So there's a guy at work who I spoke to a lot when we were in the same room. Nice guy, really smart ... and a Republican. When we talked about politics he was very candid in how he stood. So, when he said he approved of Scott Walker busting the unions in Wisconsin even though he is in a union himself, I appreciated his forthrightness, if not his logic.
This morning, while I was getting coffee, I overheard his distinct voice. He was talking about the $420 million Powerball jackpot just was just won by, like, 20 office workers, I think, in Tennessee. I didn't get the whole gist of what he said, but one phrase stood out, and I don't think context makes it sound any better: "Watch -- lower- and middle-income people will just spend all that money."
WTF?!?!?! That's ... classist? Is that a word? And even if he believes that (and he shouldn't), what made him think that was something you could say loud enough for people getting coffee to overhear? Maybe an opinion like that is controversial. Maybe.
No, I'm not going to call him out on it. We work separately now, doesn't matter.
Wednesday, November 30, 2016
The Most Fun I Had Without Cumming?
Well, I went to a party Monday night. It's the first time in a long time I've been to a stripper party, so I thought I would give myself a treat. Besides, *a*** was there, and she was sooooooooooooooooooooo good to me last time.
Well, *a*** went beyond that this time around. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay beyond. She said she would give me a blowjob right in front of everybody in the dining room, then she threw me around in our locked bedroom and had her way with me. Sort of.
OK, the good part first. She sucked me off, big time, violently. But then she did something else: She dug her nose into my ... um, my down there place. You know? The area between my dick-and-balls and my asshole. There. She started licking me there. OMFG! My down there place is icky. Sure, I showered the night before, so it could have been dirtier. But with all the sitting down and moisture and shit trapped inbetween my clothes, not to mention sitting down all day, it gets pretty fucking nasty. Plus I don't manscape, so I've got hairs all over the goddamn place there. Nope, doesn't bother *a***! She buried her head in there and lashed my tongue all over. She may have even licked my butthole!! Gross -- and so fucking hot!!!
That she surprised me by doing all this kinky shit makes me absolutely ecstatic. And yet I didn't ejaculate. Don't know why -- we talked for a bit, then she just ... stopped. Said we ran out of songs. Ran out of songs? The fuck? Why would she ruin the mood like that? And so I kind of put up a fight, and she argued back, but then I gave her $100 and that was it.
We exchanged phone numbers. She allowed me to friend her on Facebook, too. I know her by a different name than the one she uses (or is?) on fb, but once I knew who she was there I remembered that Facebook "recommended" me to her. Oh, so that's who she is! Texted her late Monday; haven't heard back. Said that she's willing to do more shit at her place closer to the holidays, and at the same price. That's great ... and I'd love to set a firm commitment as soon as she texts back.
Hope I cum then. But, hey, as far as sexual encounters that didn't end up with me jizzing all over the place, *a*** may be the tops!
Well, *a*** went beyond that this time around. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay beyond. She said she would give me a blowjob right in front of everybody in the dining room, then she threw me around in our locked bedroom and had her way with me. Sort of.
OK, the good part first. She sucked me off, big time, violently. But then she did something else: She dug her nose into my ... um, my down there place. You know? The area between my dick-and-balls and my asshole. There. She started licking me there. OMFG! My down there place is icky. Sure, I showered the night before, so it could have been dirtier. But with all the sitting down and moisture and shit trapped inbetween my clothes, not to mention sitting down all day, it gets pretty fucking nasty. Plus I don't manscape, so I've got hairs all over the goddamn place there. Nope, doesn't bother *a***! She buried her head in there and lashed my tongue all over. She may have even licked my butthole!! Gross -- and so fucking hot!!!
That she surprised me by doing all this kinky shit makes me absolutely ecstatic. And yet I didn't ejaculate. Don't know why -- we talked for a bit, then she just ... stopped. Said we ran out of songs. Ran out of songs? The fuck? Why would she ruin the mood like that? And so I kind of put up a fight, and she argued back, but then I gave her $100 and that was it.
We exchanged phone numbers. She allowed me to friend her on Facebook, too. I know her by a different name than the one she uses (or is?) on fb, but once I knew who she was there I remembered that Facebook "recommended" me to her. Oh, so that's who she is! Texted her late Monday; haven't heard back. Said that she's willing to do more shit at her place closer to the holidays, and at the same price. That's great ... and I'd love to set a firm commitment as soon as she texts back.
Hope I cum then. But, hey, as far as sexual encounters that didn't end up with me jizzing all over the place, *a*** may be the tops!
Tuesday, November 29, 2016
My Back
My back has been hurting me for some time. I don't really know when it started to act up, although I think the first inklings of my pain there happened when I was doing a test scoring project; to refocus myself I would get up and go to the bathroom, but my back would force my attention to stretching out my back.
Lately, though (and I'm sorry, but I can't give you an accurate timeline on "lately"), my back has been really hurting. Whenever I get out of bed in the morning. Whenever I get up from my work chair. Whenever I get up from my lunchtime nap. And whenever I get up from sitting on my bed after working on my laptop on it. It's really bad. And I have to be honest: I didn't think it was that bad, that really bad, until a couple days ago. Really I thought that it was a phase and that it'll pass, or it was just a sign of my advancing age, but not only has my back pain stuck around, it's gotten worse.
I figured it would just go away because I have accumulated bad habits. I think one big thing I've done more often is work on my laptop while sitting up in my bed -- like I'm doing now as I write this (at least this part of the blog post). It forces me to hunch towards the lap screen, and that seems to put a lot of pressure on the small of my back. That may be the sole cause that accelerated the back pain from what it was over the summer. And it is not getting better because I, obviously, am continuing to lean toward. And not for nothing, whenever I work on my bed, I oftentimes don't cross my legs in front of me. Rather, I splay out my right leg on the outside. Could that have something to do with it, like I'm maligning my spine?
Regardless, I don't know exactly if that's the cause. It could be from me sleeping on my bed. Don't exactly know how I could suddenly develop back pain sleeping on a mattress I've had for several years now. I flipped it over in October, but ... that can't be it, can it? And I hope to Buddha I don't have this pain because I sleep too much, because then My Father is going to use that against me.
And I also wonder if I somehow slipped a disc or something. Because I have never felt so much pain in my back from standing up from a seated or a lying position ever before. That this irritation came on relatively suddenly would make you think that something drastic happened. But I've not been in an accident or a fight or anything. It just hurts like a mother.
Finally, not to sound too conspiratorial, but I think other parts of my body are unduly hurting, too. For example, starting last (Monday) night my fingers and arms felt a little tingly. Also, I have felt some pangs from my hip. Finally, my chest continues to beat conspicuously, ever since I shoveled last week. It might be the caffeine, it might be something else.
I don't know what to do. I've tried standing up. My boss tried to crack my back twice. I've been told by my boss to get a foam roller. I'll try to get to a masseuse soon. Maybe I should try yoga. I should definitely see a doctor about this while I have time and before Trump dismantles Obamacare.
All I'm saying is, if I die, just remember I said this.
Lately, though (and I'm sorry, but I can't give you an accurate timeline on "lately"), my back has been really hurting. Whenever I get out of bed in the morning. Whenever I get up from my work chair. Whenever I get up from my lunchtime nap. And whenever I get up from sitting on my bed after working on my laptop on it. It's really bad. And I have to be honest: I didn't think it was that bad, that really bad, until a couple days ago. Really I thought that it was a phase and that it'll pass, or it was just a sign of my advancing age, but not only has my back pain stuck around, it's gotten worse.
I figured it would just go away because I have accumulated bad habits. I think one big thing I've done more often is work on my laptop while sitting up in my bed -- like I'm doing now as I write this (at least this part of the blog post). It forces me to hunch towards the lap screen, and that seems to put a lot of pressure on the small of my back. That may be the sole cause that accelerated the back pain from what it was over the summer. And it is not getting better because I, obviously, am continuing to lean toward. And not for nothing, whenever I work on my bed, I oftentimes don't cross my legs in front of me. Rather, I splay out my right leg on the outside. Could that have something to do with it, like I'm maligning my spine?
Regardless, I don't know exactly if that's the cause. It could be from me sleeping on my bed. Don't exactly know how I could suddenly develop back pain sleeping on a mattress I've had for several years now. I flipped it over in October, but ... that can't be it, can it? And I hope to Buddha I don't have this pain because I sleep too much, because then My Father is going to use that against me.
And I also wonder if I somehow slipped a disc or something. Because I have never felt so much pain in my back from standing up from a seated or a lying position ever before. That this irritation came on relatively suddenly would make you think that something drastic happened. But I've not been in an accident or a fight or anything. It just hurts like a mother.
Finally, not to sound too conspiratorial, but I think other parts of my body are unduly hurting, too. For example, starting last (Monday) night my fingers and arms felt a little tingly. Also, I have felt some pangs from my hip. Finally, my chest continues to beat conspicuously, ever since I shoveled last week. It might be the caffeine, it might be something else.
I don't know what to do. I've tried standing up. My boss tried to crack my back twice. I've been told by my boss to get a foam roller. I'll try to get to a masseuse soon. Maybe I should try yoga. I should definitely see a doctor about this while I have time and before Trump dismantles Obamacare.
All I'm saying is, if I die, just remember I said this.
Monday, November 28, 2016
I Have Never Felt Like More Of A Liar Than Just Now
So I just left work early in order to pick up these cereal samples that me and my "two kids" are supposed to eat and answer questions. This even though I don't have any kids.
These aren't single-size boxes; these are regular-size, two of them, and I was given a very big bag to carry them. That only makes the size of my lie larger. So, after I read through the instructions to make sure I wouldn't get caught cheating or anything (no live videochats with anyone -- I am supposed to record "their" opinions on paper and later punch them in online), I got out of there with the quickness.
This might be the last time I ever fill out a survey that involves children in the household. I don't know how long I can keep up the ruse, even if it does give me money.
These aren't single-size boxes; these are regular-size, two of them, and I was given a very big bag to carry them. That only makes the size of my lie larger. So, after I read through the instructions to make sure I wouldn't get caught cheating or anything (no live videochats with anyone -- I am supposed to record "their" opinions on paper and later punch them in online), I got out of there with the quickness.
This might be the last time I ever fill out a survey that involves children in the household. I don't know how long I can keep up the ruse, even if it does give me money.
Mother The Food Hoarder
So I'm supposed to leave an hour early for work later today (Monday; I'll make up for it by staying late tomorrow and Wednesday) to pick up some cereal from this taste test company. I'm supposed to try it for a couple days, then send back my opinions on them later in the week. I get a debit card worth $75 in the mail thereafter.
So, assuming I don't lie about it, I have at least a few days of eating cereal, which I probably will do late at night. That doesn't bode well for my body, seeing as I still have to eat dinner with my parents in the evening. The cereal will then qualify as a late-night snack, assuming I don't get sick of it.
In preparation for the cereal I'm picking up tomorrow (I decided to not eat tonight/Monday night; it was ostensibly to go to a house party, but my parents want me to do some things for them at the library, so I'm not sure if I can rock out with my cock out), I took a quick look around the kitchen, just in case there was a place where I could stash the cereal boxes. They already have cereal, though, tons, and I can't think of a good excuse where I would have brought home even more cereal. So, into the closet they go.
But I noticed a lot of other things. For example, my parents (or, more likely, Mother) has two big boxes of croissants out on the kitchen counter. I then open up the fridge and see everything stacked with leftovers from the Chinese restaurant at which the family had Thanksgiving. Then I remember the bananas that are rotting in the living room ... and the bananas we bought at the Chinese grocery store Mother had us stop by at on the way to the Chinese restaurant on Thanksgiving. And then I am reminded again that Mother buys a lot of food, most of which we won't eat. It's been like that forever, and I don't know why that is. It's just going to go to waste, unless they figure out a way to eat them themselves, and I doubt that they do. And I can't help them because I'm just going to get fat -- like I probably am now and I probably will be with this damn cereal I have to eat in order to make $75.
I need to go work out more, especially on weeknights. Just need to control myself and not eat at Taco Bell after I get done exercising.
So, assuming I don't lie about it, I have at least a few days of eating cereal, which I probably will do late at night. That doesn't bode well for my body, seeing as I still have to eat dinner with my parents in the evening. The cereal will then qualify as a late-night snack, assuming I don't get sick of it.
In preparation for the cereal I'm picking up tomorrow (I decided to not eat tonight/Monday night; it was ostensibly to go to a house party, but my parents want me to do some things for them at the library, so I'm not sure if I can rock out with my cock out), I took a quick look around the kitchen, just in case there was a place where I could stash the cereal boxes. They already have cereal, though, tons, and I can't think of a good excuse where I would have brought home even more cereal. So, into the closet they go.
But I noticed a lot of other things. For example, my parents (or, more likely, Mother) has two big boxes of croissants out on the kitchen counter. I then open up the fridge and see everything stacked with leftovers from the Chinese restaurant at which the family had Thanksgiving. Then I remember the bananas that are rotting in the living room ... and the bananas we bought at the Chinese grocery store Mother had us stop by at on the way to the Chinese restaurant on Thanksgiving. And then I am reminded again that Mother buys a lot of food, most of which we won't eat. It's been like that forever, and I don't know why that is. It's just going to go to waste, unless they figure out a way to eat them themselves, and I doubt that they do. And I can't help them because I'm just going to get fat -- like I probably am now and I probably will be with this damn cereal I have to eat in order to make $75.
I need to go work out more, especially on weeknights. Just need to control myself and not eat at Taco Bell after I get done exercising.
Sunday, November 27, 2016
To Be Challenged
Yeah, you go on Facebook to talk about politics, and you get challenged. Why do I have to get challenged?
I post the recent revelation that there has been a recount requested in the state of Wisconsin. So I get a response from this guy, who I know through the alumni club, asking, I think, what is the nature of the recount. From his postings in the past, I know he is a Republican, so I do my best to know my shit before I post, and if I don't, I say that I don't.
The bad thing about the Internet is that you still can't tell tone. This morning I get a response from him to my response, imploring me to "do my research." I don't know how I'm supposed to take that. Does he mean that in a friendly way or ... not? My friend seems to think he's being an asshole, and she said just that in the comments.
So I don't know how to take this. Right now I'm researching the hell out of his question in the hopes of getting back on top of this. He may be engaging me in an honest and open conversation, or he could be challenging me. Have no idea.
I post the recent revelation that there has been a recount requested in the state of Wisconsin. So I get a response from this guy, who I know through the alumni club, asking, I think, what is the nature of the recount. From his postings in the past, I know he is a Republican, so I do my best to know my shit before I post, and if I don't, I say that I don't.
The bad thing about the Internet is that you still can't tell tone. This morning I get a response from him to my response, imploring me to "do my research." I don't know how I'm supposed to take that. Does he mean that in a friendly way or ... not? My friend seems to think he's being an asshole, and she said just that in the comments.
So I don't know how to take this. Right now I'm researching the hell out of his question in the hopes of getting back on top of this. He may be engaging me in an honest and open conversation, or he could be challenging me. Have no idea.
Saturday, November 26, 2016
No Politics Around The Game, Please
So my alma mater's final game is this afternoon. Fueled by that, the team's seven-game winning streak and that it is Thanksgiving Weekend, I am expected a few more people than we usually get. We could break double digits. Fingers crossed.
One of the guys, though, is a diehard Trump fan. He's been touting Trump ever since he became the Republican nominee. Frankly, he's been pretty fucking annoying about it on Facebook. (Aside: He is Jewish, and Trump has just hired as his right-hand man a noted anti-Semite. I don't get Republicans.) But he's a diehard alum and, even though I haven't seen him yet this year, I consider him one of the most "active" members of the chapter.
It'll be nice to see him again. Really. He is really interested in the football team, and although some of his ideas are cockamamie, he is very knowledgeable about the team, I am sure of it. I just hope to Buddha and God and Allah and all other deities above that he doesn't. Bring. Up. Trump. I have no reason to believe that he will, but frankly, since this election has happened in a way that has never really happened before, and knowing that he is fervently pro-Trump, I'm really scared that he's just going to start talking about it during the game.
