do it and I've been doing this for three seasons. I needed to note this because 1) people down the line are getting mistakes that were made from your end; 2) this was a relative simple mistake to make; and 3) it's my job to ensure you don't do it again.
So when I ask why two shots were posted to the same point, I think you can come up with a better, more grown-up response, than "But that was weeks ago!"
WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!?!?! WHAT IN THE FUCK IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!?!?! WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?? DON'T COP THAT ATTITUDE TO ME, BITCH! WHAT, JUST BECAUSE IT HAPPENED TWO WEEKS AGO MEANS YOU'RE NOT RESPONSIBLE?? YOU'RE NOT GONNA TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR FUCK-UP?? FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING BRAT!!! YOUR GODDAMN INITIALS ARE ALL OVER THAT!!! AND I DON'T GIVE A GOOD GODDAMN THAT IT WAS TWO WEEKS AGO, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO MAKE THAT MISTAKE! AND SPEAKING OF MISTAKES, DIDN'T WANNA BREAK IT TO YA, BABE, BUT I'VE BEEN CORRECTING YOUR SHIT THE PAST TWO DAYS. WRONG CODES, WRONG DATES, TYPICAL ERRORS OF SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T GIVE A SHIT. THAT'S YOU, HONEY, THAT'S YOU. AND I NEED TO CALL YOU OUT ON IT, AND I DON'T CARE IF YOU DON'T WANNA HEAR IT. GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK WITH YOUR PETTY AND JUVENILE, "BUT THAT WAS TWO WEEKS AGO!" MY GOD, YOU SHOULD BE SO FUCKING FIRED, DISRESPECTFUL CUNT.
God, I hate that woman.
---
Oh, in the afternoon, when my boss came around to our area, the two oldest temps were mouthing something to them. After that I saw my boss look at the envelopes. "They're saying that the packets are being put in the wrong place," he said, while looking at the packets to see if they're in the right boxes.
I put the envelopes in the boxes. It's my job. And now I'm being challenged on whether or not I can put some envelopes in the right fucking boxes. Oh, that's rich. I'm getting complaints (third-hand, by the way) by the fucking Hipster Twins, who don't say anything to anybody else but love to spend all day with each other talking about how they're so much better than everyone else.
I separate the envelopes by format. There are four of them. I then arrange each of the four piles chronologically because the oldest packets need to be done first. I think I do a good job. The other temps, well, I think they're being lazy and not noticing which packet is which format.
You know, I think this is why we should not have separated the four boxes. Let's just have one big box where we arranged all the envelopes, oldest to newest. That way, the person taking the packet has to note which format it is and adjust his or her settings accordingly. The way it is now, I think some of the temps are just forgetting to look at the front of the envelope, or are forgetting that they've switched formats, or some of them are putting them back in the wrong place.
What is not happening is me putting them in the wrong places. I'm not, assholes. I'm way smarter than that, and I am a hell of a lot smarter than you two are giving me credit for. My goodness, you think I'm prone to more mistakes than the other temps. Look at the them, what the fuck. ...
Oh well, at least my boss gave me a vote of confidence. Hope that's more binding than those given to head coaches before they're fired. I don't think I should be undermined by these disrespectful pricks.
Tuesday, September 30, 2014
Strippers Demanding More Money Again (Scheduled Post)
I've noticed more and more that the girls at My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Version) have been asking for five bucks more often. Some of them are new, and some of them have just given me new attitudes. I don't know what is the cause of this annoying new upsell, but it's both pissing me off and troubling me.
The only cause of this is actually a good thing. Last week when I went to the bar I noticed that they repaved the entire parking lot. Before it was pocked with holes and gravel, but they put down new asphalt and it's all smooth and it looks good. That shows that the owner of the place continues to invest in the bar, which means he cares, which means he is not going to sell the place anytime soon. (There have been many rumors that he's going to quit and give up the land the bar's on; the area around it is gentrifying and the liquor license is a prime asset for someone who wants to make money in the city of Minneapolis.) That is awesome.
Unfortunately, I think that led the owner to tell the dancers that they are going to charge them more in house fees to work there. That in turn makes them demand five bucks from customers instead of just two. And I love this place, mean it, but fuck that. I've been going here too long to be bullied into frittering away more money. Hell, the first time I came in it was an adjustment going from one buck to two, but I did it -- I think I compromised enough.
And another thing: I think that I'm the only guy there who regularly tips during visits. Most of the other guys are just sitting around, drinking and eating Heggies Pizza, talking to the strippers after they got done with their shift. I think I should get a lot of credit for giving money since no one else is doing it. Shit, if they're going to get all uppity about the amount of money I tip, maybe I won't tip any money. Maybe I'll just treat the place like a regular bar, where I'll go and have a beer and watch sports on the TV. I'll just be like 90% of the guys at the place, not giving a rat's ass about the strippers. I wouldn't be giving them any money then. Would they like that instead?
OK, here's the deal: I will continue to give two bucks a pop. If you don't like it, fine, I'll put you down on my "five-dollar list" and never tip you again. But if you do accept my two dollars (and don't say some shit like, "Do you want to give me five for a better show?") there's a chance, a good chance, that you'll get a $20 dance from me. Now that's down the line -- I'm not made out of money. But that's the deal: I'll give you $2 with a chance to make $20, but if you demand $5 you'll get $0. Are we clear?
I hope that there's going to be some pushback on this. I still have my die-hard ATFs, and they're not giving me shit about two bucks. But if other strippers continue to demand fives at a time, or if those ATFs start getting bitchy with me about the money I'm voluntarily giving them ... well, shudder to think that I won't be welcome there anymore.
The only cause of this is actually a good thing. Last week when I went to the bar I noticed that they repaved the entire parking lot. Before it was pocked with holes and gravel, but they put down new asphalt and it's all smooth and it looks good. That shows that the owner of the place continues to invest in the bar, which means he cares, which means he is not going to sell the place anytime soon. (There have been many rumors that he's going to quit and give up the land the bar's on; the area around it is gentrifying and the liquor license is a prime asset for someone who wants to make money in the city of Minneapolis.) That is awesome.
Unfortunately, I think that led the owner to tell the dancers that they are going to charge them more in house fees to work there. That in turn makes them demand five bucks from customers instead of just two. And I love this place, mean it, but fuck that. I've been going here too long to be bullied into frittering away more money. Hell, the first time I came in it was an adjustment going from one buck to two, but I did it -- I think I compromised enough.
And another thing: I think that I'm the only guy there who regularly tips during visits. Most of the other guys are just sitting around, drinking and eating Heggies Pizza, talking to the strippers after they got done with their shift. I think I should get a lot of credit for giving money since no one else is doing it. Shit, if they're going to get all uppity about the amount of money I tip, maybe I won't tip any money. Maybe I'll just treat the place like a regular bar, where I'll go and have a beer and watch sports on the TV. I'll just be like 90% of the guys at the place, not giving a rat's ass about the strippers. I wouldn't be giving them any money then. Would they like that instead?
OK, here's the deal: I will continue to give two bucks a pop. If you don't like it, fine, I'll put you down on my "five-dollar list" and never tip you again. But if you do accept my two dollars (and don't say some shit like, "Do you want to give me five for a better show?") there's a chance, a good chance, that you'll get a $20 dance from me. Now that's down the line -- I'm not made out of money. But that's the deal: I'll give you $2 with a chance to make $20, but if you demand $5 you'll get $0. Are we clear?
I hope that there's going to be some pushback on this. I still have my die-hard ATFs, and they're not giving me shit about two bucks. But if other strippers continue to demand fives at a time, or if those ATFs start getting bitchy with me about the money I'm voluntarily giving them ... well, shudder to think that I won't be welcome there anymore.
Monday, September 29, 2014
But I'm Giving You A Compliment!
So on Facebook one of my "friends" (actually a hot chick who does bodybuilding -- yeah, I befriend fitness babes on Facebook because I got a fetish, OK?) said that she was horribly mocked by someone on the site, saying she looked disgusting and not feminine. (She is not, not by a goddamn long shot.) As you would guess, all of her fans swarmed to her comfort and defense, saying you're not ugly, that person is a jealous cunt, blah-blah-blah.
I joined in because I secretly hope that she'll remember my comment, fly over to Minnesota and fuck me, so I said that that comment was disgusting and classless. Because it was, right?
Also as per usual, whenever people make comments on your status update, you just hit "like" and shotgun them down the line. So I get an update that there was an update on her status update. And there have been dozens of messages since I wrote. And she liked every single one of them ... except mine.
What the fuck? Why did she like everybody else's comment but not mine? She liked every comment before mine, and she liked every comment after mine, but she didn't like mine! Why? My comment is just as good as anyone else's. In fact, it's better than anyone else's! I was giving her a compliment, and she doesn't like it? And she doesn't like me?
I don't understand the rejection. It's unfair.
I joined in because I secretly hope that she'll remember my comment, fly over to Minnesota and fuck me, so I said that that comment was disgusting and classless. Because it was, right?
Also as per usual, whenever people make comments on your status update, you just hit "like" and shotgun them down the line. So I get an update that there was an update on her status update. And there have been dozens of messages since I wrote. And she liked every single one of them ... except mine.
What the fuck? Why did she like everybody else's comment but not mine? She liked every comment before mine, and she liked every comment after mine, but she didn't like mine! Why? My comment is just as good as anyone else's. In fact, it's better than anyone else's! I was giving her a compliment, and she doesn't like it? And she doesn't like me?
I don't understand the rejection. It's unfair.
Bent License Plate
Got gas for my car tonight (Sunday night) to take advantage of a coupon. I was going around my car just because I always check for stuff, and I see that the left side of my license plate is bent 90 degrees. What the fuck? It was as if someone tried to pry it loose so they could take it and use it? Why the hell would someone steal a license plate?
I tried all I could to smooth it out. But that's hard to do if the back of the plate is on a frame. I would need to eliminate the crease by folding it the other way, and I can't do that if it's bolted onto the car. So I did the best I could. Right now, the license plate is bending at, oh, 45 degrees.
Assuming that the bend would catch my eye, it happened some time after the last time I looked at the front of my car, which is when I parked it Sunday morning before heading off to the Vikings game. So some asshole at Dinkytown, or at My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Division), where I stopped by after working the game, bent down and tried to steal my plate? Goddammit, this world is filled with assholes!
I tried all I could to smooth it out. But that's hard to do if the back of the plate is on a frame. I would need to eliminate the crease by folding it the other way, and I can't do that if it's bolted onto the car. So I did the best I could. Right now, the license plate is bending at, oh, 45 degrees.
Assuming that the bend would catch my eye, it happened some time after the last time I looked at the front of my car, which is when I parked it Sunday morning before heading off to the Vikings game. So some asshole at Dinkytown, or at My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Division), where I stopped by after working the game, bent down and tried to steal my plate? Goddammit, this world is filled with assholes!
Sunday, September 28, 2014
Saturday, September 27, 2014
Are They Going To Rat Me Out?
So my boss said on Friday that next week he is going to hang out with us so he could answer questions from the temps so I could be free to finally start billing these flu shots. He has said that all week and didn't because he's busy. I think he is doing the work of two people, and there should be a second IT person to take very important things off of his plate. But apparently this flu billing is now his priority, so I guess he's going to be physically with us next week.
That is bad for a couple reasons. I feel as if the group works looser (not necessarily faster or better, just looser) without his physical presence. More importantly, though, relates to something another person approached me with Friday morning.
I was busy cleaning up one of the temp's mistakes when a worker came back to our corner. She's collected the money, a thankless task I did back in the spring when my boss got let go. Not fun. And she just got yelled at by some asshole because one of us didn't change the insurance information. It got to the point where this piece of shit actually said to her, "What is wrong with you?" I want to know the name of this guy so I can charge that prick double for his shot. Customer service is bad these days, but this raging motherfucker certainly is part of the problem.
I am in charge of my people, all seven of them. So I don't know how in the hell one of these guys (or one of the people who has since been fired for not being up to snuff) didn't change insurance companies and update the information. But then I thought up something that I may have taught them: If there is the same information as last year, and if an insurance company paid last year, go with that same insurance info. It makes things easier, and sometimes we make things worse by changing insurances.
But that is only in cases where 1) there is more than one insurance company covering the person getting the shot and 2), obviously, there is no new information. If the form gives you something different, of course you put that in, and of course it should be the insurance company you bill. Who would be lazy and/or stupid not to do that? Did I ever tell one of them otherwise? And that's where I get really scared: I thought it was obvious that you enter any new information you see on the consent and assume it's that person's insurance, so I have not explicitly said to.
That makes me think that I confused someone. I told them that even though the insurance tells them that they have this insurance, just go with what happened last year. That doesn't mean ignore everything the sheet says. Like this worker who get yelled at by that asshole, people change insurance all the time. People get information wrong, but at the very least we can say that they put down this insurance information; if that insurance company says it is not responsible, then we can just tell the person who got the shot, "Well, you put down this number, so that's why we billed this company." Although that makes getting the money for the shot harder and longer to take, they can't do anything about it because it's their fault.
That doesn't mean you can just ignore the information because there's a possibility they know what they're talking about! I'm afraid that one of them thought that "going with what happened last year" meant that they didn't have to update insurance information because we're going on last year's information -- and, worse than that, they're going to say that I told them they can do that. No, I didn't! What I meant to say was ... and then I'll tie my tongue because I don't exactly know what I said, and then I'll look guilty, and stupid, and being perceived as dumb in front of people who are below me is one of my worst fears.
And that is the downside to my boss hanging out with us next week. I had some freedom telling them what needs to be done and generally doing things my way. But with him being the person answering my questions (which, I have to say, allows me to do other things I have been waiting to do because I've been training so much) I know one of them will ask something about, "Well, they have these insurances in the system, so can I just ignore what it says here?" and my boss will say "Hell no!" and then he or she will go, "But he said we're supposed to do that!" Or, this lady who told me this Friday morning could have it happen again on Monday, she'll tell my boss, my boss will make an announcement, and then one of the temps will go, "Well I've been told that you should go with what it says on the computer!" And then he'll yell at me, and then I'll have to defend myself and yell back at him, and then I'll be fired because I got undermined by one of these motherfucking temps.
