Positive Numbers: Gopher softball (Last Week: Positive Numbers). OK, this is an historic run for the softball program. They have never been this good, ever. They may reach the Women's College World Series in Oklahoma City, Okla., for the first time ever. Hell, they should. Because this team has demonstrated they are now a national title contender.
Their six wins this screening week extends their program-best winning streak to 19 games. Three of those six victories were shutouts. The whole weekend series at Cowles Stadium this weekend versus Purdue ended early -- two five-inning games and (slackers) one six-inning game. They allowed four runs during that stretch, three of those in the series-ending doubleheader against the Boilermakers which was rijiggered because rain was forecast for Sunday's game (which is accurate; it's raining now). Oh, and the team has now reached its highest ranking ever for Golden Gopher softball at #4. This team is really damn good, and now I have to see them play -- hopefully in a regional, preferably in a super-regional.
The regular season ends for them next week. Like the baseball team (see below), they will be playing at Penn St. I wonder if the softball and baseball teams are going to share the same plane. They should.
#0: Twins (Last Week: -2). Yesterday's (Saturday's) game was postponed because of rain, and that'll be made up in July, I think. (Footnote: As of right now, today's/Sunday's game is being delayed by rain.) So it's possible the organization traveled down to K.C. for just one game.
OK. So for the screening week, the Twins have gone 3-2. Got drubbed by Detroit 13-4, then won two-of-three in Arlington. Two players who have been singled out for their improved play are Placido Polanco (actually he's been playing well for a while) and, for his patience, Miguel Sano.
Sorry, I have nothing else to add. The team returns home for series against Oakland and Boston.
#-1: United FC (Re-Entry!). If you think about it, this team, not even reaching double digit matches in its top-flight soccer history, has already been through a significant roller-coaster. After allowing an historic 18 Goals to begin the year, they made some moves and brought in some new players and not only started playing competently, but well. The side's recent upswing, where they went 2-1-1, actually put the Loons into playoff position (albeit as the Western Conference's 6-seed and thus a virtual play-in game) before yesterday's (Saturday's) matchup against the San Jose Earthquakes. After lambasting this team's horrid start -- and forgive me if you think me a hypocrite for saying this; you might have a good point -- I was actually just as fearful of their recent form. This is an expansion team. They're not supposed to be going to the playoffs. And so I was afraid that their moves would jeopardize their intermediate- and long-term growth. In other words, I was, and kind of still am, worried that these guys are too good right now.
So in essence we may have overreacted to the United's shitty start and may have been spoiled by their recent run. What we fans should be expecting, and hoping for, are matches the two MNUFC had this screening week. On Sunday, versus a depleted Colorado Rapids squad that was missing several starters including USMNT Goalkeeper Tim Howard, the club had its chances and finally put in the game's only score via Miguel Ibarra's diving header. It's a grind-out type of win that you expect an organization just starting out to have -- if they win. Yesterday's 1-0 defeat to the Quakes was the flip side. Against an equally adrift squad, United just didn't have it offensively, failing to make that final pass to finish off a scoring opportunity. The defense, markedly improving from awful to, uh, average, made a mistake off a Corner Kick, which resulted in the only Goal of that game. Now, if a casual fan pays attention to the gist of this game -- new squad just couldn't score, defense played well, they just coughed up a score off a set piece -- you would think that's the typical game for an expansion team. It just feels disappointing, though -- not just because this was a vulnerable San Jose side but also because we have seen Minnesota play a lot better. Hey, I'm in this conundrum as well. Don't know what to say except that I am a season-ticketholder and I'm on this ride now matter where it goes.
They're off till next Sunday, which means they'll fall off the survey next week.
#-2: Vikings (Re-Entry!). Do we have any idea how these draft picks will pan out? No. Doesn't stop people from giving grades. Hey, cogent evaluations of draft picks requires waiting years, and patience is the providence of journalists, and you see how they get treated these days. (Some days I'm glad I didn't pursue sports reporting.) Hot-take evaluations based on no information is what sells these days, and so there were, according to the Daily Norseman, nine writers who gave the Vikings' draft a ... after calculating and averaging, a B. Well, technically, a 2.99 GPA, so just below a B, but a B nonetheless. That gets you, uh, not the bottom for the WMNSS.
My issue, and maybe the issue, is the first pick the Vikes made in the Draft, their second-round pick, Dalvin Cook out of Florida St. I have just looked into the history of his past off-the-field issues, and frankly, Joe Mixon looks like a choir boy next to Cook. Everybody was going into the NFL Draft wondering if Mixon, the Running Back out of Oklahoma, would even be drafted. He was, by the Cincinnati Bengals, a franchise that regularly takes players that have run afoul of the law. #hottake here; Mixon punching a woman in the face isn't, in the overall scheme of things, serious enough to ruin his career nor his character. Why? He had never been in trouble with the law before punching out that girl, and he really hasn't been since. (Well, there was an incident with a parking attendant, but that wasn't assault.) Therefore, you can say that what Mixon did was one very bad choice, and one that was amplified because there is security camera footage showing him decking her, which has been rebroadcast over and over again.
Now, contrast that with the history of Cook, the Seminole Running Back. He has not assaulted anyone, or at least has been convicted of assaulting anyone. All he has are incidents where he was involved -- a BB gun incident, stealing, brandishing a weapon, shit like that. But there are several instances of these small events. And in my mind, a pattern of questionable behavior is a much better indicator of a man's character than one extremely awful and dumb punch. So in that sense, I don't know how much his life off the field won't affect his career on it.
So, of course the only true way to keep those worries and troubles at bay, at least when it comes to Cook's playing days, is to fucking run. So, fuck character -- just be good at running the damn ball.
#-3: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -1). Oh, crap, what has happened to the U. baseball nine? They lost the series to Nebraska at Siebert Field Sunday, 9-4, barely outlasted the Huskies of Northern Illinois in DeKalb Tuesday, won 5-4 Friday over Illinois (also at home), then dropped both ends of a doubleheader yesterday (Saturday) by scores of 9-5 and, ick, 14-1. They now sit at 9-6 in the B1G, in a four-way tie for third in the conference, and are even farther away from the NCAA Tournament than they were before dropping two-of-three against the Cornhuskers (at least according to Baseball America). And this is the Big Ten in baseball, where quality victories are relatively hard to come by. Shoot, the two-game mid-week series the Gophers are hosting against Georgia St. won't help much because Georgia St. apparently isn't all that good. (I'd actually want to watch one of those games because of the sheer novelty of seeing a non-B1G team playing at Siebert, but I'm busy test scoring.) All they can do now is win -- those two games, and then the three games against Penn St. this weekend on the road.
Sunday, April 30, 2017
Saturday, April 29, 2017
Walked Into Walking Past Him
As I said before, I'm just doing my best to avoid this fucker at work. Going out of my way, in fact, even though he has this obnoxious knack of parking too close to me. Whatevs.
I've also noticed that his a fidgety motherfucker. He has this extremely obnoxious tic of taking his things and storing them about ten minutes before the day is over so that, once we are dismissed, he can just bolt the fuck out of there. Like he doesn't need to review his materials just in case he runs across an essay he needs to check against other papers. Asshole. He leaves early from breaks too, like a dickhead. I knew I was superior to him.
Very shortly after yesterday's (Friday's) morning break, he gets up again. All his breaks he disappears for minutes -- minutes, I tell you! That's when I decide I'm not going to be dictated by what he does and when he comes and goes. Fuck this avoidance shit!
We are asked to come in today (Saturday) to work, and I wanted to know if they were going to provide bagels for us for free like they did last Saturday. I ate one, but I still ran around before coming in to work to get McDonald's because ... uh, I don't know, I guess I had my heart set on McDonald's and I decided to get an Egg McMuffin and then a bagel. If the bagels come the second time around I figure I would get coffee but just hoard myself on bagels.
When that fucker jumped up and left the room I hesitated for a moment. I wanted to go up there and ask the room supervisor about bagels. But what if he immediately comes back? No, I told myself, he won't come back; he'll be gone for 15 minutes like he always is! Come on, be bold -- do it!!!
And I do it. I get up and walk to the front of the room. AND GODDAMMIT HERE IS THIS ANNOYING, RUDE MOTHERFUCKER COMING BACK INTO THE ROOM NOT TWO SECONDS AFTER LEAVING (what the fuck was he doing getting up so soon after break anyway? Fuckin' weirdo) walking right past me. I couldn't hide my bad goddamn luck or the hideous goddamn timing; I know I violently shook my head and uttered something that people in the front row probably was able to hear before I approached the supervisor with my question. (And BTW, she doesn't thing they're buying bagels this time around. So they're just going to capriciously choose when they want to give bagels and when they don't? What the fuck?!)
As soon as that happened I was cursing myself for making such a stupid decision. I should have just waited until he came back in -- then I would've gotten up to ask her that question. But ... goddammit, why in the hell am I letting this freak dictate what I can do and when I can do it?! Yeah, I guess avoiding him at all costs in order to mitigate any potential of a confrontation is the #1 goal. But I thought that the coast was clear when I went up there, and clearly it wasn't. But then again, who cares if I go up there and he passes by me? I mean, am I not allowed to go up and ask her a question whenever I feel like it? Why can't I go up there and ask her if this prick steps out of the room? Why can't I go up there and ask her if he's sitting (or standing -- he's now decided he can stand up in front of everybody to work -- so distracting) at his computer)? And conversely, what's his deal if I just sit at my computer and not go up to ask her anything if he steps out, or if he's in the room?
I guess I am bewildered by myself for giving this pseudo-bully power over me. I'm not asking for a fight, but altering my day and my behavior isn't right, either, and it leads to expectations that are dashed whenever I made a wrong decision that really shouldn't be categorized that way, you know?
I'm frustrated with myself. But really, all this would go away if he would go away.
I've also noticed that his a fidgety motherfucker. He has this extremely obnoxious tic of taking his things and storing them about ten minutes before the day is over so that, once we are dismissed, he can just bolt the fuck out of there. Like he doesn't need to review his materials just in case he runs across an essay he needs to check against other papers. Asshole. He leaves early from breaks too, like a dickhead. I knew I was superior to him.
Very shortly after yesterday's (Friday's) morning break, he gets up again. All his breaks he disappears for minutes -- minutes, I tell you! That's when I decide I'm not going to be dictated by what he does and when he comes and goes. Fuck this avoidance shit!
We are asked to come in today (Saturday) to work, and I wanted to know if they were going to provide bagels for us for free like they did last Saturday. I ate one, but I still ran around before coming in to work to get McDonald's because ... uh, I don't know, I guess I had my heart set on McDonald's and I decided to get an Egg McMuffin and then a bagel. If the bagels come the second time around I figure I would get coffee but just hoard myself on bagels.
When that fucker jumped up and left the room I hesitated for a moment. I wanted to go up there and ask the room supervisor about bagels. But what if he immediately comes back? No, I told myself, he won't come back; he'll be gone for 15 minutes like he always is! Come on, be bold -- do it!!!
And I do it. I get up and walk to the front of the room. AND GODDAMMIT HERE IS THIS ANNOYING, RUDE MOTHERFUCKER COMING BACK INTO THE ROOM NOT TWO SECONDS AFTER LEAVING (what the fuck was he doing getting up so soon after break anyway? Fuckin' weirdo) walking right past me. I couldn't hide my bad goddamn luck or the hideous goddamn timing; I know I violently shook my head and uttered something that people in the front row probably was able to hear before I approached the supervisor with my question. (And BTW, she doesn't thing they're buying bagels this time around. So they're just going to capriciously choose when they want to give bagels and when they don't? What the fuck?!)
As soon as that happened I was cursing myself for making such a stupid decision. I should have just waited until he came back in -- then I would've gotten up to ask her that question. But ... goddammit, why in the hell am I letting this freak dictate what I can do and when I can do it?! Yeah, I guess avoiding him at all costs in order to mitigate any potential of a confrontation is the #1 goal. But I thought that the coast was clear when I went up there, and clearly it wasn't. But then again, who cares if I go up there and he passes by me? I mean, am I not allowed to go up and ask her a question whenever I feel like it? Why can't I go up there and ask her if this prick steps out of the room? Why can't I go up there and ask her if he's sitting (or standing -- he's now decided he can stand up in front of everybody to work -- so distracting) at his computer)? And conversely, what's his deal if I just sit at my computer and not go up to ask her anything if he steps out, or if he's in the room?
I guess I am bewildered by myself for giving this pseudo-bully power over me. I'm not asking for a fight, but altering my day and my behavior isn't right, either, and it leads to expectations that are dashed whenever I made a wrong decision that really shouldn't be categorized that way, you know?
I'm frustrated with myself. But really, all this would go away if he would go away.
Friday, April 28, 2017
Getting Money From Taxes, Really?
Oh, I should talk about my taxes before it's too late.
Still scarred from waiting more than an hour at the downtown Minneapolis post office in order to get the correct postage for my federal and state returns, I think that from that point on I vowed to do my taxes early enough to avoid doing that ever again. (I know I could have also avoided that situation if I file electronically, but ... man, I'm just old-school like that.)
For the past few years it seems as though Tax Day has not fallen on April 15. Because of it falling on a weekend, it had been the following Monday, if I'm not mistaken. On top of that (at least for this year), April 17 was a recognized holiday in the District of Columbia, and because of that, Tax Day 2017 was Tuesday, April 18.
I didn't wait. Well, I kind of did. I knew that my test scoring job would prevent me from even thinking straight after I left work that day, so I planned on getting my taxes in by that weekend. I should have started earlier, but I don't think I even thought about it until about ten days before that weekend.
I felt kind of rusty picking up the 1040 and M1 (and by the way, I don't give a damn if everybody's going online to do their taxes, you need paper copies, and thank you to the Ramsey County Library near Rosedale for at least providing colored 1040's), and I think I made some mistakes at the outset. But since I remembered that I have capital gains distributions to pay every year and I have to fill out that form connected to my Health Savings Account every year and I have to do that special worksheet every year to determine how much I really have to pay instead of looking up my income on the Tax Table, I got back into the groove really quickly. From then on, once I had the numbers I needed and once I verified my math, it seemed to fall into place very easy.
But what I didn't believe, and what I still don't believe, was the result. It was always a bummer for me because I would always pay taxes. Experts say that's actually a good thing. Paying up now essentially means I had the government's money in my account with which I could accrue interest or invest money or gamble on. If I am owed, the government in essence had my money. Well, that was the case (whether you spin it bad or good) this year. Assuming I did this correctly (and again I checked my math) I am to receive $142.25 from the feds and a whopping $16 from the state.
I needed to make absolutely sure if I could explain this. I always right down my wages and the taxes (federal and state) that are withheld in a table in my day planner. I compared this year's with last year's. I did not make as much money in 2016 as I did in 2015, yet the amount withheld in both years was roughly the same. So, for Tax Year 2016 I made less money and was thus owed more money come tax time.