I also concerned about another scenario which I think has a slightly greater chance of happening. There is another member of the club who I don't ever remember seeing. She was a diehard Hillary Clinton fan. She even volunteered and canvassed in the Philadelphia area. So she must be heartbroken that the Enemies Around Us decided to fuck ourselves and this country in the ass. I'm very scared that she'll start talking about the election. I only say that there's a slightly greater chance of that happening because I don't remember seeing her at all, and therefore I don't know her enough to believe that she will keep politics out of the game.
As President, I have to be diplomatic and keep the peace. I am hoping -- assuming -- that the members will behave themselves and keep today's conversation just to the game. But what if someone makes a passive-aggressive comment? What if he comes in wearing a Trump t-shirt? What happens if she starts talking about the recount filed in Wisconsin or something? And, more importantly, what will I do about it? And, moreover, what happens if they ignore me asking them to stop talking about politics during the game? What will I have to do then?
I just hope that no one fucking talks about politics this afternoon.
One of the guys, though, is a diehard Trump fan. He's been touting Trump ever since he became the Republican nominee. Frankly, he's been pretty fucking annoying about it on Facebook. (Aside: He is Jewish, and Trump has just hired as his right-hand man a noted anti-Semite. I don't get Republicans.) But he's a diehard alum and, even though I haven't seen him yet this year, I consider him one of the most "active" members of the chapter.
It'll be nice to see him again. Really. He is really interested in the football team, and although some of his ideas are cockamamie, he is very knowledgeable about the team, I am sure of it. I just hope to Buddha and God and Allah and all other deities above that he doesn't. Bring. Up. Trump. I have no reason to believe that he will, but frankly, since this election has happened in a way that has never really happened before, and knowing that he is fervently pro-Trump, I'm really scared that he's just going to start talking about it during the game.
I also concerned about another scenario which I think has a slightly greater chance of happening. There is another member of the club who I don't ever remember seeing. She was a diehard Hillary Clinton fan. She even volunteered and canvassed in the Philadelphia area. So she must be heartbroken that the Enemies Around Us decided to fuck ourselves and this country in the ass. I'm very scared that she'll start talking about the election. I only say that there's a slightly greater chance of that happening because I don't remember seeing her at all, and therefore I don't know her enough to believe that she will keep politics out of the game.
As President, I have to be diplomatic and keep the peace. I am hoping -- assuming -- that the members will behave themselves and keep today's conversation just to the game. But what if someone makes a passive-aggressive comment? What if he comes in wearing a Trump t-shirt? What happens if she starts talking about the recount filed in Wisconsin or something? And, more importantly, what will I do about it? And, moreover, what happens if they ignore me asking them to stop talking about politics during the game? What will I have to do then?
I just hope that no one fucking talks about politics this afternoon.
Friday, November 25, 2016
The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey
Positive Numbers: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: 0). I should put this part of the volleyball team's schedule in more proper, and more hyperventilating, terms. This may be The Hardest Portion Of A Schedule This Program Has Ever Faced. Yes, this team is playing their final four games of the regular season at the Sports Pavilion. But they arguably host the four best teams in the Big Ten Conference, including the clubs ranked first and third.
And they've won the first three. My God, they did it. It wasn't easy, however. Over the weekend they went up by two sets to both Michigan St. and Michigan, but were pushed to the full five sets before winning. The stress of putting away the Spartans and Wolverines seemed to have caught up with them Dranksgiving Night, when #1 Nebraska took the first two sets. I was at the game, and when the U. was up in Set 2 21-17 but then allowed an 8-1 run to the Cornhuskers to go up two-sets-to-none, I tweeted, "Game over."
I was checking my phone for Set 3. I didn't realize that Nebraska had the Gophers 23-20 and poised for the sweep. But, somehow (I don't remember, I still was preoccupied with my smart), they took the Huskers to extra points and pulled out the set, 28-26. That's when the team and the match got my attention back. The U. stormed out to a big lead in Set 4, and while Nebraska battled back, they took the set at 17. So it was a hell of a match where both teams seemed to have been spent coming back from huge deficits. And yet, somehow, Minnesota took Set 5, 17-15, when a Cornhusker was dubiously called for double-contact. The epic comeback was complete. The U. broke Nebraska's winning streak at 14. And they are still in the running not only for a piece of a second straight conference title but also the #1 overall seed in the NCAA Tournament.
Still, they have one final contest: Senior Night Saturday night against third-ranked Wisconsin. There's a very real possibility that the U. has run out of gas to finish the season. In fact, all this gauntlet-throwing and character-revealing makes me scared that the team is running on fumes and has nothing for the tournament. Well, we'll see when we get there. In the meantime, I have to enjoy what may be the most incredible volleyball match I've ever seen, stopped paying attention to, and then paid attention to again.
#0: Gopher men's basketball (Last Week: -1). Last year's squad is an extremely low bar; after all, they racked up the worst record in program history. So it wouldn't take much to improve on that team.
I saw this club in back-to-back games this week, and so far, so good. Friday's Gavitt Tipoff Game vs. St. John's was the dicey one. They were trailing big throughout much of the first half, roared to a double-digit lead till about midway through the second half, and had to survive a hot-shooting Red Storm team to win, 92-86. On Tuesday against Arkansas, they were trailing until Razorback Head Coach Mike Anderson decided to implement his "Forty Minutes Of Hell" gameplan and started speeding up the contest. Somehow, that's when the Gophers started playing their best. They destroyed Arkansas, 85-71, and it really wasn't that close.
The big difference between this year and last is, of course, the players. Amir Coffey (son of Gopher hardcourt great Richard Coffey) is a freshman and may already be the best player on the team. He dropped 30 on St. John's and led the team in scoring with 19 versus Arkansas. Meanwhile, Reggie Lynch is holding his own on the down low; he registered 11 rebounds and nine blocks Friday, then had 10 points and 7 rebounds Tuesday. And they passed much more competently than they probably did last year. Look, I know it's very early, and many prognosticators don't think these guys will reach the NCAA Tournament (if they don't, Head Coach Richard Pitino is in big trouble). But from what I saw in these two games, these players have talent, honest-to-goodness talent.
This week: Southern Illinois at Williams tonight (Friday night), then they play Florida St. (just like the women b-ballers, except this team plays in Tallahassee) for the male version of the ACC/Big Ten Challenge on Monday.
#-1: Gopher football (Last Week: -5). I don't have too many things to say about this team, I'm afraid. They vanquished Northwestern in the home finale, 29-12, to get to 8-3 overall. They have no shot of reaching the B1G title game, even though they can spoil Wisconsin's chances of doing so if they spring the upset in Madison Saturday afternoon (in which case Nebraska wins the B1G West if they beat Iowa today/Friday). As for these Goofs, I've seen projections putting them in either the Foster Farms Bowl, being played in (I'm guessing) San Diego or the Pinstripe Bowl in Yankee Stadium. Again, they seem to be at a level where they can beat incompetent teams and can't beat superior teams. And that, my friends, is that.
#-2: Gopher wrestling (Re-Entry!). In the first match in the program's Post-J Robinson Era, they barely -- barely -- defeat South Dakota St. of all teams, 18-17. If this is how things are going to be from now on, maybe we should just shutter this program.
In case you don't know, Robinson was suspended and then eventually fired around Labor Day -- ostensibly for covering up his players buying and selling prescription drugs, but really for a long and strange stretch of making up his own rules in his semi-autonomous fiefdom. The U. only looked the other way because Robinson was so successful, winning back-to-back NCAA titles just after the turn of the millennium. But he felt he was too above the law, and when a scandal happened that finally could have held the athletic program and the university liable, Athletic Director Mark Coyle finally had the broom to finally sweep out the eccentric Robinson.
However, in his place, on an interim basis, is Brandon Eggum. Eggum grappled under Robinson. Is a disciple of The Greatest Head Coach In Gopher Wrestling History going to clean up the program, or does he only know what his mentor told him? And, of course, how is he as a coach and a recruiter? If this first dual is any indication -- they had to win four consecutive matches to beat the Jackrabbits -- it's not much.
So, if you want to look at this negatively, you have a coach who has no track record but, theoretically, a belief he can cut corners in his program the same way his predecessor did. That is definitely not a winning combination. And therefore they should lose in their next match, against Oklahoma St. at the Sports Pavilion Sunday afternoon.
#-3: Gopher women's basketball (Last Week: -2). Well, here comes the correction. They outlasted Georgetown and routed Seton Hall at The Barn over the weekend. But in their second game away from home -- albeit in the Bahamas -- they lost in the Junkanoo Jam tournament opener Thanksgiving afternoon to Georgia, 70-58.
I have nothing else to add to this team. They play North Carolina in the loser's game tonight (Friday night), then host Florida St. in their portion of the ACC/B1G Challenge Wednesday.
#-4: Gopher men's hockey (Re-Entry!). Split a home-and-home with MSU-Mankato: Nipped the Mavericks at Mariucci 1-0 after getting drubbed by them in Mankato the night before, 4-1. One of the most irksome points haters of Don Lucia make is that the flagship school in The State Of Hockey regularly loses to the four other top-flight programs in Minnesota. When you're the biggest and most prestigious school, you should get the pick of the litter, and therefore you should be the most successful. That hasn't been the case lately; you can argue that Minnesota-Duluth has had more success in recent years, and the Mavericks have ruled the WCHA roost for a while now.
Moreover, you can gauge in-state strength with the North Star College Cup played at the X every January. It's a four-team tournament, but because the U. is, well, the U., they are guaranteed to play in it every year. Well, they won it the first year, in 2014, but have finished dead last the last two. Yes, it's just one tournament. But whether it be Gopher talent itching to make money in the NHL, Lucia's shortcomings as a recruiter and a developer of talent, or "chemistry," the smaller teams in the state have routinely stood toe-to-toe with the U., and it's pissing off the blue bloods here in the city.
This weekend they're in the Boston area. Tonight (Friday night) they play Northeastern, then they play another blue-blood program, Boston College, Sunday afternoon.
#-5: Wild (Last Week: -3). Apparently I am reading that the Mild are suffering from a paucity of goals as of late. Seems uncharacteristic of Bruce Beaudreau's MO, or at least his reputation. That may have been alleviated slightly this screening week, where they faced three teams that were stolen from their original cities: They lost at home Saturday to The Bastard Quebec Nordiques, lost in Overtime at The Bastard North Stars Monday, but outscored The Bastard Atlanta Thrashers Wednesday. The lost to Colorado really hurts because they were up 2-0 and then allowed three Avalanche goals. But I can't put them any lower because the two squads below the Mild are in much more dire positions, so in that sense, this team still has hope.
A hard back-to-back to start the week: Home Black Friday afternoon against the defending Stanley Cup Champion Pittsburgh Penguins followed by a visit to St. Louis the next night. They then start a trip to the Northwest Tuesday in Vancouver.
#-6: Vikings (Last Week: -6). From 1990 to 2014, only four-of-43 teams that began their season 5-0 failed to reach the playoffs. The ViQueens are on their way to being another.
Even though they finally broke their losing streak at four by beating (more like outlasting) The Bastard Cardinals Sunday, they fell back into the shit with an infuriating blueballs of a loss in Detroit Thanksgiving afternoon. They now sit at 6-5 with a looming humiliation at home at the hands of red-hot Dallas. And even though they now are a game behind the Lions, they essentially are two games behind them because they swept the Vikes.
Injuries have become an even greater factor this season; not only is the offensive line in shreds (I saw something on ESPN that $30 million of salary on the o-line is sidelined), Marcus Sherels did not play yesterday. Still, all three phases on the club continue to malfunction. The defense yielded a drive of 75 yards that led to Detroit's first score of the game (a Touchdown) and a 68-yard drive that ended with a Field Goal and a tie game.
But this game turned on one play, and therefore the blame needs to be pinned on Sam Bradford. There's already been talk that he's reverted to his safe space of throwing only small and immediate passes. That inability (or refusal) to throw deep allows opposing defenses to crowd the line of scrimmage. And that kind of set up the Interception Bradford threw in Vikes' territory. Lion Darius Slay was right in front of Adam Thielen, and somehow Bradford didn't see him. Matt Prater kicks the game-ending FG at the gun, and they might have well shot the Vikings' playoff chances dead.
I shouldn't slag on Bradford a whole lot; after all, he's still upright, which is something you couldn't say about him much in the past. But as his shortcomings continue and his team's losses pile up, the trade for him is becoming a more obvious mistake. And since they traded their first-round pick in the upcoming draft for him, that mistake could be an extremely serious one.
#-7: Timberwolves (Last Week: -4). OK, this shit isn't supposed to happen. I don't really care (at least this week) that these guys are young and you need to give them time. As good as Memphis, Boston and New Orleans are, you can beat one of those three teams. (Their best shot was the home one vs. the Celtics, but they lost that Monday, 99-93.) Their after-half woes continue; they were doubled up, 36-18, to The Bastard Charlotte Hornets in Wednesday's third, and as of November 16, they have a net rating (whatever the fuck that is) of -37 in the third stanza.
A lot of factors go into this puzzling anomaly (they have positive net ratings the other three quarters). Andrew Wiggins has lost his shot. Ricky Rubio has lost his game. Their offense is great overall, but the biggest factor is that their defense overall sucks, which is surprising given that Head Coach Tom Thibodeau made his bones on D. What this team needs is a veteran presence, someone to inject some professionalism and urgency into the first of many long seasons. I've heard some rumblings that Thibs is going to trade a young'un (Shabazz Muhammad is a name I've heard, but that's just speculation) for a veteran. Well, you had a veteran that could show these young pups the Association ropes. His name is Kevin Garnett, and it appears as though Thibodeau decided he wanted KG's space for another youngster. Rumor has it Garnett, even though his body is so racked by injury he probably wouldn't play more than a dozen minutes a game to fulfill the second of his two-year contract with the organization anyway, was so pissed off that he was pushed aside that he wouldn't mind signing up mid-season with another team just so he could get back at the Woofie Dogs. Well, if he did, it would serve this club right.
This screening week: At Phoenix and at Golden State back-to-back starting tonight (Friday night), then Utah Monday, then the beginning of a home-and-home with the New York Knicks Wednesday at Target.
And they've won the first three. My God, they did it. It wasn't easy, however. Over the weekend they went up by two sets to both Michigan St. and Michigan, but were pushed to the full five sets before winning. The stress of putting away the Spartans and Wolverines seemed to have caught up with them Dranksgiving Night, when #1 Nebraska took the first two sets. I was at the game, and when the U. was up in Set 2 21-17 but then allowed an 8-1 run to the Cornhuskers to go up two-sets-to-none, I tweeted, "Game over."
I was checking my phone for Set 3. I didn't realize that Nebraska had the Gophers 23-20 and poised for the sweep. But, somehow (I don't remember, I still was preoccupied with my smart), they took the Huskers to extra points and pulled out the set, 28-26. That's when the team and the match got my attention back. The U. stormed out to a big lead in Set 4, and while Nebraska battled back, they took the set at 17. So it was a hell of a match where both teams seemed to have been spent coming back from huge deficits. And yet, somehow, Minnesota took Set 5, 17-15, when a Cornhusker was dubiously called for double-contact. The epic comeback was complete. The U. broke Nebraska's winning streak at 14. And they are still in the running not only for a piece of a second straight conference title but also the #1 overall seed in the NCAA Tournament.
Still, they have one final contest: Senior Night Saturday night against third-ranked Wisconsin. There's a very real possibility that the U. has run out of gas to finish the season. In fact, all this gauntlet-throwing and character-revealing makes me scared that the team is running on fumes and has nothing for the tournament. Well, we'll see when we get there. In the meantime, I have to enjoy what may be the most incredible volleyball match I've ever seen, stopped paying attention to, and then paid attention to again.
#0: Gopher men's basketball (Last Week: -1). Last year's squad is an extremely low bar; after all, they racked up the worst record in program history. So it wouldn't take much to improve on that team.
I saw this club in back-to-back games this week, and so far, so good. Friday's Gavitt Tipoff Game vs. St. John's was the dicey one. They were trailing big throughout much of the first half, roared to a double-digit lead till about midway through the second half, and had to survive a hot-shooting Red Storm team to win, 92-86. On Tuesday against Arkansas, they were trailing until Razorback Head Coach Mike Anderson decided to implement his "Forty Minutes Of Hell" gameplan and started speeding up the contest. Somehow, that's when the Gophers started playing their best. They destroyed Arkansas, 85-71, and it really wasn't that close.