Every time I wake up during the week my first thought is, "Goddammit, I don't want to go to work today." I really don't want to go to work Monday.
That is bad for a couple reasons. I feel as if the group works looser (not necessarily faster or better, just looser) without his physical presence. More importantly, though, relates to something another person approached me with Friday morning.
I was busy cleaning up one of the temp's mistakes when a worker came back to our corner. She's collected the money, a thankless task I did back in the spring when my boss got let go. Not fun. And she just got yelled at by some asshole because one of us didn't change the insurance information. It got to the point where this piece of shit actually said to her, "What is wrong with you?" I want to know the name of this guy so I can charge that prick double for his shot. Customer service is bad these days, but this raging motherfucker certainly is part of the problem.
I am in charge of my people, all seven of them. So I don't know how in the hell one of these guys (or one of the people who has since been fired for not being up to snuff) didn't change insurance companies and update the information. But then I thought up something that I may have taught them: If there is the same information as last year, and if an insurance company paid last year, go with that same insurance info. It makes things easier, and sometimes we make things worse by changing insurances.
But that is only in cases where 1) there is more than one insurance company covering the person getting the shot and 2), obviously, there is no new information. If the form gives you something different, of course you put that in, and of course it should be the insurance company you bill. Who would be lazy and/or stupid not to do that? Did I ever tell one of them otherwise? And that's where I get really scared: I thought it was obvious that you enter any new information you see on the consent and assume it's that person's insurance, so I have not explicitly said to.
That makes me think that I confused someone. I told them that even though the insurance tells them that they have this insurance, just go with what happened last year. That doesn't mean ignore everything the sheet says. Like this worker who get yelled at by that asshole, people change insurance all the time. People get information wrong, but at the very least we can say that they put down this insurance information; if that insurance company says it is not responsible, then we can just tell the person who got the shot, "Well, you put down this number, so that's why we billed this company." Although that makes getting the money for the shot harder and longer to take, they can't do anything about it because it's their fault.
That doesn't mean you can just ignore the information because there's a possibility they know what they're talking about! I'm afraid that one of them thought that "going with what happened last year" meant that they didn't have to update insurance information because we're going on last year's information -- and, worse than that, they're going to say that I told them they can do that. No, I didn't! What I meant to say was ... and then I'll tie my tongue because I don't exactly know what I said, and then I'll look guilty, and stupid, and being perceived as dumb in front of people who are below me is one of my worst fears.
And that is the downside to my boss hanging out with us next week. I had some freedom telling them what needs to be done and generally doing things my way. But with him being the person answering my questions (which, I have to say, allows me to do other things I have been waiting to do because I've been training so much) I know one of them will ask something about, "Well, they have these insurances in the system, so can I just ignore what it says here?" and my boss will say "Hell no!" and then he or she will go, "But he said we're supposed to do that!" Or, this lady who told me this Friday morning could have it happen again on Monday, she'll tell my boss, my boss will make an announcement, and then one of the temps will go, "Well I've been told that you should go with what it says on the computer!" And then he'll yell at me, and then I'll have to defend myself and yell back at him, and then I'll be fired because I got undermined by one of these motherfucking temps.
Every time I wake up during the week my first thought is, "Goddammit, I don't want to go to work today." I really don't want to go to work Monday.
Friday, September 26, 2014
JUST GIVE THEM THE GODDAMN REPORTS!!!
OK, this is a dereliction of duty, in my informed opinion. For the past 1 1/2 days these two guys I've been training have had to use my computer to print out reports, even though they should have them on their own computers. That wastes their time as I have had to load up the reports for them, and also ties me up because I could instead be working on my own stuff on my own computer instead of making sure they're still working by pushing their stuff along. There was a point Thursday morning where each of them was using the accounts of two of the guys were fired (including the one who blew up at me Wednesday), but by noontime or so they were closed down.
And the guy who closed those fired guys' accounts is also the person who my boss said would give these two people access to the reports on their own. And he's The Asshole.
So I may be overreacting, or maybe even wrong, but seriously, this inability for these two to do work on their own and have to bother me to get their shit going is really starting to piss me off. I can't get to work, and neither can they. Meanwhile I told my boss on Monday -- Monday! -- that these two couldn't get on, and for some fucking reason they still can't get on. It's possible he hasn't told The Asshole. But for the sake of my sanity I am going to project my hate towards him through a belief that he already did tell him (my boss is The Asshole's boss) to put access on those two computers and he just done it -- not just because he's busy, but also because he hates me and disregards everything I'm there to do.
If that's the case, my perception of him as a guy who talks tough about getting things done, only to be revealed as someone who doesn't really give a shit is 100% true. The last time I saw this dick he was carrying what looked like his lunch to the break room. Hey, we have people who can't run reports here, where the fuck are you?! All he seems to care about is himself -- not even his work, himself. And if that is true, my fear of him suddenly abates. Why the hell should I be scared of some shiftless old fart? I was hired to make sure this company gets paid for flu shots, and I think I'm doing a hell of a better job than he is. I and the other temps can't work as well as we're asked to because this prick wants to eat instead?!?! Fuck this guy and his five fucking minutes! I will not be disrespected by some loafing piece of shit who can't spend those five goddamn minutes loading up reports -- reports, by the way, he should have been able to put up before these guys started.
My fear of this guy is quickly turning into unadulterated, justified hate. These guys damn well better be able to load up reports on their own today. I don't give a shit if we're temps, we're owed the ability to do what we need to do in order to work.
And the guy who closed those fired guys' accounts is also the person who my boss said would give these two people access to the reports on their own. And he's The Asshole.
So I may be overreacting, or maybe even wrong, but seriously, this inability for these two to do work on their own and have to bother me to get their shit going is really starting to piss me off. I can't get to work, and neither can they. Meanwhile I told my boss on Monday -- Monday! -- that these two couldn't get on, and for some fucking reason they still can't get on. It's possible he hasn't told The Asshole. But for the sake of my sanity I am going to project my hate towards him through a belief that he already did tell him (my boss is The Asshole's boss) to put access on those two computers and he just done it -- not just because he's busy, but also because he hates me and disregards everything I'm there to do.
If that's the case, my perception of him as a guy who talks tough about getting things done, only to be revealed as someone who doesn't really give a shit is 100% true. The last time I saw this dick he was carrying what looked like his lunch to the break room. Hey, we have people who can't run reports here, where the fuck are you?! All he seems to care about is himself -- not even his work, himself. And if that is true, my fear of him suddenly abates. Why the hell should I be scared of some shiftless old fart? I was hired to make sure this company gets paid for flu shots, and I think I'm doing a hell of a better job than he is. I and the other temps can't work as well as we're asked to because this prick wants to eat instead?!?! Fuck this guy and his five fucking minutes! I will not be disrespected by some loafing piece of shit who can't spend those five goddamn minutes loading up reports -- reports, by the way, he should have been able to put up before these guys started.
My fear of this guy is quickly turning into unadulterated, justified hate. These guys damn well better be able to load up reports on their own today. I don't give a shit if we're temps, we're owed the ability to do what we need to do in order to work.
Thursday, September 25, 2014
The Stress Is Getting To All Of Us
Yeah, I've been through three waves of people, but it's only this one where I could feel a full day of tension. I have to admit, however, that it came mostly from one guy -- who, after I had to stop him because he skipped some steps and again after I corrected his codes, kind of blew up yesterday (Wednesday) afternoon at me. My cortisol was running real high after he got frustrated, but I have to admit I have been there, many times, at this job, all three seasons, including this one.
In the afternoon, after taking a few moments to himself, he calmed down and apologized, which was really nice and lowered my temperature. His only complaint was that he was told the training would be different from what I actually did. He was told this from a contact at the temp agency who I find strange. In fact, if I may be so bold, I don't think she knows what she's talking about.
Before he left he said that he was told, but this same contact, that as long as he shows improvement, he'll stick around. I do not believe that to be the case, and I am afraid that he is putting his faith in something who cannot be trusted. In other words, I don't know if I'm going to be seeing him this morning.
---
I was walking back and forth watching the new crop when I heard an, "Excuse me." It's the guy from the first wave, charging through the hallway like a bull with headphones on, and I was in the way. "Oh, sorry," I said, and I waved him through.
You know, underneath his short hair, bulbous head, bulbous figure, gruff exterior and the obnoxious way he talks only to the other person from the first wave to survive at work like a cross between an elementary school gossip and an ironic hipster, there beats a heart of a man who thinks he's better than me.
---
I do not know if I trained them well, or correctly. I still have one thing left for them to teach. I don't know why I haven't taught them till now, but it's gotten to the point where that box is about to burst and its oldest envelopes are a week older than the other formats.
The downside is that that will take training, again, and that will take time, of course. And if these people don't get it, there's a chance that they'll be confused even more than they already are. But if they get this, that'll unlock a key, and zoom will go their production.
I just don't know if that's the right thing to do. Damn, this job is so hard.
In the afternoon, after taking a few moments to himself, he calmed down and apologized, which was really nice and lowered my temperature. His only complaint was that he was told the training would be different from what I actually did. He was told this from a contact at the temp agency who I find strange. In fact, if I may be so bold, I don't think she knows what she's talking about.
Before he left he said that he was told, but this same contact, that as long as he shows improvement, he'll stick around. I do not believe that to be the case, and I am afraid that he is putting his faith in something who cannot be trusted. In other words, I don't know if I'm going to be seeing him this morning.
---
I was walking back and forth watching the new crop when I heard an, "Excuse me." It's the guy from the first wave, charging through the hallway like a bull with headphones on, and I was in the way. "Oh, sorry," I said, and I waved him through.
You know, underneath his short hair, bulbous head, bulbous figure, gruff exterior and the obnoxious way he talks only to the other person from the first wave to survive at work like a cross between an elementary school gossip and an ironic hipster, there beats a heart of a man who thinks he's better than me.
---
I do not know if I trained them well, or correctly. I still have one thing left for them to teach. I don't know why I haven't taught them till now, but it's gotten to the point where that box is about to burst and its oldest envelopes are a week older than the other formats.
The downside is that that will take training, again, and that will take time, of course. And if these people don't get it, there's a chance that they'll be confused even more than they already are. But if they get this, that'll unlock a key, and zoom will go their production.
I just don't know if that's the right thing to do. Damn, this job is so hard.
Wednesday, September 24, 2014
The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey
#-1: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: -1). OK, I was wrong: The Minnesota volleyball team was able to sweep all three games (Duquesne, host Toledo and IPFW) at the Toledo Tournament. I don't know if this means that the club has turned things around or finally found the key to banish their early season struggles, but I expect them to crush low-major programs like the three above, and although I would've hoped for greater margins of victory, they never seemed to be in any danger of going 3-0 thrice over the weekend.
So they finish the non-conference season 10-1, against what I consider to be a lackluster slate of opponents. Tonight (Wednesday night) they begin Big Ten play against Ohio St. I am thinking about going to the game, although the season premieres of The Middle and Law and Order: SVU will be on the TV. The Buckeyes don't have a single vote in this week's AVCA Top 25 (the Gophers are still in the high teens), but if this squad still isn't as sound as I think they are not, the game should be a competitive one. Come Saturday is the Big Kahuna, Penn St., the best volleyball program today.
#-2: Gopher football (Last Week: -4). You know, at least Jerry Kill is killing teams beneath the U. They defeat the San Jose St. Spartans 24-7 at Das Bank Saturday despite the fact that Quarterback Chris Streveler (filling in for a hurt Mitch Leidner, still dealing with his turf toe) attempted only seven passes all game and, get this, completed only one of those passes for seven yards. On the local news he was talking about getting razzed by classmates: "Congratulations on that one pass!" Congratulations indeed, Chris -- now, this Saturday at Michigan, let's go for two!
Seriously though, the Gophs didn't need to pass because David Cobb ran 34 times for a total of 207 yards on the ground, the second time this season he's run for more than 200 yards. And Streveler ran 18 times for 161 yards. Guess he's a "mobile" quarterback. But really, when you can roll up 380 yards rushing and win, why pass? Kill said as much in his weekly press conference.
And going back to Michigan, and I'm serious when I say this, they may not have as good a chance of beating the Wolverines and getting back the Little Brown Jug than this year. Head Coach Brady Hoke is basically a dead man walking after getting blown out at Notre Dame and losing at home last week to Utah. Fan apathy among students has gotten so bad that Coke ran a promotion giving out two tickets to Saturday's game with the purchase of two Coke products. You could buy $3 worth of Coke and get two tickets to the game -- that's how bad it is trying to fill up the 100,000-seat Big House. In other words, this is not a good team and there is no home-field advantage for the Gophers to worry about. If they don't allow Michigan's offense to come out of its doldrums and if they can continue to run like the dickens. ...
#-3: Twins (Last Week: -3). The season is winding down, and for the fourth year in a row the Twinks will lose at least 90 games. And it appeared that the whole roster has laid down and mentally checked out. But that long losing streak I envisioned was only three games long, and in fact they finished this screening week at 3-3. They actually wound up taking two-of-three from Detroit, and despite losing the weekend series at home vs. Cleveland and the first game in the home finale against Arizona, they beat the Diamondbacks Tuesday. In that game, Kyle Gibson won his 13th game. Along with Phil Hughes, who rejuvenated (if not saved) his career getting out of the American League East, the Twins at least have the semblance of 2/5ths of a rotation. I can't point out too many bright lights in the lineup, but they've been hitting and scoring a lot better in the second half of the season, so there's that. Beyond that ... well, Byron Buxton and Miguel Sano should both finally be healthy and ready for The Big Show. And that's all we got.