Now, maybe in the long wrong that isn't a good thing. But I do know why people feel great about getting a refund check every year. It's like it's free money, even though it was all yours to begin with. I just wonder if this is going to last. Donald Trump will not give blokes like me a tax cut. I hope to Buddha he isn't the reason I got this windfall of money. Barack Obama did. Trump couldn't have; he's been in office less than 100 days. I'd bet my money, however -- heck, I'd bet my refunds I should be getting this year -- that I'll be back to owing again next year.
Still scarred from waiting more than an hour at the downtown Minneapolis post office in order to get the correct postage for my federal and state returns, I think that from that point on I vowed to do my taxes early enough to avoid doing that ever again. (I know I could have also avoided that situation if I file electronically, but ... man, I'm just old-school like that.)
For the past few years it seems as though Tax Day has not fallen on April 15. Because of it falling on a weekend, it had been the following Monday, if I'm not mistaken. On top of that (at least for this year), April 17 was a recognized holiday in the District of Columbia, and because of that, Tax Day 2017 was Tuesday, April 18.
I didn't wait. Well, I kind of did. I knew that my test scoring job would prevent me from even thinking straight after I left work that day, so I planned on getting my taxes in by that weekend. I should have started earlier, but I don't think I even thought about it until about ten days before that weekend.
I felt kind of rusty picking up the 1040 and M1 (and by the way, I don't give a damn if everybody's going online to do their taxes, you need paper copies, and thank you to the Ramsey County Library near Rosedale for at least providing colored 1040's), and I think I made some mistakes at the outset. But since I remembered that I have capital gains distributions to pay every year and I have to fill out that form connected to my Health Savings Account every year and I have to do that special worksheet every year to determine how much I really have to pay instead of looking up my income on the Tax Table, I got back into the groove really quickly. From then on, once I had the numbers I needed and once I verified my math, it seemed to fall into place very easy.
But what I didn't believe, and what I still don't believe, was the result. It was always a bummer for me because I would always pay taxes. Experts say that's actually a good thing. Paying up now essentially means I had the government's money in my account with which I could accrue interest or invest money or gamble on. If I am owed, the government in essence had my money. Well, that was the case (whether you spin it bad or good) this year. Assuming I did this correctly (and again I checked my math) I am to receive $142.25 from the feds and a whopping $16 from the state.
I needed to make absolutely sure if I could explain this. I always right down my wages and the taxes (federal and state) that are withheld in a table in my day planner. I compared this year's with last year's. I did not make as much money in 2016 as I did in 2015, yet the amount withheld in both years was roughly the same. So, for Tax Year 2016 I made less money and was thus owed more money come tax time.
Now, maybe in the long wrong that isn't a good thing. But I do know why people feel great about getting a refund check every year. It's like it's free money, even though it was all yours to begin with. I just wonder if this is going to last. Donald Trump will not give blokes like me a tax cut. I hope to Buddha he isn't the reason I got this windfall of money. Barack Obama did. Trump couldn't have; he's been in office less than 100 days. I'd bet my money, however -- heck, I'd bet my refunds I should be getting this year -- that I'll be back to owing again next year.
Thursday, April 27, 2017
Oh, And The Other People At Work Pissing Me Off
Sometimes when I see the weirdos who test score like me I feel like I'm right where I belong. I am not necessarily feeling at home, but right where I belong. Big difference.
And sometimes, I feel as if these fucking people are so weird, so rude, so unable to conform to social norms that I need to find other work.
I felt this way (beyond the abnormal fuckheads in my room, which I have detailed in detail in previous blog posts) from the first days I returned to this test scoring place almost eight weeks ago. For some reason, people didn't mind their manners -- not opening the door for me, cutting in front of my path, stuff like that.
But the kicker was when I scooted off my chair and excused myself to go use the little boys' room. I had to go #2, and I wanted as much privacy as possible, so I walked all the way to the far end of the building to use that men's room. As customary so as not to be one of those jerks who check to see if a stall is occupied by just walking up and opening the door, as soon as I open the bathroom door I bend at my waist to see if I can see shoes underneath the stall door. If I do, I swing my arms, say "Drat!" and leave.
I did not see that. So, the coast was clear, right? RIGHT?!?!?!
I open the door and see a fat man squirming on the toilet seat. He's short ... short enough that his feet not only couldn't touch the floor, it didn't go lower than the bottom edge of the stall wall.
I know what you're thinking. He said, "I should have locked the door."
You think?
You can't unsee that, folks.
---
For that reason and so many others, I look forward to this interview I have next week and hope to Buddha that I get this job. More on this later.
Wednesday, April 26, 2017
Addendum To: Person At Work Pissing Me Off, #5: The Really Nice And Cool Guy Sitting Next To Me
Really great guy. Really, really great. But I forgot to add something else that just distracts me from working as well as I could besides the fact that he's so damn fast.
He turns around the mouse so that the buttons are on the bottom, the cord comes out through the bottom, and the buttons are switched. So, even though I have never stared at him working this upside-down mouse (not that I want to, because I have never seen anyone use a computer mouse that way ever), it actually freaks me the fuck out. Why use it that way? Why force your brain to rewire the functions of the mouse, including directions where left is right and up is down, when you can just flip the damn thing to where it's supposed to be?
You know, he's probably such a cool guy that I might ask why he does that. If so, I think I'll blog about it here. But for right now, I'll just go, Ew!
He turns around the mouse so that the buttons are on the bottom, the cord comes out through the bottom, and the buttons are switched. So, even though I have never stared at him working this upside-down mouse (not that I want to, because I have never seen anyone use a computer mouse that way ever), it actually freaks me the fuck out. Why use it that way? Why force your brain to rewire the functions of the mouse, including directions where left is right and up is down, when you can just flip the damn thing to where it's supposed to be?
You know, he's probably such a cool guy that I might ask why he does that. If so, I think I'll blog about it here. But for right now, I'll just go, Ew!
Tuesday, April 25, 2017
He's Leaving! He's Leaving! ... Wait, Is He Leaving?
OK, so this asshole at work I've been avoiding ever since Thursday. He hasn't done anything overtly towards me -- passive-aggressive, maybe; once at the end of a break he went sauntering around where my car was smoking a cigarette -- but I have nonetheless decided that, to make sure I'm holding up my end of my accusations to my supervisors (who probably think I'm crazy and, like I feared, have decided that I am the one who needs monitoring) by making sure I don't cross paths with him at all costs. It has gotten so bad that I make sure that I get up only after he sits down. No reading through the sports section in the break room, no extended shit breaks (though I had to try and squeeze one out yesterday morning) ... just make sure I don't see him besides in the room. It actually makes me more focused and productive. I hate that.
On Monday, he was doing his usual flittering about, charming his supervisor. But this time the room boss came over to talk to him. This was nothing about what he did to me. It wasn't really angry either, unfortunately. But later that morning, during her briefing, the room boss reiterated that if we were to leave this project earlier than the projected drop dead date, which is the end of next week, to tell our supervisors immediately.
Was what I saw related to that announcement? It had to be related! If that's the case, that means that this guy will be out of my sight, and out of my life, forever! (Well, until next season, anyway.) No more avoiding! More time reading the paper and trying to dook!!!
And so, as I held my piss in, I was counting the hours until 4:30 Monday (which is when I decided I was going to leave for my night scoring job; it's just too weird and too uncomfortable for me to leave the same time as he does) and privately wishing that I'll never see him again. But Tuesday he was back. And at this point I have to wonder if my wish was really pie-in-the-sky, and that there's no fucking way he's leaving until the end of the project.
Damn.
He'll be there in the morning. And Thursday, and Friday, and Saturday, although I might skip that just to avoid his ass face. Man, I hate it when I allow myself to believe good news.
Monday, April 24, 2017
Addendum To: So I Was Passed Over
So I began my stint at the other test scoring place in the evening. It's at the Megamall, where Bloomingdale's used to be. It's kind of eerie to see what was once an anchor mall ripped down to the studs and being turned into a warehouse.
Things were chill. I was sent to my department in the back, where there was some leadership telling me what to do. However, since this is such a massive project (necessitating a huge place like an anchor mall) with, frankly, apparently such slipshod organization, we are now being self-directed. Instead of our room boss training us verbally, we are told to put on our headphones and follow along with recordings.
Maybe in exchange for this "new" way of doing things, other fundamental requirements for these test scoring projects, such as minimum hours and telling people when you're going to be late, don't seem to apply. If we're being self-directed, we're also allowed to take breaks whenever we would like to. In fact, we can take as long of a lunch break as we want. We have to note our time electronically, but there is no set time we break. I consider it a compromise brought about by the uniqueness of this project.
I hope this "new" way of doing things isn't going to be the way things are going to be done from here on out. But then again, I don't know if I care. I see the leadership for each of the dozens of groups working here. I remarked here on WAF that I think not being given a supervisory position for this project was for the best. But as soon as I sat down I realized that one of the supervisors was that passive-aggressive dickhead from last year who wowed everyone by cutting a melon into a swan. That asshole didn't hold open the door for me, and he gets promoted and not me?!
In the meantime, I was helped along (whenever I didn't help myself -- again, I'm basically training myself through the recordings) by a couple other supervisors. Again, I don't doubt their legitimacy. So long as they were trained before we drones came in today, I will totally rely on their expertise on the question I'll be working on the next three weeks without reservation. But I have to tell you, I swear -- I swear! -- that they started at this place after me. Years after me, probably. And nominally, they're my bosses right now. I thought I would be OK with it. I'm sorry; I realize that I am not. I am not jealous. I just don't think that it's right.
You see, I have heard that there needs to be 1,000 test scorers for this project. That means that, roughly, there needs to be 100 supervisors. Totally massive undertaking. But they're saying that even though I've been with this company for eight years and did supervise (and apparently I did a good enough job), I'm not good enough to snag one of one hundred slots?! Really?!?! Have I fallen that out of favor with these guys ... have I been that slow ... have I taken that many breaks?!?!?!
See, these are the moments I think I should go back to school. How do I go through the indignity of being told what to do by whippersnappers who started working there last year? Why put myself through that?
Oh yeah -- the money. And this is why I should go back to school.
Things were chill. I was sent to my department in the back, where there was some leadership telling me what to do. However, since this is such a massive project (necessitating a huge place like an anchor mall) with, frankly, apparently such slipshod organization, we are now being self-directed. Instead of our room boss training us verbally, we are told to put on our headphones and follow along with recordings.
Maybe in exchange for this "new" way of doing things, other fundamental requirements for these test scoring projects, such as minimum hours and telling people when you're going to be late, don't seem to apply. If we're being self-directed, we're also allowed to take breaks whenever we would like to. In fact, we can take as long of a lunch break as we want. We have to note our time electronically, but there is no set time we break. I consider it a compromise brought about by the uniqueness of this project.
I hope this "new" way of doing things isn't going to be the way things are going to be done from here on out. But then again, I don't know if I care. I see the leadership for each of the dozens of groups working here. I remarked here on WAF that I think not being given a supervisory position for this project was for the best. But as soon as I sat down I realized that one of the supervisors was that passive-aggressive dickhead from last year who wowed everyone by cutting a melon into a swan. That asshole didn't hold open the door for me, and he gets promoted and not me?!
In the meantime, I was helped along (whenever I didn't help myself -- again, I'm basically training myself through the recordings) by a couple other supervisors. Again, I don't doubt their legitimacy. So long as they were trained before we drones came in today, I will totally rely on their expertise on the question I'll be working on the next three weeks without reservation. But I have to tell you, I swear -- I swear! -- that they started at this place after me. Years after me, probably. And nominally, they're my bosses right now. I thought I would be OK with it. I'm sorry; I realize that I am not. I am not jealous. I just don't think that it's right.
You see, I have heard that there needs to be 1,000 test scorers for this project. That means that, roughly, there needs to be 100 supervisors. Totally massive undertaking. But they're saying that even though I've been with this company for eight years and did supervise (and apparently I did a good enough job), I'm not good enough to snag one of one hundred slots?! Really?!?! Have I fallen that out of favor with these guys ... have I been that slow ... have I taken that many breaks?!?!?!
See, these are the moments I think I should go back to school. How do I go through the indignity of being told what to do by whippersnappers who started working there last year? Why put myself through that?
Oh yeah -- the money. And this is why I should go back to school.
Sunday, April 23, 2017
The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey
Positive Numbers: Gopher softball (Last Week: 0). After Mercy-Ruling Northwestern Sunday, 8-0 in five innings, they rose in the national pools to #5. That is the highest rank the University of Minnesota softball program has ever reached. And they have responded with four more victories compared to no losses. The club won in so many different ways. They Mercy-Ruled fellow Big Ten schools Wisconsin (the first game of a road doubleheader sweep) and Iowa at the minimum of five innings, blanked the Hawkeyes 5-0 in the Friday night game, and finally broke through with six runs in the 12th inning of what was a scoreless game. I said last week that the season isn't that daunting, but that new all-time-highest ranking still fucking impressive, so they can get Positive Numbers from me.
This screening week will begin to wrap up the last eight games of the home portion of the Gophers' sched for the year. After playing Iowa today (Sunday) at Cowles Stadium, they host a doubleheader vs. North Dakota St. Wednesday, then begin a three-game series against Purdue.
#-1: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -1). Normally when the best team of the week is pushed up past -1 to 0 or even Positives, the rest of the survey moves up with them. I couldn't do that in this case because, frankly, they don't deserve it. The Gophs lost a series for the first time all calendar year by getting blanked Sunday afternoon to Indiana, 4-0. A 5-2 victory over South Dakota St. at Siebert was followed by a 5-3 loss at home to NebraskaSunday Friday before the results were literally reversed Saturday against those same Blackshirts. A choppy 2-2 week -- the first choppy week in U. baseball's year -- means that I can't, in good conscience, give these guys #0. They were projected to be in the NCAA Tournament as of Wednesday, but a .500 week could change all that. Maybe they can change their fortunes back to the positive; this week they host the rubber match of the series vs. Nebraska, take a quick trip to DeKalb, Ill., to play Northern Illinois, then go back to Siebert for the first three of five games against Illinois.
#-2: Twins (Last Week: -2). After a promising start, the Twinks have in the past two weeks been what everybody in Baseball Nation thought they were. Friday's 6-3 doubling up of the Detroit Tigers (whose starting Pitching, of all people, was Justin Verlander, whom the Twins chased in the sixth) was the only thing preventing this organization from suffering the indignity of a winless week. (The 5-4 loss to Detroit yesterday/Sunday aftrernoon came at around the same time the Mild were lazing it across the river -- man, Friday was such a shit day for Twin Cities sports.) Anyway, the midweek sweep by Cleveland (at home, by the way) shows just how far the Twins have in order to be a contender. And, for the record, the Twinks have slipped below .500 with a record of 8-9.