The big difference between this year and last is, of course, the players. Amir Coffey (son of Gopher hardcourt great Richard Coffey) is a freshman and may already be the best player on the team. He dropped 30 on St. John's and led the team in scoring with 19 versus Arkansas. Meanwhile, Reggie Lynch is holding his own on the down low; he registered 11 rebounds and nine blocks Friday, then had 10 points and 7 rebounds Tuesday. And they passed much more competently than they probably did last year. Look, I know it's very early, and many prognosticators don't think these guys will reach the NCAA Tournament (if they don't, Head Coach Richard Pitino is in big trouble). But from what I saw in these two games, these players have talent, honest-to-goodness talent.
This week: Southern Illinois at Williams tonight (Friday night), then they play Florida St. (just like the women b-ballers, except this team plays in Tallahassee) for the male version of the ACC/Big Ten Challenge on Monday.
#-1: Gopher football (Last Week: -5). I don't have too many things to say about this team, I'm afraid. They vanquished Northwestern in the home finale, 29-12, to get to 8-3 overall. They have no shot of reaching the B1G title game, even though they can spoil Wisconsin's chances of doing so if they spring the upset in Madison Saturday afternoon (in which case Nebraska wins the B1G West if they beat Iowa today/Friday). As for these Goofs, I've seen projections putting them in either the Foster Farms Bowl, being played in (I'm guessing) San Diego or the Pinstripe Bowl in Yankee Stadium. Again, they seem to be at a level where they can beat incompetent teams and can't beat superior teams. And that, my friends, is that.
#-2: Gopher wrestling (Re-Entry!). In the first match in the program's Post-J Robinson Era, they barely -- barely -- defeat South Dakota St. of all teams, 18-17. If this is how things are going to be from now on, maybe we should just shutter this program.
In case you don't know, Robinson was suspended and then eventually fired around Labor Day -- ostensibly for covering up his players buying and selling prescription drugs, but really for a long and strange stretch of making up his own rules in his semi-autonomous fiefdom. The U. only looked the other way because Robinson was so successful, winning back-to-back NCAA titles just after the turn of the millennium. But he felt he was too above the law, and when a scandal happened that finally could have held the athletic program and the university liable, Athletic Director Mark Coyle finally had the broom to finally sweep out the eccentric Robinson.
However, in his place, on an interim basis, is Brandon Eggum. Eggum grappled under Robinson. Is a disciple of The Greatest Head Coach In Gopher Wrestling History going to clean up the program, or does he only know what his mentor told him? And, of course, how is he as a coach and a recruiter? If this first dual is any indication -- they had to win four consecutive matches to beat the Jackrabbits -- it's not much.
So, if you want to look at this negatively, you have a coach who has no track record but, theoretically, a belief he can cut corners in his program the same way his predecessor did. That is definitely not a winning combination. And therefore they should lose in their next match, against Oklahoma St. at the Sports Pavilion Sunday afternoon.
#-3: Gopher women's basketball (Last Week: -2). Well, here comes the correction. They outlasted Georgetown and routed Seton Hall at The Barn over the weekend. But in their second game away from home -- albeit in the Bahamas -- they lost in the Junkanoo Jam tournament opener Thanksgiving afternoon to Georgia, 70-58.
I have nothing else to add to this team. They play North Carolina in the loser's game tonight (Friday night), then host Florida St. in their portion of the ACC/B1G Challenge Wednesday.
#-4: Gopher men's hockey (Re-Entry!). Split a home-and-home with MSU-Mankato: Nipped the Mavericks at Mariucci 1-0 after getting drubbed by them in Mankato the night before, 4-1. One of the most irksome points haters of Don Lucia make is that the flagship school in The State Of Hockey regularly loses to the four other top-flight programs in Minnesota. When you're the biggest and most prestigious school, you should get the pick of the litter, and therefore you should be the most successful. That hasn't been the case lately; you can argue that Minnesota-Duluth has had more success in recent years, and the Mavericks have ruled the WCHA roost for a while now.
Moreover, you can gauge in-state strength with the North Star College Cup played at the X every January. It's a four-team tournament, but because the U. is, well, the U., they are guaranteed to play in it every year. Well, they won it the first year, in 2014, but have finished dead last the last two. Yes, it's just one tournament. But whether it be Gopher talent itching to make money in the NHL, Lucia's shortcomings as a recruiter and a developer of talent, or "chemistry," the smaller teams in the state have routinely stood toe-to-toe with the U., and it's pissing off the blue bloods here in the city.
This weekend they're in the Boston area. Tonight (Friday night) they play Northeastern, then they play another blue-blood program, Boston College, Sunday afternoon.
#-5: Wild (Last Week: -3). Apparently I am reading that the Mild are suffering from a paucity of goals as of late. Seems uncharacteristic of Bruce Beaudreau's MO, or at least his reputation. That may have been alleviated slightly this screening week, where they faced three teams that were stolen from their original cities: They lost at home Saturday to The Bastard Quebec Nordiques, lost in Overtime at The Bastard North Stars Monday, but outscored The Bastard Atlanta Thrashers Wednesday. The lost to Colorado really hurts because they were up 2-0 and then allowed three Avalanche goals. But I can't put them any lower because the two squads below the Mild are in much more dire positions, so in that sense, this team still has hope.
A hard back-to-back to start the week: Home Black Friday afternoon against the defending Stanley Cup Champion Pittsburgh Penguins followed by a visit to St. Louis the next night. They then start a trip to the Northwest Tuesday in Vancouver.
#-6: Vikings (Last Week: -6). From 1990 to 2014, only four-of-43 teams that began their season 5-0 failed to reach the playoffs. The ViQueens are on their way to being another.
Even though they finally broke their losing streak at four by beating (more like outlasting) The Bastard Cardinals Sunday, they fell back into the shit with an infuriating blueballs of a loss in Detroit Thanksgiving afternoon. They now sit at 6-5 with a looming humiliation at home at the hands of red-hot Dallas. And even though they now are a game behind the Lions, they essentially are two games behind them because they swept the Vikes.
Injuries have become an even greater factor this season; not only is the offensive line in shreds (I saw something on ESPN that $30 million of salary on the o-line is sidelined), Marcus Sherels did not play yesterday. Still, all three phases on the club continue to malfunction. The defense yielded a drive of 75 yards that led to Detroit's first score of the game (a Touchdown) and a 68-yard drive that ended with a Field Goal and a tie game.
But this game turned on one play, and therefore the blame needs to be pinned on Sam Bradford. There's already been talk that he's reverted to his safe space of throwing only small and immediate passes. That inability (or refusal) to throw deep allows opposing defenses to crowd the line of scrimmage. And that kind of set up the Interception Bradford threw in Vikes' territory. Lion Darius Slay was right in front of Adam Thielen, and somehow Bradford didn't see him. Matt Prater kicks the game-ending FG at the gun, and they might have well shot the Vikings' playoff chances dead.
I shouldn't slag on Bradford a whole lot; after all, he's still upright, which is something you couldn't say about him much in the past. But as his shortcomings continue and his team's losses pile up, the trade for him is becoming a more obvious mistake. And since they traded their first-round pick in the upcoming draft for him, that mistake could be an extremely serious one.
#-7: Timberwolves (Last Week: -4). OK, this shit isn't supposed to happen. I don't really care (at least this week) that these guys are young and you need to give them time. As good as Memphis, Boston and New Orleans are, you can beat one of those three teams. (Their best shot was the home one vs. the Celtics, but they lost that Monday, 99-93.) Their after-half woes continue; they were doubled up, 36-18, to The Bastard Charlotte Hornets in Wednesday's third, and as of November 16, they have a net rating (whatever the fuck that is) of -37 in the third stanza.
A lot of factors go into this puzzling anomaly (they have positive net ratings the other three quarters). Andrew Wiggins has lost his shot. Ricky Rubio has lost his game. Their offense is great overall, but the biggest factor is that their defense overall sucks, which is surprising given that Head Coach Tom Thibodeau made his bones on D. What this team needs is a veteran presence, someone to inject some professionalism and urgency into the first of many long seasons. I've heard some rumblings that Thibs is going to trade a young'un (Shabazz Muhammad is a name I've heard, but that's just speculation) for a veteran. Well, you had a veteran that could show these young pups the Association ropes. His name is Kevin Garnett, and it appears as though Thibodeau decided he wanted KG's space for another youngster. Rumor has it Garnett, even though his body is so racked by injury he probably wouldn't play more than a dozen minutes a game to fulfill the second of his two-year contract with the organization anyway, was so pissed off that he was pushed aside that he wouldn't mind signing up mid-season with another team just so he could get back at the Woofie Dogs. Well, if he did, it would serve this club right.
This screening week: At Phoenix and at Golden State back-to-back starting tonight (Friday night), then Utah Monday, then the beginning of a home-and-home with the New York Knicks Wednesday at Target.
Thursday, November 24, 2016
Yeah, I'll Hang My Hat On Anything
I'm still in shock over Election Day. So while I've been preparing myself to become much more of a Facebook activist (because as pissed as I am, I sure as shit ain't no protester), when something like this comes up, I'll jump on this like the desperate whore that I am.
You may know that Hillary Clinton has won the popular vote, the raw number of votes in this country. At last check the gap between her and Donald Trump is two million votes. Then, in at least what I can tell, there has been chatter on Twitter (I, for one, found it here) that a few counties in Wisconsin overcounted Trump votes. In fact, those counties announced vote totals greater than the actual number of votes made. (How this was found, I don't know.)
Then, it was reported that some data scientists brought their findings of discrepancies in the state of Wisconsin to the Clinton campaign. If anyone would want a recount, it would come from them, obviously. They apparently decided against it. However, a professor and the nation's foremost cybervoting expert at the University of Michigan named J. Alex Halderman said that there should be an audit, if not a recount, for not just Wisconsin but also Michigan and Pennsylvania, states expected and polled for Clinton which Trump has either won or, in Michigan's case, is winning as of press time. I don't know if Halderman was one of the experts to talk to the Clinton campaign. He doesn't have evidence that there has been a hack or any other voter hacking. In fact, I don't think that he believes that Clinton actually won those states. But considering that many people believed before the election that Clinton would win, that the margins in the three states he's calling for recounts are so close, that he knows that voting machines can totally be hacked (by, say, Russia) and, most important of all, that he says that for democracy's sake we should be double-checking the votes manually anyway, we should have an audit and recount. (Halderman stated his own case just fine, but for writing's sake, this article on techdirt is a more compelling argument/summary of Halderman's points.)
(Should add that Nate Silver of FiveThirtyEight and Nate Cohn of the New York Times use statistical regression to prove that there wasn't a hack and that certain racial and education groups expected to vote for Clinton simply didn't. But they both were wrong in thinking that Clinton would win, so why should we believe them now? So fuck them.)
Recounts, however, are expensive -- or at least states make them expensive. In Pennsylvania, it costs you half a million; in Michigan it's $600,000; and in newly-corrupt Wisconsin, it's $1.1 million. Moreover, deadlines to file for recounts are coming up really soon. In Michigan it's the 30th; in Pennsylvania's it's the 28th; and in Wisconsin it's the 25th, aka tomorrow.
I felt the need to just toss in a couple shekels for the effort, however quixotic it seemed. But I didn't know where to donate, especially since Hillary Clinton seemingly refuses to ask for one ... to unite the country. And I didn't want to just toss my money to a grassroots campaign because I doubted it would get anyway. Well, someone who launched her own quixotic campaign for President, Dr. Jill Stein of the Green Party, launched a fundraising campaign yesterday. As of yesterday afternoon she raised about a quarter million of the $2.5 million needed to ask for the three recounts.
But then, while at the Golden Gopher volleyball match last night (which, by the way, they won over #1-ranked Nebraska after losing the first two sets, the second of which ended on an 8-1 Cornhusker run), I checked my Twitter feed. Stein raised it. All of it. And checking now, her donation page has just surpassed $3.2 million. They now have a stretch goal of $4.5 million. Furthermore, even though they cannot guarantee that they'll get the recounts the money asks for, if there is litigation in these three states, the total should reach $7 million.
So what the hell -- why don't I contribute something? Shit, if you believe Clinton was robbed, why don't you? I still have fantasies that Halderman and an army of computer scientists and data scientists and grad students comb through everything and find such significant hacking and election fraud that Clinton is determined to have actually won those three states -- which would be enough to give Clinton the 270 electoral votes needed to claim the presidency. A guy can dream, can't he?
Look, there is some next-level science and analysis going on here. I also know that this election season has been unlike anything we've ever seen before. We need to know what the hell actually happened. What I think we should stop doing is rely on probabilities. This campaign has reduced such probabilities to assumptions without evidence. This campaign has also exposed blind spots that we all have. So instead of sticking to what worked in the past, or even to overcompensating and potentially relying on new biases, let's just fucking count the votes and make sure no one hacked into these voting machines, OK? Is that too goddamn much to ask?
You may know that Hillary Clinton has won the popular vote, the raw number of votes in this country. At last check the gap between her and Donald Trump is two million votes. Then, in at least what I can tell, there has been chatter on Twitter (I, for one, found it here) that a few counties in Wisconsin overcounted Trump votes. In fact, those counties announced vote totals greater than the actual number of votes made. (How this was found, I don't know.)
Then, it was reported that some data scientists brought their findings of discrepancies in the state of Wisconsin to the Clinton campaign. If anyone would want a recount, it would come from them, obviously. They apparently decided against it. However, a professor and the nation's foremost cybervoting expert at the University of Michigan named J. Alex Halderman said that there should be an audit, if not a recount, for not just Wisconsin but also Michigan and Pennsylvania, states expected and polled for Clinton which Trump has either won or, in Michigan's case, is winning as of press time. I don't know if Halderman was one of the experts to talk to the Clinton campaign. He doesn't have evidence that there has been a hack or any other voter hacking. In fact, I don't think that he believes that Clinton actually won those states. But considering that many people believed before the election that Clinton would win, that the margins in the three states he's calling for recounts are so close, that he knows that voting machines can totally be hacked (by, say, Russia) and, most important of all, that he says that for democracy's sake we should be double-checking the votes manually anyway, we should have an audit and recount. (Halderman stated his own case just fine, but for writing's sake, this article on techdirt is a more compelling argument/summary of Halderman's points.)
(Should add that Nate Silver of FiveThirtyEight and Nate Cohn of the New York Times use statistical regression to prove that there wasn't a hack and that certain racial and education groups expected to vote for Clinton simply didn't. But they both were wrong in thinking that Clinton would win, so why should we believe them now? So fuck them.)
Recounts, however, are expensive -- or at least states make them expensive. In Pennsylvania, it costs you half a million; in Michigan it's $600,000; and in newly-corrupt Wisconsin, it's $1.1 million. Moreover, deadlines to file for recounts are coming up really soon. In Michigan it's the 30th; in Pennsylvania's it's the 28th; and in Wisconsin it's the 25th, aka tomorrow.
I felt the need to just toss in a couple shekels for the effort, however quixotic it seemed. But I didn't know where to donate, especially since Hillary Clinton seemingly refuses to ask for one ... to unite the country. And I didn't want to just toss my money to a grassroots campaign because I doubted it would get anyway. Well, someone who launched her own quixotic campaign for President, Dr. Jill Stein of the Green Party, launched a fundraising campaign yesterday. As of yesterday afternoon she raised about a quarter million of the $2.5 million needed to ask for the three recounts.
But then, while at the Golden Gopher volleyball match last night (which, by the way, they won over #1-ranked Nebraska after losing the first two sets, the second of which ended on an 8-1 Cornhusker run), I checked my Twitter feed. Stein raised it. All of it. And checking now, her donation page has just surpassed $3.2 million. They now have a stretch goal of $4.5 million. Furthermore, even though they cannot guarantee that they'll get the recounts the money asks for, if there is litigation in these three states, the total should reach $7 million.
So what the hell -- why don't I contribute something? Shit, if you believe Clinton was robbed, why don't you? I still have fantasies that Halderman and an army of computer scientists and data scientists and grad students comb through everything and find such significant hacking and election fraud that Clinton is determined to have actually won those three states -- which would be enough to give Clinton the 270 electoral votes needed to claim the presidency. A guy can dream, can't he?