The final week of the regular consists of this (Wednesday) afternoon's home finale against Arizona, then the final four games in Detroit.
#-4: Vikings (Last Week: -5). It was a listless 20-6 loss in New Orleans, a defeat many of us expected. After all, this is still a bad team, and my rule is you have to give a mulligan to the first season of a new Head Coach. I place these guys above the University of Minnesota soccer team because the team seems to have bottomed out and turned a corner. The spectre of Adrian Peterson may still loom over the team's head, with conflicting reports of him trying to come back this season or not coming back to the Vikes at all, but the decision (albeit from pressure from the public) was taken out of the team's hands (for the most part) and now they can't do anything, they say, until Peterson sorts out his indictment on child abuse charges. Till then, the team plays. And loses, but again, the big controversy over Peterson is behind him.
The other big turning point is starting Quarterback Matt Cassel suffering broken bones in his foot in the game against the Saints. That ushers in faster than expected the Teddy Bridgewater Era, and even though they never reached the end zone, I have to say that Bridgewater looked pretty good being pressed into service unexpectedly. Hopefully with a full week with the first team they can put a touchdown drive together. Now, do they have a chance to win against Atlanta at TCF Bank? My gut says no. But at the very least this team is starting with a young rookie QB and fresh blood in the backfield in the wake of a legend who was nearing the end of his tenure in Minnesota. They may not be good yet, but at least they're not old, and that means Vikings fans have something to look forward to.
#-5: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -2). Is it possible that this team's hopes for reaching the NCAA Tournament have slammed shut due to Saturday night's 1-0 defeat at home to Iowa? It seems so. I don't think the Hawkeyes are a good team, so if you lose to them at Robbie, you might as well be screwed. A tally in Minute 33 was the decider.
Worse yet, this is the only home game for 28 days for this club. The good news is that means the back end of their schedule is loaded with home games (six-of-seven, although their season finale is at Northwestern), but they may be buried so deep in the bottom of the B1G standings that their fate would have already been sealed. In the meantime they have another weekend on the road, this time to the Hoosier State -- Purdue on Friday, Indiana Sunday afternoon.
So they finish the non-conference season 10-1, against what I consider to be a lackluster slate of opponents. Tonight (Wednesday night) they begin Big Ten play against Ohio St. I am thinking about going to the game, although the season premieres of The Middle and Law and Order: SVU will be on the TV. The Buckeyes don't have a single vote in this week's AVCA Top 25 (the Gophers are still in the high teens), but if this squad still isn't as sound as I think they are not, the game should be a competitive one. Come Saturday is the Big Kahuna, Penn St., the best volleyball program today.
#-2: Gopher football (Last Week: -4). You know, at least Jerry Kill is killing teams beneath the U. They defeat the San Jose St. Spartans 24-7 at Das Bank Saturday despite the fact that Quarterback Chris Streveler (filling in for a hurt Mitch Leidner, still dealing with his turf toe) attempted only seven passes all game and, get this, completed only one of those passes for seven yards. On the local news he was talking about getting razzed by classmates: "Congratulations on that one pass!" Congratulations indeed, Chris -- now, this Saturday at Michigan, let's go for two!
Seriously though, the Gophs didn't need to pass because David Cobb ran 34 times for a total of 207 yards on the ground, the second time this season he's run for more than 200 yards. And Streveler ran 18 times for 161 yards. Guess he's a "mobile" quarterback. But really, when you can roll up 380 yards rushing and win, why pass? Kill said as much in his weekly press conference.
And going back to Michigan, and I'm serious when I say this, they may not have as good a chance of beating the Wolverines and getting back the Little Brown Jug than this year. Head Coach Brady Hoke is basically a dead man walking after getting blown out at Notre Dame and losing at home last week to Utah. Fan apathy among students has gotten so bad that Coke ran a promotion giving out two tickets to Saturday's game with the purchase of two Coke products. You could buy $3 worth of Coke and get two tickets to the game -- that's how bad it is trying to fill up the 100,000-seat Big House. In other words, this is not a good team and there is no home-field advantage for the Gophers to worry about. If they don't allow Michigan's offense to come out of its doldrums and if they can continue to run like the dickens. ...
#-3: Twins (Last Week: -3). The season is winding down, and for the fourth year in a row the Twinks will lose at least 90 games. And it appeared that the whole roster has laid down and mentally checked out. But that long losing streak I envisioned was only three games long, and in fact they finished this screening week at 3-3. They actually wound up taking two-of-three from Detroit, and despite losing the weekend series at home vs. Cleveland and the first game in the home finale against Arizona, they beat the Diamondbacks Tuesday. In that game, Kyle Gibson won his 13th game. Along with Phil Hughes, who rejuvenated (if not saved) his career getting out of the American League East, the Twins at least have the semblance of 2/5ths of a rotation. I can't point out too many bright lights in the lineup, but they've been hitting and scoring a lot better in the second half of the season, so there's that. Beyond that ... well, Byron Buxton and Miguel Sano should both finally be healthy and ready for The Big Show. And that's all we got.
The final week of the regular consists of this (Wednesday) afternoon's home finale against Arizona, then the final four games in Detroit.
#-4: Vikings (Last Week: -5). It was a listless 20-6 loss in New Orleans, a defeat many of us expected. After all, this is still a bad team, and my rule is you have to give a mulligan to the first season of a new Head Coach. I place these guys above the University of Minnesota soccer team because the team seems to have bottomed out and turned a corner. The spectre of Adrian Peterson may still loom over the team's head, with conflicting reports of him trying to come back this season or not coming back to the Vikes at all, but the decision (albeit from pressure from the public) was taken out of the team's hands (for the most part) and now they can't do anything, they say, until Peterson sorts out his indictment on child abuse charges. Till then, the team plays. And loses, but again, the big controversy over Peterson is behind him.
The other big turning point is starting Quarterback Matt Cassel suffering broken bones in his foot in the game against the Saints. That ushers in faster than expected the Teddy Bridgewater Era, and even though they never reached the end zone, I have to say that Bridgewater looked pretty good being pressed into service unexpectedly. Hopefully with a full week with the first team they can put a touchdown drive together. Now, do they have a chance to win against Atlanta at TCF Bank? My gut says no. But at the very least this team is starting with a young rookie QB and fresh blood in the backfield in the wake of a legend who was nearing the end of his tenure in Minnesota. They may not be good yet, but at least they're not old, and that means Vikings fans have something to look forward to.
#-5: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -2). Is it possible that this team's hopes for reaching the NCAA Tournament have slammed shut due to Saturday night's 1-0 defeat at home to Iowa? It seems so. I don't think the Hawkeyes are a good team, so if you lose to them at Robbie, you might as well be screwed. A tally in Minute 33 was the decider.
Worse yet, this is the only home game for 28 days for this club. The good news is that means the back end of their schedule is loaded with home games (six-of-seven, although their season finale is at Northwestern), but they may be buried so deep in the bottom of the B1G standings that their fate would have already been sealed. In the meantime they have another weekend on the road, this time to the Hoosier State -- Purdue on Friday, Indiana Sunday afternoon.
Tuesday, September 23, 2014
Alright, Listen To Me, Goddammit ... (Scheduled Post)
... you're fucking up my training, bra, you really are. I understand that you've got a job to do, and someone really fucked it up the last time. Well, first of all, I was wrong in thinking that that person was doing her job. She didn't. But that's probably because you cramped my style by going all off on these codes you were talking about.
This is hard shit, OK? I didn't get it the first time, and I was close to getting my ass canned three years ago. And if doing is one thing, teaching is another. I don't know if I got this handled, if the attitudes of the first two people who stuck around are any indication, but you sure as fuck ain't helping.
And do you know what happened after you went on your little schpiel about your codes? One of them put that code on every single claim she did. Every single one -- and they were all wrong. Do you know what code she needed to put down? The one I told her. Why? Because no one over the age of 65 works. That's why. That happened to that person you fired last week, and this is what happened today. Thank Buddha you finally got that report up and running so we could catch those mistakes before they get to you. (Would help if everyone had them on their computers, but hey, baby steps.)
So I don't appreciate you busting my balls when I'm the one doing all the training. Yeah, it ultimately falls on you, but if I were you, I would at least take a little more responsibility and come around more than twice a day. Instead you sweep in, rag on me for not talking about the codes when I didn't fucking understand what you meant by "talking about the codes," get my asshole all clinched up in the goddamn process, you asshole, then proceed to confuse everybody by going on and on about codes they didn't need to fucking use. I'm not saying ignorance is bliss; because of you I think I have to alter what I'm going to teach them Tuesday. All I know is one girl had to waste her time because you filled her head with shit she didn't need to know yet.
I'm trying to like you, man. And I know that when times aren't stressful at work, you can be a good guy. But you're pissing me off with this bullshit. You take over or you let me handle it, just don't ruin this for us and we'll get this project done, OK?
This is hard shit, OK? I didn't get it the first time, and I was close to getting my ass canned three years ago. And if doing is one thing, teaching is another. I don't know if I got this handled, if the attitudes of the first two people who stuck around are any indication, but you sure as fuck ain't helping.
And do you know what happened after you went on your little schpiel about your codes? One of them put that code on every single claim she did. Every single one -- and they were all wrong. Do you know what code she needed to put down? The one I told her. Why? Because no one over the age of 65 works. That's why. That happened to that person you fired last week, and this is what happened today. Thank Buddha you finally got that report up and running so we could catch those mistakes before they get to you. (Would help if everyone had them on their computers, but hey, baby steps.)
So I don't appreciate you busting my balls when I'm the one doing all the training. Yeah, it ultimately falls on you, but if I were you, I would at least take a little more responsibility and come around more than twice a day. Instead you sweep in, rag on me for not talking about the codes when I didn't fucking understand what you meant by "talking about the codes," get my asshole all clinched up in the goddamn process, you asshole, then proceed to confuse everybody by going on and on about codes they didn't need to fucking use. I'm not saying ignorance is bliss; because of you I think I have to alter what I'm going to teach them Tuesday. All I know is one girl had to waste her time because you filled her head with shit she didn't need to know yet.
I'm trying to like you, man. And I know that when times aren't stressful at work, you can be a good guy. But you're pissing me off with this bullshit. You take over or you let me handle it, just don't ruin this for us and we'll get this project done, OK?
Monday, September 22, 2014
I Sent A Bug To Its Death By Drowning It Down The Bathroom Sink
I was just going to wash my face for the night, and I see this bug. It looked like the same bugs congregating around the bottom of our back door, probably because they were attracted to the plants (although I've never seen them before and the plants have been there the whole time). There were two of them. One of them was just around the basin of the sink. The other was on the plunger, right underneath the faucet.
And I just kind of said, "Eh." I moved the faucet around to avoid blasting the bug to hell, but obviously the splash was going to cascade that poor insect out of my existence. And after a few swigs from the suburban well, I looked down and that bug was gone.
I should be more reflective that I killed one of God's creatures, but I guess I'm not in a mood to care.
And I just kind of said, "Eh." I moved the faucet around to avoid blasting the bug to hell, but obviously the splash was going to cascade that poor insect out of my existence. And after a few swigs from the suburban well, I looked down and that bug was gone.
I should be more reflective that I killed one of God's creatures, but I guess I'm not in a mood to care.
Have I Said This Before? I Don't Care, I'll Say It Again
I think it's obvious that That Asshole at work is an asshole, and although he accepted my apology, he never has really forgiven me for barging in on him at lunch, even though he emphasized how important it was to get inventory right to the point where he intimated, strongly, I needed to get him if it's off. The way he ignores me is deafening, and frankly, it's pissing me off.
And speaking of inventory (even if I don't do it anymore), it's also obvious that he misled me about how much of a shit he gave about it. I don't see him doing anything about inventory beyond this one thing. So why did he act like it was all important? That's why I came to him -- it was important. But if lunch is more important to him, well, I guess it wasn't so important, now was it? And in the meantime I haven't seen him even getting close to the room. So fuck this guy. He's a liar, a selfish introvert who will do the barest fucking minimum just so his bosses think he's on top of things. Fucking hypocrite.
And do you know the most fucked-up thing about this all? A job has opened up with the company, and four people (one of which is the guy who is leaving the job) said I would be good for it. I would not be answering at all to The Asshole (at least I don't think), but would be working under the boss I am working under right now. Still, I would be in the same building as him, and the tension he's giving me is unbearable already. I'm thinking about this piece of shit during the weekend. Whenever I do something wrong I conjure his fucking face, yelling at me again like he did before. Do I really want a full-time job at the same place as this motherfucker?
And speaking of inventory (even if I don't do it anymore), it's also obvious that he misled me about how much of a shit he gave about it. I don't see him doing anything about inventory beyond this one thing. So why did he act like it was all important? That's why I came to him -- it was important. But if lunch is more important to him, well, I guess it wasn't so important, now was it? And in the meantime I haven't seen him even getting close to the room. So fuck this guy. He's a liar, a selfish introvert who will do the barest fucking minimum just so his bosses think he's on top of things. Fucking hypocrite.
And do you know the most fucked-up thing about this all? A job has opened up with the company, and four people (one of which is the guy who is leaving the job) said I would be good for it. I would not be answering at all to The Asshole (at least I don't think), but would be working under the boss I am working under right now. Still, I would be in the same building as him, and the tension he's giving me is unbearable already. I'm thinking about this piece of shit during the weekend. Whenever I do something wrong I conjure his fucking face, yelling at me again like he did before. Do I really want a full-time job at the same place as this motherfucker?
Sunday, September 21, 2014
I Fixed The Washing Machine. There (ETA Midnight On Monday, September 22 That I Meant To Say Therefore), I Have Become A Man
All week I was trying to get these three pieces of clothing (two pairs of work pants and a pair of boxers) washed. But, once again, the washing machine got stuck. Gave me those "ld" (long drain) and then those "ob" (off-balance) codes. Normally I would just shut it off and try it again, and that would usually work. But this time it wouldn't drain out of the tub after three tries.