Before the season began, there were some rumblings about a move made by Twins Chief Baseball Officer Derek Falvey (who came over from, you guessed it, Cleveland). Byung Ho Park was optioned to AAA Rochester. In his place, Falvey decided to give Park's spot to a Pitcher, bringing the big league roster to 13 Pitchers, 12 batters/fielders. Most teams usually don't do that. The speculation centered on whether Falvey did it because he thought he had superior pitching or had far inferior pitching.
Well, with Adalberto Mejia stinking it up in yesterday's (Saturday's) 5-4 loss and getting rightly demoted, it appears as though keeping more Pitchers than batsmen is over. With the arms being relative good (and miles better than they were in 2016), a hitter will come up and take Mejia's place. Maybe it'll be Park himself?
After playing this (Sunday) afternoon's rubber match against Detroit, they will hit the road for an extended period of time. They have three at The Bastard Washington Senators (v.2.0) starting on Monday, then spend the weekend in Kansas City.
#-Infinity: Wild (Last Week: -4). Oh, fuck you, Mild.
I have no idea what to say. Game 5, at home, the day after Prince died (although who cares, really, because even though I have found out [later than most] that he was a sports fan, we have no idea if he was a hockey fan) -- this was the one where that fucking team was supposed to tear through the St. Louis Blues like, 5-0, and where very early on in the game Head Coach (and cuckolded former Wild Head Coach) Mike Yeo would sit down Goalie Jake Allen and basically retreat and hunker down for Game 6 Monday at the Loo. That was the blueprint. Instead, the Blues were able to outlast the fucking Wild yesterday (Saturday) afternoon, 4-3 in Overtime, to humiliate the squad in five games.
The Minnesota Wild was once on pace to have the best record in the Western Conference and the second-best record in the National Hockey League. The team set a franchise record for wins and points. They set a franchise record by winning a dozen games in a row. (Do you remember that clash New Year's Eve when the host Wild lost to Columbus? The Blue Jackets snapped the Mild's winning streak while extending theirs to 15 games. They lost in the first round to Pittsburgh, by the by.) But after a late-season swoon, they were ushered out, quickly but quietly, but a traditionally underperforming franchise whose Head Coach, praised during the series for implementing a stifling defense even though that same D did dick for the Mild, must be masturbating in his bed for exacting revenge on the players who quit on him.
Oh, Mild, Mild. I don't care about the "we ran into a hot Goalie" excuse. And yes, the Chicago Blackhawks are also out of the playoffs by Nashville, and they were embarrassed much more so than the Wild -- Chicago was swept, and they didn't even score a goal in their two games at United Center. Along with Montreal, Minnesota is another team who had the home-ice advantage and are already eliminated. But saying that this is hockey and upsets happen all the time (and they do -- Chicago and Montreal won their divisions, so half of the division champions went one-and-done) is a CYA excuse for the fact that this team has yet again underachieved.
These quick exits are getting to be tiresome, and worrisome. This is fucking Groundhog Day all over again, where the team goes through lulls in offense and get knocked out early in the Stanley Cup playoffs. The team and its cuckolded fans are giving their excuses -- Devan Dubnyk just wore down (he was pushing Carey Price as The Beast Goaltender In The NHL until he swooned just like the rest of the squad), we just needed to finish, Ryan Suter is wearing down, Eric Staal got hurt, Jason Pominville disappeared and, yes, "We ran into a hot Goalie." Unac-fucking-ceptable. These guys have underwhelmed so consistently that I have come to the conclusion that this organization, as it is currently constituted, simply cannot win a Cup.
So blow it up. Fuck it. Fuck it all. Trade all the veterans. Trade away a few of your prospects, too. A controlled brush fire that will level the entire franchise till all that's left are snot-nosed rookies from college and Canadian juniors. Reach down deep into AAA Iowa, because General Manager Chuck Fletcher (or his replacement -- I'm coming to the conclusion that the GM needs to change, too) needs to remove the poison of underachievement that is plaguing this team now. I don't know how you do that without sucking for a few years and picking up that transcendent player (a Sidney Crosby, an Auston Matthews) you can build a team around. But Fletch's current state of trying to let loose role players while keeping the core intact and their best young'uns in their organization simply isn't working. It's time for drastic change, because this bullshit may be the turning point in fan relations ... as it should be.
This screening week will begin to wrap up the last eight games of the home portion of the Gophers' sched for the year. After playing Iowa today (Sunday) at Cowles Stadium, they host a doubleheader vs. North Dakota St. Wednesday, then begin a three-game series against Purdue.
#-1: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -1). Normally when the best team of the week is pushed up past -1 to 0 or even Positives, the rest of the survey moves up with them. I couldn't do that in this case because, frankly, they don't deserve it. The Gophs lost a series for the first time all calendar year by getting blanked Sunday afternoon to Indiana, 4-0. A 5-2 victory over South Dakota St. at Siebert was followed by a 5-3 loss at home to Nebraska
#-2: Twins (Last Week: -2). After a promising start, the Twinks have in the past two weeks been what everybody in Baseball Nation thought they were. Friday's 6-3 doubling up of the Detroit Tigers (whose starting Pitching, of all people, was Justin Verlander, whom the Twins chased in the sixth) was the only thing preventing this organization from suffering the indignity of a winless week. (The 5-4 loss to Detroit yesterday/Sunday aftrernoon came at around the same time the Mild were lazing it across the river -- man, Friday was such a shit day for Twin Cities sports.) Anyway, the midweek sweep by Cleveland (at home, by the way) shows just how far the Twins have in order to be a contender. And, for the record, the Twinks have slipped below .500 with a record of 8-9.
Before the season began, there were some rumblings about a move made by Twins Chief Baseball Officer Derek Falvey (who came over from, you guessed it, Cleveland). Byung Ho Park was optioned to AAA Rochester. In his place, Falvey decided to give Park's spot to a Pitcher, bringing the big league roster to 13 Pitchers, 12 batters/fielders. Most teams usually don't do that. The speculation centered on whether Falvey did it because he thought he had superior pitching or had far inferior pitching.
Well, with Adalberto Mejia stinking it up in yesterday's (Saturday's) 5-4 loss and getting rightly demoted, it appears as though keeping more Pitchers than batsmen is over. With the arms being relative good (and miles better than they were in 2016), a hitter will come up and take Mejia's place. Maybe it'll be Park himself?
After playing this (Sunday) afternoon's rubber match against Detroit, they will hit the road for an extended period of time. They have three at The Bastard Washington Senators (v.2.0) starting on Monday, then spend the weekend in Kansas City.
#-Infinity: Wild (Last Week: -4). Oh, fuck you, Mild.
I have no idea what to say. Game 5, at home, the day after Prince died (although who cares, really, because even though I have found out [later than most] that he was a sports fan, we have no idea if he was a hockey fan) -- this was the one where that fucking team was supposed to tear through the St. Louis Blues like, 5-0, and where very early on in the game Head Coach (and cuckolded former Wild Head Coach) Mike Yeo would sit down Goalie Jake Allen and basically retreat and hunker down for Game 6 Monday at the Loo. That was the blueprint. Instead, the Blues were able to outlast the fucking Wild yesterday (Saturday) afternoon, 4-3 in Overtime, to humiliate the squad in five games.
The Minnesota Wild was once on pace to have the best record in the Western Conference and the second-best record in the National Hockey League. The team set a franchise record for wins and points. They set a franchise record by winning a dozen games in a row. (Do you remember that clash New Year's Eve when the host Wild lost to Columbus? The Blue Jackets snapped the Mild's winning streak while extending theirs to 15 games. They lost in the first round to Pittsburgh, by the by.) But after a late-season swoon, they were ushered out, quickly but quietly, but a traditionally underperforming franchise whose Head Coach, praised during the series for implementing a stifling defense even though that same D did dick for the Mild, must be masturbating in his bed for exacting revenge on the players who quit on him.
Oh, Mild, Mild. I don't care about the "we ran into a hot Goalie" excuse. And yes, the Chicago Blackhawks are also out of the playoffs by Nashville, and they were embarrassed much more so than the Wild -- Chicago was swept, and they didn't even score a goal in their two games at United Center. Along with Montreal, Minnesota is another team who had the home-ice advantage and are already eliminated. But saying that this is hockey and upsets happen all the time (and they do -- Chicago and Montreal won their divisions, so half of the division champions went one-and-done) is a CYA excuse for the fact that this team has yet again underachieved.
These quick exits are getting to be tiresome, and worrisome. This is fucking Groundhog Day all over again, where the team goes through lulls in offense and get knocked out early in the Stanley Cup playoffs. The team and its cuckolded fans are giving their excuses -- Devan Dubnyk just wore down (he was pushing Carey Price as The Beast Goaltender In The NHL until he swooned just like the rest of the squad), we just needed to finish, Ryan Suter is wearing down, Eric Staal got hurt, Jason Pominville disappeared and, yes, "We ran into a hot Goalie." Unac-fucking-ceptable. These guys have underwhelmed so consistently that I have come to the conclusion that this organization, as it is currently constituted, simply cannot win a Cup.
So blow it up. Fuck it. Fuck it all. Trade all the veterans. Trade away a few of your prospects, too. A controlled brush fire that will level the entire franchise till all that's left are snot-nosed rookies from college and Canadian juniors. Reach down deep into AAA Iowa, because General Manager Chuck Fletcher (or his replacement -- I'm coming to the conclusion that the GM needs to change, too) needs to remove the poison of underachievement that is plaguing this team now. I don't know how you do that without sucking for a few years and picking up that transcendent player (a Sidney Crosby, an Auston Matthews) you can build a team around. But Fletch's current state of trying to let loose role players while keeping the core intact and their best young'uns in their organization simply isn't working. It's time for drastic change, because this bullshit may be the turning point in fan relations ... as it should be.
Saturday, April 22, 2017
Phew, Didn't See Him Yesterday ... Am I Overreacting?
I was girding myself for a potential fistfight -- and preying to Buddha and God and all the deities above that this guy wouldn't bring a gun -- with ... oh, I won't mention him by name anymore. I didn't have to worry, though, at least yesterday (Friday); he didn't show up. He has taken many days off for the project. I thought that was illegal.
And since I did not see him last Saturday, I will hope (cross fingers) that he won't show up for work today. That means I'll have back-to-back days where he won't "accidentally" run into me or some bullshit. Now, he'll sure as hell be back Monday, at which case I'll have two, maybe three, weeks in which I'll do my best to avoid his punk ass.
Saying that ... well, I wonder if I ... may have taken his action in the way it wasn't intended. Is it possible that he thought that no one was behind me, therefore he thought he should shut the security door? Or maybe he just otherwise didn't intend to slam the door behind me because, well, he's weird? And about him yelling at me a couple weeks ago when I had my earplugs in and therefore couldn't make out what he really was saying; maybe he was trying to make a joke with me?
Is it possible, maybe, that I could in fact be overreacting to this? If so, well ... first of all, this guy may in fact be afraid of me, and therefore will try and avoid me for the rest of the project. That would be great; I don't need to make more friends here. Also, maybe my supervisors' (both of them) course of action of just monitoring and telling me to tell them the next time something happens from him is the right thing to do -- assuming, of course, they haven't told him yet. If they did, all hell might break loose.
However ... if nothing else comes from this, I am starting to wonder if this was, in fact, a mistake. I mean, how would this look from my end if nothing even close to passive-aggressive comes from this guy for the rest of the project? How would I look in that case? Probably like a screaming ninny who has to run to Daddy and Mommy every time something bad happens to him. Or, worse, a liar. They probably spoke to each other and like, "What the fuck is he talking about?" That's always how it turns out, doesn't it? You think some asshole is crazy enough that you report him to authorities, and it turns out that the only person the authorities will report on ... is you, the person who complains.
You know, maybe I did overreact.
Nah. Bullshit. He knew what he was doing.
Or did he? Do I know what I'm doing?
Did I do the wrong thing?
You know, after complaining about suddenly deputized immediate supervisors, maybe this is Strike 2. Which means that, maybe, I should go back to school. You know, just in case.
And since I did not see him last Saturday, I will hope (cross fingers) that he won't show up for work today. That means I'll have back-to-back days where he won't "accidentally" run into me or some bullshit. Now, he'll sure as hell be back Monday, at which case I'll have two, maybe three, weeks in which I'll do my best to avoid his punk ass.
Saying that ... well, I wonder if I ... may have taken his action in the way it wasn't intended. Is it possible that he thought that no one was behind me, therefore he thought he should shut the security door? Or maybe he just otherwise didn't intend to slam the door behind me because, well, he's weird? And about him yelling at me a couple weeks ago when I had my earplugs in and therefore couldn't make out what he really was saying; maybe he was trying to make a joke with me?
Is it possible, maybe, that I could in fact be overreacting to this? If so, well ... first of all, this guy may in fact be afraid of me, and therefore will try and avoid me for the rest of the project. That would be great; I don't need to make more friends here. Also, maybe my supervisors' (both of them) course of action of just monitoring and telling me to tell them the next time something happens from him is the right thing to do -- assuming, of course, they haven't told him yet. If they did, all hell might break loose.
However ... if nothing else comes from this, I am starting to wonder if this was, in fact, a mistake. I mean, how would this look from my end if nothing even close to passive-aggressive comes from this guy for the rest of the project? How would I look in that case? Probably like a screaming ninny who has to run to Daddy and Mommy every time something bad happens to him. Or, worse, a liar. They probably spoke to each other and like, "What the fuck is he talking about?" That's always how it turns out, doesn't it? You think some asshole is crazy enough that you report him to authorities, and it turns out that the only person the authorities will report on ... is you, the person who complains.
You know, maybe I did overreact.
Nah. Bullshit. He knew what he was doing.
Or did he? Do I know what I'm doing?
Did I do the wrong thing?
You know, after complaining about suddenly deputized immediate supervisors, maybe this is Strike 2. Which means that, maybe, I should go back to school. You know, just in case.
Friday, April 21, 2017
You Motherfucker, I Hate You
Wow. This asshole at the test scoring place pulled the most passive-aggressive thing ever done to me.
So yesterday, after lunch, I'm coming in. In the lobby is this prick, the #4 Guy At Work. I'm on my way to get through the security door, but he turns around in such a way that I let him queue ahead of me.
Normally, at least in Minnesota, if a stranger is going through a door before you, that stranger would hold the door open for you, and in return, you would say, "Thank you." That's usually the case here. There are a lot of weird people here, however, and there are some who don't open the door for you. Maybe they're in the middle of a conversation with someone or they're just being dicks, but it happens.
No. This fucking asshole actually tried to close the door on me. He reached out behind me, grabbed the side of the door and tried to close it. How rude! It was a half-ass gesture; I grabbed it before it completely closed it. But I knew what he was trying to do to me. Showing me up for taking too many breaks -- like that's his fucking business -- wasn't enough to get his message across?
I had to come back at him. As I passed by I told him, "Watch it, buddy." He turned around -- "What did I do?" "If I have to tell you, I can't help you," I replied, and I went to my seat. Enough of a comeback I can concoct at the time. Still need to be sharper, quicker.