Look, there is some next-level science and analysis going on here. I also know that this election season has been unlike anything we've ever seen before. We need to know what the hell actually happened. What I think we should stop doing is rely on probabilities. This campaign has reduced such probabilities to assumptions without evidence. This campaign has also exposed blind spots that we all have. So instead of sticking to what worked in the past, or even to overcompensating and potentially relying on new biases, let's just fucking count the votes and make sure no one hacked into these voting machines, OK? Is that too goddamn much to ask?
Wednesday, November 23, 2016
In Another Sign I Am One Step Closer To Dying ...
... I am not feeling too well after shoveling snow this morning. I was kind of surprised at how much snow fell, and even though there were at most a couple inches, and I think the temperature will be warm enough to melt most if not all of the snow today. But the city snowplow came through to clear the street, therefore a lot of the cruddy, chunky snow had rolled up onto the end of our driveway when I woke up, and I felt like I needed to shovel as much as I could before I had to go to work.
This, unfortunately, is the wet and heavy kind of snow -- stuff that melts if you let it, but if you don't, it's a pain to shovel. And since this was the first snow of the season, the heaviness and the fact this new shovel I was using slid over the snow surprised me. It was, to state the obvious, hard. So hard, in fact, that I think I only cleared, like, a foot's width of snow from the driveway before I had to leave.
During the middle of shoveling I felt my chest beat harder. That's happened before, many times, especially when shoveling heavy snow. Also, my left arm started to get all tingly and unsteady -- again, it's happened before. But it seems to have come a little sooner than it had when I shoveled in the past. It may be because shoveling was one of the first things I did in the morning -- no warm-up time whatsoever. Or, I may be feeling all these things because I'm getting old.
As I continue to type this my left shoulder continues to feel oogy, although that might be the result of the mocha I just drank. A co-worker suggested I drink water; I should do that too. But in the meantime, if I suddenly stop blogging every day here on Wailing And Failing, you'll know why.
Tuesday, November 22, 2016
I Can't Buy These Tickets Ever Again
So for the past two years, during the Minnesota State Fair, the University of Minnesota has an entire building. A part of it is dedicated to the athletic program, where they have promotional videos on a loop and show the championships and trophies the school has won. (A couple years ago was the year the football team won Floyd of Rosedale and the Little Brown Jug, and I may have been more geeked out to be able to take photos of those rivalry trophies than I should have.) They also have a ticket office where they advertise tickets that are, seemingly, dirt cheap for events for the sports teams playing in the fall and winter. Seeing as how they say these tickets won't be this cheap after the Fair, I decided to buy -- one men's basketball ticket (I think, I may have purchased a women's basketball ticket too) in 2015, then two men's b-ball and one men's hockey ticket this year.
Last year, the men's basketball game was on a Monday, and I remember that I had to drive through the first significant snowstorm of the season in order to get to Williams Arena and attend the game (which, by the way, was one of the few games the Gophers won -- they beat Clemson -- at home, and won period). This year, the first game was on Friday (vs. St. John's), and I had to drive through, you guessed it, the first significant snowstorm of the season in order to get to the game. I made up a cockamamie lie about needing to videochat on better wi-fi with someone looking at my Stanford application because something was wrong with it.
Tonight is the other game, against Arkansas. And goddammit, the second significant snowstorm of the year is falling tonight (and now, actually). I told my folks that I was too late getting to the coffeeshop on Friday and so I missed the videochat then, but the Stanford rep was going to try again tonight, just after work, and so I won't be coming home for dinner tonight. That should give me cover to watch the game -- assuming, of course, the traffic isn't so bad that I get into a bad accident or something.
I'm getting too unlucky with buying these tickets at the Fair. Maybe I should not buy them anymore. Or maybe there's a chance I'll have decent weather for the hockey game close to New Year's. Or, maybe then there'll be an actually blizzard, in which case I won't even approach the U. building come the Fair.
Monday, November 21, 2016
Human Resources Sending Out A Threat
OK, so I get a letter from the old test scoring place, the one where I had to leave because that girl was suddenly promoted. Since this is the holiday season -- OK, more like before the holiday season -- I figured that, even despite my heated but productive meeting with the person who hires every year, I had been evaluated as good enough, and that this was the tentative schedule or projects that I could sign up for for next year. And that was what I expected to do ... except for that one project that forced me to leave.
It was not that type of letter. Instead, I got a cold boilerplate letter stating that after the evaluations about me were read over, they told me that they discovered that I quit a project before the project was completed. I was told not to do it again, otherwise I might not be hired back.
On a visceral level I am totally upset by this. I have a heart-to-heart with my boss about this, and all of a sudden she and/or the company's HR department sends me this letter? This is a shot across the bow, as far as I'm concerned. But then I start to get confused. I have left projects early each of the past two years, I believe, and I have never been sent a letter warning me about skipping out on projects then. Is it different because the person I spoke with decided my "talk" with her had to be put on my permanent record, as a legal, cover-your-ass type of move? Or is it because this time the n00b who was given supervisory powers over me just because she got everything right on one simple stupid fucking test was just following the rules like a space cadet?
I'm getting really perturbed how one simple talk has led to a paper trail that could end my career with these guys. But then I remember that when I decided to write an anonymous evaluation about this girl and then demanded that I talk to someone over how I thought this project, and by extension this company, went sideways on its integrity, I vowed that I didn't care about any consequences I would reap as a result. I was going to have my say, and what comes would come. Well, I guess it came. And while this isn't great, it doesn't look as though I won't be hired by these guys ever again.
Therefore, I expect a list of projects for the next year from these guys, and soon. And if not. ...
It was not that type of letter. Instead, I got a cold boilerplate letter stating that after the evaluations about me were read over, they told me that they discovered that I quit a project before the project was completed. I was told not to do it again, otherwise I might not be hired back.
On a visceral level I am totally upset by this. I have a heart-to-heart with my boss about this, and all of a sudden she and/or the company's HR department sends me this letter? This is a shot across the bow, as far as I'm concerned. But then I start to get confused. I have left projects early each of the past two years, I believe, and I have never been sent a letter warning me about skipping out on projects then. Is it different because the person I spoke with decided my "talk" with her had to be put on my permanent record, as a legal, cover-your-ass type of move? Or is it because this time the n00b who was given supervisory powers over me just because she got everything right on one simple stupid fucking test was just following the rules like a space cadet?
I'm getting really perturbed how one simple talk has led to a paper trail that could end my career with these guys. But then I remember that when I decided to write an anonymous evaluation about this girl and then demanded that I talk to someone over how I thought this project, and by extension this company, went sideways on its integrity, I vowed that I didn't care about any consequences I would reap as a result. I was going to have my say, and what comes would come. Well, I guess it came. And while this isn't great, it doesn't look as though I won't be hired by these guys ever again.
Therefore, I expect a list of projects for the next year from these guys, and soon. And if not. ...
Sunday, November 20, 2016
Alright, So There Was Nothing To Worry About
Turns out that even though I was ten minutes late, because there was a last-minute cancellation I had to fill in for some guy up in the broadcast booth. And besides carrying a man's two bags, one of them really heavy (I can still feel my left arm twitch), I had nothing that I had to do. I didn't have to meet anyone that I had to overly impress. Which is kind of a bad thing, because I've worked with this crew a few times and they're really good people. I ran into one of them while coming in and the dude gave me this great bear hug. Man, these are the people that make working these games worthwhile!
So, my stressful weekend is over. Now, back to work. But first, getting gas for my car. But first-first, going to the stripclub!
So, my stressful weekend is over. Now, back to work. But first, getting gas for my car. But first-first, going to the stripclub!
Saturday, November 19, 2016
The first real taste of winter and this weekend I'm nervous. After blogging this I don't know if I should eat lunch, exercise or go home and see my asshole brother, my sister-in-law and my niece. I don't know if they're staying long or if they're going to have dinner with us, because I need to boogie out of the house to watch the football game tonight.
And then I have to work the Vikings game tomorrow. When I was told I just had to come in at 10 and fetch things in case someone needed something, I thought it was one of those times where I could actually relax at a game. But then I saw who I'd be working for and I figured there would be a mistake; these guys usually want me to do everything, and I'm not sure that won't be the case tomorrow. There's some miscommunication going on, and I don't know if I'll get blindsided by something then.
That's it.
And then I have to work the Vikings game tomorrow. When I was told I just had to come in at 10 and fetch things in case someone needed something, I thought it was one of those times where I could actually relax at a game. But then I saw who I'd be working for and I figured there would be a mistake; these guys usually want me to do everything, and I'm not sure that won't be the case tomorrow. There's some miscommunication going on, and I don't know if I'll get blindsided by something then.
That's it.
The Enemies Are All Around Us, And They Have Won, But They're Still The Right-Minded People's Enemies
I unearthed this blog post from early February, just as the Republican primary was kicking off. (I was looking to see if I have named a blog post in the past something to the effect of, "The Enemies Among Us," and that post was close enough, so I titled this blog post something different, and longer.) I was making fun of these people, living in America's hinterlands, overwhelmingly white, and most using dumb and racist logic when siding for their candidate in the primary.
Well, enough of them lined up behind Donald Trump, especially in Florida, North Carolina, and the Rust Belt states of Pennsylvania, Ohio, Michigan and Wisconsin, to give him the win and glided path to loot the nation for his own personal fortune. Well, that and 25 years of unbridled smearing of Hillary Clinton's reputation, sexism, voter suppression efforts and the vagaries of the Electoral College (which, if I haven't said before, I'm not as gung ho to jettison as others).
I'm still trying to digest this loss, and to understand how Clinton could have been defeated, especially when the vast majority of polls had her winning. There are still leads to be chased down, especially the ones concerning James Comey, Russian meddling and the enabling by WikiLeaks. But possibly the real and main reason is, wait for it, racism.
I've been going back and forth with how much race, and stoking racial animosity, was a factor in Trump and the Republicans sweeping into power. I've had many people, some friends of mine, not only dispute but push back hard by my visceral feeling that most Trump voters are bigots. My counterargument was that, even though people might be able to prove that some Trump voters are not racist and did not vote out of racism, the fact that Trump said all this bigoted bullshit and they still voted for him makes their vote for him morally objectionable at best and, at worst, racists.
I am still vacillating in painting all these Trump voters with a broad brush. I mean, if I am fighting back at the notion that all Muslims should be considered terrorists and all Mexicans should be deported, do I have the right to regard Trump voters as a monolith like Republicans think Muslims and Mexicans are? (I could argue that the difference is that you have a nationality and a religion on one side and a mere aggregate of people who committed to the same person on the other, and therefore that's a very false equivalence -- you know, that argument holds a lot of water.) But then I see Charlie Pierce arguing that The Media has spent a lot of time reporting what Rural Americans felt about Campaign 2016, contrary to the notion that The Media and Democrats didn't listen to "Forgotten America." And here and here and here, I gather the strong inference that Pierce believes the real reason Trump won was because ... well, white people are racist. I may be drinking his Kool-Aid, but if he says so. ...
Look, this is such a global cavalcade of disaster that I could go down any number of rabbit holes in trying to figure out why this shit happened and think until I go mad. My bottom line holds, however. This grossly unqualified -- and gross -- thief is going to be The Leader Of The Free World, and he's racist and he used racist imagery (amongst other gross things) in order to win. People knew what he was saying, and they voted for him anyway. If they didn't agree with his racism, they weren't offended by it enough to vote against him, which is a dealbreaker with me and with many other right-minded folks.
And that's why I am kind of upset with people protesting and railing against Trump. That, of course, is necessary. But logic demands that if you are against Trump, you have to be against the people who voted for Trump. That's why I keep believing that we get the government we deserve. My fellow countrymen had the free will to vote for whoever they wanted as President, and they picked that fucking asshole. You not only have to go after the boss at the end of the level, but also every single goddamn enemy helping that boss throughout the level. This might mean fighting in the streets, but this country is already pretty divided. I don't think I'm paranoid; our enemies surround us. Well, not here in the Twin Cities, but you know what I mean.
Well, enough of them lined up behind Donald Trump, especially in Florida, North Carolina, and the Rust Belt states of Pennsylvania, Ohio, Michigan and Wisconsin, to give him the win and glided path to loot the nation for his own personal fortune. Well, that and 25 years of unbridled smearing of Hillary Clinton's reputation, sexism, voter suppression efforts and the vagaries of the Electoral College (which, if I haven't said before, I'm not as gung ho to jettison as others).
I'm still trying to digest this loss, and to understand how Clinton could have been defeated, especially when the vast majority of polls had her winning. There are still leads to be chased down, especially the ones concerning James Comey, Russian meddling and the enabling by WikiLeaks. But possibly the real and main reason is, wait for it, racism.
I've been going back and forth with how much race, and stoking racial animosity, was a factor in Trump and the Republicans sweeping into power. I've had many people, some friends of mine, not only dispute but push back hard by my visceral feeling that most Trump voters are bigots. My counterargument was that, even though people might be able to prove that some Trump voters are not racist and did not vote out of racism, the fact that Trump said all this bigoted bullshit and they still voted for him makes their vote for him morally objectionable at best and, at worst, racists.
I am still vacillating in painting all these Trump voters with a broad brush. I mean, if I am fighting back at the notion that all Muslims should be considered terrorists and all Mexicans should be deported, do I have the right to regard Trump voters as a monolith like Republicans think Muslims and Mexicans are? (I could argue that the difference is that you have a nationality and a religion on one side and a mere aggregate of people who committed to the same person on the other, and therefore that's a very false equivalence -- you know, that argument holds a lot of water.) But then I see Charlie Pierce arguing that The Media has spent a lot of time reporting what Rural Americans felt about Campaign 2016, contrary to the notion that The Media and Democrats didn't listen to "Forgotten America." And here and here and here, I gather the strong inference that Pierce believes the real reason Trump won was because ... well, white people are racist. I may be drinking his Kool-Aid, but if he says so. ...
Look, this is such a global cavalcade of disaster that I could go down any number of rabbit holes in trying to figure out why this shit happened and think until I go mad. My bottom line holds, however. This grossly unqualified -- and gross -- thief is going to be The Leader Of The Free World, and he's racist and he used racist imagery (amongst other gross things) in order to win. People knew what he was saying, and they voted for him anyway. If they didn't agree with his racism, they weren't offended by it enough to vote against him, which is a dealbreaker with me and with many other right-minded folks.
And that's why I am kind of upset with people protesting and railing against Trump. That, of course, is necessary. But logic demands that if you are against Trump, you have to be against the people who voted for Trump. That's why I keep believing that we get the government we deserve. My fellow countrymen had the free will to vote for whoever they wanted as President, and they picked that fucking asshole. You not only have to go after the boss at the end of the level, but also every single goddamn enemy helping that boss throughout the level. This might mean fighting in the streets, but this country is already pretty divided. I don't think I'm paranoid; our enemies surround us. Well, not here in the Twin Cities, but you know what I mean.
Friday, November 18, 2016
The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey
#0: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: -3). It wasn't so much the competition this screening week that convinced me to not only put the U. volleyballers atop the WMNSS but also put them above negative numbers. Illinois is below .500 in conference play, and Northwestern has won only one game in the B1G and eight overall. I am partly impressed that the Gophs beat both teams on the road -- which, BTW, concludes the road part of their schedule. Even more impressive: Minnesota has not only won their last six matches, but have swept all six matches.
But really I'm putting this club on top and with a #0 because their is a potential for a crackling, and possibly even attention-getting, match coming down the pike for Wednesday, aka Dranksgiving. The way the AVCA Top 25 stands now, the Gophers are ranked second in the nation behind Nebraska, which this week received all 64 first-place votes. And the U. hosts the Cornhuskers at 8 o'clock that evening. I plan on going. In fact, like last year's match against Penn St., I'm ready to pay a scalper a premium price for it.