It was at this point I believed I was in trouble. I could deal or avoid many things for five more months until my parents come back. Hell, there are many clothes that I see on the dining room floor that should have been washed weeks ago. But they eventually have to be washed, and facing the prospect of not being able to use the washing machine for five months (or going to, say, my brother's home or, ugh, some laundromat) terrified me. I think that is what spurred me into action.
I started looking online for "ld" and "ob" codes. I then saw sites that I had seen in the past the last time I Googled "washing machine won't drain" or something like that. I decided to go deeper, specifically ways in which to fix it. Luckily all those sites didn't say fixing this stuck washer was difficult or you'd have to call in a repairman. There were many sites devoted to what I thought was the problem, clearing out the washing machine pump. One of them was a really good YouTube video showing you step-by-step how to fix it. Although the model they used was not the one we have downstairs, it gave me the confidence that I could get the machine to work myself.
The pump itself isn't all that complicated, and it turns out that getting to it is also fairly simple. It's connected to two hoses clamped to the pump, and it's held next to the motor that spins the pump by two clips that I can easily remove. With that, I located Father's bucket of disorganized tools, turned off the washer, shut off the water, pulled out the machine and got to work.
Thought I had to open up the control panel, which is found on the back of the dials on top even though all the models I saw online were on the front. But what I needed to get to, the pump, actually was at the bottom. I got a little confused because one of the sites said that to get to the pump on our model, the Kenmore Calypso Elite, I had to go through the front. But a few others rightly said that it was located on the bottom. I was on a roll being able to open up the back plate of the control panel. Also crucial, I had been able to open that with the tools (specifcally pliers) that I found, and none of the bolts and screws broke when I took them out. So, on a Friday night where I wanted to go out for coffee, I decided to drill down and open up the bottom panel in order to fix the washing machine.
I slid out the washer a little more, then tipped it back, allowing the back of it to rest at a 45-degree angle against the wall and the water valves. Kenmore was very wise putting all the screws at the front of the machine; all I had to do was unscrew them (with the pliers -- thank God I didn't need anything else [ETA on Monday the 22nd at midnight that I am wrong about the tool; I used a box wrench, not pliers]) and the panel would flip down because the back of that panel is held in when it's slid into tabs. And voilà , there was the pump.
I didn't even need a screwdriver to unlock the clips, and I shimmied down the clamps with the pliers so I could pull out the two prongs of the pump. When it did, all the water in the tub started draining out. Thank God the floor drain was right to the right of the of the washing machine, and I learned to take off my slippers and put on my waterproof shoes. There was a pool of water, but within minutes the drain was able to take it all in.
Now I just hoped that the pump was salvageable. I sprayed into it, then looked into it. There was ... a bunch of nasty stuff in it, stuff I couldn't dislodge with my finger. So I used the screwdriver to root around it. Out came a rock and then a chip, both made of hard material. Was that it? Those two items lodged itself in the pump, preventing what I guess was the spinny thing inside of the pump to push water from the tub through the drain and out. That's why it wasn't draining, and that's why it got so clogged that water began to leak out through the bottom pan and onto the floor.
I put the pump back in, re-clamped and -clipped it, put the bottom pan back on, screwed everything back into place at the control panel ... then realized that there was still a lot of dripping water on the floor when I disconnected everything. I was satisfied with myself and the work I put in; at the very least I didn't do anything I couldn't undo, no screws broke, and it looked as if I put everything back to where it was (save for re-opening the water valves and plugging it back in). I decided to wait till the next day, after all the water dried.
It was half past midnight. For obsessively starting research on fixing this on the Internet that evening, needing only 2-3 hours to take out, clean and put back the water pump was a hell of an accomplishment.
---
Set-back Saturday. I woke up in the morning and saw that the floor was totally dry. So I slid the washing machine back to where it was and opened up the hot and cold water valves. But both valves started leaking. They weren't leaking before. Dammit!
Had visits to cemeteries and shakedowns to do that day, so I started researching in the late afternoon when I got back from those errands. I was really afraid that I had to spend my Saturday night getting a new washer or something. But the Internet, the entire Internet, told me to first tighten what is called the packing nut. Is that it? I took the pliers to these "nuts," turned them a quarter-turn clockwise, re-opened the valves, and hey, no more drip!
And then I plugged the washing machine back in, threw in the three pieces of clothing that were sitting in dirty water the past five days and tried to wash the whole thing from scratch. I let it do its thing while I brushed my teeth for the first time all week, and when I went back downstairs to the sound of water rushing out. Water was coming out of the pump!!
Ladies and gentlemen, this weekend I was able to fix a washing machine! And I was able to do it without any help from anyone, and without needing to buy anything, and without breaking anything. This weekend these two hands with which I'm typing right now was able to bring back an appliance from the dead. If that isn't the definition of masculinity, I don't know what is.
America, fuck yeah!!!
It was at this point I believed I was in trouble. I could deal or avoid many things for five more months until my parents come back. Hell, there are many clothes that I see on the dining room floor that should have been washed weeks ago. But they eventually have to be washed, and facing the prospect of not being able to use the washing machine for five months (or going to, say, my brother's home or, ugh, some laundromat) terrified me. I think that is what spurred me into action.
I started looking online for "ld" and "ob" codes. I then saw sites that I had seen in the past the last time I Googled "washing machine won't drain" or something like that. I decided to go deeper, specifically ways in which to fix it. Luckily all those sites didn't say fixing this stuck washer was difficult or you'd have to call in a repairman. There were many sites devoted to what I thought was the problem, clearing out the washing machine pump. One of them was a really good YouTube video showing you step-by-step how to fix it. Although the model they used was not the one we have downstairs, it gave me the confidence that I could get the machine to work myself.
The pump itself isn't all that complicated, and it turns out that getting to it is also fairly simple. It's connected to two hoses clamped to the pump, and it's held next to the motor that spins the pump by two clips that I can easily remove. With that, I located Father's bucket of disorganized tools, turned off the washer, shut off the water, pulled out the machine and got to work.
Thought I had to open up the control panel, which is found on the back of the dials on top even though all the models I saw online were on the front. But what I needed to get to, the pump, actually was at the bottom. I got a little confused because one of the sites said that to get to the pump on our model, the Kenmore Calypso Elite, I had to go through the front. But a few others rightly said that it was located on the bottom. I was on a roll being able to open up the back plate of the control panel. Also crucial, I had been able to open that with the tools (specifcally pliers) that I found, and none of the bolts and screws broke when I took them out. So, on a Friday night where I wanted to go out for coffee, I decided to drill down and open up the bottom panel in order to fix the washing machine.
I slid out the washer a little more, then tipped it back, allowing the back of it to rest at a 45-degree angle against the wall and the water valves. Kenmore was very wise putting all the screws at the front of the machine; all I had to do was unscrew them (with the pliers -- thank God I didn't need anything else [ETA on Monday the 22nd at midnight that I am wrong about the tool; I used a box wrench, not pliers]) and the panel would flip down because the back of that panel is held in when it's slid into tabs. And voilà , there was the pump.
I didn't even need a screwdriver to unlock the clips, and I shimmied down the clamps with the pliers so I could pull out the two prongs of the pump. When it did, all the water in the tub started draining out. Thank God the floor drain was right to the right of the of the washing machine, and I learned to take off my slippers and put on my waterproof shoes. There was a pool of water, but within minutes the drain was able to take it all in.
Now I just hoped that the pump was salvageable. I sprayed into it, then looked into it. There was ... a bunch of nasty stuff in it, stuff I couldn't dislodge with my finger. So I used the screwdriver to root around it. Out came a rock and then a chip, both made of hard material. Was that it? Those two items lodged itself in the pump, preventing what I guess was the spinny thing inside of the pump to push water from the tub through the drain and out. That's why it wasn't draining, and that's why it got so clogged that water began to leak out through the bottom pan and onto the floor.
I put the pump back in, re-clamped and -clipped it, put the bottom pan back on, screwed everything back into place at the control panel ... then realized that there was still a lot of dripping water on the floor when I disconnected everything. I was satisfied with myself and the work I put in; at the very least I didn't do anything I couldn't undo, no screws broke, and it looked as if I put everything back to where it was (save for re-opening the water valves and plugging it back in). I decided to wait till the next day, after all the water dried.
It was half past midnight. For obsessively starting research on fixing this on the Internet that evening, needing only 2-3 hours to take out, clean and put back the water pump was a hell of an accomplishment.
---
Set-back Saturday. I woke up in the morning and saw that the floor was totally dry. So I slid the washing machine back to where it was and opened up the hot and cold water valves. But both valves started leaking. They weren't leaking before. Dammit!
Had visits to cemeteries and shakedowns to do that day, so I started researching in the late afternoon when I got back from those errands. I was really afraid that I had to spend my Saturday night getting a new washer or something. But the Internet, the entire Internet, told me to first tighten what is called the packing nut. Is that it? I took the pliers to these "nuts," turned them a quarter-turn clockwise, re-opened the valves, and hey, no more drip!
And then I plugged the washing machine back in, threw in the three pieces of clothing that were sitting in dirty water the past five days and tried to wash the whole thing from scratch. I let it do its thing while I brushed my teeth for the first time all week, and when I went back downstairs to the sound of water rushing out. Water was coming out of the pump!!
Ladies and gentlemen, this weekend I was able to fix a washing machine! And I was able to do it without any help from anyone, and without needing to buy anything, and without breaking anything. This weekend these two hands with which I'm typing right now was able to bring back an appliance from the dead. If that isn't the definition of masculinity, I don't know what is.
America, fuck yeah!!!
Saturday, September 20, 2014
A Rough Draft Of My Previous Blog Post ... A Really Rough Draft
I wanted to write my previous blog post, about the moth, before I went to bed late Thursday evening. But I got really tired while writing it. I mean, I was crashing, hard, as hard as I ever have in memory.
I tried to tough it out, but while trying to round third and head home with the post, I wrote this. If you read what I decided to publish and compare the two, you might think I'm absolutely crazy:
Came back a little later; looked at the moth carcass turning brown and dry. Well, they say that as soon as a body no longer consumes any energy, he will be desperate just before he croaks. I didn't think I was at that stage, so I continued
I tried to tough it out, but while trying to round third and head home with the post, I wrote this. If you read what I decided to publish and compare the two, you might think I'm absolutely crazy:
Came back a little later; looked at the moth carcass turning brown and dry. Well, they say that as soon as a body no longer consumes any energy, he will be desperate just before he croaks. I didn't think I was at that stage, so I continued
That didn't happen, by the way. There weren't a whole lot of people around, and I waited for mere seconds before getting help.
I have no freakin' clue where I was going with this. But while my body was going to shut down at any second in front of my computer, I at least still had enough mental awareness to know what I just wrote was gibberish, that I could not write anything close to competent, and that this would have to wait until I got home from work the next day. I guess my subconscious dream state wrote this, or one of my split personalities.
I have no freakin' clue where I was going with this. But while my body was going to shut down at any second in front of my computer, I at least still had enough mental awareness to know what I just wrote was gibberish, that I could not write anything close to competent, and that this would have to wait until I got home from work the next day. I guess my subconscious dream state wrote this, or one of my split personalities.
Friday, September 19, 2014
Dumb, Drunk, Demented House Moth
Off and on over the past few hours I've been trying to save this little house moth from death, and from itself.
I first saw this guy wildly gesticulating his legs while it appeared to be face-up on a large drop of water at the bottom of the bathroom sink. Now, I never thought a drop of water to be dangerous, but to a little creature like a moth it probably looks as wide and deep as the ocean. So because I didn't want to turn on the faucet and drain it to its death in the suburban pipe system, I took my tweezers and tried to save it. I flipped it around, tried to get it away from water, but whenever I did put it back upright he'd jerk around back and forth with no rhyme nor reason, then stumble into another drop of water in the sink like it was actively seeking to be drowning in water. And for a while it looked like that is exactly what happened. But after I touched it with my tweezers, those moth legs began to flap around again, and I knew that it was very much alive, though quite, quite stupid to function as a productive member of society.
After making sure I don't crush the moth by squeezing the tweezers, I finally brought him up from the basin and, with the help of my mini-stapler, I deposited him on the bathroom counter. I thought things would be good and the moth would be safe to (if its wings were damaged by the water or my tweezers) limp around the house until it died. But I came back a little later to see that it was back in the sink. And this time it looked as if it was a grain of rice -- legs and wings pressed up against the body like it was about to be wrapped. I don't know what happened, but I surmised that he just wanted to go back down, did, and naturally got caught in water that stuck its wings and legs together, and it died because it couldn't move to find something to eat.
I got the tweezers for the little house moth -- not to save it, but to finally dispose of the dead insect carcass in the trash. But once again, after I jabbed it once, the moth sprang to life, albeit really herky-jerky in walking from place to the other. Great, I need to save this thing again. And I did, carrying it up into my soap dish.
Came back later in the night to see its legs and wings wrapped tightly against its body, looking like a grain of rice. The water may have binded the moth's parts together, but it looked dead. I touched it again with my tweezers, and once again it kicked back to life. But like all those times I saved it, the moth had a devil of a time righting itself. I have no idea whether it's on its back or not, so I flip it over. The moth spreads its wings and starts pacing on the soap dish, but it's weird. It doesn't just turn, it goes one way then immediately goes the other way, and the moth does it so fast it's as if it cut from moving one way then moving 180 degrees in the other direction. It was that fly in that tape in the American version of The Ring. Don't know what else to do, so I just left it because it's alive!!!
Last time before going to bed, I see it again, and I'll be damned if that moth is belly-up once again in the sink! This damn moth has a death wish or something. It looked dead, but this time I didn't really give a damn whether or not it really was dead because I got sick of saving it. So I turned on the faucet to wash my fingers, and I didn't care if I washed the moth down the drain. (I didn't.)