Still, that passive-aggressive shot pissed me off. I had that first run-in with him a couple weeks ago. He can play dumb all he likes, but I figured he was bullshitting me. So at that point I didn't care what the consequences are or if I was overreacting. I wasn't going to be bullied and threatened by some young punk-ass who's in the same room as I. So I told on him to my immediate supervisor.
I will say that I trust him enough to believe he listened. And (I wish I could go on but I've been on the phone with my sister trying to buy these products from IKEA) after talking with the room supervisor, it appears as though they're going to take a wait-and-see approach. A part of me is upset that they're not taking this more seriously, but I am afraid to admit that I feel this is best because anything more and this asshole will know I ratted him out to them. Hell, he might already know, in which case he'll come to work tomorrow to either key my car car ... or shoot me.
So just in case ... asshole's name is Trent and he drives a yellow Cruze, Minnesota license plate 360 MJV.
Best not to come after me ever again, motherfucker.
So yesterday, after lunch, I'm coming in. In the lobby is this prick, the #4 Guy At Work. I'm on my way to get through the security door, but he turns around in such a way that I let him queue ahead of me.
Normally, at least in Minnesota, if a stranger is going through a door before you, that stranger would hold the door open for you, and in return, you would say, "Thank you." That's usually the case here. There are a lot of weird people here, however, and there are some who don't open the door for you. Maybe they're in the middle of a conversation with someone or they're just being dicks, but it happens.
No. This fucking asshole actually tried to close the door on me. He reached out behind me, grabbed the side of the door and tried to close it. How rude! It was a half-ass gesture; I grabbed it before it completely closed it. But I knew what he was trying to do to me. Showing me up for taking too many breaks -- like that's his fucking business -- wasn't enough to get his message across?
I had to come back at him. As I passed by I told him, "Watch it, buddy." He turned around -- "What did I do?" "If I have to tell you, I can't help you," I replied, and I went to my seat. Enough of a comeback I can concoct at the time. Still need to be sharper, quicker.
Still, that passive-aggressive shot pissed me off. I had that first run-in with him a couple weeks ago. He can play dumb all he likes, but I figured he was bullshitting me. So at that point I didn't care what the consequences are or if I was overreacting. I wasn't going to be bullied and threatened by some young punk-ass who's in the same room as I. So I told on him to my immediate supervisor.
I will say that I trust him enough to believe he listened. And (I wish I could go on but I've been on the phone with my sister trying to buy these products from IKEA) after talking with the room supervisor, it appears as though they're going to take a wait-and-see approach. A part of me is upset that they're not taking this more seriously, but I am afraid to admit that I feel this is best because anything more and this asshole will know I ratted him out to them. Hell, he might already know, in which case he'll come to work tomorrow to either key my car car ... or shoot me.
So just in case ... asshole's name is Trent and he drives a yellow Cruze, Minnesota license plate 360 MJV.
Best not to come after me ever again, motherfucker.
Thursday, April 20, 2017
Poor Bastard Of The Moment (Which, Actually, Was Almost Two Months Ago): Claudio Ranieri (Scheduled Post)
He is the Manager who guided Leicester City, a small English Premier League club that had and was thought to permanently be fighting to stay in the top-flight EPL, to the 38-game regular season championship last year. It may be The Greatest Upset In The History Of Recorded Sport, maybe even bigger than the Miracle On Ice, because the Foxes had to prove their worthiness game after game, and not just in some one-off playoff. It was, simply, brilliant, and a reminder that, truly, Anything Can Happen.
And then Leicester was what people thought they were this year. They were so bad that they were just one point above relegation, and being relegated as defending champs would have been humiliating, if not unprecedented. Ranieri tried to preach patience, but the Foxes faithful and ownership, believing that one historic title meant that they could ask, "But what you have you done for me lately?" finally did what I think is unbelievable: They fired Ranieri on February 23, about nine months after guiding them to The Promised Land.
This bullshit happens all the time in the EPL. For example, Chelsea, the year after winning the EPL in 2015, sacked their Manager, Jose Mourinho, but that was a bit more justified because he went batshit crazy that year. Plus, it's Chelsea, a powerhouse club which is expected to win championships. They can grind through Managers like it's a sausage maker because they have enough players and money to compete regardless of who's in the technical area.
But this is Leicester City, where the ultimate glory isn't expected and probably will never be seen again. I don't care if the Foxes were relegated all the way down The Pyramid to Level 22; if Claudio Ranieri was in charge when the side accomplished the impossible, he gets to stay in charge for as long as he damn well pleases. He can be demented, in a chair, relegated to eating pureed peas and shitting twice an hour -- he gets to stay as Manager! And if the players suddenly turned their backs on the man who gave them a title no one saw coming, which is what I think happened here, fire the players, not the Manager.
Unfortunately, what I still think was a rash decision has paid off handsomely. Interim Manager Craig Shakespeare guided this team to five straight EPL wins and the Quarterfinals of the Champions League before getting eliminated. As of press time they're in twelfth place -- no chance to repeat as EPL champs (that should go to Chelsea), but ensuring another year in top-flight with each passing Matchday.
After Leicester City cemented the EPL title last year I went to their website to see if I could purchase their jersey. I so wanted to be a part of that history. They were sold out. Now, I don't give a damn about them. A Manager does something that'll never be seen again, and this is the goddamn thanks he gets?!
Poor Bastard.
And then Leicester was what people thought they were this year. They were so bad that they were just one point above relegation, and being relegated as defending champs would have been humiliating, if not unprecedented. Ranieri tried to preach patience, but the Foxes faithful and ownership, believing that one historic title meant that they could ask, "But what you have you done for me lately?" finally did what I think is unbelievable: They fired Ranieri on February 23, about nine months after guiding them to The Promised Land.
This bullshit happens all the time in the EPL. For example, Chelsea, the year after winning the EPL in 2015, sacked their Manager, Jose Mourinho, but that was a bit more justified because he went batshit crazy that year. Plus, it's Chelsea, a powerhouse club which is expected to win championships. They can grind through Managers like it's a sausage maker because they have enough players and money to compete regardless of who's in the technical area.
But this is Leicester City, where the ultimate glory isn't expected and probably will never be seen again. I don't care if the Foxes were relegated all the way down The Pyramid to Level 22; if Claudio Ranieri was in charge when the side accomplished the impossible, he gets to stay in charge for as long as he damn well pleases. He can be demented, in a chair, relegated to eating pureed peas and shitting twice an hour -- he gets to stay as Manager! And if the players suddenly turned their backs on the man who gave them a title no one saw coming, which is what I think happened here, fire the players, not the Manager.
Unfortunately, what I still think was a rash decision has paid off handsomely. Interim Manager Craig Shakespeare guided this team to five straight EPL wins and the Quarterfinals of the Champions League before getting eliminated. As of press time they're in twelfth place -- no chance to repeat as EPL champs (that should go to Chelsea), but ensuring another year in top-flight with each passing Matchday.
After Leicester City cemented the EPL title last year I went to their website to see if I could purchase their jersey. I so wanted to be a part of that history. They were sold out. Now, I don't give a damn about them. A Manager does something that'll never be seen again, and this is the goddamn thanks he gets?!
Poor Bastard.
Wednesday, April 19, 2017
Person At Work Pissing Me Off, #5: The Really Nice And Cool Guy Sitting Next To Me
I really, really hate to talk about this, because on the whole he's a really good person. We talk a lot. We commiserate a lot over the crappy papers we sometimes run across. And he has apologized profusely over the times he has coughed and sneezed. It's just that there are so many people that have weirded me out and infuriated me to no end, and, well, I might as well get this off my chest.
Unfortunately, his work rate (not him, and I want to emphasize that) bothers me a lot. I am easily distracted when I see the constant clicking and dimming that indicates a scorer has submitted his or her score for the essay that he or she looked over and is waiting for the next one to load. I have trouble ignoring the computer screens of the people who sit in the row in front of me; once I see one of theirs go dark for a second, I can't help but divert my attention to it, and I thus lose my place in the answer I'm working on.
It is just as worse, if not moreso, with my co-worker friend because he sits in the computer next to me. My peripheral vision catches all the papers he's going through, and he goes through a lot of them. He's fast. Really fast. Too fast, actually; he's doing so much that he truly is running us out of a job. And that further feeds my distraction; not only can I not help but turn my head and see him go through yet another essay while I'm stuck re-reading mine a second (or third or fourth) time, I notice that he's just whipping through them. That's reflected in the numbers we get about our production after lunch. And the gap between how many he's reading vs. how many I'm reading demoralizes me even more, to the point where sometimes I work even slower.
To block out his pace, and to a lesser extent those of the people in front of me, I now wear hooded sweatshirts. Whenever I feel like I'm looking more at their screens than mine, I flip the hood on, cover as much of the periphery as I can, and focus. It helps to a certain extent, although thinking about sex or getting thrown out of the house can make me space out for minutes at a time. I don't know how bad I would be, day after day, if I didn't wear a hoodie.
It would be better, to be honest, if he scooted down one seat. Our immediate supervisor was at the end of our four-chair row, but he actually moved to another room because he's starting on another project. If my co-worker friend moved one computer to the right, we both would have space next to us so we could spread out and evaluate without being bothered by a person next to us. That would be a win-win, no?
Unfortunately, his work rate (not him, and I want to emphasize that) bothers me a lot. I am easily distracted when I see the constant clicking and dimming that indicates a scorer has submitted his or her score for the essay that he or she looked over and is waiting for the next one to load. I have trouble ignoring the computer screens of the people who sit in the row in front of me; once I see one of theirs go dark for a second, I can't help but divert my attention to it, and I thus lose my place in the answer I'm working on.
It is just as worse, if not moreso, with my co-worker friend because he sits in the computer next to me. My peripheral vision catches all the papers he's going through, and he goes through a lot of them. He's fast. Really fast. Too fast, actually; he's doing so much that he truly is running us out of a job. And that further feeds my distraction; not only can I not help but turn my head and see him go through yet another essay while I'm stuck re-reading mine a second (or third or fourth) time, I notice that he's just whipping through them. That's reflected in the numbers we get about our production after lunch. And the gap between how many he's reading vs. how many I'm reading demoralizes me even more, to the point where sometimes I work even slower.
To block out his pace, and to a lesser extent those of the people in front of me, I now wear hooded sweatshirts. Whenever I feel like I'm looking more at their screens than mine, I flip the hood on, cover as much of the periphery as I can, and focus. It helps to a certain extent, although thinking about sex or getting thrown out of the house can make me space out for minutes at a time. I don't know how bad I would be, day after day, if I didn't wear a hoodie.
It would be better, to be honest, if he scooted down one seat. Our immediate supervisor was at the end of our four-chair row, but he actually moved to another room because he's starting on another project. If my co-worker friend moved one computer to the right, we both would have space next to us so we could spread out and evaluate without being bothered by a person next to us. That would be a win-win, no?
Tuesday, April 18, 2017
In My Accuser, I Saw What I Aspire To
So yesterday (Monday) afternoon I am in the break room getting my third and final cup of coffee. I was just done using one of my two giant bottles of creamer and was going to the fridge to put it back when this fellow test scorer, someone I have seen and worked before, grabs the creamer out of my hand, rudely.
So I look at him, maybe with a mixture of incredulity and menace (I hope), at which point he might have said (because I had my earplugs in), "Oh, is this yours?" I don't know if I said it was, but then he totally changed his tune, to a more accommodating one. "This looks like mine," he may have said, and then he gave back my creamer and went to another refrigerator, at which point he pulled out a similarly-sized bottle of creamer which had a similar shade of brown on it.
"Did you think I stole your creamer from you?" I had to ask after apparently he figured everything out, to which he replied, in a brusque and (hopefully) chastised tone, "We're good. No worries." And I left because I don't need to make any more enemies that I already have.
Two things. The first probably is the more obvious one. So he looked at me and my creamer, figured that it must have been his creamer, then promptly yanked it away from me to take back what he thought was his. Only after that did he check to see that his creamer was still there. Therefore -- why in the fuckety-fuck did he not make sure that he didn't still have his bottles of creamer in the fridge before deciding I stole one?
The second ... well, maybe I'm being too generous here, or paranoid, but I think it's the thing that terrifies me more. If our places were switched ... I could see myself totally doing the same thing he did. I don't even know if I would have a clear enough head to check my fridge before going off on him. I've had things stolen from the fridge there from time to time. And I'm guessing that he has, too, and he was sick of getting his shit taken away from him and/or used without his permission when he saw me and thought he caught me red-handed. Sure, I could have gone off on him for accusing me of something I didn't do, especially when it was so easy to prove that I didn't do it. But for a moment there, when he stole my creamer from me, I saw, reflected back to me, what I have always wanted to do to the goddamn thief who stole my Pepsi last year.
So I look at him, maybe with a mixture of incredulity and menace (I hope), at which point he might have said (because I had my earplugs in), "Oh, is this yours?" I don't know if I said it was, but then he totally changed his tune, to a more accommodating one. "This looks like mine," he may have said, and then he gave back my creamer and went to another refrigerator, at which point he pulled out a similarly-sized bottle of creamer which had a similar shade of brown on it.
"Did you think I stole your creamer from you?" I had to ask after apparently he figured everything out, to which he replied, in a brusque and (hopefully) chastised tone, "We're good. No worries." And I left because I don't need to make any more enemies that I already have.
Two things. The first probably is the more obvious one. So he looked at me and my creamer, figured that it must have been his creamer, then promptly yanked it away from me to take back what he thought was his. Only after that did he check to see that his creamer was still there. Therefore -- why in the fuckety-fuck did he not make sure that he didn't still have his bottles of creamer in the fridge before deciding I stole one?
The second ... well, maybe I'm being too generous here, or paranoid, but I think it's the thing that terrifies me more. If our places were switched ... I could see myself totally doing the same thing he did. I don't even know if I would have a clear enough head to check my fridge before going off on him. I've had things stolen from the fridge there from time to time. And I'm guessing that he has, too, and he was sick of getting his shit taken away from him and/or used without his permission when he saw me and thought he caught me red-handed. Sure, I could have gone off on him for accusing me of something I didn't do, especially when it was so easy to prove that I didn't do it. But for a moment there, when he stole my creamer from me, I saw, reflected back to me, what I have always wanted to do to the goddamn thief who stole my Pepsi last year.
Monday, April 17, 2017
So I Was Passed Over
So several weeks ago, when I started my first assignment at the test scoring place, I ran into someone I sat next to at a scoring project. She's really nice. Trouble is, this scoring project where we met (as well as second one we were in the room together for) was at the other test scoring place. She was looking for work, she did not hear of any assignments coming down the pike at the other test scoring place (at least not yet), and so she decided to go to the other test scoring company, where I was moonlighting (and still haven't let know about my double-dealing). She's not the only one; I have seen several familiar faces from the other place. But I think my secret's still safe with me. I think.