Two things stand in the way, however, of a 1-vs.-2 matchup at a time slot where there is relatively little competition for the sports fan's eyeballs. The Michigan teams come to the Sports Pavilion this weekend. And even though Michigan St. (who they play today/Friday) and Michigan (their opponent Sunday afternoon) are half a shade worse than Minnesota to these eyes, both squads are good enough to spring an upset in Dinkytown, especially if the Golden Gophers are caught looking ahead to Wednesday. But if this team focuses and powers through -- man, there should be some national media looking at this game. I mean it.
#-1: Gopher men's basketball (Re-Entry!). So far, so good in what probably is a make-or-break year for Richard Pitino as Head Coach. Their first game, a 12-point victory over Louisiana-Lafayette, was the closest of the three wins in their opening week; they also crushed Texas-Arlington and Mount St. Mary's, even though all three of those games were at home.
As bad as Pitino has been at X's and O's, he has (finally at least) recruited well. He has a ballyhooed freshman class, led by Amir Coffey (son of Gopher b-ball legend Richard Coffey, I believe) and Memphian Eric Curry. They'll need it, for Pitino's teams have been a melange of medicore bigs and wings. There hasn't been definitive roles for the players on the floor. Of course, getting really good players to come to Dinkytown might solve a lot of that.
While three wins in a week is mighty impressive, this upcoming week might be a better barometer of how good this team is and how good Pitino can really coach. Tonight, in a game I bought a ticket to at the State Fair, they play St. John's as part of the Gavitt Tipoff Games, the relatively new Big Ten-Big East series. It's the second conference-versus-conference arrangement they have now; the series where they play an opponent from the ACC comes later this month. On Tuesday, in another game I have already bought a ticket to, they play Arkansas. So that's a game vs. a BcS school and one against the Catholic-heavy, basketball-first league. That is a step up in class of opponent. However, both games are at home.
#-2: Gopher women's basketball (Re-Entry!). And what about the Gopher women's b-ball program? They have been able to bring in scores of really good players since their Final Four run -- Amanda Zahui B., Rachel Banham, Carlie Wagner -- but team-wise they have not even made a ripple since the Whalen/McCarville Era. They've been basically a mediocre program that, if you really scrutinize it, has had more postseason appearances than not. But that's not UConn, or Baylor, or Notre Dame. That's not even, oh, N.C. St.
So what now? Marlene Stollings' game plan (and by the way, remember that the Athletic Director who pucked Stollings out of Virginia Commonwealth is no longer there) is to center the offense around Wagner, who came in with a reputation as being a sharpshooter from deep. Banging on the down low like Zahui, or handling the ball and being able to create her own shot from everywhere like Banham, is not her game. So her teammates are just going to find a way to get her the ball when she's open? And what about her defense?
BcS teams have the luxury of starting their seasons easy. That hasn't totally been the case with this club; they started out beat Harvard at Williams and then outlasting VCU in Richmond, so a true road win this early is nice. (I just couldn't put them above their male counterparts; two home wins still beat one road win.) But let's see how they do this week. They host a pair of Catholic schools, Georgetown (this afternoon as part of a jam-packed weekend at the U.) and Seton Hall (Sunday afternoon), then Georgia in the opening round of the Junkanoo Jam in Bimini, the Bahamas.
#-3: Wild (Last Week: -4). So I dragged my tired butt to St. Paul to watch the Bruins game last (Thursday) night for free with my friend. Honestly, it looked like both teams were playing Game, oh, 10 of 82. Both teams, I swear, were pacing themselves now that they're going through the heart of a seven-month work assignment -- 75% intensity, with poor passing and pucks consistently clattering off of sticks.
Boston was the only team to put the puck in the net, twice, and they still got shut out. In the second period, David Backes (who went to my high school) somehow slipped the puck past Devan Dubnyk. But Bruce Boudreau challenged the score, and it turns out that Backes came across the blue line before the puck did. Offsides, no goal. Then, with only 44.5 seconds left to play, Mikael Granlund centered a puck that hit off Boston's Adam McQuaid and past Goaltender Tuukka Rask. I'm so glad I could hear "Let's Go Crazy," the Wild's new goal song, but I and everybody in the arena (including Wild players) that they had very little to do with the game-winning goal, even though it officially goes to Granlund.
That capped off a week where they played every other day. They lost to Philadelphia and beat Ottawa (in Overtime) on the road, then lost to Calgary and beat these Bruins at the X. They continue playing every other day this screening week: Home to Colorado, at The Team That Was Stolen From Us, then hosting both Winnipeg and Pittsburgh.
#-4: Timberwolves (Last Week: -5). The Woofie Dogs also played four games this week, and this squad also went 2-2. But since all four games were at Target Center, that means that they lost to the Clippers and Charlotte at home, and therefore they are ranked lower than the Mild. It's tough to see so much young talent still taking their lumps, but I've got to trust The Process, whatever that is. Nevertheless, this dunk by Karl-Anthony Towns is a taste of what's to come:
This week: At Memphis, home to Boston, at New Orleans.
#-5: Gopher football (Last Week: -1). With the Goofs' close 24-17 loss in Nebraska Saturday, now more than ever I know where this team stands in the B1G. So now, knowing that this team can regularly beat the shitty teams in the league but have little chance of beating programs that are even incrementally better than them, what now? Do we just accept that this is the best it can be? Or do we fire Tracy Claeys with aspirations that they -- we -- can become Ohio St. or Michigan?
Here's the funny thing. With the loss, SI.com has the Gophs now projected to play Stanford (which is falling like a stone, by the way) in the Holiday Bowl Dec. 27. Bowl games are mere exhibitions, but it's not a bad one to go to. The Holiday Bowl has been around a long time, and I don't know if the U. has ever played there. (My alma mater, however, played there last year.) But for the few weeks before, when they were rolling up their record against the pure dregs of the conference, they were projected to play in, of all places, the Outback Bowl. The Outback Bowl! That game is usually played on New Year's Day (although this year it'll be played on Jan. 2)! It's the one in Tampa! It used to be called (and should still be called) the Hall Of Fame Bowl! It's a hell of a bowl! And for, like, three weeks SI.com thought the U. was going to play there, then! Now, a couple years ago they played in the Citrus Bowl in Orlando on New Year's Day. But Jerry Kill actually piloted that team into a solid squad. Well, maybe not great; I think they lost to Missouri. So these bowl placements might be more of a result of conference leverage. Regardless, a team that was a deceptively good 7-2 got busted down from Tampa Bay to San Diego. And they could slide even further, to one of those new-ish bowls whose names are solely the name of the sponsor (instead of an actual bowl name with the sponsor's name shoved in front) if they don't beat an improving Northwestern squad at in the team's final home game of the season.
#-6: Vikings (Last Week: -Infinity). The ViQueens were playing in Washington Sunday afternoon, around the time I volunteered to drive 40 minutes to a bank to be an extra in my friend's film. I was bitching about spending gas to go out there, but I was checking up on the game through Twitter, and I'll tell ya, I think I made the right decision not to watch the game on TV. The early 14-0 hole, then catching up, then leading, then coughing up the lead again ... fuck that. I got released early to hear the end of the game in my car radio. The last gasp the Vikings had to avoid a 26-20 loss ended with back-to-back sacks, the first of which resulted in the Achilles tear (and the end of the season) of free-agent pickup Jake Long. T.J. Clemmings was flipped over to the left side, but on fourth down Washington just overloaded that side to overwhelm the already-underwhelming Clemmings and to bring down Bradford. Hey, you think it would have been smart to throw a Running Back in there for blitz pick-up?
After missing another Extra Point in Sunday's game, Blair Walsh was finally shitcanned in favor of friend Kai Forbarth. This kind of feels like Walsh was made a scapegoat, seeing as all facets of the team's game have collapsed. But if you continue to miss kicks, and Walsh missed four XPs, more than any other Kicker, what can you do? Even those kids in Blaine who made poster for him to cheer him up after he fucked up that Field Goal in the Tundra Bowl last postseason are probably all, "Sorry, Blair -- at this point, I can't help you."
The Vikes host The Bastard Chicago-By-Way-Of-St.-Louis Cardinals, another team that has disappointed. I'll be working that game. I wonder if the team's recent misadventures have depressed ticket prices for what is still a brand-new stadium.
#-Infinity: Gopher soccer (Last Week: 0). Well, it turns out that scheduling the side's first-round NCAA Tournament match at the same time as my alma mater's football game was a blessing disguise. The team I watched on TV sprung the upset; the team that was playing at Robbie Stadium laid an egg and was dismissed from the tourney via upset.
These Goofers, who were so dangerous on the attack, just failed to crack one past N.C. St. Goalkeeper Sydney Wootten. In fact, the Wolfpack wound up outshooting the U., 14-13, including having target practice on them in the first half, 10-2. Tarah Hobbs repelled every Wolfpack howitzer. However, she yielded all four of N.C. St.'s tries in Penalty Kicks after both teams failed to score in regulation and the two 10-minute periods of extra time. On the other side, Josee Stiever and Molly Fielder failed on their PK tries, and so Minnesota was shocked at home, 4-2 in the shootout. It did not help that one of their best players, Senior Simone Kolander, left early in the second half after a scramble in the box and did not return the rest of the game.
This is an extremely bitter pill to swallow. I still don't like penalties, the worst way a sport settles ties (with college football's "Let's not tax the young men -- just put the ball on the 25 and let's go!" tie-breaking procedure). But Saturday night was a case where the more-talented team just was unable to break through against, supposedly, an inferior opponent. From this report from local soccer blog FiftyFive.One it looked like the Wolfpack weren't playing much in form, either, so, I guess it was just "one of those things." Except that it shouldn't have been one of those things.
They finished with their best-ever record of 16-3-4 overall, yet they went one-and-done. So, in my mind, the program's team with the second-best record ever, the one that went 22-4 in 2008, still stands as the U.'s best ever because that team made it to the Sweet 16 (which, by the way, they played at home; I've told this story a million times already, but I was at the game, one in which it was so cold the Coke I bought froze. And visiting Georgetown won the match with ten seconds left to go in the second period of Added Extra Time. Simply heartbreaking). This team had their chance; they were supposed to lose in the Sweet 16 at Stanford. But they failed to do that, so they cannot be looked at too fondly, I'm afraid.
And who knows if they'll ascend to such heights again? This team loses Kolander, Hobbs, Stiever and Defender Rashida Beal to graduation. Who will take their places? Anyone?
But really I'm putting this club on top and with a #0 because their is a potential for a crackling, and possibly even attention-getting, match coming down the pike for Wednesday, aka Dranksgiving. The way the AVCA Top 25 stands now, the Gophers are ranked second in the nation behind Nebraska, which this week received all 64 first-place votes. And the U. hosts the Cornhuskers at 8 o'clock that evening. I plan on going. In fact, like last year's match against Penn St., I'm ready to pay a scalper a premium price for it.
Two things stand in the way, however, of a 1-vs.-2 matchup at a time slot where there is relatively little competition for the sports fan's eyeballs. The Michigan teams come to the Sports Pavilion this weekend. And even though Michigan St. (who they play today/Friday) and Michigan (their opponent Sunday afternoon) are half a shade worse than Minnesota to these eyes, both squads are good enough to spring an upset in Dinkytown, especially if the Golden Gophers are caught looking ahead to Wednesday. But if this team focuses and powers through -- man, there should be some national media looking at this game. I mean it.
#-1: Gopher men's basketball (Re-Entry!). So far, so good in what probably is a make-or-break year for Richard Pitino as Head Coach. Their first game, a 12-point victory over Louisiana-Lafayette, was the closest of the three wins in their opening week; they also crushed Texas-Arlington and Mount St. Mary's, even though all three of those games were at home.
As bad as Pitino has been at X's and O's, he has (finally at least) recruited well. He has a ballyhooed freshman class, led by Amir Coffey (son of Gopher b-ball legend Richard Coffey, I believe) and Memphian Eric Curry. They'll need it, for Pitino's teams have been a melange of medicore bigs and wings. There hasn't been definitive roles for the players on the floor. Of course, getting really good players to come to Dinkytown might solve a lot of that.
While three wins in a week is mighty impressive, this upcoming week might be a better barometer of how good this team is and how good Pitino can really coach. Tonight, in a game I bought a ticket to at the State Fair, they play St. John's as part of the Gavitt Tipoff Games, the relatively new Big Ten-Big East series. It's the second conference-versus-conference arrangement they have now; the series where they play an opponent from the ACC comes later this month. On Tuesday, in another game I have already bought a ticket to, they play Arkansas. So that's a game vs. a BcS school and one against the Catholic-heavy, basketball-first league. That is a step up in class of opponent. However, both games are at home.
#-2: Gopher women's basketball (Re-Entry!). And what about the Gopher women's b-ball program? They have been able to bring in scores of really good players since their Final Four run -- Amanda Zahui B., Rachel Banham, Carlie Wagner -- but team-wise they have not even made a ripple since the Whalen/McCarville Era. They've been basically a mediocre program that, if you really scrutinize it, has had more postseason appearances than not. But that's not UConn, or Baylor, or Notre Dame. That's not even, oh, N.C. St.
So what now? Marlene Stollings' game plan (and by the way, remember that the Athletic Director who pucked Stollings out of Virginia Commonwealth is no longer there) is to center the offense around Wagner, who came in with a reputation as being a sharpshooter from deep. Banging on the down low like Zahui, or handling the ball and being able to create her own shot from everywhere like Banham, is not her game. So her teammates are just going to find a way to get her the ball when she's open? And what about her defense?
BcS teams have the luxury of starting their seasons easy. That hasn't totally been the case with this club; they started out beat Harvard at Williams and then outlasting VCU in Richmond, so a true road win this early is nice. (I just couldn't put them above their male counterparts; two home wins still beat one road win.) But let's see how they do this week. They host a pair of Catholic schools, Georgetown (this afternoon as part of a jam-packed weekend at the U.) and Seton Hall (Sunday afternoon), then Georgia in the opening round of the Junkanoo Jam in Bimini, the Bahamas.
#-3: Wild (Last Week: -4). So I dragged my tired butt to St. Paul to watch the Bruins game last (Thursday) night for free with my friend. Honestly, it looked like both teams were playing Game, oh, 10 of 82. Both teams, I swear, were pacing themselves now that they're going through the heart of a seven-month work assignment -- 75% intensity, with poor passing and pucks consistently clattering off of sticks.
Boston was the only team to put the puck in the net, twice, and they still got shut out. In the second period, David Backes (who went to my high school) somehow slipped the puck past Devan Dubnyk. But Bruce Boudreau challenged the score, and it turns out that Backes came across the blue line before the puck did. Offsides, no goal. Then, with only 44.5 seconds left to play, Mikael Granlund centered a puck that hit off Boston's Adam McQuaid and past Goaltender Tuukka Rask. I'm so glad I could hear "Let's Go Crazy," the Wild's new goal song, but I and everybody in the arena (including Wild players) that they had very little to do with the game-winning goal, even though it officially goes to Granlund.
That capped off a week where they played every other day. They lost to Philadelphia and beat Ottawa (in Overtime) on the road, then lost to Calgary and beat these Bruins at the X. They continue playing every other day this screening week: Home to Colorado, at The Team That Was Stolen From Us, then hosting both Winnipeg and Pittsburgh.
#-4: Timberwolves (Last Week: -5). The Woofie Dogs also played four games this week, and this squad also went 2-2. But since all four games were at Target Center, that means that they lost to the Clippers and Charlotte at home, and therefore they are ranked lower than the Mild. It's tough to see so much young talent still taking their lumps, but I've got to trust The Process, whatever that is. Nevertheless, this dunk by Karl-Anthony Towns is a taste of what's to come:
This week: At Memphis, home to Boston, at New Orleans.
#-5: Gopher football (Last Week: -1). With the Goofs' close 24-17 loss in Nebraska Saturday, now more than ever I know where this team stands in the B1G. So now, knowing that this team can regularly beat the shitty teams in the league but have little chance of beating programs that are even incrementally better than them, what now? Do we just accept that this is the best it can be? Or do we fire Tracy Claeys with aspirations that they -- we -- can become Ohio St. or Michigan?