---
This morning I woke up ... and the moth was gone. I have no idea what happened. Maybe it found a way out. Maybe it finally reached its destination of dying down the drain. If it's either, I have to ask how it found the power to move either up the sink wall or down vertically into the drain. There's a third explanation: Something else ate that dumb, drunk, demented house moth.
Came back later in the night to see its legs and wings wrapped tightly against its body, looking like a grain of rice. The water may have binded the moth's parts together, but it looked dead. I touched it again with my tweezers, and once again it kicked back to life. But like all those times I saved it, the moth had a devil of a time righting itself. I have no idea whether it's on its back or not, so I flip it over. The moth spreads its wings and starts pacing on the soap dish, but it's weird. It doesn't just turn, it goes one way then immediately goes the other way, and the moth does it so fast it's as if it cut from moving one way then moving 180 degrees in the other direction. It was that fly in that tape in the American version of The Ring. Don't know what else to do, so I just left it because it's alive!!!
Last time before going to bed, I see it again, and I'll be damned if that moth is belly-up once again in the sink! This damn moth has a death wish or something. It looked dead, but this time I didn't really give a damn whether or not it really was dead because I got sick of saving it. So I turned on the faucet to wash my fingers, and I didn't care if I washed the moth down the drain. (I didn't.)
---
This morning I woke up ... and the moth was gone. I have no idea what happened. Maybe it found a way out. Maybe it finally reached its destination of dying down the drain. If it's either, I have to ask how it found the power to move either up the sink wall or down vertically into the drain. There's a third explanation: Something else ate that dumb, drunk, demented house moth.
Thursday, September 18, 2014
In Praise Of The Intersection Under Construction
It's been a bitch to go back home from University, but I have been able to avoid it by going on East River Rd. instead, so things are better for afternoon rush. Morning rush, however, has been a relative breeze, and I want to note that before things take a turn for the worse.
It's Central, and usually, even though I have to take a right turn to get onto it, I hit the intersection at a red light while car after car is zooming down it. It's so steady, even at 6:30, that I can't turn onto it until my light turns green. It's really frustrating, and I get really antsy if there's someone behind me. I know they have a car that can accelerate into traffic without a problem, and they're probably chomping at the bit, wanting to push me aside if they could. But I don't have a fast car, and I have to pick my spot in order to merge safely, or even drive on the shoulder until I can find a safe pocket to get into.
I thought that the advent of construction, which has gone on for several months, would make making that right turn even more difficult. But instead, it hasn't. With the news that parts of Central Avenue is closed, many cars have stayed away, which has alleviated traffic. What is even better is that at some point a few weeks ago the light at our intersection was taken down because they were repaving the area. I don't know how, but that meant that even fewer cars went south on Central, allowing me to get in much quicker than I could otherwise. The result: What could have taken upwards of 90 seconds, where I would sometimes turn off my engine because I knew I wasn't going anyway, oftentimes took only ten.
Many times I run late to work. But I live so close, so I wonder why it takes me so long. It's that intersection, that's why. And with me able to make a right without much agita, I can start my car at 6:40 and get to work with a minute or so to spare. Beautiful.
Today, however, the streetlight was re-erected and turned back on. I noticed an uptick in speeding traffic, and even though my wait to take a right wasn't too long, it appears as though the major work on this intersection is over. Winter is coming, and pretty soon the entire project surrounding the repaving of Central will be done. And then I will wait in the cold for a half-minute, minute, minute-and-a-half, just to merge onto the morning rush. Boo.
It's Central, and usually, even though I have to take a right turn to get onto it, I hit the intersection at a red light while car after car is zooming down it. It's so steady, even at 6:30, that I can't turn onto it until my light turns green. It's really frustrating, and I get really antsy if there's someone behind me. I know they have a car that can accelerate into traffic without a problem, and they're probably chomping at the bit, wanting to push me aside if they could. But I don't have a fast car, and I have to pick my spot in order to merge safely, or even drive on the shoulder until I can find a safe pocket to get into.
I thought that the advent of construction, which has gone on for several months, would make making that right turn even more difficult. But instead, it hasn't. With the news that parts of Central Avenue is closed, many cars have stayed away, which has alleviated traffic. What is even better is that at some point a few weeks ago the light at our intersection was taken down because they were repaving the area. I don't know how, but that meant that even fewer cars went south on Central, allowing me to get in much quicker than I could otherwise. The result: What could have taken upwards of 90 seconds, where I would sometimes turn off my engine because I knew I wasn't going anyway, oftentimes took only ten.
Many times I run late to work. But I live so close, so I wonder why it takes me so long. It's that intersection, that's why. And with me able to make a right without much agita, I can start my car at 6:40 and get to work with a minute or so to spare. Beautiful.
Today, however, the streetlight was re-erected and turned back on. I noticed an uptick in speeding traffic, and even though my wait to take a right wasn't too long, it appears as though the major work on this intersection is over. Winter is coming, and pretty soon the entire project surrounding the repaving of Central will be done. And then I will wait in the cold for a half-minute, minute, minute-and-a-half, just to merge onto the morning rush. Boo.
Wednesday, September 17, 2014
The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey
#-1: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: -3). This is the weakest survey in recent memory. Yeah, I know the Goph volleyers won their Diet Coke Classic by beating the other three opponents (Tulsa, Wisconsin-Milwaukee and Iowa St.). But the club dropped a set to each of them. The Cyclones I might understand; the Golden Hurricane and ... uh, Panthers? ... absolutely not.
Only three of their seven wins have been sweeps, and it's not as if they've been playing a Murderers' Row of non-conference opponents. Arguably their best competitor so far, Louisville, they lost to in four sets -- at home. As I have said before, there is something seriously, seriously wrong with this team, and I don't know what the hell it is.
They finish their non-con slate at the Toledo Tournament, and the tomato cans set up for the U. are Duquesne, the host Rockets and Indiana-Purdue at Fort Wayne. They should beat all of them by the minimum nine sets. Guess here is that they don't, not even close.
#-2: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -5). According to this breakdown of the Big Ten teams' performances before beginning conference play, the Gophers are on the outside looking in. Marquette may be the biggest scalp so far, but losing at Ole Miss and Auburn two weekends ago may hurt them, especially if the Rebels and Tigers are sitting on the bubble with the Goofers at season's end.
I have no idea if their split to begin the B1G at the Michigan schools helps or hinders the squad. At least both games went past regulation. In Friday's game against Michigan, the U. lost 2-1 on a free kick in the 94th minute. But on Sunday afternoon at Michigan St., Sophomore Midfielder Josee Stiever cleaned up a Gopher corner kick in the 93rd minute to eke out a 1-0 win.
They have only one game this week, and it's their conference home opener, against Iowa, Saturday at 7. I might be there, or I might be entertaining a friend of my sister's, one whom my sis warned me was "arrogant." And I get to meet her? Wow, what an honor! (wanking motion)
#-3: Twins (Last Week: -4). I was tempted, very tempted, to slot the Twinks before the Gopher gridironers. It has been a thankless season, especially the back half, so why make gratuitous messages slamming the team now when I really haven't before? Well, Mother Nature postponed games in Cleveland Wednesday and in Chicago Friday. Since the Twinks were still in the middle of the series (serieses?) they made up for them by playing doubleheaders against both the following day. And they lost both doubleheaders. Two, not just in the same week, but in three days. Is that a record or something? I'll bet that's the first time that has happened in Twinks franchise history. There has been a lot of suckiness to go around, but having days off before losing a pair in the same day back-to-back intensifies the suckiness. That's such an embarrassing achievement I wanted to drop them lower.
Alas, they managed to win -- not just one game but two, thereby finishing the screening week a 2-5. The last game Tuesday night was won in comeback fashion but not before Closer (and until now indefatigable player) Glen Perkins pissed away his second save situation in four days. On Saturday night he gave up a home run to the White Sox's Jose Abreu. Last (Tuesday) night the Twins were leading 2-0 going into the top of the ninth when Perkins served up a three-run home run to J.D. Martinez to give Detroit a 3-2 lead.
That was when I turned off the radio and said, Fuck it, I'm going to sleep. (My body forced me to shut down; fell asleep around 9:30 I think, woke up briefly at midnight, then slept all the way to 5:45.) Then, this morning, I went on ESPN.com and saw that the Twins actually came back from their choke to win 4-3 in the bottom of the ninth! And they did it off the bat of Aaron Hicks and the feet of Pinch Runner Chris Herrmann, the former of whose ground ball to shortstop and the latter of whose feet beat the throw from short capped off a rare come-from-behind victory. I guess I should have kept the radio on for the bottom of the 9th; after all, it was Joe Nathan who was pitching for Detroit and choked back the game to us.
Speaking of Perkins, tweets today say he's getting his neck checked out. Must be from all those home runs he had to turn around to see after he gave them up. They finish their three-game series against the Tigers tonight (Wednesday night), then continue their final homestand of the season with a weekend trio vs. Cleveland and, in the final series at Target, a three-game set against Arizona starting on Monday.
#-4: Gopher football (Last Week: -2). Well, I guess they're not going to the College Football Playoff. I don't mind the team challenging itself by playing a true road game at TCU (take notes, SEC -- if you have opposable thumbs), but yeah, it would have been nice to win, and if not, to make a game of it, not lose 30-7. Meanwhile, starting Quarterback Mitch Leidner is hurt. He'll play at home against San Jose St. this Saturday afternoon, but if he's not at 100%, there's 0% chance this team will do anything.
#-5: Vikings (Last Week: -1). Well, fuck, what else can you say about the latest Worst Week Ever In ViQueens History? The loss to New England in the first game at TCF Bank Stadium is a complete afterthought. (I want to note, however, that the Vikes lost by the same score as the Gophers, 30-7.)
As someone who got the shit beat out of him to the point where he could no longer function as a normal person in society, I am horrified by the allegations of physical abuse by Adrian Peterson. But I also know that a lot of people believe that all All Day was doing was disciplining his son (or at least a boy he fathered; he's like the Shawn Kemp of the NFL with all the kids he has) and he absolutely did nothing wrong. And I have to admit that if he switched his son for shoving a boy away from a video game ... well, I would've been pissed off at my son, too. Probably a good reason, then, not to be a father.
Tons of people are pillorying the NFL for their actions over Peterson as well. I truly believe that the accusations would be shocking if what happened was the only thing that happened off-the-field with The Shield this week. But that it came as a chaser to a second video of Ray Rice knocking out his then-girlfriend (and now-wife) seemed to amplify the outcry over Peterson. I'm not saying it's all overblown. But I think some of it is. And, to be perfectly honest, I think much of the venom towards the league is unwarranted.
First of all, there is a thing called due process. Many times I don't like it at all, but when people demand the NFL do something, the reason that they don't (or don't fast enough to many people's liking) is that the subject in question has rights and that many of them are codified in a contract or agreement that prevents them from taking swift action without a vetted process and/or without swift retribution by the NFL players' union or the owners of the team he's playing for. While the outrage is genuine and, for the most part, correct, I sense a mob mentality growing. I don't totally blame Commissioner Roger Goodell for the actions of Rice and Peterson. And while the reaction hasn't been the greatest, calls for his resignation, to me, distract from the real perpetrators of these heinous crimes, Rice and Peterson themselves.
Moreover, the NFL is a business. They make billions of dollars, and we give them those billions in order to be entertained. I'm not sure why there is such moral anger over a business. On the one hand we demand the league to be judge, jury and executioner, but when the NFL actually acts like a behemoth, we go, "You people are just football, don't act all high and mighty." I really believe there is a hypocrisy going on by the public who want blood splatter on The Shield, and then demand said blood when it's Sunday. You either like the NFL or you don't, and you don't have much of a right to jerk it around according to your morals which, in my opinion, seem to escalate at a whim.
And by the way, I don't understand why the NFL, nor Vikings Owner Zygi Wilf, just go ahead and admit that the about-face in regards to barring Rice from the league and suspending Peterson and Carolina Panther Greg Hardy (for beating his pregnant girlfriend) was because the public didn't like it. They are a business, and businesses have to make decisions in order to stay in business. So they take action, the public doesn't like, so they change course and do something else. That's the way shit gets done, people. You got pissed off, and you demand change, and you get it! Any bitching that the league or its teams should have known better damn well know that if they unilaterally cut star players 1) they will incur the wrath of the players' union and 2) their team will lose, which means people (probably the same people who demanded that player be cut) will bitch about them losing because they hastily cut their star player. They are damned if they do and damned if they don't. I'm angrier with the Wilfs for not admitting that the NFL decided to put Peterson "on a list" because sponsors weren't going to give them money anymore. If they say that, people would understand. Goodell caught hell for saying the NFL made a mistake when they initially suspending Rice only for two games and after they instituted a new domestic violence policy. I really believe he was being honest. Now about being honest about whether or not he saw the second video before he said he did, I can't say. I'm just saying that as big and bad as the NFL is, people suck, too.
And what of Peterson? Honestly, his legacy is intact. He's going to the Pro Football Hall of Fame and he'll make it to the team's Ring of Honor ... just, oh, five or ten years after he would if we didn't know that he smashed his boy's head against the dashboard while in the car. (Wow.) What he did on the field will never be touched, even if he gets cut tomorrow. And when all is said and done, even though his physical abuse of the children he's fathered will forever taint the man, the legend of Adrian Peterson, Minnesota Viking will be enshrined no matter what happens. This will be the next Kirby Puckett, a man whose fans will want to remember only in the arena, and will scream so loud that it will keep the real truth of the monster out of the uniform in the shadows.
Oh yeah -- Minnesota visits desperate (and 0-2) New Orleans Sunday. If it turns out that Drew Brees likes to eat orphans, it wouldn't completely surprise me.
Only three of their seven wins have been sweeps, and it's not as if they've been playing a Murderers' Row of non-conference opponents. Arguably their best competitor so far, Louisville, they lost to in four sets -- at home. As I have said before, there is something seriously, seriously wrong with this team, and I don't know what the hell it is.