This co-worker of mine is not doing the same project as I, so our meetings since that first were restricted to passing by each other at the break room. However, a couple weeks ago, she told me that she was not only contacted by the other test scoring place for a job, but they were hiring her to come in early to train as an immediate supervisor. She begins training on that today, actually; she gave the test scoring place we were both at two week's notice. Great -- she actually would make an excellent one. And it's the one where I elected to come in and work nights and weekends for. I don't know if we'll be working with each other, but it'd be kind of a kick if she were my supervisor.
However, this test scoring place (though not the exact project) was the one where I had my first and, to this day, only call-up as an immediate supervisor myself. And that was way back in 2014, three years ago. I've been with that place ever since and obviously I'm going back again, so they want me back as a scorer (or at least they don't have anywhere else they can turn; this project I'll be moonlighting for needs hundreds of bodies). But I was told by the person who I was working for from that '14 project that I did good at my job, and I thought that meant other supervisory positions would thus roll my way. It hasn't happened yet, and in the meantime, my co-worker friend (who, again, is good enough and deserves a shot) has been tapped, and I think for the first time. In a sense, I have been passed over for her.
Why is that? I can only think back on my "work" the two years since. Well, the projects the past two years have been tougher because they're essays, and because of that I have had to slow down and really consider the work these students are putting into it. Maybe the slowdown has been reflected in my evaluations. Or maybe it's because I talked back to that one supervisor a couple years ago. Maybe she was spiteful enough to write me up. Or ... well, maybe this is it: For last year's project I was warned several times that I was going to the bathroom too many times. I snuck out even after being warned. That's it. I know I was written up for that. And if you get written up, there's no chance you'll get hired for a higher position.
You know, I once considered that place to be the better of the two test scoring places. That first-ever assignment, which I had been a part of for four years, the last of which as an immediate supervisor, was fun, stable and nurturing. Everything that had been at the other test scoring place, the one I'm working at now, was alright, but couldn't hold a candle to the dynamism, the alchemy that I found there. But then that project was either yanked or cancelled or discontinued, and there I have been shuttling from project to project, all with a certain amount of tension and indifference that made me question many times why I liked that company so much in the first place. (Having headquarters an hour away also damages my thoughts of it.) Since them I've been going back and forth between the two, mostly for the money but partly to see if there is anything company-wide that really differentiates one from the other. I thought it was the practice of hiring guys to become immediate supervisors once the project started, but it seems as though both companies do that, which really blows.
But, taking this into account, maybe this test scoring place, the one that pulled that deputizing bullshit last year on me first, may turn out to the better one after all. I will say this: Of the two places I work for, this is the one that's closer. And if it turns out that there are no difference after all, I might chose which one's my favorite because of that. Till then, I'll stick with these guys because apparently, I'm no longer immediate supervisor material to those guys.
Sunday, April 16, 2017
The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey
First off, Happy Easter, everyone.
#0: Gopher softball (Last Week: -1). I'm kind of running out of new angles to cover this team. That's not on them; I still don't know college softball all that much. What I do know is that this Gophers program, which re-ascended to its program-best #6 ranking this week, endured through three rain delays during Friday's storm to beat Northwestern at Cowles, 6-2, then came back from a 2-0 deficit to defeat the Wildcats Saturday, 3-2. Oh, and as of press time they are leading the Big Ten. OK, for those reasons I'm going to toss them a non-negative bone as the top team of the screening week.
After finishing up with the series-ender this (Sunday) afternoon, they will travel to Wisconsin to play in something I have never seen before, a midweek in-conference doubleheader. Guess they have to cram in those games when they can. They will then come home to host Iowa for a three-game set starting on Friday.
Hey, I just noticed something: As of press time, Michigan is tied for second place in the standings, and Ohio St. is fourth. The Golden Gophers don't play either good squad this season. Come to think of it, the series with the Hawkeyes may be the most competitive games the U. will have the rest of the year. Huh.
#-1: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -2). Hey, guess which other Gopher club is leading the B1G?! The Gopher baseball nine is, as of press time, atop of the table ... and by 1 1/2 games ... and this despite dropping their first conference contest yesterday (Saturday), a 13-12 shootout loss in Indiana. This a day after clubbing the Hoosiers 11-0. Add a 6-1 win at North Dakota St., and it's fair to say that hitting isn't a problem with the U. right now.
I'm looking at the rest of the team's schedule, and it's the damnedest thing, but just like with the softball squad, these guys are going to be able to duck what, at least for now, are the best contenders in the league. The three teams closest to the Gophers are Maryland, Michigan and Iowa. Minnesota will not play any of those teams this year. Huh? Just like with softball, baseball teams in the B1G apparently play only eight conference opponents. With the bloat of expansion, there are, technically, 13 other league opponents. Does it really make sense to not play so many fellow conference squads every year? Maybe anticipating the relative weakness in the conference slate, Manager John Anderson scheduled five games (at home) against two teams out-of-conference in order to bolster his club's resume for the NCAA Tournament. Two of those games are against Georgia St. The other three are against Long Beach St., which, as of the Baseball America poll for April 10, is ranked 12th in the nation. That series might feature the best foe the Gophers will play this season.
The U. has a four-game homestand over the next eight days -- well, after the rubber match today against Indiana. They host South Dakota St. Tuesday then Nebraska for three starting on Friday.
#-2: Twins (Last Week: -3). A 3-3 screening week in the middle of a part of the schedule that begins, and I didn't see this until just now when I was checking the schedule online, with the Twins playing exclusively American League Central Division squads. And as of right now, they are tied with the Detroit Tigers (which beat them two-of-three midweek) for the lead in the division. In fact, when you look at the majors as a whole, only Baltimore has fewer losses than Minnesota's four, and only Houston, Cincinnati and Colorado have more wins than Minnesota's seven. Whodathunk Minnesota would be a top ten team in the league two weeks into the season?
The lineup has produced well enough, even though the glaring worrisome spot remains with Byron Buxton. Near the top of the lineup Opening Day, he was dropped to the bottom fairly soon thereafter, and then dropped to the bench fairly soon thereafter that. The guy is a mainstay in Centerfield, but he still can't hit worth shit ... and yet his On-Base Percentage remains pretty high. So he can draw Walks but not generate hits with his bat? What do you do in the case? And with Buxton five years removed from being The Top Prospect In Major League Baseball, isn't he now who soon of us think he will ever be -- potentially a guy who till be in the bottom third of any ideal lineup?
Meanwhile, the pitching has, so far, been spectacular after being the main factor into the squad's downward spiral to The Worst Record In Twins History. Phil Hughes has been great, but it's Ervin Santana, at least this staff's ace, who has carried this team on his back. Santana threw a Complete Game, One-Hit Shutout in yesterday's (Saturday's) 6-0 win over the Chicago White Sox on Jackie Robinson Day. He has won his first three starts and has a 0.41 Earned Run Average. It's the first time Santana has won his first three starts to start a season. He's the first Twins Pitcher to go the distance in a CGSO since Scott Baker did it against Kansas City August 31, 2007. There shouldn't be that much of a gap. And it's only the 17th one-hit game in Twins history. There should be more. Anyway, Santana, who projects to be the third-, maybe second-, best Pitcher on a World Series team, is by far the ace so far this year for this team.
They spend the next eight days at Target Field. That coincides with the end of the run of A.L. Central teams they play to start their schedule: The rubber game vs. the Pale Hose, then four with Cleveland and then a three-game series vs. Detroit starting on Friday. At home. Just like the U. softball and baseball teams. A lot of rounders-based sports by the local teams starting series in the Twin Cities on Friday.
#-3: United FC (Last Week: -4). Copy note: I used to refer to these guys on the WMNSS just as "United." But then I realized that technically this team's name is "Minnesota United FC," so from now on they're going to be "United FC" when I list the side here.
I was at the North Star Roller Girls championship bout last (Saturday) night -- congratulations, Kilmore Girls -- so I was only able to follow the match at Houston through Twitter. So, a giveaway Goal and two substitutions due to injury, all before the second half? And they gave up an opening Goal within the opening third of the First Half? An absurd combination of bad luck, the Dynamo's 12 shots in the First Half and horrid play (specifically when it came to being ready when the fucking ball was being thrown into play) resulted in a 2-0 Halftime lead for the Dynamo, which portended a backslide for a side that seemed to have improved to just expansion team bad the past couple games.
And yet, with tallies by Christian Ramirez and Johan Venegas, and bend-but-not-break D, the Loons came back to tie Houston and take a point home with them. And from what FiftyFiveOne was saying, due to scoring chances by Ramirez, MNUFC could have won by four Goals and they could have lost by four Goals. It sounded like a cray-cray match. But hey, it's the Loons that were the first squad to take points from Houston in Houston this year.
They are off until next Sunday, when they start a three-game homestand.
#-4: Wild (Last Week: 0). Well, fuck. I don't know where to begin with this, dropping the first two games of the series at home to a St. Louis team that traditionally has pissed down their legs in the Stanley Cup Playoffs. The Mild had the Center depth they have chronically lacked. They had the better talent on paper. They have more points than the Blues. Advanced metrics at SI.com say the Wild are going to win the fucking Stanley Cup. AND NOW THEY'RE DOWN 2-0 TO ST. LOUIS, AND GOING ON THE ROAD, TOO?!?!?!
Yes, both games were decided by a Goal, and Blues Goalie Jake Allen has been standing on his head, and the Blues have shown a historic tendency to choke on leads like this. But the Wild are our team, and when it does something bad, of course we start slagging them. And we should. Because it's not as if we're the Chicago Blackhawks (which, by the way, also dropped the first two games of their series versus Nashville at home). We have an embarrassing history of underperforming in the postseason, and they're living up to that reputation right now. The inability to just score at any time despite defensive difficulty remains a bugaboo for this franchise, and it appears as though it will send them to another humiliating departure, despite being a chic pick to win the Cup.
Guys, this shit is on you to fix. Fix it.
#-Infinity: Timberwolves (Last Week: -5). OK, so I was at the home season finale Tuesday against The Bastard Seattle SuperSonics and Russell Westbrook, who, after passing Oscar Robertson for most triple-doubles in a season, didn't play at all. I don't know how my friend got rewarded to tickets to the home season finale, especially when the big news was the unveiling of the Woofie Dogs' new logo. But he got them.
(Aside on the logo. It's ... nice. It is also virtually identical to the team's secondary/court corner logo. I thought that for all the hype, it was going to be a radical departure from what we had, which, admittedly, wasn't bad. I also thought it would be busier. It has the North Star, something that apparently is now requisite for all Minnesota teams [and also not a bad thing]. And it steals the Seattle Seahawks' color scheme of deep blue and psychadelic/neon/puke green. We'll see if that's reflected in the team's new uniforms. But while it's clean ... again, it's virtually identical to what we already have, including the circle and the wolf howling at the moon. And you paid a design firm for this?)
Anyway, Oklahoma City ended the First Quarter doubling up the Dogs, but then the Wolves came back. They even led for a while, before Steven Adams started really killing the team from the inside and Dontas Sabonis and Victor Oladipo starting killing them from the outside. I like the play where Karl-Anthony Towns was going to take a three at the buzzer down two to win the game, but dammit, of course, he missed. That joins other near misses like yet another choke job at The Team That Was Stolen From Us (Basketball Version) and the regular season finale at Houston. An 0-3 week, and a six-game losing streak to end a year where they improved from 29 wins to 31, and not the 50 I was hoping for. Whoops.
Britt Robson of MinnPost centered on the club's lack of depth and defensive deficiencies in a piece late in the season. But he reiterates what I believe to be the main takeaway from this year. With the exception of Zach LaVine, who was lost to injury in the middle of the year, Tom Thibodeau had a year and decided to use it to run his best young players (Towns and Andrew Wiggins) to see what the hell he exactly had. It's a great strategy to see what is really in these players' hearts. Unfortunately, a year is enough to make solid conclusions, and it looks as though the putative future of this team rests on two players who are great on offense but suck on defense. Which happens to be the Head Coach's (and General Manager's) specialty. That both KAT and Wiggy sloughed off on D late in the year is even more disconcerting. This brings up the possibility that all those minutes they played this year (they are #1 and #2 in most minutes played) has burned them out ... both with playing basketball and, scarily, playing basketball under Thibs.
This is the point where one has to question the HC. He's not out there with the ball, KAT and Wiggy are. Thibs was fired from Chicago mostly because people started tuning his red ass out. Is that already starting with the Timberwolves? That is the important question to ask, and everybody on this squad has an entire offseason to answer it to the fans' benefit correctly.
#0: Gopher softball (Last Week: -1). I'm kind of running out of new angles to cover this team. That's not on them; I still don't know college softball all that much. What I do know is that this Gophers program, which re-ascended to its program-best #6 ranking this week, endured through three rain delays during Friday's storm to beat Northwestern at Cowles, 6-2, then came back from a 2-0 deficit to defeat the Wildcats Saturday, 3-2. Oh, and as of press time they are leading the Big Ten. OK, for those reasons I'm going to toss them a non-negative bone as the top team of the screening week.
After finishing up with the series-ender this (Sunday) afternoon, they will travel to Wisconsin to play in something I have never seen before, a midweek in-conference doubleheader. Guess they have to cram in those games when they can. They will then come home to host Iowa for a three-game set starting on Friday.
Hey, I just noticed something: As of press time, Michigan is tied for second place in the standings, and Ohio St. is fourth. The Golden Gophers don't play either good squad this season. Come to think of it, the series with the Hawkeyes may be the most competitive games the U. will have the rest of the year. Huh.
#-1: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -2). Hey, guess which other Gopher club is leading the B1G?! The Gopher baseball nine is, as of press time, atop of the table ... and by 1 1/2 games ... and this despite dropping their first conference contest yesterday (Saturday), a 13-12 shootout loss in Indiana. This a day after clubbing the Hoosiers 11-0. Add a 6-1 win at North Dakota St., and it's fair to say that hitting isn't a problem with the U. right now.
I'm looking at the rest of the team's schedule, and it's the damnedest thing, but just like with the softball squad, these guys are going to be able to duck what, at least for now, are the best contenders in the league. The three teams closest to the Gophers are Maryland, Michigan and Iowa. Minnesota will not play any of those teams this year. Huh? Just like with softball, baseball teams in the B1G apparently play only eight conference opponents. With the bloat of expansion, there are, technically, 13 other league opponents. Does it really make sense to not play so many fellow conference squads every year? Maybe anticipating the relative weakness in the conference slate, Manager John Anderson scheduled five games (at home) against two teams out-of-conference in order to bolster his club's resume for the NCAA Tournament. Two of those games are against Georgia St. The other three are against Long Beach St., which, as of the Baseball America poll for April 10, is ranked 12th in the nation. That series might feature the best foe the Gophers will play this season.
The U. has a four-game homestand over the next eight days -- well, after the rubber match today against Indiana. They host South Dakota St. Tuesday then Nebraska for three starting on Friday.