Here's the funny thing. With the loss, SI.com has the Gophs now projected to play Stanford (which is falling like a stone, by the way) in the Holiday Bowl Dec. 27. Bowl games are mere exhibitions, but it's not a bad one to go to. The Holiday Bowl has been around a long time, and I don't know if the U. has ever played there. (My alma mater, however, played there last year.) But for the few weeks before, when they were rolling up their record against the pure dregs of the conference, they were projected to play in, of all places, the Outback Bowl. The Outback Bowl! That game is usually played on New Year's Day (although this year it'll be played on Jan. 2)! It's the one in Tampa! It used to be called (and should still be called) the Hall Of Fame Bowl! It's a hell of a bowl! And for, like, three weeks SI.com thought the U. was going to play there, then! Now, a couple years ago they played in the Citrus Bowl in Orlando on New Year's Day. But Jerry Kill actually piloted that team into a solid squad. Well, maybe not great; I think they lost to Missouri. So these bowl placements might be more of a result of conference leverage. Regardless, a team that was a deceptively good 7-2 got busted down from Tampa Bay to San Diego. And they could slide even further, to one of those new-ish bowls whose names are solely the name of the sponsor (instead of an actual bowl name with the sponsor's name shoved in front) if they don't beat an improving Northwestern squad at in the team's final home game of the season.
#-6: Vikings (Last Week: -Infinity). The ViQueens were playing in Washington Sunday afternoon, around the time I volunteered to drive 40 minutes to a bank to be an extra in my friend's film. I was bitching about spending gas to go out there, but I was checking up on the game through Twitter, and I'll tell ya, I think I made the right decision not to watch the game on TV. The early 14-0 hole, then catching up, then leading, then coughing up the lead again ... fuck that. I got released early to hear the end of the game in my car radio. The last gasp the Vikings had to avoid a 26-20 loss ended with back-to-back sacks, the first of which resulted in the Achilles tear (and the end of the season) of free-agent pickup Jake Long. T.J. Clemmings was flipped over to the left side, but on fourth down Washington just overloaded that side to overwhelm the already-underwhelming Clemmings and to bring down Bradford. Hey, you think it would have been smart to throw a Running Back in there for blitz pick-up?
After missing another Extra Point in Sunday's game, Blair Walsh was finally shitcanned in favor of friend Kai Forbarth. This kind of feels like Walsh was made a scapegoat, seeing as all facets of the team's game have collapsed. But if you continue to miss kicks, and Walsh missed four XPs, more than any other Kicker, what can you do? Even those kids in Blaine who made poster for him to cheer him up after he fucked up that Field Goal in the Tundra Bowl last postseason are probably all, "Sorry, Blair -- at this point, I can't help you."
The Vikes host The Bastard Chicago-By-Way-Of-St.-Louis Cardinals, another team that has disappointed. I'll be working that game. I wonder if the team's recent misadventures have depressed ticket prices for what is still a brand-new stadium.
#-Infinity: Gopher soccer (Last Week: 0). Well, it turns out that scheduling the side's first-round NCAA Tournament match at the same time as my alma mater's football game was a blessing disguise. The team I watched on TV sprung the upset; the team that was playing at Robbie Stadium laid an egg and was dismissed from the tourney via upset.
These Goofers, who were so dangerous on the attack, just failed to crack one past N.C. St. Goalkeeper Sydney Wootten. In fact, the Wolfpack wound up outshooting the U., 14-13, including having target practice on them in the first half, 10-2. Tarah Hobbs repelled every Wolfpack howitzer. However, she yielded all four of N.C. St.'s tries in Penalty Kicks after both teams failed to score in regulation and the two 10-minute periods of extra time. On the other side, Josee Stiever and Molly Fielder failed on their PK tries, and so Minnesota was shocked at home, 4-2 in the shootout. It did not help that one of their best players, Senior Simone Kolander, left early in the second half after a scramble in the box and did not return the rest of the game.
This is an extremely bitter pill to swallow. I still don't like penalties, the worst way a sport settles ties (with college football's "Let's not tax the young men -- just put the ball on the 25 and let's go!" tie-breaking procedure). But Saturday night was a case where the more-talented team just was unable to break through against, supposedly, an inferior opponent. From this report from local soccer blog FiftyFive.One it looked like the Wolfpack weren't playing much in form, either, so, I guess it was just "one of those things." Except that it shouldn't have been one of those things.
They finished with their best-ever record of 16-3-4 overall, yet they went one-and-done. So, in my mind, the program's team with the second-best record ever, the one that went 22-4 in 2008, still stands as the U.'s best ever because that team made it to the Sweet 16 (which, by the way, they played at home; I've told this story a million times already, but I was at the game, one in which it was so cold the Coke I bought froze. And visiting Georgetown won the match with ten seconds left to go in the second period of Added Extra Time. Simply heartbreaking). This team had their chance; they were supposed to lose in the Sweet 16 at Stanford. But they failed to do that, so they cannot be looked at too fondly, I'm afraid.
And who knows if they'll ascend to such heights again? This team loses Kolander, Hobbs, Stiever and Defender Rashida Beal to graduation. Who will take their places? Anyone?
Thursday, November 17, 2016
Two Held-Up Hands = Two Middle Fingers?
OK, so legendary Canadian donut store Tim Hortons opened up its first store in Minnesota (well, I heard that there was one somewhere around the state for a spell in the early nineties) at the Mall of America. And I was all, "Boss!" Because even though I had pretty shitty customer service at the TH across from our hotel when we were in Toronto, I thought the donuts and coffee were pretty good.
I was going to go when for their grand opening, which I heard on Monday (or was it the weekend?) that it was going to be Thursday, so I thought, "Cool! The Megamall is right by my work. I'll just wake up early one of these days, go there, pick up some donuts and coffee, and enjoy it in my cube!" But then I actually read the article and saw that the store wasn't going to open up until 11, right in the middle of my day. I guess Tim Hortons sees donuts and coffee as lunch food. So I was like, "Man!"
But then yesterday I read that Tim Hortons was open Tuesday. That was the soft opening, but apparently, they were already open last week. So I thought, "Well, hell, why don't I get the donuts and coffee tomorrow morning? And I'll volunteer to grab something for my co-worker! That sounds neat!"
So I wake up early and drive early to the Megamall (a traffic stop on the way through the tunnel really helped clear out the cars) and I get to Tim Hortons and the damn thing's closed. There are, oh, 6-12 people lined up. And then it slowly dawned on me: Even though they were open as early as 7 these days since last week, they will only open at 11 today, which is the grand opening. So they're just changing opening times today for some fucking reason.
The General Manager (I guess) said as much. The people waiting outside probably are Tim Hortons diehards who wanted to get all the prizes that comes with being the first 50 people to go through the TH, even though the goddamn store's been open since last week. Those people waiting probably are also unemployed. I am not unemployed, so when the GM told me the spiel, all of which I already knew or was able to discern, I threw both my hands up, said "Thanks," said "Fuck" to myself, and left for here.
I was pissed. Still am. It's one of those things where, based on information, I thought one thing, and so I prepared myself in order to achieve this one thing, but it didn't happen because, frankly, they weren't clear. A way-younger me would have thrown a tantrum and/or gave the GM and the people waiting in line and the store two middle fingers. So I wonder if throwing my hands up was my sublimated way to do the same thing as a grown-up. Well, if so, I'm not sure if held-up hands conveys the same "screw you" sentiment as the double bird.
Well, I'll try and go tomorrow. Hopefully I'll wake up in time and/or not get into an accident because it's going to snow.
I was going to go when for their grand opening, which I heard on Monday (or was it the weekend?) that it was going to be Thursday, so I thought, "Cool! The Megamall is right by my work. I'll just wake up early one of these days, go there, pick up some donuts and coffee, and enjoy it in my cube!" But then I actually read the article and saw that the store wasn't going to open up until 11, right in the middle of my day. I guess Tim Hortons sees donuts and coffee as lunch food. So I was like, "Man!"
But then yesterday I read that Tim Hortons was open Tuesday. That was the soft opening, but apparently, they were already open last week. So I thought, "Well, hell, why don't I get the donuts and coffee tomorrow morning? And I'll volunteer to grab something for my co-worker! That sounds neat!"
So I wake up early and drive early to the Megamall (a traffic stop on the way through the tunnel really helped clear out the cars) and I get to Tim Hortons and the damn thing's closed. There are, oh, 6-12 people lined up. And then it slowly dawned on me: Even though they were open as early as 7 these days since last week, they will only open at 11 today, which is the grand opening. So they're just changing opening times today for some fucking reason.
The General Manager (I guess) said as much. The people waiting outside probably are Tim Hortons diehards who wanted to get all the prizes that comes with being the first 50 people to go through the TH, even though the goddamn store's been open since last week. Those people waiting probably are also unemployed. I am not unemployed, so when the GM told me the spiel, all of which I already knew or was able to discern, I threw both my hands up, said "Thanks," said "Fuck" to myself, and left for here.
I was pissed. Still am. It's one of those things where, based on information, I thought one thing, and so I prepared myself in order to achieve this one thing, but it didn't happen because, frankly, they weren't clear. A way-younger me would have thrown a tantrum and/or gave the GM and the people waiting in line and the store two middle fingers. So I wonder if throwing my hands up was my sublimated way to do the same thing as a grown-up. Well, if so, I'm not sure if held-up hands conveys the same "screw you" sentiment as the double bird.
Well, I'll try and go tomorrow. Hopefully I'll wake up in time and/or not get into an accident because it's going to snow.
Wednesday, November 16, 2016
She's So Co-o-old
Longtime readers of WAF may remember that I had spent a lot of time over the years, off and on, doing this hearing experiment at the University of Minnesota. It was a type of study where I would put on headphones, sit in front of a computer, hear a series of bloops and blips and select which of what usually were three tones was different from the others. In my very unemployed days, I would be at this lab three days a week, two hours at a time. It wasn't much -- it's only ten bucks an hour -- but it gave me a sense of purpose. Otherwise I would be just hanging out and living life. That's great, but I know I would get really flabby if I spent summer after summer without any commitments whatsoever.
I hadn't been at the lab for at least a couple years. They always have fliers going up about some experiments going on, and I e-mail the particular tech spearheading them, but I never get a reply. The last time I did do a session there I fell asleep and she caught me because she had a monitor which had the session on her computer and she noticed that I hadn't hit any of the numbers to indicate I was actually listening to these bleeps and bloops. So yeah, maybe I had a reason to avoid them.
But then, a couple weeks ago, out of the blue, the main professor of the lab and a tech e-mailed me about a session. I felt flattered to be invited back for something that wasn't going to last too long -- two sessions and the second probably wouldn't last two hours.
The first session was last night; although I was dead tired from work and the night, I made it a couple minutes early. When I rang the doorbell I saw this big-eyed beauty with faint Nordic facial features and a sweater with dots on it that was short enough where, if she bent over enough you could see the small of her back, but let's not dwell on that.
Instead, let's dwell on the fact that she was a cold millennial. I wasn't looking for five-star service from a restaurant or anything, but when we got done with the first portion of this special test, where I had to take out these one-time-use ear plugs and I didn't know where to put them, she said, "You can throw them in the wastebasket outside. We'll be moving to another booth." Now, I wasn't expecting her to take those plugs and throw them away for me. But ... it was just the tone of her voice that kind of set me off. And her body language and her ... uh, non-warm way of speaking with me, and the fact that she wouldn't hold open the heavy booth doors for me even though I needed to open them to get around her and into the booths -- she just struck me as disinterested, like I was a part of a process she needed to get through just so she can say she did it. I don't know, I guess you had to be there.
The worst part, however, came at the end. I got there at 6, so I should have been done at 8. At 7:54 she pops her head into the booth and tells me there is one 15-minute session left; I could come back another day, or I could just stay a bit later and finish the whole experiment. (Guess that first session became the only session.) I figured I might as well stay and finish this whole damn thing.
So, around 8:11 I get out of the booth with absolutely no help from her. She opens up this locked file where all the money is. I need to fill out my information in order to get the money. Now, this is ten bucks an hour. I stayed an extra, oh, 11 minutes. It would stand to reason that since I stayed a little longer (and remember I got to the lab a little early, which is rare, I will admit), I would get paid a little more. How much that bitch pay me? Twenty bucks. For two hours and 11 minutes, I got paid the same as two hours. Was it because I went to the bathroom an hour into the session? That'd be news to me; before I took 15 minutes to poop in the men's room, and I still got paid $20 for two hours total.
I got this dismissive and unwelcoming vibe from this student, this millennial very early into my work at the lab, and when I learned that she was stiffing me money, well, I was kind of glad I was leaving and hopefully never seeing her again, even though in retrospect I should have left and done the session another day because then I would get fully paid for my time. As I write this I wonder if I should send a message to the professor about this -- not to get more money, but to cover my ass in case I have to complain about this again.
Nah, I probably won't. No reason to pick fights in a war I don't plan on re-joining, to strain a metaphor.
Tuesday, November 15, 2016
Expenses Without Receipts
Starting from Monday, November 14:
- I was a good boy and didn't spend anything on the 14th or the 13th, and on the 12th everything I spent I have receipts for. So, on Veteran's Day (aka Friday the 11th), I went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Division) because I couldn't bear to watch the election autopsy on Washington Week. (And by the way, host Gwen Ifill died! Oh my God! I didn't even know she was sick!) There I saw ********a, who did not invite me to a stripper party I wasn't able to go to. Got a dance with her, and we got close -- emotionally, not sexually. That might come later. With coffee and tips and the total was: $27.75.
- Went to Glam Doll afterwards. They had a special pumpkin chai-filled donut which was really good. Didn't think I would like anything flavored with chai. With tip: $9.81.
- ETA at 4:45 p.m. on November 18 that I went to my favorite art gallery for the first time in some time. They had an exhibition about this digital photographer who manipulates his "paintings." Very vivid. Gave some money for a regular-sized Pabst Blue Ribbon, then I donated an equal amount for the gallery in the cashbox. Total: $6.
- Tuesday the 8th, aka Election Day ... eeeeeeeeeee-AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The Herkimer Pub in Uptown publicize a watch party. It was so busy I was standing the whole time I was there. Beer plus tip: $7.
- On Saturday the 5th, after watching my team beat the hell out of Oregon (about time), I went to Glam Doll to celebrate. And for some reason my laptop could not connect with the store's wi-fi, so I spent my time doodling on my phone. At least I remembered to note how much I spent there on that day, something I forgot about as I was typing this. Phew! With tip: $12.27.
- I found pennies this day, at the gym in the afternoon and at Glam Doll at night. An Infusion of: 2 cents.
- Friday, November 4 ... I had been meaning to go to another Mensa meeting. I really want to be a part of this club, but I had only been to their First Friday cotillion (it's more like a meet-up) once. It was time to go again. I met the only person I knew out of the club there, again, and so I bought her a drink, a half-orange juice/half-water. Huh? You need to cut the sting of OJ? I got a 7 & Seven for myself. With the tip for both drinks and the cover to get in, it came out to: $11.75.
- On Tuesday the 1st I popped my head into My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Version). Managed to see *e***** there, so I got a lapper from her. With coffee and tips: $29.75.
- For Halloween I started my morning getting to Bogart's Doughnuts in Kingfield. I heard that they were serving special doughnuts filled with Twix and Mounds bars. Had to buy one of each, and of course they were fattening and good! With tip: $7.
- Work was having another fundraising sale, and once again they offered caramel apples. It was pay-as-you-like, and I liked to pay: $3.
- That evening, because it was Halloween, I stayed out of my neighborhood. And, per convention, I went to a strip club. However, since it was close to my work, after work I went to My Favorite Stripclub (Cover Edition) for the first time in the evening. And man, it was slow and depressing. I stayed there for an hour. They didn't even open up the lower stage until a half-hour after I got in. There were two dancers there just going around giving stand-up dances for $10 a song, although I saw a third that was dancing on the stage as I left. One of the two came up to me and hustled me for four songs. Her name was either Princess or Queen Ava or Eva of something like that. And to me, if your stripper name is two words, and the first word is a title that you gave to yourself, you're not that good of a stripper. Well, she wasn't a bitch or anything, but while she did carry a conversation, I wasn't too engaged with it. My cock was harder eating at Hooters afterward. With beer and tips: $46.
- Oh, and I found a penny somewhere. An Infusion of: 1 cent.