They finish their non-con slate at the Toledo Tournament, and the tomato cans set up for the U. are Duquesne, the host Rockets and Indiana-Purdue at Fort Wayne. They should beat all of them by the minimum nine sets. Guess here is that they don't, not even close.
#-2: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -5). According to this breakdown of the Big Ten teams' performances before beginning conference play, the Gophers are on the outside looking in. Marquette may be the biggest scalp so far, but losing at Ole Miss and Auburn two weekends ago may hurt them, especially if the Rebels and Tigers are sitting on the bubble with the Goofers at season's end.
I have no idea if their split to begin the B1G at the Michigan schools helps or hinders the squad. At least both games went past regulation. In Friday's game against Michigan, the U. lost 2-1 on a free kick in the 94th minute. But on Sunday afternoon at Michigan St., Sophomore Midfielder Josee Stiever cleaned up a Gopher corner kick in the 93rd minute to eke out a 1-0 win.
They have only one game this week, and it's their conference home opener, against Iowa, Saturday at 7. I might be there, or I might be entertaining a friend of my sister's, one whom my sis warned me was "arrogant." And I get to meet her? Wow, what an honor! (wanking motion)
#-3: Twins (Last Week: -4). I was tempted, very tempted, to slot the Twinks before the Gopher gridironers. It has been a thankless season, especially the back half, so why make gratuitous messages slamming the team now when I really haven't before? Well, Mother Nature postponed games in Cleveland Wednesday and in Chicago Friday. Since the Twinks were still in the middle of the series (serieses?) they made up for them by playing doubleheaders against both the following day. And they lost both doubleheaders. Two, not just in the same week, but in three days. Is that a record or something? I'll bet that's the first time that has happened in Twinks franchise history. There has been a lot of suckiness to go around, but having days off before losing a pair in the same day back-to-back intensifies the suckiness. That's such an embarrassing achievement I wanted to drop them lower.
Alas, they managed to win -- not just one game but two, thereby finishing the screening week a 2-5. The last game Tuesday night was won in comeback fashion but not before Closer (and until now indefatigable player) Glen Perkins pissed away his second save situation in four days. On Saturday night he gave up a home run to the White Sox's Jose Abreu. Last (Tuesday) night the Twins were leading 2-0 going into the top of the ninth when Perkins served up a three-run home run to J.D. Martinez to give Detroit a 3-2 lead.
That was when I turned off the radio and said, Fuck it, I'm going to sleep. (My body forced me to shut down; fell asleep around 9:30 I think, woke up briefly at midnight, then slept all the way to 5:45.) Then, this morning, I went on ESPN.com and saw that the Twins actually came back from their choke to win 4-3 in the bottom of the ninth! And they did it off the bat of Aaron Hicks and the feet of Pinch Runner Chris Herrmann, the former of whose ground ball to shortstop and the latter of whose feet beat the throw from short capped off a rare come-from-behind victory. I guess I should have kept the radio on for the bottom of the 9th; after all, it was Joe Nathan who was pitching for Detroit and choked back the game to us.
Speaking of Perkins, tweets today say he's getting his neck checked out. Must be from all those home runs he had to turn around to see after he gave them up. They finish their three-game series against the Tigers tonight (Wednesday night), then continue their final homestand of the season with a weekend trio vs. Cleveland and, in the final series at Target, a three-game set against Arizona starting on Monday.
#-4: Gopher football (Last Week: -2). Well, I guess they're not going to the College Football Playoff. I don't mind the team challenging itself by playing a true road game at TCU (take notes, SEC -- if you have opposable thumbs), but yeah, it would have been nice to win, and if not, to make a game of it, not lose 30-7. Meanwhile, starting Quarterback Mitch Leidner is hurt. He'll play at home against San Jose St. this Saturday afternoon, but if he's not at 100%, there's 0% chance this team will do anything.
#-5: Vikings (Last Week: -1). Well, fuck, what else can you say about the latest Worst Week Ever In ViQueens History? The loss to New England in the first game at TCF Bank Stadium is a complete afterthought. (I want to note, however, that the Vikes lost by the same score as the Gophers, 30-7.)
As someone who got the shit beat out of him to the point where he could no longer function as a normal person in society, I am horrified by the allegations of physical abuse by Adrian Peterson. But I also know that a lot of people believe that all All Day was doing was disciplining his son (or at least a boy he fathered; he's like the Shawn Kemp of the NFL with all the kids he has) and he absolutely did nothing wrong. And I have to admit that if he switched his son for shoving a boy away from a video game ... well, I would've been pissed off at my son, too. Probably a good reason, then, not to be a father.
Tons of people are pillorying the NFL for their actions over Peterson as well. I truly believe that the accusations would be shocking if what happened was the only thing that happened off-the-field with The Shield this week. But that it came as a chaser to a second video of Ray Rice knocking out his then-girlfriend (and now-wife) seemed to amplify the outcry over Peterson. I'm not saying it's all overblown. But I think some of it is. And, to be perfectly honest, I think much of the venom towards the league is unwarranted.
First of all, there is a thing called due process. Many times I don't like it at all, but when people demand the NFL do something, the reason that they don't (or don't fast enough to many people's liking) is that the subject in question has rights and that many of them are codified in a contract or agreement that prevents them from taking swift action without a vetted process and/or without swift retribution by the NFL players' union or the owners of the team he's playing for. While the outrage is genuine and, for the most part, correct, I sense a mob mentality growing. I don't totally blame Commissioner Roger Goodell for the actions of Rice and Peterson. And while the reaction hasn't been the greatest, calls for his resignation, to me, distract from the real perpetrators of these heinous crimes, Rice and Peterson themselves.
Moreover, the NFL is a business. They make billions of dollars, and we give them those billions in order to be entertained. I'm not sure why there is such moral anger over a business. On the one hand we demand the league to be judge, jury and executioner, but when the NFL actually acts like a behemoth, we go, "You people are just football, don't act all high and mighty." I really believe there is a hypocrisy going on by the public who want blood splatter on The Shield, and then demand said blood when it's Sunday. You either like the NFL or you don't, and you don't have much of a right to jerk it around according to your morals which, in my opinion, seem to escalate at a whim.
And by the way, I don't understand why the NFL, nor Vikings Owner Zygi Wilf, just go ahead and admit that the about-face in regards to barring Rice from the league and suspending Peterson and Carolina Panther Greg Hardy (for beating his pregnant girlfriend) was because the public didn't like it. They are a business, and businesses have to make decisions in order to stay in business. So they take action, the public doesn't like, so they change course and do something else. That's the way shit gets done, people. You got pissed off, and you demand change, and you get it! Any bitching that the league or its teams should have known better damn well know that if they unilaterally cut star players 1) they will incur the wrath of the players' union and 2) their team will lose, which means people (probably the same people who demanded that player be cut) will bitch about them losing because they hastily cut their star player. They are damned if they do and damned if they don't. I'm angrier with the Wilfs for not admitting that the NFL decided to put Peterson "on a list" because sponsors weren't going to give them money anymore. If they say that, people would understand. Goodell caught hell for saying the NFL made a mistake when they initially suspending Rice only for two games and after they instituted a new domestic violence policy. I really believe he was being honest. Now about being honest about whether or not he saw the second video before he said he did, I can't say. I'm just saying that as big and bad as the NFL is, people suck, too.
And what of Peterson? Honestly, his legacy is intact. He's going to the Pro Football Hall of Fame and he'll make it to the team's Ring of Honor ... just, oh, five or ten years after he would if we didn't know that he smashed his boy's head against the dashboard while in the car. (Wow.) What he did on the field will never be touched, even if he gets cut tomorrow. And when all is said and done, even though his physical abuse of the children he's fathered will forever taint the man, the legend of Adrian Peterson, Minnesota Viking will be enshrined no matter what happens. This will be the next Kirby Puckett, a man whose fans will want to remember only in the arena, and will scream so loud that it will keep the real truth of the monster out of the uniform in the shadows.
Oh yeah -- Minnesota visits desperate (and 0-2) New Orleans Sunday. If it turns out that Drew Brees likes to eat orphans, it wouldn't completely surprise me.
Tuesday, September 16, 2014
Apparently, I Was Being Rude Again
All right, this shit is just pissing me off. I have a facebook friend whom I've never met in person, but we probably have a mutual friend in a Playboy Playmate and she posted a photo of herself biting into a fake penis and so I had to friend her (long story, too boring to blog).
She updated her status to say that she received disappointing news. I asked, "What, did you lose your job?" And suddenly, this person who I thought I knew to be a pretty cool, level-headed chick, just went off on me. "Why are you so obsessed with my job?" she wondered, "Really, be quiet about this!"
Whoa, another fucking blindside. Like The Asshole at work, all I did was ask a fucking question and this chick just goes nuts. So once again I have to fall on my sword just to fucking keep the peace and say "Sorry, sorry" even though I don't think I asked anything that was impolite. She accepted my apology, but warned me, sternly, like a schoolmarm, not to do that again. And like with The Asshole, I have no goddamn idea what was so wrong about what I said.
You know what? I'm tired of thinking that I said the wrong thing. Is it possible to tell someone he needs a few minutes to himself without flipping out? Does someone have to automatically get so defensive about speculating she lost a job, a job we had discussed at length and without any issues of privacy before? I seriously don't know what I have said these past, oh, four weeks that is frowned upon, I just don't. And yet I have to feel like I do just to get along with society.
These are the days where I just want to stay home and not leave my bed for, oh, the entire winter. It's so much easier to deal with people and civilization if you don't talk to them, you know? Shit, man, everybody at work was being kind of pissy. Why should I even make a living if I have to deal with other people's bullshit? And why do I have to worry about pissing people off at all? I WAS JUST ASKING A FUCKING QUESTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
--
And by the way, if she felt I was being rude for intruding on her privacy, I would suggest that she should not post pics to Facebook every five fuckin' minutes. Seriously, half of my timeline is her sharing (or dare I say oversharing) mundane photos from her life. She uploads shots of the food she's eating, takes selfies thrice a day, and even poses in a bikini for me and her friends. (BTW, she looks really good for her fifties -- quite fuckable, but she's got a husband/boyfriend, and even if she didn't, she probably wouldn't fuck me after my oh-so-deplorable question.) All she does is dish about her life, and yet when I ask her about her life, she snaps at me. What the fuck? Hypocrisy much??
---
Thinking about the interactions I had Monday I think I stumbled upon an epiphany: This is why I like strippers. When you're talking to women who are naked, there really aren't layers (figuratively as well as literally) of discretion you have to worry about intruding upon. Just about everything is fair game; you can talk about anything, ask just about anything, and be yourself, so let your freak flag fly. After all, you're at a place where women are whipping their tits out. Normal bonds of society stay outside the strip club door.
What happened a month ago and just now online reinforces how at home I feel at a stripclub. I can be myself in a strip club. More importantly, I don't have to worry about offending anyone at a strip club. I am in my natural state in a strip club. I am at my happiest and safest in a strip club. Hell, other people are happy at a strip club, too; Sunday after the game I went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Version) and a guy, just hanging about by himself but having such a good time that he was cheering the strippers onstage from the far end of the bar, bought a drink for me. (It was a Grape Ape, and I don't know what that is, but it was good, even though it looked and tasted like the congestion medicine I had to take for years as a child.) See, I didn't have to worry about saying the wrong thing to this guy, because it was all good to him.
Maybe I should wrap myself in the secure cocoon of a strip club more often. Seems like what I'm going through lately justifies that notion.
She updated her status to say that she received disappointing news. I asked, "What, did you lose your job?" And suddenly, this person who I thought I knew to be a pretty cool, level-headed chick, just went off on me. "Why are you so obsessed with my job?" she wondered, "Really, be quiet about this!"
Whoa, another fucking blindside. Like The Asshole at work, all I did was ask a fucking question and this chick just goes nuts. So once again I have to fall on my sword just to fucking keep the peace and say "Sorry, sorry" even though I don't think I asked anything that was impolite. She accepted my apology, but warned me, sternly, like a schoolmarm, not to do that again. And like with The Asshole, I have no goddamn idea what was so wrong about what I said.
You know what? I'm tired of thinking that I said the wrong thing. Is it possible to tell someone he needs a few minutes to himself without flipping out? Does someone have to automatically get so defensive about speculating she lost a job, a job we had discussed at length and without any issues of privacy before? I seriously don't know what I have said these past, oh, four weeks that is frowned upon, I just don't. And yet I have to feel like I do just to get along with society.
These are the days where I just want to stay home and not leave my bed for, oh, the entire winter. It's so much easier to deal with people and civilization if you don't talk to them, you know? Shit, man, everybody at work was being kind of pissy. Why should I even make a living if I have to deal with other people's bullshit? And why do I have to worry about pissing people off at all? I WAS JUST ASKING A FUCKING QUESTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
--
And by the way, if she felt I was being rude for intruding on her privacy, I would suggest that she should not post pics to Facebook every five fuckin' minutes. Seriously, half of my timeline is her sharing (or dare I say oversharing) mundane photos from her life. She uploads shots of the food she's eating, takes selfies thrice a day, and even poses in a bikini for me and her friends. (BTW, she looks really good for her fifties -- quite fuckable, but she's got a husband/boyfriend, and even if she didn't, she probably wouldn't fuck me after my oh-so-deplorable question.) All she does is dish about her life, and yet when I ask her about her life, she snaps at me. What the fuck? Hypocrisy much??
---
Thinking about the interactions I had Monday I think I stumbled upon an epiphany: This is why I like strippers. When you're talking to women who are naked, there really aren't layers (figuratively as well as literally) of discretion you have to worry about intruding upon. Just about everything is fair game; you can talk about anything, ask just about anything, and be yourself, so let your freak flag fly. After all, you're at a place where women are whipping their tits out. Normal bonds of society stay outside the strip club door.