#-2: Twins (Last Week: -3). A 3-3 screening week in the middle of a part of the schedule that begins, and I didn't see this until just now when I was checking the schedule online, with the Twins playing exclusively American League Central Division squads. And as of right now, they are tied with the Detroit Tigers (which beat them two-of-three midweek) for the lead in the division. In fact, when you look at the majors as a whole, only Baltimore has fewer losses than Minnesota's four, and only Houston, Cincinnati and Colorado have more wins than Minnesota's seven. Whodathunk Minnesota would be a top ten team in the league two weeks into the season?
The lineup has produced well enough, even though the glaring worrisome spot remains with Byron Buxton. Near the top of the lineup Opening Day, he was dropped to the bottom fairly soon thereafter, and then dropped to the bench fairly soon thereafter that. The guy is a mainstay in Centerfield, but he still can't hit worth shit ... and yet his On-Base Percentage remains pretty high. So he can draw Walks but not generate hits with his bat? What do you do in the case? And with Buxton five years removed from being The Top Prospect In Major League Baseball, isn't he now who soon of us think he will ever be -- potentially a guy who till be in the bottom third of any ideal lineup?
Meanwhile, the pitching has, so far, been spectacular after being the main factor into the squad's downward spiral to The Worst Record In Twins History. Phil Hughes has been great, but it's Ervin Santana, at least this staff's ace, who has carried this team on his back. Santana threw a Complete Game, One-Hit Shutout in yesterday's (Saturday's) 6-0 win over the Chicago White Sox on Jackie Robinson Day. He has won his first three starts and has a 0.41 Earned Run Average. It's the first time Santana has won his first three starts to start a season. He's the first Twins Pitcher to go the distance in a CGSO since Scott Baker did it against Kansas City August 31, 2007. There shouldn't be that much of a gap. And it's only the 17th one-hit game in Twins history. There should be more. Anyway, Santana, who projects to be the third-, maybe second-, best Pitcher on a World Series team, is by far the ace so far this year for this team.
They spend the next eight days at Target Field. That coincides with the end of the run of A.L. Central teams they play to start their schedule: The rubber game vs. the Pale Hose, then four with Cleveland and then a three-game series vs. Detroit starting on Friday. At home. Just like the U. softball and baseball teams. A lot of rounders-based sports by the local teams starting series in the Twin Cities on Friday.
#-3: United FC (Last Week: -4). Copy note: I used to refer to these guys on the WMNSS just as "United." But then I realized that technically this team's name is "Minnesota United FC," so from now on they're going to be "United FC" when I list the side here.
I was at the North Star Roller Girls championship bout last (Saturday) night -- congratulations, Kilmore Girls -- so I was only able to follow the match at Houston through Twitter. So, a giveaway Goal and two substitutions due to injury, all before the second half? And they gave up an opening Goal within the opening third of the First Half? An absurd combination of bad luck, the Dynamo's 12 shots in the First Half and horrid play (specifically when it came to being ready when the fucking ball was being thrown into play) resulted in a 2-0 Halftime lead for the Dynamo, which portended a backslide for a side that seemed to have improved to just expansion team bad the past couple games.
And yet, with tallies by Christian Ramirez and Johan Venegas, and bend-but-not-break D, the Loons came back to tie Houston and take a point home with them. And from what FiftyFiveOne was saying, due to scoring chances by Ramirez, MNUFC could have won by four Goals and they could have lost by four Goals. It sounded like a cray-cray match. But hey, it's the Loons that were the first squad to take points from Houston in Houston this year.
They are off until next Sunday, when they start a three-game homestand.
#-4: Wild (Last Week: 0). Well, fuck. I don't know where to begin with this, dropping the first two games of the series at home to a St. Louis team that traditionally has pissed down their legs in the Stanley Cup Playoffs. The Mild had the Center depth they have chronically lacked. They had the better talent on paper. They have more points than the Blues. Advanced metrics at SI.com say the Wild are going to win the fucking Stanley Cup. AND NOW THEY'RE DOWN 2-0 TO ST. LOUIS, AND GOING ON THE ROAD, TOO?!?!?!
Yes, both games were decided by a Goal, and Blues Goalie Jake Allen has been standing on his head, and the Blues have shown a historic tendency to choke on leads like this. But the Wild are our team, and when it does something bad, of course we start slagging them. And we should. Because it's not as if we're the Chicago Blackhawks (which, by the way, also dropped the first two games of their series versus Nashville at home). We have an embarrassing history of underperforming in the postseason, and they're living up to that reputation right now. The inability to just score at any time despite defensive difficulty remains a bugaboo for this franchise, and it appears as though it will send them to another humiliating departure, despite being a chic pick to win the Cup.
Guys, this shit is on you to fix. Fix it.
#-Infinity: Timberwolves (Last Week: -5). OK, so I was at the home season finale Tuesday against The Bastard Seattle SuperSonics and Russell Westbrook, who, after passing Oscar Robertson for most triple-doubles in a season, didn't play at all. I don't know how my friend got rewarded to tickets to the home season finale, especially when the big news was the unveiling of the Woofie Dogs' new logo. But he got them.
(Aside on the logo. It's ... nice. It is also virtually identical to the team's secondary/court corner logo. I thought that for all the hype, it was going to be a radical departure from what we had, which, admittedly, wasn't bad. I also thought it would be busier. It has the North Star, something that apparently is now requisite for all Minnesota teams [and also not a bad thing]. And it steals the Seattle Seahawks' color scheme of deep blue and psychadelic/neon/puke green. We'll see if that's reflected in the team's new uniforms. But while it's clean ... again, it's virtually identical to what we already have, including the circle and the wolf howling at the moon. And you paid a design firm for this?)
Anyway, Oklahoma City ended the First Quarter doubling up the Dogs, but then the Wolves came back. They even led for a while, before Steven Adams started really killing the team from the inside and Dontas Sabonis and Victor Oladipo starting killing them from the outside. I like the play where Karl-Anthony Towns was going to take a three at the buzzer down two to win the game, but dammit, of course, he missed. That joins other near misses like yet another choke job at The Team That Was Stolen From Us (Basketball Version) and the regular season finale at Houston. An 0-3 week, and a six-game losing streak to end a year where they improved from 29 wins to 31, and not the 50 I was hoping for. Whoops.
Britt Robson of MinnPost centered on the club's lack of depth and defensive deficiencies in a piece late in the season. But he reiterates what I believe to be the main takeaway from this year. With the exception of Zach LaVine, who was lost to injury in the middle of the year, Tom Thibodeau had a year and decided to use it to run his best young players (Towns and Andrew Wiggins) to see what the hell he exactly had. It's a great strategy to see what is really in these players' hearts. Unfortunately, a year is enough to make solid conclusions, and it looks as though the putative future of this team rests on two players who are great on offense but suck on defense. Which happens to be the Head Coach's (and General Manager's) specialty. That both KAT and Wiggy sloughed off on D late in the year is even more disconcerting. This brings up the possibility that all those minutes they played this year (they are #1 and #2 in most minutes played) has burned them out ... both with playing basketball and, scarily, playing basketball under Thibs.
This is the point where one has to question the HC. He's not out there with the ball, KAT and Wiggy are. Thibs was fired from Chicago mostly because people started tuning his red ass out. Is that already starting with the Timberwolves? That is the important question to ask, and everybody on this squad has an entire offseason to answer it to the fans' benefit correctly.
Saturday, April 15, 2017
Addendum To: The E-Mail Backlog
Oh, I haven't mentioned that I took most of last weekend to finally get around to reading through and ultimately catching up with all the e-mail in my Yahoo! account. It felt really good to finally be rid of this task as of Sunday afternoon. It took a few hours before Saturday and Sunday. And, it precluded me working out, which is something I thought I wanted to do, but skipping exercising at the community center last weekend lets me start the clock on my month-long membership at a later date that would allow me to go work out more often.
I didn't realize how many e-mails I get each day. And although I know I signed up for all the junk messages I'm getting, this is getting to be too much. I need to start unsubscribing.
I didn't realize how many e-mails I get each day. And although I know I signed up for all the junk messages I'm getting, this is getting to be too much. I need to start unsubscribing.
To Tax March Or Not To Tax March
Ever since Donald Trump was elected President (with the help of Russian interference and voter suppression), I have considered myself to be, if you'll indulge me, "woke." It was time to get a little more active in my politics and to start caring less about who I might offend.
Also, this meant, to me, that I would actually start showing up at protests. I attended the huge Women's March and that already made me feel better because I didn't feel so outnumbered. It was shortly thereafter that I caught wind through Twitter of the Tax March that was going to take place April 15 -- today. I have tracked news of that ever since someone was brave and enterprising enough to stage a rally at the State Capitol (site of the Women's March) for Minnesota. It was only for a few hours, but like I did with the Women's, I would light rail it, take in the scene for an hour, and leave, dipping two toes instead of one into becoming more politically active. It would feel comfortable for me, and it would feel enough.
However, two things have spun that plan into doubt. First is the weather. I had a head's-up earlier in the week that the forecast Saturday afternoon, the three hours that the Tax March MN will be held, is rain, even heavy showers. I feel like a prick for saying this: I do support the cause of demanding that Donald Trump release his tax returns and to demand that the rich pay their fair share, but I don't want to galumph out in the rain to do it. Well, I do have an umbrella, but ... I don't know, maybe other people might not want to stand out in the rain either, even if they should to show up Trump, but if attendance is suppressed due to weather, I just might not show up.
Further complicating things is the fact that, on Thursday, we were told at work that we could come in to work Saturday, for as long as five hours, from 9-2. The Tax Day March goes from 11-2. I don't have to stay all five hours, but if to get any real meaning from driving to the west metro, I should stay for more than two hours. A part of me wants to say it's too late because I already made plans. (Oh, and this totally boots watching the EPL, which was my original plan.) Finally, there is a perverse message I am going to send if I go into work instead of marching. This should be a rally with one of its messages being equal pay and not needing to scrounge for every dollar. But I think I will eschew this hopefully huge event because I need to make money when extra work is offered. I want to rise above this, but I don't think I can, or will.
There is one huge spanner that might make me change my mind yet again. Starting Thursday afternoon, the room we are working in has gotten noticeably hot. It got worse yesterday (Friday) to the point where management was called in and fans were brought in. Those fans finally made a difference and cooled us all off late in the afternoon. But our room supervisor said that if the room remains hot on Monday, they will look into moving us. How about today (Saturday)? Don't know. I presume that we'll have fans, and if they work like they did yesterday (Friday) afternoon I can work for five hours. But I don't know if I can sweat through a half-day, let alone a weekend day, without them. If there are no fans or if thermostat isn't turned down or if the air conditioning isn't fixed, marching outside in St. Paul in a torrential downpour will feel like sweet relief. We'll see.
Also, this meant, to me, that I would actually start showing up at protests. I attended the huge Women's March and that already made me feel better because I didn't feel so outnumbered. It was shortly thereafter that I caught wind through Twitter of the Tax March that was going to take place April 15 -- today. I have tracked news of that ever since someone was brave and enterprising enough to stage a rally at the State Capitol (site of the Women's March) for Minnesota. It was only for a few hours, but like I did with the Women's, I would light rail it, take in the scene for an hour, and leave, dipping two toes instead of one into becoming more politically active. It would feel comfortable for me, and it would feel enough.
However, two things have spun that plan into doubt. First is the weather. I had a head's-up earlier in the week that the forecast Saturday afternoon, the three hours that the Tax March MN will be held, is rain, even heavy showers. I feel like a prick for saying this: I do support the cause of demanding that Donald Trump release his tax returns and to demand that the rich pay their fair share, but I don't want to galumph out in the rain to do it. Well, I do have an umbrella, but ... I don't know, maybe other people might not want to stand out in the rain either, even if they should to show up Trump, but if attendance is suppressed due to weather, I just might not show up.
Further complicating things is the fact that, on Thursday, we were told at work that we could come in to work Saturday, for as long as five hours, from 9-2. The Tax Day March goes from 11-2. I don't have to stay all five hours, but if to get any real meaning from driving to the west metro, I should stay for more than two hours. A part of me wants to say it's too late because I already made plans. (Oh, and this totally boots watching the EPL, which was my original plan.) Finally, there is a perverse message I am going to send if I go into work instead of marching. This should be a rally with one of its messages being equal pay and not needing to scrounge for every dollar. But I think I will eschew this hopefully huge event because I need to make money when extra work is offered. I want to rise above this, but I don't think I can, or will.
There is one huge spanner that might make me change my mind yet again. Starting Thursday afternoon, the room we are working in has gotten noticeably hot. It got worse yesterday (Friday) to the point where management was called in and fans were brought in. Those fans finally made a difference and cooled us all off late in the afternoon. But our room supervisor said that if the room remains hot on Monday, they will look into moving us. How about today (Saturday)? Don't know. I presume that we'll have fans, and if they work like they did yesterday (Friday) afternoon I can work for five hours. But I don't know if I can sweat through a half-day, let alone a weekend day, without them. If there are no fans or if thermostat isn't turned down or if the air conditioning isn't fixed, marching outside in St. Paul in a torrential downpour will feel like sweet relief. We'll see.
Friday, April 14, 2017
So once in a while at work we get a copy of how many essays we've read for the day. We have a quota, although I don't know of any specific consequences if I don't meet that quota. At least none to my knowledge; I have rarely met the quotas for my projects, yet I am back at this company for the eighth year.
When I got my copy around the halfway point this afternoon and saw that I am really low once again, I thought about what I was thinking about this morning. And I remembered: My parents potentially telling me they're selling the house; all the times they've disappointed me; my weird dreams that I will be incapacitated if not killed because of their stupid decisions or their neglect, etc. I space out a lot at work. A lot. Usually it's about bad things I fear will happen to me, although in better days I think about sex a lot.
Only now, however, have I realized that these anxieties, my home life, is affecting my work. You hear all those stories that students with dysfunctional domestic situations do poorly in school? Well, because of my dysfunctional domestic situation, I am doing poorly at work. I am no different from some kid with a turbulent home he has to come back to, day after day.
That's all I wanted to say.
When I got my copy around the halfway point this afternoon and saw that I am really low once again, I thought about what I was thinking about this morning. And I remembered: My parents potentially telling me they're selling the house; all the times they've disappointed me; my weird dreams that I will be incapacitated if not killed because of their stupid decisions or their neglect, etc. I space out a lot at work. A lot. Usually it's about bad things I fear will happen to me, although in better days I think about sex a lot.
Only now, however, have I realized that these anxieties, my home life, is affecting my work. You hear all those stories that students with dysfunctional domestic situations do poorly in school? Well, because of my dysfunctional domestic situation, I am doing poorly at work. I am no different from some kid with a turbulent home he has to come back to, day after day.
That's all I wanted to say.