- Saturday, October 30 was the Quarterfinal of the Big Ten Women's Soccer Tournament, and the top-seeded Gophers crushed Indiana that afternoon, 3-1. There were no programs for sale; did someone screw them up? Thought that the souvenir cup was of a design I had never seen before, so I bought it. Turns out it was the medium size and not the large. You would think that special cups would be the largest size they offer. That medium/souvenir Coke plus a hot dog cost me: $11.
- That evening was a good time to dispense with the currency that was in too mint a condition to spend. Had back-to-back dollar bills with consecutive serial numbers, and even though I usually don't save only two bills side-by-side, I did in this case. Also, I think the quarters this year commemorate Harpers Ferry on the tail side, and I got a shiny and unscratched one as change. Therefore I put into storage: $2.25.
Monday, November 14, 2016
Don't Give Him A Chance. Be Afraid.
I am commenting on two things on TV I did not see, the first because I was busy watching college football (The Day Of Upsets finally came!), the second because I refused to watch it. Yep, both things are about politics. Because these things are going to be affecting my life -- our lives -- for the next two, four years.
I heard many people regard Dave Chappelle's monologue on this week's Saturday Night Live to be historic for the show. I did see the last two minutes on Twitter, when he turned serious:
It was beautiful, and I admire Chappelle sharing his story, and I totally believe he was speaking from the heart when he said he was going to give Donald Trump a chance. Unfortunately, sir, I think that is absolutely fucking naive.
The second thing on TV I did not see was the Trump victory interview on 60 Minutes. I am not one of those people who point my finger at the media for helping this shit to happen. In fact, the more I think of it, the more I believe that Trump was going to score this "upset" victory no matter what happened. So I still believe 60 Minutes is a legitimate, and in fact very worthy, news program (all the rarer for it regularly airing on broadcast prime time). But so long as they cover President Trump (which I understand they have to do -- after all, he is our President), I cannot and will not watch any Trump story that shows him in a non-critical light. I respect the presidency; I sure as hell don't respect him.
And I give no credence to the answer he gave Lesley Stahl when she asked him to respond to people who did not vote for him and/or the people marching in protest of his win Tuesday: "Don't be afraid."
Oh, bullshit. Goddamn bullshit artist is lying in our faces again. It worked with the stupid people who thinks he can magically bring back jobs by doing one of his business deals. And I'm afraid it'll work now, although this time he's not trying to persuade voters who felt humiliated over the past 8-30 years. No, it's worse; he's trying to placate people who are really scared of what he is going to do and are so desperate to hear anything to the contrary that they'll believe it. Brand new suckers to swallow down his toxic semen.
I am pushing back and responding to two different statements: Don't give him a chance, and be afraid. I'll try and be clear in arguments answering to each, and then attempt to tie them together into a grand repudiation of a dictator we elected as our leader, but that might be extremely hard. To someone who's a Trump supporting-Republican, that might seem contradictory, even hypocritical. But I chalk that up to someone who can't understand that things in real life aren't black-and-white.
OK, first up, don't give him a chance. There are a couple reasons why you shouldn't, and why giving him such a chance is dangerous. First of all, like I have said, words do matter. Some dumbasses give him a pass when it came to the bile about Mexicans and Muslims and people he has personally insulted during his campaign by saying, "Oh, it's just words." They haven't been bullied in junior high school before. And by the way, Trump has backed up those words with racist actions, such as with not accepting applications from African-Americans to his real estate properties, or demanding the death penalty for the Central Park Five. You don't reward that behavior -- not at all. And that includes depriving him of that chance many so eagerly want to give him.
The second reason kind of blends in with my belief that you definitely should be afraid of this guy, and this also starts to speculate as to why kind of tyrannical government we're about to have. His policies, vague as they are, include deporting illegal immigrant and extremely vetting refugees from war-torn countries, especially Muslims. If he is a man of his word, he is about to enact racist policies, and the prejudicial message that will arise from that will have to be stopped by protesting at the top of our lungs, from everybody who hates them. I don't feel like waiting to see how this racist policies work out. I have a feeling they won't work out so well.
Now, if he is not a man of his word -- well, then, that shows that he is an opportunist who will say anything, and hurt anyone, in order to get what he wants. It appears as though those things he wants are power, fame and, of course, fortune. (I'll quickly mention that he probably is in hock with the Russians and that he never revealed his taxes -- and the American people let him get away with that.) Already, some are speculating that he is shifting into the role he wants -- not as CEO of the United States, but as its Head Of State, or a king:
Mr. Eichenwald also says that rage is not the way to appropriately battle Trump and the dark forces he is now putative leader of. No, I cannot. Rage is totally appropriate because that's the only way to publicize the con job he managed to pull on the American people. Sitting back and telling Trump voters they own the guy doesn't punish Trump and the Trump administration, especially when you consider the true damage he and the Republican-led government that somehow swept into power now can wreak over the next two years. Remember: He's not just their President. He's our President. What he does and does not do affects all of us. It was just their decision that won.
Now, to being afraid. If he is a man of his word, there are obviously a lot of people who have reason to be scared: Families of undocumented immigrants, the Muslim community, blacks who may be stopped-and-frisked, etc. Already his victory is a signal to the Racists Among Us that it's OK to come out of the woodwork and desecrate churches with Nazi signs, to march for him with their white hoods on, and to question if a black guy really is a veteran who gets a free meal at Chili's. All of this, and he's not even the goddamn president yet. He, and all the people who voted for him, should be held responsible for this.
If Trump is not a man of his word, may I remind you that there are people he works with, like Steve Bannon and the Koch brothers, and people he works for, such as Vladimir Putin. They have skin in this game, and you know goddamn well they're going to get something in exchange for the help (in terms of publicity and money) they gave him on his way to being immortalized as President. My money is on, well, money; they're going to get millions of dollars, none of which we'll see because Trump controls the government now and he has no interest in telling the people who voted for him what he'll do. (Not that his cocksucker fans care.) But there are conservative Republicans in Congress who don't believe in everything that he may or may not stand for.
So, if Trump is a businessman, a deal-maker, he's going to make deals. Will he trade, say, his opposition to the Trans-Pacific Partnership in exchange for increased funding for Immigration and Customs Enforcement? Will he sell off our national parks to Russian-backed oil companies to drill in in exchange for sweet multi-million-dollar real estate deals (or forgiveness of a possible huge debt) once he leaves office? Could happen.
Now, some stupid people will say that this is just compromise. They need to understand that this nation just elected a businessman to lead it. I hold our national security, our public parks, my healthcare, and the safety and security of the people in this country (although right now it's very, very hard to give a shit about those who voted for that asshole) as sacred rights I have as an American. Those are merely assets to be traded back and forth to Trump. We needed someone who gives a shit about this job. Instead we elected a huckster, one who's backed and may be controlled by smarter and more sinister people who will get what they want from this country and now have the means to do so. We're losing something we hold dear; I just don't know what. And that makes me quite afraid, and rightly so.
---
I really don't consider myself to be politically active, but that this country decided to fuck itself has shaken me to my core. When I am wishing that the guy who will lead the U.S. is just an idiot and not a greedy and evil dictator, I kind of have to obsess over what's going on in life, sorry to say. In fact, I don't know the next time I can talk about my sexual exploits or porn.
But my world got rocked on Tuesday. I now have to be vigilant. I don't know if I have the stomach to do anything beyond that, but I tried to stay quiet before and look what happened. So it looks like talking about this is a cause I don't mind being an asshole about. Obstructing Trump and his Republicans every step of his reign as leader may be of the few ways we can stop him from ruining the lives of all the good people who live in this country.
So I implore you: Be very afraid. And don't ever give him a chance.
I heard many people regard Dave Chappelle's monologue on this week's Saturday Night Live to be historic for the show. I did see the last two minutes on Twitter, when he turned serious:
The last couple minutes of Dave Chappelle's #ChappelleOnSNL monologue. pic.twitter.com/PHyc2bbtay— Saturday Night Live (@nbcsnl) November 13, 2016
It was beautiful, and I admire Chappelle sharing his story, and I totally believe he was speaking from the heart when he said he was going to give Donald Trump a chance. Unfortunately, sir, I think that is absolutely fucking naive.
The second thing on TV I did not see was the Trump victory interview on 60 Minutes. I am not one of those people who point my finger at the media for helping this shit to happen. In fact, the more I think of it, the more I believe that Trump was going to score this "upset" victory no matter what happened. So I still believe 60 Minutes is a legitimate, and in fact very worthy, news program (all the rarer for it regularly airing on broadcast prime time). But so long as they cover President Trump (which I understand they have to do -- after all, he is our President), I cannot and will not watch any Trump story that shows him in a non-critical light. I respect the presidency; I sure as hell don't respect him.
And I give no credence to the answer he gave Lesley Stahl when she asked him to respond to people who did not vote for him and/or the people marching in protest of his win Tuesday: "Don't be afraid."
Oh, bullshit. Goddamn bullshit artist is lying in our faces again. It worked with the stupid people who thinks he can magically bring back jobs by doing one of his business deals. And I'm afraid it'll work now, although this time he's not trying to persuade voters who felt humiliated over the past 8-30 years. No, it's worse; he's trying to placate people who are really scared of what he is going to do and are so desperate to hear anything to the contrary that they'll believe it. Brand new suckers to swallow down his toxic semen.
I am pushing back and responding to two different statements: Don't give him a chance, and be afraid. I'll try and be clear in arguments answering to each, and then attempt to tie them together into a grand repudiation of a dictator we elected as our leader, but that might be extremely hard. To someone who's a Trump supporting-Republican, that might seem contradictory, even hypocritical. But I chalk that up to someone who can't understand that things in real life aren't black-and-white.
OK, first up, don't give him a chance. There are a couple reasons why you shouldn't, and why giving him such a chance is dangerous. First of all, like I have said, words do matter. Some dumbasses give him a pass when it came to the bile about Mexicans and Muslims and people he has personally insulted during his campaign by saying, "Oh, it's just words." They haven't been bullied in junior high school before. And by the way, Trump has backed up those words with racist actions, such as with not accepting applications from African-Americans to his real estate properties, or demanding the death penalty for the Central Park Five. You don't reward that behavior -- not at all. And that includes depriving him of that chance many so eagerly want to give him.
The second reason kind of blends in with my belief that you definitely should be afraid of this guy, and this also starts to speculate as to why kind of tyrannical government we're about to have. His policies, vague as they are, include deporting illegal immigrant and extremely vetting refugees from war-torn countries, especially Muslims. If he is a man of his word, he is about to enact racist policies, and the prejudicial message that will arise from that will have to be stopped by protesting at the top of our lungs, from everybody who hates them. I don't feel like waiting to see how this racist policies work out. I have a feeling they won't work out so well.
Now, if he is not a man of his word -- well, then, that shows that he is an opportunist who will say anything, and hurt anyone, in order to get what he wants. It appears as though those things he wants are power, fame and, of course, fortune. (I'll quickly mention that he probably is in hock with the Russians and that he never revealed his taxes -- and the American people let him get away with that.) Already, some are speculating that he is shifting into the role he wants -- not as CEO of the United States, but as its Head Of State, or a king:
As one who's known Trump since '87, I told his fans this was a con. Didnt want 2 BE president, wants to be CALLED prez. Proving it already.— Kurt Eichenwald (@kurteichenwald) November 13, 2016
Mr. Eichenwald also says that rage is not the way to appropriately battle Trump and the dark forces he is now putative leader of. No, I cannot. Rage is totally appropriate because that's the only way to publicize the con job he managed to pull on the American people. Sitting back and telling Trump voters they own the guy doesn't punish Trump and the Trump administration, especially when you consider the true damage he and the Republican-led government that somehow swept into power now can wreak over the next two years. Remember: He's not just their President. He's our President. What he does and does not do affects all of us. It was just their decision that won.
Now, to being afraid. If he is a man of his word, there are obviously a lot of people who have reason to be scared: Families of undocumented immigrants, the Muslim community, blacks who may be stopped-and-frisked, etc. Already his victory is a signal to the Racists Among Us that it's OK to come out of the woodwork and desecrate churches with Nazi signs, to march for him with their white hoods on, and to question if a black guy really is a veteran who gets a free meal at Chili's. All of this, and he's not even the goddamn president yet. He, and all the people who voted for him, should be held responsible for this.
If Trump is not a man of his word, may I remind you that there are people he works with, like Steve Bannon and the Koch brothers, and people he works for, such as Vladimir Putin. They have skin in this game, and you know goddamn well they're going to get something in exchange for the help (in terms of publicity and money) they gave him on his way to being immortalized as President. My money is on, well, money; they're going to get millions of dollars, none of which we'll see because Trump controls the government now and he has no interest in telling the people who voted for him what he'll do. (Not that his cocksucker fans care.) But there are conservative Republicans in Congress who don't believe in everything that he may or may not stand for.
So, if Trump is a businessman, a deal-maker, he's going to make deals. Will he trade, say, his opposition to the Trans-Pacific Partnership in exchange for increased funding for Immigration and Customs Enforcement? Will he sell off our national parks to Russian-backed oil companies to drill in in exchange for sweet multi-million-dollar real estate deals (or forgiveness of a possible huge debt) once he leaves office? Could happen.
Now, some stupid people will say that this is just compromise. They need to understand that this nation just elected a businessman to lead it. I hold our national security, our public parks, my healthcare, and the safety and security of the people in this country (although right now it's very, very hard to give a shit about those who voted for that asshole) as sacred rights I have as an American. Those are merely assets to be traded back and forth to Trump. We needed someone who gives a shit about this job. Instead we elected a huckster, one who's backed and may be controlled by smarter and more sinister people who will get what they want from this country and now have the means to do so. We're losing something we hold dear; I just don't know what. And that makes me quite afraid, and rightly so.
---
I really don't consider myself to be politically active, but that this country decided to fuck itself has shaken me to my core. When I am wishing that the guy who will lead the U.S. is just an idiot and not a greedy and evil dictator, I kind of have to obsess over what's going on in life, sorry to say. In fact, I don't know the next time I can talk about my sexual exploits or porn.
But my world got rocked on Tuesday. I now have to be vigilant. I don't know if I have the stomach to do anything beyond that, but I tried to stay quiet before and look what happened. So it looks like talking about this is a cause I don't mind being an asshole about. Obstructing Trump and his Republicans every step of his reign as leader may be of the few ways we can stop him from ruining the lives of all the good people who live in this country.
So I implore you: Be very afraid. And don't ever give him a chance.
Sunday, November 13, 2016
I don't really have anything I need to do today. So, while watching the game last night I got a text from my friend who works in independent, micro-budget movies. I haven't seen this guy in a while, and he has reached out through social media about finding extras who would be in the movies he's a part of. Having someone personally text you, however, cuts through the noise of a message intended for a wider audience, many of whom you don't know.
So, what the hell, I say? After the shit that happened Tuesday, I want to feel better about myself by helping a friend (a friend, by the way, I am certain voted for Trump, and I am going to presume he will do the right thing and shut his mouth about it). So I text back, "Yeah."
And that's where I made my mistake. What I texted next was, "Where is it?" And he said, "Delano." And I go, "Where is Delano?" Because, you see, I don't know where Delano is, and if that's the case, that's probably because it's in a part of town I don't usually go -- like out of The Loop.
Which is where it is; I just looked up the address, and my God, it's in the boonies. (It actually not too far from where my brother, sister-in-law and niece live.) I'm driving 40 miles each way to be an extra in my friend's movie for free. I should have asked where it was before I said yes.
Welp, off to gassing up my car and loading up on provisions before my trek to Trumpland Minnesota.
So, what the hell, I say? After the shit that happened Tuesday, I want to feel better about myself by helping a friend (a friend, by the way, I am certain voted for Trump, and I am going to presume he will do the right thing and shut his mouth about it). So I text back, "Yeah."
And that's where I made my mistake. What I texted next was, "Where is it?" And he said, "Delano." And I go, "Where is Delano?" Because, you see, I don't know where Delano is, and if that's the case, that's probably because it's in a part of town I don't usually go -- like out of The Loop.
Which is where it is; I just looked up the address, and my God, it's in the boonies. (It actually not too far from where my brother, sister-in-law and niece live.) I'm driving 40 miles each way to be an extra in my friend's movie for free. I should have asked where it was before I said yes.