What happened a month ago and just now online reinforces how at home I feel at a stripclub. I can be myself in a strip club. More importantly, I don't have to worry about offending anyone at a strip club. I am in my natural state in a strip club. I am at my happiest and safest in a strip club. Hell, other people are happy at a strip club, too; Sunday after the game I went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Version) and a guy, just hanging about by himself but having such a good time that he was cheering the strippers onstage from the far end of the bar, bought a drink for me. (It was a Grape Ape, and I don't know what that is, but it was good, even though it looked and tasted like the congestion medicine I had to take for years as a child.) See, I didn't have to worry about saying the wrong thing to this guy, because it was all good to him.
Maybe I should wrap myself in the secure cocoon of a strip club more often. Seems like what I'm going through lately justifies that notion.
Monday, September 15, 2014
"Do I Understand This?"
What the fuck? Of course I fucking understand this. If I didn't I wouldn't be here three years in a row. What kind of fucking question is that? You think I know how to train these people to be super keyers? I'm a doer, not a teacher. I was going to get into that today, but apparently you freaked out Friday. If you don't like how I teach, you shouldn't've put me in a position to teach. But here's where you put me, so this is what you're getting. Sheesh.
Yeah, she was driving me nuts, too, but hey, I fell asleep at a temp job once, so I felt for her.
YOU'VE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME!!!
The Check Engine light's on again in my car.
The fucking goddamn Check Engine light.
The one I paid over $1,400 to not get it to light up again. (Yeah, 60% of it went to fixing the oil leaks in my engine, but it's still a lot of money.)
It went on on my way back from My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Division) home. I was scared that it would come back on, yet I had to prepare myself for it. And when it did, I screamed ... well, I screamed the title of this blog post.
My car seems to work fine. Well, it works better than before, at least now. There is no scary hesitation, nor there has yet been any inability to accelerate. And the white smoke is gone. But the fucking goddamn Check Engine light is back on again.
That can't be. Well, it can, because I checked it out once and the knock sensor (which I had replaced) was one of five codes that lit up. It might be one of the other four, or all the other four. Fuck if I know. But I might have to go back to O'Reilly's if it comes back on again tomorrow after work.
The fucking goddamn Check Engine light.
The one I paid over $1,400 to not get it to light up again. (Yeah, 60% of it went to fixing the oil leaks in my engine, but it's still a lot of money.)
It went on on my way back from My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Division) home. I was scared that it would come back on, yet I had to prepare myself for it. And when it did, I screamed ... well, I screamed the title of this blog post.
My car seems to work fine. Well, it works better than before, at least now. There is no scary hesitation, nor there has yet been any inability to accelerate. And the white smoke is gone. But the fucking goddamn Check Engine light is back on again.
That can't be. Well, it can, because I checked it out once and the knock sensor (which I had replaced) was one of five codes that lit up. It might be one of the other four, or all the other four. Fuck if I know. But I might have to go back to O'Reilly's if it comes back on again tomorrow after work.
Sunday, September 14, 2014
Working The Game
Another tense day working the Vikings game. Spouted off a number of yards gained that made no sense, and then I took off my headset to ask a question, something that I should not ever do.
But that was in the first half. I think they stopped yelling at me in the second half. So that makes me think they're happy with me. I mean, they asked me to check out some things and I did. I also corrected some things and noted a late fourth-down play. But after the game, when I sat down to eat and reflect and try to process the tension taking over my body, I realized that this would be the time when I would not be asked back. I keep thinking that I've done so awfully that I won't be asked back, yet I keep getting asked back for five years now, so I thus think that if I think I did well, that's when I'll be fired. I have to gird myself for that.
---
That asshole who tried to fire me was still there. Looked at me, probably remembered who I was, then didn't care that he was going to walk in front of me. I'm working here, you fat piece of shit. I may not be hired ever again, but I was hired to work this day, therefore you have to give me some respect. Fuck you, you fucking fuck.
---
Not only do I think I'll be fired, this guy with the production thinks he'll be fired, too. Something about his bosses leaving for the airport after the game.
I feel sorry for the guy. People like him in his position are put through the wringer for little pay. Had a little talk with him after the game, where he didn't know if he was going to have a job tomorrow. His position is basically stressful no matter which network you work for -- CBS, FOX, ESPN, or NBC. He took this job because the pay's a little better than the others; it's not middle-class, but it's more than I'm earning this year.
If this guy feels like he's losing his job, I can't be the only person feeling the pressure.
Confession: Scraped A Car At Work
Didn't mean to, I swear. It's just that my parents' driver's-side car just swung all the way open when I opened it only part way. I was trying to leave work when my 40 hours ended at 1:30, and I wanted to hit St. Paul so I could pay my health insurance premiums. And I was putting my bag on the passenger seat when I heard a scraping sound.
I look back and see that the door swung so wide that it practically wedged itself against the passenger-side door of the car to my left. I was hoping nothing would be permanent when I grabbed the door, but I had to use a little more force. Uh-oh. That's when I heard more scraping and, after I pulled the door towards me, I saw its mark, a vertical white mark with scraping marks to its left and right. And it is damn noticeable.
I looked at the car I hit. It's that of a liberal, if you go by the peace bumper stickers on it. So she (I'm guessing the owner's a she) won't get bent out of shape over getting her car damaged by someone who, ironically enough, she probably doesn't know yet may be sitting mere yards from her because he works with her. Wouldn't that drive you mad? I mean, you have a pool of suspects, yet from there you have no idea who the hell violated your vehicle. That would piss me off.
But it didn't happen to me; I was the one who did it. So what should I do? Uh, I ran like a little bitch. For one thing, I don't want to be on the hook for paying for getting that repaired. And for another, I had stuff I had to do. So after a few seconds of hemming and hawing, I quickly got in my car and left. I really am sorry, but it wasn't like I was going to leave a letter confessing what I did.
Oh my God, I'm such an asshole. But I didn't mean to do it! Why does it always seem as if one bad thing that happens to me is followed by one bad thing I do (which is always unintentional)? It's like it's karma, except that I didn't do anything to deserve it.
Well, what I'm going to do is drive my own car Monday. I'll use the van Tuesday, and if I get caught, well, I'll just feign ignorance -- "I don't think I hit anything, but did I hit your car? Oops. Sorry." The best that I can do.
I look back and see that the door swung so wide that it practically wedged itself against the passenger-side door of the car to my left. I was hoping nothing would be permanent when I grabbed the door, but I had to use a little more force. Uh-oh. That's when I heard more scraping and, after I pulled the door towards me, I saw its mark, a vertical white mark with scraping marks to its left and right. And it is damn noticeable.
I looked at the car I hit. It's that of a liberal, if you go by the peace bumper stickers on it. So she (I'm guessing the owner's a she) won't get bent out of shape over getting her car damaged by someone who, ironically enough, she probably doesn't know yet may be sitting mere yards from her because he works with her. Wouldn't that drive you mad? I mean, you have a pool of suspects, yet from there you have no idea who the hell violated your vehicle. That would piss me off.
But it didn't happen to me; I was the one who did it. So what should I do? Uh, I ran like a little bitch. For one thing, I don't want to be on the hook for paying for getting that repaired. And for another, I had stuff I had to do. So after a few seconds of hemming and hawing, I quickly got in my car and left. I really am sorry, but it wasn't like I was going to leave a letter confessing what I did.
Oh my God, I'm such an asshole. But I didn't mean to do it! Why does it always seem as if one bad thing that happens to me is followed by one bad thing I do (which is always unintentional)? It's like it's karma, except that I didn't do anything to deserve it.
Well, what I'm going to do is drive my own car Monday. I'll use the van Tuesday, and if I get caught, well, I'll just feign ignorance -- "I don't think I hit anything, but did I hit your car? Oops. Sorry." The best that I can do.
Saturday, September 13, 2014
Operation Harvesting Parents' Garden
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Friday, September 12, 2014
Bad Driver: 080 BHW or 080 BWH
Dark green car ... maybe a SUV, probably a domestic, but it looks old. He ran up my ass before he had to back down. Hey asshole, I tried moving aside for you as soon as I could, but that wasn't good enough for you by the way you gave me the finger on your way out. I hope to God that you die in car accident, you fucking asshole.
Yeah, My Car's Gonna Be The Death Of Me
Brought my car in Friday. Wanted to wait a while before I brought it into the mechanic Father trusts to take care of the Check Engine light. But I drove it and white smoke was coming out from under the hood, so I decided to take it to The Other Mechanic Around The Corner to take care of that, because I couldn't wait.
Turns out it was as bad as it could possible have been: The gaskets for the oil pan and the valve cover are leaking, which is the reason for the smoke. Swore I had The First Mechanic Around The Corner fix the valve cover gasket in the spring. But when I looked at the receipt, turns out that did not happen. Plus I thought the valve cover gasket was fixed a year ago by the mechanic Father trusts. Guess not. (Was told in a later phone call that that gasket was held in by screws that were screwed on only finger-tight, not ... uh, electronically.) That valve cover involves taking out the whole engine ... which just so happens to be the place where the knock sensors are, which is (I believe) the source of the Check Engine light. So, as long as they're going to be rooting around there, I told the mechanic, you might as well replace the knock sensors too.
No problem, the guy said -- that'll be about $1,500. And like a dumbass I immediately said yes. I love this car, love it so much it's going to kill me. But I can justify it this way: With so many things at work spinning out of my control and not being done the way I want it to be done, this was something that I think would be a problem taking care of by people I want to trust. I don't care if it took me a lot of money; at least something would break in my favor.
I walked down there Thursday and drove it -- to the Wendy's across the street, then a local strip mall to find rubber thumbs, then close to my house to fill up the car, then, finally, home. The taillight warning lights are still on (have to get the sockets fixed) and the low oil level light is still on (although I finally have a complete answer, I think: A mechanic pulled out the oil pan and saw that that sensor is broken -- like, literally broken). But so far, the Check Engine light has stayed off.
Now it's going to light up while driving to the soccer game tonight (Friday night). And I'm going to just laugh, laugh, laugh in my car because I pissed away $1,500.
Turns out it was as bad as it could possible have been: The gaskets for the oil pan and the valve cover are leaking, which is the reason for the smoke. Swore I had The First Mechanic Around The Corner fix the valve cover gasket in the spring. But when I looked at the receipt, turns out that did not happen. Plus I thought the valve cover gasket was fixed a year ago by the mechanic Father trusts. Guess not. (Was told in a later phone call that that gasket was held in by screws that were screwed on only finger-tight, not ... uh, electronically.) That valve cover involves taking out the whole engine ... which just so happens to be the place where the knock sensors are, which is (I believe) the source of the Check Engine light. So, as long as they're going to be rooting around there, I told the mechanic, you might as well replace the knock sensors too.
No problem, the guy said -- that'll be about $1,500. And like a dumbass I immediately said yes. I love this car, love it so much it's going to kill me. But I can justify it this way: With so many things at work spinning out of my control and not being done the way I want it to be done, this was something that I think would be a problem taking care of by people I want to trust. I don't care if it took me a lot of money; at least something would break in my favor.
I walked down there Thursday and drove it -- to the Wendy's across the street, then a local strip mall to find rubber thumbs, then close to my house to fill up the car, then, finally, home. The taillight warning lights are still on (have to get the sockets fixed) and the low oil level light is still on (although I finally have a complete answer, I think: A mechanic pulled out the oil pan and saw that that sensor is broken -- like, literally broken). But so far, the Check Engine light has stayed off.
Now it's going to light up while driving to the soccer game tonight (Friday night). And I'm going to just laugh, laugh, laugh in my car because I pissed away $1,500.
Thursday, September 11, 2014
Work Isn't Fun Anymore
Well, we missed the count for yet another day. I don't remember the last time we got the count right.
I stayed an extra hour tonight -- an extra goddamn hour, trying to figure out why in the hell the count's wrong. And it was useless because the root of the problem is something beyond my control or even my ability to unwind or account for. So I got out of work at 7. People on salaries get out of work at 7, and I am not salaried.
Man, my boss (one of many I have this season) is gonna be pissed. I think I was skating on thin ice before; this time I may fall through. I appreciate her giving me a chance, and I don't think this is my fault, but I think I've burned through all my currency with her. Tomorrow morning's gonna be hell.
And that's when a whole new group of people start work. And guess what? I'll be the one teaching them! I did a shitty job with the first wave of people, and I've been so preoccupied with the count that I haven't had time to think about what to tell these people. They're gonna hate me, just like the first wave.
You know what? I miss my last temp job. The one downtown, the one that paid $7.99 an hour. It didn't pay shit, but all I had to do was go in, correct some forms, and leave. I could work at my own pace, I didn't have to take any shit, didn't get any negative feedback from my boss, and I was left alone. That is absolute bliss compared to what I have to deal with now. Sure I got paid peanuts, but it was stress-free. In fact, it was a total joy to go in and work there. I miss that place now. I really fucking do.
I stayed an extra hour tonight -- an extra goddamn hour, trying to figure out why in the hell the count's wrong. And it was useless because the root of the problem is something beyond my control or even my ability to unwind or account for. So I got out of work at 7. People on salaries get out of work at 7, and I am not salaried.
Man, my boss (one of many I have this season) is gonna be pissed. I think I was skating on thin ice before; this time I may fall through. I appreciate her giving me a chance, and I don't think this is my fault, but I think I've burned through all my currency with her. Tomorrow morning's gonna be hell.
And that's when a whole new group of people start work. And guess what? I'll be the one teaching them! I did a shitty job with the first wave of people, and I've been so preoccupied with the count that I haven't had time to think about what to tell these people. They're gonna hate me, just like the first wave.
You know what? I miss my last temp job. The one downtown, the one that paid $7.99 an hour. It didn't pay shit, but all I had to do was go in, correct some forms, and leave. I could work at my own pace, I didn't have to take any shit, didn't get any negative feedback from my boss, and I was left alone. That is absolute bliss compared to what I have to deal with now. Sure I got paid peanuts, but it was stress-free. In fact, it was a total joy to go in and work there. I miss that place now. I really fucking do.