Oh My God, They Are Going To Throw Me Out
So I'm coming home from the library last night where I worked on my taxes. That's all I was doing! That's all I was doing! So I take off my shoes and lock the door and put the keys on the sill ... and right next to it I see a business card.
I wouldn't have paid any more mind to it, but I noticed what it said on the upper-left corner: REMAX.
My God, now they're fucking hellbent on selling this house and making me fend for myself.
I can just see it now. I'll come home for dinner tonight, thinking everything's hunky-dory with us, and BOOM! they'll drop the bomb that they're going to sell the house.
I ... I ... I don't know what to do, I can't even think about it. ...
I wouldn't have paid any more mind to it, but I noticed what it said on the upper-left corner: REMAX.
My God, now they're fucking hellbent on selling this house and making me fend for myself.
I can just see it now. I'll come home for dinner tonight, thinking everything's hunky-dory with us, and BOOM! they'll drop the bomb that they're going to sell the house.
I ... I ... I don't know what to do, I can't even think about it. ...
Thursday, April 13, 2017
Person At Work Pissing Me Off, #4: Who's This Weirdo Douchebag Challenging Me?
As I've said before, test scorers are a strange lot. Guess that's why I feel so much at home. That being said, like with nearly all the places I've worked, there are a few people who rub me the wrong way. I've had a few run-ins this season here already, but there is one problem child who is actually in the room with me.
He's a young guy, younger than me. He sometimes wears his fur hat, and sometimes he wears it douchey. He sometimes puts his sunglasses on to work. He talks to his immediate supervisor a lot, like a bitch. And he gets up a lot, like me.
So a couple weeks ago I'm coming from the break room, fresh from a brain break, with a fresh cup of coffee. I'm walking slowly so as not to spill on myself. And then this assholes steams right by me and, as he looks back, says, I think, maybe, "Yeah, you take more breaks than I do!" And then he said something else.
At that point, I felt that shiver of fear rippling on my skin. This fucker just called me out for taking too many breaks! The fucking nerve of this asshole!! Like it's his business how many times I need to stand up and read the paper!!! And now this stranger dickhead who's challenging me is working in the same room as I am??? My God.
OK, I have to admit that when he said this I had my earplugs on, so he may not have said what I thought he said. Or, he did try to crack a joke. But ... well, it's too late, because I gave him a stare that from my point-of-view was one of intimidation but from his could have been one of anger. And he hasn't spoken to me since. So ... maybe he thinks I think he's a dick. Which I do. Even though that could be a mistake.
(sigh) Whatever, man, it's probably best just to avoid him.
He's a young guy, younger than me. He sometimes wears his fur hat, and sometimes he wears it douchey. He sometimes puts his sunglasses on to work. He talks to his immediate supervisor a lot, like a bitch. And he gets up a lot, like me.
So a couple weeks ago I'm coming from the break room, fresh from a brain break, with a fresh cup of coffee. I'm walking slowly so as not to spill on myself. And then this assholes steams right by me and, as he looks back, says, I think, maybe, "Yeah, you take more breaks than I do!" And then he said something else.
At that point, I felt that shiver of fear rippling on my skin. This fucker just called me out for taking too many breaks! The fucking nerve of this asshole!! Like it's his business how many times I need to stand up and read the paper!!! And now this stranger dickhead who's challenging me is working in the same room as I am??? My God.
OK, I have to admit that when he said this I had my earplugs on, so he may not have said what I thought he said. Or, he did try to crack a joke. But ... well, it's too late, because I gave him a stare that from my point-of-view was one of intimidation but from his could have been one of anger. And he hasn't spoken to me since. So ... maybe he thinks I think he's a dick. Which I do. Even though that could be a mistake.
(sigh) Whatever, man, it's probably best just to avoid him.
Wednesday, April 12, 2017
Expenses Without Receipts
Starting from Tuesday, April 11:
- Was invited by my friend out to the Timberwolves game, for which he had tickets. Surprising that it was against The Bastard Seattle SuperSonics, whose star, Russell Westbrook, set the record for most triple-doubles in a season (surpassing the great Oscar Robertson) the game before. But he didn't even dress for the game. Also, I'm surprised that he was given two complimentary tickets for the final home game of the regular season, where the new logo was unveiled. Hey, my gain, and I got a t-shirt out of it! Unfortunately, the Woofie Dogs lost trying to win the game on a three at the buzzer. In each seat's cupholder there was a coupon for a small Coke for just a buck out at the closet concession stand to us. I added a cheddar bratwurst because with a comp ticket, I thought I could spend an extra 50 cents to upgrade from the run-of-the-mill hot dog! Total price for the food: $8.50.
- On to Saturday the 8th ... I went to the library to print out tax forms. One of the forms was a mistake and thus a waste. Total cost: $1.
- Went to our alumni club's local watering spot that evening. I have made it kind of a tradition to go there to watch the Frozen Four Final/championship game in men's college hockey. Good game: Denver outlasted Minnesota-Duluth with a late flurry of stops, 3-2. With tip for a meal, beer and Pepsi: $20.
- ETA at (11:16 p.m.) on April 12 that I forgot that there was another thing I spent money on at the above watering hole. I stumbled into a company's raffle giveaway, and I decided to play along and throw some money in for prizes I didn't like (I think there was an autographed hockey stick and a tent) and, alas, I didn't win. Nevertheless I hope that money went for a good cause: $5.
- Went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Version) afterwards. There is a chick there that really got fresh with me; she pulled up my shirt and played with my nipples. I wasn't sure if she wouldn't take my dick out of my pants, too. But then she got really weird, saying all these crazy things and telling me to give her $300 and shit. It's like as if Tracy Morgan were a stripper. I got so frazzled that I decided not to get a lapper from any of the girls. This stripper hit me up for another $2, $2 I was going to give to Sammi. I apologized for not being able to giver her any tips onstage, but I got an LD from her the last time I saw her, so I hope it's cool. As for this chick ... I don't know if I want to see her again or if I really want to see her again. Coffee and tips only: $11.75.
- Went to the local Glam Doll after that, for donuts and coffee. Was worried that I would have to fast before doing the second part of the two-day experiment at the U. Sunday morning, but I didn't have to. Two donuts and a pourover coffee and tip: $12.02.
- On Friday the 7th I did what I think I have done only once before and, after thinking I would not go to either, I went to two stripper parties. I was determined to get my rocks off that evening, but I wasn't planning on going to either place because I didn't know with who. But I was convinced to go to both because both houses were so close. And I finally decided that it's OK to get fucked by *****e* (who made me cum by fucking me with a condom on, something I have rarely been able to do) and only get tame dances at the other party because *****e*, as host, invited me to the first party and Nikki, a good girl, invited me to the second. (To expound, there were, like, four girls who would do bad things to me at Nikki's party, but since none of them invited me, I felt it was ... OK to not expose my pee-pee to them.) However, I have to conclude that I won't be going to either place for a while. For *****e*, it's because her indoor doors don't have locks on them. I would like to think her giving me head would be the thing I remember from her party, but instead it'll be the drunk and borderline disturbed Mexican who walked in on us. For the VIP experience: $110.
- As for not going back to this party, Nikki did something I hated her doing back at her old place: For some goddamn reason, she didn't turn the air conditioning on, and therefore it was unbearably hot upstairs. She's an adopted Korean, and I doubt she's ever been to Asia, but somehow she has adopted the non-American practice of not using the aircon. Christ. Cover and four $20 dances equals: $100.
- Thursday, April 6 -- went to the library. Guessing that's where and when I found a penny, heads-up. An Infusion of: 1 cent.
- Go all the way back to April Fools' Day, where United FC actually won their first-ever MLS match over Real Salt Lake. April Fools! No, not April Fools -- they actually won! And I overestimated the crowd and sailed through security and got there so early that I had time to buy a hot dog and a Red's Apple Ale!: $14.50.
- Went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Division) after the game. There, for the first time in months, was the sexy Sky. I thought she was out of my life for good, but apparently she only moved to Brooklyn for a while. Now she's back -- and after getting a lap dance from her, I remembered how flighty and diffident she could be! OK! With tips and a Sprite, the total came to: $31.75.
- But one plus to this visit was that I actually found a $10 on the floor of the bar. Luckily no one was around me to see me pick it up and pocket it. Damn, I needed that money. An Infusion of: $10.
- Went to Glam Doll afterwards, the same one as the week before. Have never gone here back-to-back, but because My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Edition) is so close, I guess I just had to go here instead of the original one in South. With tip: $12.02.
- Let's take it all the way back to Saturday, March 25, where I went to the library because I needed to print out some things, most notably this IKEA list from my sister. Total: 50 cents.
- I went to my first roller derby bout of the season. Haven't had time to go either local league, and with St. Paul extending parking meter enforcement to Saturdays, frankly I have little reason to go to the Minnesota RollerGirls now, even though they are a damn good league. I went to the North Star Roller Girls instead, where parking on the State Fairgrounds is still free, thank Buddha. The derby was of a lower quality, but it still was fun. Plus they played Prince during jams, and for halftime they brought out the local hula-hoop hobby group. I didn't know there was one. I had my eye on this particular cutie. She wore a purple top that exposed her midriff. Moreover, her hula hoop moves were the best, by far. She made the half hour halftime (seriously, they need to cut that down) sail by! Ticket, a can of Sociable Freewheeler (I've been on a hard cider kick lately) and tip: $25.
- Went to the original Glam Doll Donuts after the bout because I think South is closer. With tip: $10.13.
- Finally, on Friday, March 24 I went to the local Mensa group for dinner. They get together for dinner every third Friday, but usually on the south side of town. However, that place was going to be packed due to Lenten Fridays, so they thought the place where they hold meetings for First Fridays would be a lot quieter, and it was. Since it is so close to me, I decided to come, at least this one time. I charged the meal, but I stayed a bit afterward to talk, and you need to pay $5 for the privilege. And the local VFW was holding a meat raffle, so I bought a ticket for that. All told, the cash coming out of my pocket for this event was: $6.
Good through April 11.
Tuesday, April 11, 2017
RIP, Vista (For The Most Part)
So I woke up this morning (after falling asleep early last evening -- My Fucking Father called for me through my bedroom door because both parents came up to eat something; he didn't seem upset at the time, but this is one of those cases where he will bring up "not having a schedule" and use it against me some time later when he wants to yell at me for not being a grown-up like all the other 41-year-olds, like a passive-aggressive cocksucker), decided I should blog post for the day (I am going to the Timberwolves game tonight, but don't tell Father, shhhhhhhhhhh) and I see that, after months of warnings, Microsoft has finally stopped providing security for Windows Vista as of April 11, 2017. Let the record show.
I have had big problems with my laptop (the one that I'm using right now, for this) for several years. But it's due to old age, a worn-out processor, and the path towards failure that inexplicably began when I bought a battery online and essentially ruined my computer. I don't think much of it breaking down had anything to do with the operating system. And I know that it will go down as a vilified detour in the evolutionary chain of Windows OS, but the bugs that made people hate Vista never really affected me, a guy who uses the Internet a lot but doesn't play games or watch movies on it.
So for the past month or so I have relied on free antivirus support for when a day like this finally comes. The problem -- and I think I have told this before -- is that I have to bring it down in order to successfully connect to our wi-fi. I'm so scared now that Vista isn't supported by Microsoft that whenever I do that, I feel as though I'm stepping out into the middle of The Purge.
Last (Monday) night, while helping Mother with some stuff she needed to fax, I took Father's junk Dell catalog. I've been thinking about getting a new lap for a while, and for a while I've had my eye set on an XPS, specifically the cheaper XPS 13. I can get it for $720 if I buy by early May. I don't know if I have the dough for that right now, but this move by Microsoft adds more pressure to finally move on to a new computer, one that has Windows 10 and is more stable than what others believed Vista to be.
At any rate, RIP, Vista. You never did anything wrong to me.
I have had big problems with my laptop (the one that I'm using right now, for this) for several years. But it's due to old age, a worn-out processor, and the path towards failure that inexplicably began when I bought a battery online and essentially ruined my computer. I don't think much of it breaking down had anything to do with the operating system. And I know that it will go down as a vilified detour in the evolutionary chain of Windows OS, but the bugs that made people hate Vista never really affected me, a guy who uses the Internet a lot but doesn't play games or watch movies on it.
So for the past month or so I have relied on free antivirus support for when a day like this finally comes. The problem -- and I think I have told this before -- is that I have to bring it down in order to successfully connect to our wi-fi. I'm so scared now that Vista isn't supported by Microsoft that whenever I do that, I feel as though I'm stepping out into the middle of The Purge.
Last (Monday) night, while helping Mother with some stuff she needed to fax, I took Father's junk Dell catalog. I've been thinking about getting a new lap for a while, and for a while I've had my eye set on an XPS, specifically the cheaper XPS 13. I can get it for $720 if I buy by early May. I don't know if I have the dough for that right now, but this move by Microsoft adds more pressure to finally move on to a new computer, one that has Windows 10 and is more stable than what others believed Vista to be.
At any rate, RIP, Vista. You never did anything wrong to me.
Monday, April 10, 2017
So It Is True, Mother
The housing market has been hot for the past couple of years. I've seen it in the news, and I can't help but look around me and see several properties on my street with "For Sale" signs up on the front yard, followed extremely quickly by "SOLD" signs. So it wasn't too much of a leap of faith to know that, deep down inside, my parents want to sell this house, too.
It's obvious why. If this house gets on the market, chances are it'll sell within the day. I guarantee it. Plus they'll get a fortune, especially compared to how much they paid for it back 40 some-odd years ago. They have no more ties to the area. They sold The Store, and even though there are relatives very close by, my folks never talk to them. They are in the process of selling all the rental properties they acquired in the area; they say that the bureaucracy with the city of Minneapolis got to be too much for them. They do, however, still have their real estate in Las Vegas, and they are quite intent on being there a lot more throughout the year, if not full-time.
They are empty nesters, but unlike some, they don't seem to be heart-broken that my brother, sister and Grandmother have moved out. It's just me. I am the sole impediment to their plan. Yet I am the impediment that is blocking the plan. Even though my parents bought this house and thus were cognizant that it was under the ownership of someone else before them, for all I know, this house has always been ours. And goddammit, it'll remain so as long as I have any say in it. I can't bear seeing myself living somewhere else besides the only place I've ever known. I certainly can't afford to live out on my own. Not like I want to, either. It's like The Store; if there ever comes a time that I will have to leave this place, it'll be like a piece of my died. And frankly, I can't take any more change or stress if I have to move. And my God, the moving!!!
Still, if they can sell The Store and evict Grandmother, giving away the house would have to be next on their to-do list. I just assumed that, and was OK keeping that sentiment unspoken. But it kind of erupted yesterday (Sunday) morning.