Welp, off to gassing up my car and loading up on provisions before my trek to Trumpland Minnesota.
Saturday, November 12, 2016
Got Ripped Off Twice
OK, so last Saturday I decided to have lunch. I didn't really know where I wanted to go, but I was going to go to the library, so I decided to pop into Burger King because I finally wanted to try their Cheetos chicken fries.
So I go in there and I order them, but the girl who was helping me out said the Cheetos chicken fries were discontinued. But they were up on the menu board. They were still fucking advertising these fucking things! So how can they be discontinued! I wanted to tell her that, and actually I wanted to yell at her like that, but I got so discombobulated that I just left BK muttering to myself. But I still don't understand: If you don't have the item anymore, why in the hell don't you take it down? And she was just looking at me like, "Huh?"
Walking to my car in the parking lot I see at Chipotle on the other side. Well, I might as well, I thought to myself, but hey, at least I can now use the Chipotle frequent-eater's card. Haven't used it since the summer, so I thought it was time to put some sandwiches on it.
So I order my burrito and I show the cashier my card, and she goes, "Oh, that Chiptopia card? That was only for the summer." What the fuck?! I wouldn't've eaten at Chipotle if that card expired. And now I have to go through with this because they already made the burrito. I couldn't just walk up and not pay for a burrito they made ... right? In that sense Chipotle was worse than Burger King, because at BK I could just leave without losing my money. I did at Chipotle, though, even though I only rounded up my change as a tip. And, well, the people at Chipotle were nicer, so there's that.
Today for lunch I made it easier on myself. I cut out a coupon to Culver's, checked the date to see if it was still good, and went there instead to order a value basket. No discontinued items or frequent-eater's cards to worry about.
So I go in there and I order them, but the girl who was helping me out said the Cheetos chicken fries were discontinued. But they were up on the menu board. They were still fucking advertising these fucking things! So how can they be discontinued! I wanted to tell her that, and actually I wanted to yell at her like that, but I got so discombobulated that I just left BK muttering to myself. But I still don't understand: If you don't have the item anymore, why in the hell don't you take it down? And she was just looking at me like, "Huh?"
Walking to my car in the parking lot I see at Chipotle on the other side. Well, I might as well, I thought to myself, but hey, at least I can now use the Chipotle frequent-eater's card. Haven't used it since the summer, so I thought it was time to put some sandwiches on it.
So I order my burrito and I show the cashier my card, and she goes, "Oh, that Chiptopia card? That was only for the summer." What the fuck?! I wouldn't've eaten at Chipotle if that card expired. And now I have to go through with this because they already made the burrito. I couldn't just walk up and not pay for a burrito they made ... right? In that sense Chipotle was worse than Burger King, because at BK I could just leave without losing my money. I did at Chipotle, though, even though I only rounded up my change as a tip. And, well, the people at Chipotle were nicer, so there's that.
Today for lunch I made it easier on myself. I cut out a coupon to Culver's, checked the date to see if it was still good, and went there instead to order a value basket. No discontinued items or frequent-eater's cards to worry about.
But I Have My Weekend Free!
So this weekend there is no Vikings game I have to work. And even though I have to host my alma mater's big game Saturday evening (which convinced me I didn't really have time to go to the X and watch the title games of the Minnesota State Girls' Volleyball Tournament; I did go last year, but that's because that week's game happened on Friday), my weekend was totally free.
I knew the Gopher women's soccer team was going to start their run in the NCAA Tournament hosting N.C. St., and I thought there was a great chance I'd see it. They'd play it in the day, when it's warm, and not at night, where it's cold -- well, it's not cold now, global warming is seeing to that, but it's just better in the day, right? Well, like I mentioned in yesterday's Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey, the school decided to play this game Saturday night, right when my alma mater's game is on. Crap.
Well, at least I would have time to wake up early and go downtown to watch English Premier League games, either on Saturday or Sunday or both days. But wait ... they're not playing this weekend. It's an "international" weekend, where I guess countries are playing other countries. The entire league basically has a bye this week? This garbage wouldn't fly in America.
So besides hosting the game, I have my entire weekend free, but I have nothing to do. Guess I'll exercise and/or clean my room or something.
I knew the Gopher women's soccer team was going to start their run in the NCAA Tournament hosting N.C. St., and I thought there was a great chance I'd see it. They'd play it in the day, when it's warm, and not at night, where it's cold -- well, it's not cold now, global warming is seeing to that, but it's just better in the day, right? Well, like I mentioned in yesterday's Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey, the school decided to play this game Saturday night, right when my alma mater's game is on. Crap.
Well, at least I would have time to wake up early and go downtown to watch English Premier League games, either on Saturday or Sunday or both days. But wait ... they're not playing this weekend. It's an "international" weekend, where I guess countries are playing other countries. The entire league basically has a bye this week? This garbage wouldn't fly in America.
So besides hosting the game, I have my entire weekend free, but I have nothing to do. Guess I'll exercise and/or clean my room or something.
Friday, November 11, 2016
The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey
#0: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -1). Congratulations to the University of Minnesota women's soccer program. For the second time in their history (and first in 21 years!), the team won the Big Ten Women's Soccer Tournament, held at home, last weekend. In Friday afternoon's semifinal, the Gophers defeated Michigan 1-0 on a cross from Juliana Gernes in the 8th minute. And in Sunday afternoon's final, vs. 7th-seeded upstart Rutgers, Emily Heslin broke a 1-all tie in Minute 84 (less than a minute after Rutger's Chantelle Swaby tied the game; Sydney Squires opened up scoring in the 27th) by rocketing a loose ball from the top of the box for the game-winning, tournament-clinching goal. It was the Sophomore Heslin's first game of the year and the second of her career. And it gave Minnesota its first double ever.
Because of that, they obviously glided into the NCAA Tournament. And for the first time ever (I don't know about that, I'm just guessing), they received one of the 16 national seeds. Specifically, they are the #4 seed in the Palo Alto Region. I was all hyped up that they were in line for a seed because that meant they not only got to host the first-round game at home this weekend, they would be in line to host the second and Sweet 16 rounds the next weekend. (I am working the Vikings game, but it was possible I would at least catch one of those games at Robbie.) But one day while lying in bed I realized that it didn't work that way. If you were going to host the second and third rounds of the tourney, it would have to be at the highest-available seed for those rounds. The Gophers' Sweet 16 opponent would be #1 seed (and actually #1 overall seed) Stanford. So they in fact will be in Palo Alta, Calif. next week, assuming they win. My bad.
The assumption is that they win, and their first-round opponent isn't a regional low-major like speculated, such as South Dakota St. or even Marquette. It's N.C. State, a program going back to the NCAAs for the first time in two decades. The Wolfpack are currently in bad form, winning once and tying once in their last seven matches. But they are a middle-of-the-road team in the powerful ACC, prime characteristics of a Cinderella.
I planned on going to the game because, besides watching my alma mater Saturday on TV, I had this weekend free. I totally had time to go to the match, right? Well, shit, Minnesota (who has moved up to 8th in the polls, by the way) decided to play this match Saturday at 7 p.m. -- the same time as my alma mater's game. I've been to so many of this club's matches, and this is the damn thanks I get? This is why these guys aren't in Positive Numbers. Sorry, it's petty, but that's how I feel. And good luck anyways.
#-1: Gopher football (Last Week: 0). Don't look now, but with their 44-31 win over Purdue at Das Bank on Saturday, this squad is 7-2. They aren't ranked in the Top 25, and appropriately so; their non-conference wins were over States Oregon and Colorado, plus they played a second-division team. But the schedule laid out in such a way where all the easy teams were grouped together and all the hard teams were grouped together. The victory over the Boilermakers finished a run of four cupcake games, and the U. won all four. In that sense, they have established, again, a level of mastery over the truly awful teams in the Big Ten. In such a hyper-competitive league where the program's glory days were a half-century ago, that's not the worst thing in the world.
However, the rubber meets the road for the last three games. First up is a road game Saturday night against a resurgent Nebraska team. Now we will see how good this team really is.
#-2: Gopher men's hockey (Last Week: -2). Oh, man, I miss the rivalry games against North Dakota, the redneck school up in the boonies with the racist name. The now-Fighting Hawks played the U. for the first time in a couple years for a pair of games at Mariucci Arena, and I hear it was festive and loud and, near the end of the second game Saturday night, antagonistic. I wish I were there.
A win and a tie for the good guys. Tommy Novak scored with an extra skater with 77 left in regulation to tie the game up at 5 Friday, where it stayed. And on Saturday, Eric Schierhorn stopped all 33 NoDak shots to preserve a 2-0 win, including a Penalty Shot from the Hawks' Brock Boeser given with 40 seconds left in the game.
For their efforts, Novak was named B1G First Star Of The Week and Mike Szmatula Third Star Of The Week. And the Gophers rose into the top 10 in the polls. They have a week off before facing MSU-Mankato in a home-and-home.
#-3: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: 0). Don't want to downgrade the team's sweep at Maryland Sunday, but ... it's Maryland. They've proven a lot, but there was nothing to prove from a nothing program like the Terrapins. This weekend's back-to-back games in Illinois (Illinois Saturday night, Northwestern Sunday night) that'll end the road portion of their regular season -- now that might mean a little more.
#-4: Wild (Last Week: -3). Lost at Colorad 1-0 Saturday, but beat the Penguins in Pittsburgh last (Thursday) night 4-2. They rode their top line to victory against the defending Stanley Cup champions. That's all I have to say. This week is very busy: At Philadelphia and Ottawa, then home to Calgary and Boston, the latter of which I will attend with my friend.
#-5: Timberwolves (Last Week: -4). I guess patience remains the name of the game with this team with extraordinary young talent. Still, losing at Oklahoma City and Brooklyn and then blowing out Orlando is testing mine. If Karl-Anthony Towns is so good now and Andrew Wiggins is flashing signs of brilliance, why aren't they winning more? They play four games this screening week, all at home -- vs. the L.A. squads this weekend, then Charlotte Tuesday and Philadelphia Thursday.
#-Infinity: Vikings (Last Week: -5). Holy fuck ... now this team is in collapse.
First of all, don't single out Blair Walsh just because he missed an Extra Point. Again. Sure, if he would have made it in that game last week versus Detroit the Lions would have had to drive all the way to the end zone in order to win the game. But from what I saw of that game (and admittedly I was busy getting a car stuck at a security checkpoint) that defense wasn't going to stop Matthew Stafford from throwing a Touchdown. Getting into Field Goal distance in a matter of 20 seconds and two plays was ample evidence of that. And beyond that -- only 16 points? The offensive line is still shit, and Sam Bradford has reverted to being the mediocre Quarterback he has been throughout his career. (And the Vikings gave up their first-round pick next year for this guy!)
What I am saying is is that, like with the Twins, the ViQueens are in Total System Failure. They looked like Super Bowl contenders three weeks ago; now, on a three-game losing streak and going into Washington, they now look like a team that'll miss the playoffs. Fixing this shit? This is on them.
Because of that, they obviously glided into the NCAA Tournament. And for the first time ever (I don't know about that, I'm just guessing), they received one of the 16 national seeds. Specifically, they are the #4 seed in the Palo Alto Region. I was all hyped up that they were in line for a seed because that meant they not only got to host the first-round game at home this weekend, they would be in line to host the second and Sweet 16 rounds the next weekend. (I am working the Vikings game, but it was possible I would at least catch one of those games at Robbie.) But one day while lying in bed I realized that it didn't work that way. If you were going to host the second and third rounds of the tourney, it would have to be at the highest-available seed for those rounds. The Gophers' Sweet 16 opponent would be #1 seed (and actually #1 overall seed) Stanford. So they in fact will be in Palo Alta, Calif. next week, assuming they win. My bad.
The assumption is that they win, and their first-round opponent isn't a regional low-major like speculated, such as South Dakota St. or even Marquette. It's N.C. State, a program going back to the NCAAs for the first time in two decades. The Wolfpack are currently in bad form, winning once and tying once in their last seven matches. But they are a middle-of-the-road team in the powerful ACC, prime characteristics of a Cinderella.
I planned on going to the game because, besides watching my alma mater Saturday on TV, I had this weekend free. I totally had time to go to the match, right? Well, shit, Minnesota (who has moved up to 8th in the polls, by the way) decided to play this match Saturday at 7 p.m. -- the same time as my alma mater's game. I've been to so many of this club's matches, and this is the damn thanks I get? This is why these guys aren't in Positive Numbers. Sorry, it's petty, but that's how I feel. And good luck anyways.
#-1: Gopher football (Last Week: 0). Don't look now, but with their 44-31 win over Purdue at Das Bank on Saturday, this squad is 7-2. They aren't ranked in the Top 25, and appropriately so; their non-conference wins were over States Oregon and Colorado, plus they played a second-division team. But the schedule laid out in such a way where all the easy teams were grouped together and all the hard teams were grouped together. The victory over the Boilermakers finished a run of four cupcake games, and the U. won all four. In that sense, they have established, again, a level of mastery over the truly awful teams in the Big Ten. In such a hyper-competitive league where the program's glory days were a half-century ago, that's not the worst thing in the world.
However, the rubber meets the road for the last three games. First up is a road game Saturday night against a resurgent Nebraska team. Now we will see how good this team really is.
#-2: Gopher men's hockey (Last Week: -2). Oh, man, I miss the rivalry games against North Dakota, the redneck school up in the boonies with the racist name. The now-Fighting Hawks played the U. for the first time in a couple years for a pair of games at Mariucci Arena, and I hear it was festive and loud and, near the end of the second game Saturday night, antagonistic. I wish I were there.
A win and a tie for the good guys. Tommy Novak scored with an extra skater with 77 left in regulation to tie the game up at 5 Friday, where it stayed. And on Saturday, Eric Schierhorn stopped all 33 NoDak shots to preserve a 2-0 win, including a Penalty Shot from the Hawks' Brock Boeser given with 40 seconds left in the game.
For their efforts, Novak was named B1G First Star Of The Week and Mike Szmatula Third Star Of The Week. And the Gophers rose into the top 10 in the polls. They have a week off before facing MSU-Mankato in a home-and-home.
#-3: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: 0). Don't want to downgrade the team's sweep at Maryland Sunday, but ... it's Maryland. They've proven a lot, but there was nothing to prove from a nothing program like the Terrapins. This weekend's back-to-back games in Illinois (Illinois Saturday night, Northwestern Sunday night) that'll end the road portion of their regular season -- now that might mean a little more.
#-4: Wild (Last Week: -3). Lost at Colorad 1-0 Saturday, but beat the Penguins in Pittsburgh last (Thursday) night 4-2. They rode their top line to victory against the defending Stanley Cup champions. That's all I have to say. This week is very busy: At Philadelphia and Ottawa, then home to Calgary and Boston, the latter of which I will attend with my friend.
#-5: Timberwolves (Last Week: -4). I guess patience remains the name of the game with this team with extraordinary young talent. Still, losing at Oklahoma City and Brooklyn and then blowing out Orlando is testing mine. If Karl-Anthony Towns is so good now and Andrew Wiggins is flashing signs of brilliance, why aren't they winning more? They play four games this screening week, all at home -- vs. the L.A. squads this weekend, then Charlotte Tuesday and Philadelphia Thursday.
#-Infinity: Vikings (Last Week: -5). Holy fuck ... now this team is in collapse.
First of all, don't single out Blair Walsh just because he missed an Extra Point. Again. Sure, if he would have made it in that game last week versus Detroit the Lions would have had to drive all the way to the end zone in order to win the game. But from what I saw of that game (and admittedly I was busy getting a car stuck at a security checkpoint) that defense wasn't going to stop Matthew Stafford from throwing a Touchdown. Getting into Field Goal distance in a matter of 20 seconds and two plays was ample evidence of that. And beyond that -- only 16 points? The offensive line is still shit, and Sam Bradford has reverted to being the mediocre Quarterback he has been throughout his career. (And the Vikings gave up their first-round pick next year for this guy!)
What I am saying is is that, like with the Twins, the ViQueens are in Total System Failure. They looked like Super Bowl contenders three weeks ago; now, on a three-game losing streak and going into Washington, they now look like a team that'll miss the playoffs. Fixing this shit? This is on them.
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