Wednesday, September 10, 2014
The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey
#-1: Vikings (Re-Entry!). So far, so good. In fact, is it possible this is the most impressive Week 1 victory in recent years? Yes, it's the Bastard Cleveland-By-Way-Of-Los Angeles Rams, they lost their starting Quarterback before the season began and lost the backup at halftime, but 1) it was on the road, 2) it ostensibly has a fearsome defense (and yes, it didn't come out that way), and 3) this is the ViQueens -- did you really think they'd be able to dominate a hurt, demoralized team?
This win is what good teams do to bad teams -- take them out, utterly and firmly. There was a professionalism in the way the Vikes handled St. Louis that I hadn't really seen since they went on that four-game run to reach the last playoffs they've been in. Could it be the coaching? Hope so -- Mike Zimmer has inspired these guys and made them guys accountable.
Moreover, the offense has found a creative streak. All the hype surrounding Cordarrelle Patterson was backed up by that quicksilver end-around for a touchdown. It's possible, very possible, that the offense will now revolve around him and not Adrian Peterson. Norv Turner may have had a sketchy track record as a Head Coach, but the Peter Principle may prove that being an Offensive Coodinator is where he excels.
This Sunday they play at TCF Bank Stadium for a two-year bit while Metrodome v.2.0. is being built. They play the New England Patriots, which suddenly looks extremely vulnerable after getting infiltrated repeatedly in their loss at Miami. The defense had a very good game in Week 1, and they could repeat that feat against a franchise held up by many as the best in the National Football League.
#-2: Gopher football (Last Week: -2). They are undefeated for the year -- and this time, they actually beat an opponent in the same class as them. Well, maybe not exactly; Middle Tennessee St. is in the "Group of Five" perjorative that separates them from Minnesota, a member of the "Power Five." (I tried using the term "BcS Five," but I think everybody else wants to retire the letters "BcS" forever more.) But at least they are in top-flight college football, at least technically. What isn't good is that the Goofs squandered a 28-0 halftime lead by surrendering 17 points in the third quarter, and they had to survive the Blue Raiders, 35-24. They almost wasted David Cobb's 220 yards and two TDs on a loss. They also almost lost starting QB Mitch Leidner on a roll-up injury, but it looks like he'll be ready for the next game ... which will be at TCU, a team from the "BcS Five" this Saturday afternoon. I've got a feeling they won't be undefeated after this game.
#-3: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: -4). There is something seriously, seriously wrong with this team. Sure, they won all three games of the Yale Tournament over the weekend. But the teams they beat include the Bulldogs and Albany. And the other "marquee" name in the tourney, Boston College, they had to go the distance to beat. Worse than that, they dropped the first two sets in the match. Worst of all, they lost the first set, get this, 25-12. For that reason alone they actually dropped a spot in the AVCA Top 25 poll from 18 to 19. Gophers teams of old would destroy the competition and not drop a set. What the fuck is going on?
They come home to host their annual Diet Coke Classic. Like the Yale Tournament it includes two tomato cans (Tulsa and Wisconsin-Milwaukee) and a reputable program in Iowa St. If they're not careful, they're going to lose that game to the Cyclones. Hell, I'll just say it now: They will lose to the Clones. And the first real serious questions of the direction of this program will be raised.
#-4: Twins (Last Week: -3). Yeah, this club finds new lows. It's a 2-4 week, but those four losses all came at home over the weekend to the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim Angels of Los Angels of Anaheim Angels Of ..., where they were close the first few games and even had leads but finally laid down with a 14-4 defeat on Sunday. (A couple sports dignitaries noted that on Sunday, the Vikings did not surrender a touchdown while the Twinks gave up two.) They did win in a blowout over Chicago (which was the last game of the series and thus averted a sweep, natch) and they held on to win a close on in Cleveland, but there is no way this squad is even in the same, well, ballpark as the best teams in Major League Baseball. This week: They finish their three-game set in Cleveland, spend the weekend against the White Sox in Comiskey, then come home to start a three-game series against Detroit on Monday.
#-5: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -1). Yes, it's the first weekend of September, but it's possible (there goes me overusing that word again) the U. vagina ballers played themselves out of the NCAA Tournament after getting swept in SEC country over the weekend. On Friday they choked on a 2-0 lead on back-to-back tallies by Ole Miss' Olivia Harrison three minutes apart, then lost the game in the 107th by, who else, Olivia Harrison. If a player turns a hat trick on you, it's not good.
They lost blowout instead of choke style Sunday afternoon, 3-1 to Auburn. Those results meant that the writer Chris Henderson of women's soccer blog All White Kit threw the U. out of his project tournament field. Can they turn it around as they start Big Ten play on the road against Michigan and Michigan St.?
This win is what good teams do to bad teams -- take them out, utterly and firmly. There was a professionalism in the way the Vikes handled St. Louis that I hadn't really seen since they went on that four-game run to reach the last playoffs they've been in. Could it be the coaching? Hope so -- Mike Zimmer has inspired these guys and made them guys accountable.
Moreover, the offense has found a creative streak. All the hype surrounding Cordarrelle Patterson was backed up by that quicksilver end-around for a touchdown. It's possible, very possible, that the offense will now revolve around him and not Adrian Peterson. Norv Turner may have had a sketchy track record as a Head Coach, but the Peter Principle may prove that being an Offensive Coodinator is where he excels.
This Sunday they play at TCF Bank Stadium for a two-year bit while Metrodome v.2.0. is being built. They play the New England Patriots, which suddenly looks extremely vulnerable after getting infiltrated repeatedly in their loss at Miami. The defense had a very good game in Week 1, and they could repeat that feat against a franchise held up by many as the best in the National Football League.
#-2: Gopher football (Last Week: -2). They are undefeated for the year -- and this time, they actually beat an opponent in the same class as them. Well, maybe not exactly; Middle Tennessee St. is in the "Group of Five" perjorative that separates them from Minnesota, a member of the "Power Five." (I tried using the term "BcS Five," but I think everybody else wants to retire the letters "BcS" forever more.) But at least they are in top-flight college football, at least technically. What isn't good is that the Goofs squandered a 28-0 halftime lead by surrendering 17 points in the third quarter, and they had to survive the Blue Raiders, 35-24. They almost wasted David Cobb's 220 yards and two TDs on a loss. They also almost lost starting QB Mitch Leidner on a roll-up injury, but it looks like he'll be ready for the next game ... which will be at TCU, a team from the "BcS Five" this Saturday afternoon. I've got a feeling they won't be undefeated after this game.
#-3: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: -4). There is something seriously, seriously wrong with this team. Sure, they won all three games of the Yale Tournament over the weekend. But the teams they beat include the Bulldogs and Albany. And the other "marquee" name in the tourney, Boston College, they had to go the distance to beat. Worse than that, they dropped the first two sets in the match. Worst of all, they lost the first set, get this, 25-12. For that reason alone they actually dropped a spot in the AVCA Top 25 poll from 18 to 19. Gophers teams of old would destroy the competition and not drop a set. What the fuck is going on?
They come home to host their annual Diet Coke Classic. Like the Yale Tournament it includes two tomato cans (Tulsa and Wisconsin-Milwaukee) and a reputable program in Iowa St. If they're not careful, they're going to lose that game to the Cyclones. Hell, I'll just say it now: They will lose to the Clones. And the first real serious questions of the direction of this program will be raised.
#-4: Twins (Last Week: -3). Yeah, this club finds new lows. It's a 2-4 week, but those four losses all came at home over the weekend to the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim Angels of Los Angels of Anaheim Angels Of ..., where they were close the first few games and even had leads but finally laid down with a 14-4 defeat on Sunday. (A couple sports dignitaries noted that on Sunday, the Vikings did not surrender a touchdown while the Twinks gave up two.) They did win in a blowout over Chicago (which was the last game of the series and thus averted a sweep, natch) and they held on to win a close on in Cleveland, but there is no way this squad is even in the same, well, ballpark as the best teams in Major League Baseball. This week: They finish their three-game set in Cleveland, spend the weekend against the White Sox in Comiskey, then come home to start a three-game series against Detroit on Monday.
#-5: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -1). Yes, it's the first weekend of September, but it's possible (there goes me overusing that word again) the U. vagina ballers played themselves out of the NCAA Tournament after getting swept in SEC country over the weekend. On Friday they choked on a 2-0 lead on back-to-back tallies by Ole Miss' Olivia Harrison three minutes apart, then lost the game in the 107th by, who else, Olivia Harrison. If a player turns a hat trick on you, it's not good.
They lost blowout instead of choke style Sunday afternoon, 3-1 to Auburn. Those results meant that the writer Chris Henderson of women's soccer blog All White Kit threw the U. out of his project tournament field. Can they turn it around as they start Big Ten play on the road against Michigan and Michigan St.?
Tuesday, September 9, 2014
Three Things From Work
1) I don't realize this now, in my tired state, but my other boss when it comes to this new job kind of went off on me. The count was wrong this morning, and I can tell that she was tired of continuing trying to tell me how important getting the numbers right is, and she just started tearing me down. I don't equate it to what The Asshole said because -- well, now that I think about it, they both were yelling at me, but for her I don't consider it "yelling" because a) she, unlike him, explained how vital my task is, and b) well, she's a woman and any female that's not Mother is someone I don't fear as much as I do a man. So I didn't get that asshole-clenching fear that I got when The Asshole screamed at me out of nowhere.
Oh, and besides, later the discrepancy was found; it was on a list that I hadn't received before reconciling the count. In fact, I didn't even know of its existence when the count was made. That solved all of our problems. And later, she admitted that what happened wasn't really my fault, and after that (late in the day when I should have been long gone) we kind of talked. So I guess things are all good.
2) The past two seasons I was in a position with other people where I would see some of them not come back the next day because their numbers were too low. Now that I'm in a different position, I see the flipside: Seeing people leave and then being told by my boss that some of them have been cut.
That happened today. Of the four billers who came on, my boss, a mere 15 minutes after they left for the day, told me that two of them weren't coming back. One of them I could see; he was working way too slow and deliberately to stick around. The other was kind of a surprise; he seemed to be getting it, but apparently he was working too slow for my boss's liking. I think he should be given a second chance because he seemed, in my opinion more than the other three, to understand the mistakes he made and did his best to make up for them. He should not be penalized for that.
The thing that sucks is that the two who were let go were people I liked. The two people who stayed, even though their numbers are good, are the ones that are giving me attitude. I could see that when I said goodbye to them. The woman (who, just between you and me, is giving me a lot of eye-rolling attitude) didn't even look my way on her way out. (I will say, however, that the really nice guy who was going to get fired didn't even look at me either; he probably knew that was the last time he was working there.) The guy barely turned his head to mutter a "Bye" when I said farewell to him. This guy is containing his frustration, but barely.
This job has such a steep learning curve. We give you a shit ton of information, we then give you (IMHO) the worst packets to work on, then we give you a week to reach 300. I remember that each of the past two seasons I had to work through lunch in order to reach that. Once you reach that quota one day, you're golden. None of the four have reached that, and I don't think it's any mystery that we did not do as good of a job of explaining what to do. That's what happens when you fire the guy who's done this for seven years. My boss was really disappointed, but he decided to stick with the two who were sort of close to 300 in the belief that once we get to the easier envelopes, they'll top the mark.
Too bad it's the two assholes that are sticking around.
3) Speaking of assholes, I now flinch around The Asshole. I try not to even look at him when he passes me by; he probably prefers it that way. But for some reason, Monday was the day that whenever I sensed his presence my heart rate went up and I make sure I don't make eye contact with him. I hope to God he doesn't fucking notice, that Asshole.
I need to get over this bullshit.
Oh, and besides, later the discrepancy was found; it was on a list that I hadn't received before reconciling the count. In fact, I didn't even know of its existence when the count was made. That solved all of our problems. And later, she admitted that what happened wasn't really my fault, and after that (late in the day when I should have been long gone) we kind of talked. So I guess things are all good.
2) The past two seasons I was in a position with other people where I would see some of them not come back the next day because their numbers were too low. Now that I'm in a different position, I see the flipside: Seeing people leave and then being told by my boss that some of them have been cut.
That happened today. Of the four billers who came on, my boss, a mere 15 minutes after they left for the day, told me that two of them weren't coming back. One of them I could see; he was working way too slow and deliberately to stick around. The other was kind of a surprise; he seemed to be getting it, but apparently he was working too slow for my boss's liking. I think he should be given a second chance because he seemed, in my opinion more than the other three, to understand the mistakes he made and did his best to make up for them. He should not be penalized for that.
The thing that sucks is that the two who were let go were people I liked. The two people who stayed, even though their numbers are good, are the ones that are giving me attitude. I could see that when I said goodbye to them. The woman (who, just between you and me, is giving me a lot of eye-rolling attitude) didn't even look my way on her way out. (I will say, however, that the really nice guy who was going to get fired didn't even look at me either; he probably knew that was the last time he was working there.) The guy barely turned his head to mutter a "Bye" when I said farewell to him. This guy is containing his frustration, but barely.
This job has such a steep learning curve. We give you a shit ton of information, we then give you (IMHO) the worst packets to work on, then we give you a week to reach 300. I remember that each of the past two seasons I had to work through lunch in order to reach that. Once you reach that quota one day, you're golden. None of the four have reached that, and I don't think it's any mystery that we did not do as good of a job of explaining what to do. That's what happens when you fire the guy who's done this for seven years. My boss was really disappointed, but he decided to stick with the two who were sort of close to 300 in the belief that once we get to the easier envelopes, they'll top the mark.
Too bad it's the two assholes that are sticking around.
3) Speaking of assholes, I now flinch around The Asshole. I try not to even look at him when he passes me by; he probably prefers it that way. But for some reason, Monday was the day that whenever I sensed his presence my heart rate went up and I make sure I don't make eye contact with him. I hope to God he doesn't fucking notice, that Asshole.
I need to get over this bullshit.
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