This weekend I was a participant in a research study at the U. I had to wake up and get to the tube at 8 both weekend days. However I did not tell my parents that. There truly was a possibility that a person from the alumni group needed my help moving out of her place this weekend. It did not come to be; she decided to hire movers instead. But considering the blow-up My Fucking Father had on me, I decided to tell them that the reason I was busy this weekend (and the reason I had to wake up so early Saturday and Sunday) was to help her move. I was going to help her Friday and Saturday evenings, too; that way I could sneak out to parties on the former night and head downtown to watch the Frozen Four Final the latter.
Sunday morning I am leaving. Both parental units are in the dining room. They ask me what time I'll be home for dinner: "Six? So late?" Mother said. "Well, we're not done moving yet," I replied.
And then Mother scooted to the top of the stairs and dropped the bomb on me. "Hey, ask her if she's selling the house. I want to buy it, sell this house and move you there. How's about that?"
So it is true, Mother. You want me out of the house so you can sell it. That was the point -- yesterday morning -- when I know for absolute certain that I was blocking their dreams of getting rid of their past. My past, my childhood, just so they can make a buck. And while I understand it, by Buddha, I was totally unprepared for the psychosomatic punch to the gut I felt. I didn't even hide it; I was nearly crying when I stammered out, "But I like living here!" before I staggered my way out to the car.
(I will say this. There is a chance this is a sentiment prompted by Mother. Saturday a new family moved into the house to the left of us. And ... ah, shit, my parents are racist: They're a black family [possibly West Indian] and they think that means the neighborhood's going to shit. Maybe that's why she said she wanted to move. But I still think they've wanted to move in order to cash in for a long time.)
Honestly, I was as close to suffering a heart attack all day as I ever have in my life. I parked in Rosedale just so I could recuperate and think of a story about what to tell her, and to just ... deal with the fact that they want to move out and want me to move out too. It's not fun knowing that I am the loser/asshole son standing in the way of their dreams and plans. But ... fuck, I CAN'T MOVE OUT!!! I CAN'T LIVE OUT THERE IN THE REAL WORLD BY MYSELF!!! MOTHER SAID THAT SHE'D HELP WITH THE DOWN PAYMENT ON ANY NEW HOUSE, BUT WHAT ABOUT THE MORTGAGE PAYMENTS??? I CAN'T PAY THAT ON JUST MY TEMP SCORING JOB!!! AND WHAT HAPPENS IF I LOSE THAT, TOO?!?!?!
I'm 41 years old and I still haven't moved out. And while I really don't want to move out, it's time like yesterday morning where I'm acutely aware that I am not like other people. I know that people my age have established jobs and are raising families. That's not me, and I know it's way too late to start. And so I know that I have become such a burden on my parents that they no longer know what to do with me. They probably think they failed raising me. And ... well, they have, it's times like these where I examine what is wrong with me. All I know, and all I have ever expected out of life, is to go to sleep in a safe place and wake up in a safe place and just ... be, you know? I get mad a lot, but so long as I have this place to call home, I think I'm doing OK. So without it, regardless of financial situation or want to do something more or live somewhere else, is a huge and indelible part of my life. And it's a hallmark symptom of my abandonment issues that I can't just move on and do something else and leave here because I don't know where I'd be.
---
My heart was palpitating to the point of bursting all day. I finally had to face the music -- and get my lie straight -- and come home. And I told Mother that I asked "my friend" about the house and she said that her ex-husband got it in the divorce proceedings and that's why she's moving. And ... that seemed to be the end of it with her.
And so my heart is beating a little more normal now, and my parents and I are back where we were -- in a standoff, them being weighed down by me until I get my shit together. Except that I know that I will forever be unable to get my shit together, because I am a disappointing son.
It's obvious why. If this house gets on the market, chances are it'll sell within the day. I guarantee it. Plus they'll get a fortune, especially compared to how much they paid for it back 40 some-odd years ago. They have no more ties to the area. They sold The Store, and even though there are relatives very close by, my folks never talk to them. They are in the process of selling all the rental properties they acquired in the area; they say that the bureaucracy with the city of Minneapolis got to be too much for them. They do, however, still have their real estate in Las Vegas, and they are quite intent on being there a lot more throughout the year, if not full-time.
They are empty nesters, but unlike some, they don't seem to be heart-broken that my brother, sister and Grandmother have moved out. It's just me. I am the sole impediment to their plan. Yet I am the impediment that is blocking the plan. Even though my parents bought this house and thus were cognizant that it was under the ownership of someone else before them, for all I know, this house has always been ours. And goddammit, it'll remain so as long as I have any say in it. I can't bear seeing myself living somewhere else besides the only place I've ever known. I certainly can't afford to live out on my own. Not like I want to, either. It's like The Store; if there ever comes a time that I will have to leave this place, it'll be like a piece of my died. And frankly, I can't take any more change or stress if I have to move. And my God, the moving!!!
Still, if they can sell The Store and evict Grandmother, giving away the house would have to be next on their to-do list. I just assumed that, and was OK keeping that sentiment unspoken. But it kind of erupted yesterday (Sunday) morning.
This weekend I was a participant in a research study at the U. I had to wake up and get to the tube at 8 both weekend days. However I did not tell my parents that. There truly was a possibility that a person from the alumni group needed my help moving out of her place this weekend. It did not come to be; she decided to hire movers instead. But considering the blow-up My Fucking Father had on me, I decided to tell them that the reason I was busy this weekend (and the reason I had to wake up so early Saturday and Sunday) was to help her move. I was going to help her Friday and Saturday evenings, too; that way I could sneak out to parties on the former night and head downtown to watch the Frozen Four Final the latter.
Sunday morning I am leaving. Both parental units are in the dining room. They ask me what time I'll be home for dinner: "Six? So late?" Mother said. "Well, we're not done moving yet," I replied.
And then Mother scooted to the top of the stairs and dropped the bomb on me. "Hey, ask her if she's selling the house. I want to buy it, sell this house and move you there. How's about that?"
So it is true, Mother. You want me out of the house so you can sell it. That was the point -- yesterday morning -- when I know for absolute certain that I was blocking their dreams of getting rid of their past. My past, my childhood, just so they can make a buck. And while I understand it, by Buddha, I was totally unprepared for the psychosomatic punch to the gut I felt. I didn't even hide it; I was nearly crying when I stammered out, "But I like living here!" before I staggered my way out to the car.
(I will say this. There is a chance this is a sentiment prompted by Mother. Saturday a new family moved into the house to the left of us. And ... ah, shit, my parents are racist: They're a black family [possibly West Indian] and they think that means the neighborhood's going to shit. Maybe that's why she said she wanted to move. But I still think they've wanted to move in order to cash in for a long time.)
Honestly, I was as close to suffering a heart attack all day as I ever have in my life. I parked in Rosedale just so I could recuperate and think of a story about what to tell her, and to just ... deal with the fact that they want to move out and want me to move out too. It's not fun knowing that I am the loser/asshole son standing in the way of their dreams and plans. But ... fuck, I CAN'T MOVE OUT!!! I CAN'T LIVE OUT THERE IN THE REAL WORLD BY MYSELF!!! MOTHER SAID THAT SHE'D HELP WITH THE DOWN PAYMENT ON ANY NEW HOUSE, BUT WHAT ABOUT THE MORTGAGE PAYMENTS??? I CAN'T PAY THAT ON JUST MY TEMP SCORING JOB!!! AND WHAT HAPPENS IF I LOSE THAT, TOO?!?!?!
I'm 41 years old and I still haven't moved out. And while I really don't want to move out, it's time like yesterday morning where I'm acutely aware that I am not like other people. I know that people my age have established jobs and are raising families. That's not me, and I know it's way too late to start. And so I know that I have become such a burden on my parents that they no longer know what to do with me. They probably think they failed raising me. And ... well, they have, it's times like these where I examine what is wrong with me. All I know, and all I have ever expected out of life, is to go to sleep in a safe place and wake up in a safe place and just ... be, you know? I get mad a lot, but so long as I have this place to call home, I think I'm doing OK. So without it, regardless of financial situation or want to do something more or live somewhere else, is a huge and indelible part of my life. And it's a hallmark symptom of my abandonment issues that I can't just move on and do something else and leave here because I don't know where I'd be.
---
My heart was palpitating to the point of bursting all day. I finally had to face the music -- and get my lie straight -- and come home. And I told Mother that I asked "my friend" about the house and she said that her ex-husband got it in the divorce proceedings and that's why she's moving. And ... that seemed to be the end of it with her.
And so my heart is beating a little more normal now, and my parents and I are back where we were -- in a standoff, them being weighed down by me until I get my shit together. Except that I know that I will forever be unable to get my shit together, because I am a disappointing son.
Sunday, April 9, 2017
The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey
(I have to tell y'all that I'm doing this under severe personal and physical distress right now. I'll try and talk about it for the blog post tomorrow, if I'm able to even write about it. But let's just get to the survey.)
#0: Wild (Last Week: -5). OK, I don't want to poo-poo what the Wild were able to do this screening week. The club went undefeated in their four games, and with Saturday's regular season-ending 3-1 win at The Bastard Winnipeg Jets (with soon-to-be Vegas Golden Knight Darcy Kuemper inbetween the pipes) they set franchise records for wins and points in a year. They also assured themselves second place in the Central Division and, for the first time since 2007 (?) they get home-ice advantage for a series, specifically the first round against the St. Louis Blues.
But they don't get Positive Numbers for this. First of all, this team was ticketed for the best record in the Western Conference before their slump in March. (Chicago won the division, BTW, so that old monster will pop up for the Mild in the second round.) Second of all those four teams the Mild beat last week were The Bastard Jets, The Bastard Quebec Nordiques (twice) and The Bastard Hartford Whalers. Not only are they all stolen teams, none of them will be playing past this weekend. The Mild beat them up good, but there are no shitty teams in the Stanley Cup Playoffs. Finally, even though momentum (or lack thereof) means very little in hockey, neither does home-ice. All I can think of is that the Mild, under serial underachiever Bruce Boudreau, will squander what is the best season in franchise history, one that still feels underwhelming. (Oh, and Zach Parise got hit in the face with a stick Saturday night. Hope he's OK.)
Says here Blues in 6. Book it.
#-1: Gopher softball (Last Week: -3). The train keeps a-rollin' for this squad. They sweep a doubleheader on South Dakota Tuesday at Cowles and by the quickest possible, mercy rules of five innings (8-0 and 12-0, by the way). They added two more mercy rule (also five innings) games in a three-game sweep of Indiana at home this weekend (10-2 and 8-0). Both games ended on Grand Slams. Makes you wonder how Friday's 11-6 win went. (BTW, those run rule games were played Saturday; Sunday's game was moved up because people think there's going to be rain today. It's sunny as I type this.) They should threaten their best-ever ranking of sixth this week, wherein they will host Northwestern over the weekend.
#-2: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -2). OK, so this is really weird. It goes without fail that weather disrupts significant portions of the U.'s season. I don't remember, however, if anything happened quite like what happened Thursday and Friday. I haven't been up to the local weather, let alone the weather on the East Coast. But apparently a storm out east cancelled the flight of Rutgers, the Gophers' opponent this weekend at Siebert Field, and therefore Friday's game was not just postponed but outright cancelled.
They announced this Thursday; they also said that they were going to give more information about the other two games later. That news came Friday; Rutgers still wasn't in the Twin Cities. And since (I'm guessing) alternate plans were either too complicated or too expensive for the Scarlet Knights' budget, the other two games -- and thus the entire series -- was cancelled. Damn.
So all I have to go on to update the status of this team are Tuesday's 7-1 rout of North Dakota St. that opened up play at Siebert for the year and Sunday's sweep-completing 9-4 win over Michigan St. in East Lansing. (Remember that I did last week's survey so late into Sunday afternoon. I officially published it before I checked the team's Twitter feed; it looks as though the survey went live just as the team was headed into the ninth inning. Therefore it was possible that if I waited a tad longer, that victory over the Spartans would have counted for last week's WMNSS. Just a note.) That this team cancelled more games this week than they actually played is unusual, but not that unusual for this program.
They return the Bison's favor and play in Fargo Tuesday, then visit Indiana for an important three-game set ... assuming it is not cancelled due to weather.
#-3: Twins (Last Week: -6). Well, for a start to a season the Twinks did pretty good! They started off 2016, I think, going 0-7, but for 2017 they actually won four in a row to begin the year, including a three-game sweep of the Kansas City Royals. They beat the White Sox in Chicago Friday, even though Saturday's 6-2 setback ensured the ballclub wouldn't go undefeated this year. An encouraging early sign is that the offense which carried the Twins in 2015 is back, at least so far, including monster seventh innings in the three games vs. K.C. Pitching is better, much better, but let's see how a non-descript arsenal with no power and suspect control will do over the course of half a calendar year. Bottom line: It's a hell of a lot better than last year. After finishing up this afternoon at Comiskey, they play a trio in Detroit starting on Tuesday, then come home for a three-game series versus those same Pale Hose.
#-4: United (Last Week: -1). Lost last (Saturday) night at FC Dallas, 2-0. Hey, at least they kept it under four Goals, right? They play at the Houston Dynamo Saturday.
#-5: Timberwolves (Last Week: -4). OK, first of all I wondered why the Woofie Dogs were playing Portland at home Monday then playing at Golden State Tuesday. I forgot that the Trail Blazers game was the rescheduled one from last month because of condensation rising up from underneath. They won that game, albeit barely, 110-109. But then they proceeded to lose the three pre-scheduled contests for the week, including the 21st and 22nd times they blew a double-digit lead. Like I said last week, this team is young, but Tom Thibodeau has played enough of his young corps enough this year to make good, concrete conclusions about who these guys are and how they will play. And it looks like this group, in its entirety, is a goddamn failure, especially on the defensive end. Really, if this roster needs to be blown up, I can't totally disagree. I mean it, it is that frustrating.
At least this week is the final week for this damned squad. At The Team That Was Stolen From Us (Basketball Version), home to The Bastard Seattle SuperSonics, then at Houston to close out the regular season.
#0: Wild (Last Week: -5). OK, I don't want to poo-poo what the Wild were able to do this screening week. The club went undefeated in their four games, and with Saturday's regular season-ending 3-1 win at The Bastard Winnipeg Jets (with soon-to-be Vegas Golden Knight Darcy Kuemper inbetween the pipes) they set franchise records for wins and points in a year. They also assured themselves second place in the Central Division and, for the first time since 2007 (?) they get home-ice advantage for a series, specifically the first round against the St. Louis Blues.
But they don't get Positive Numbers for this. First of all, this team was ticketed for the best record in the Western Conference before their slump in March. (Chicago won the division, BTW, so that old monster will pop up for the Mild in the second round.) Second of all those four teams the Mild beat last week were The Bastard Jets, The Bastard Quebec Nordiques (twice) and The Bastard Hartford Whalers. Not only are they all stolen teams, none of them will be playing past this weekend. The Mild beat them up good, but there are no shitty teams in the Stanley Cup Playoffs. Finally, even though momentum (or lack thereof) means very little in hockey, neither does home-ice. All I can think of is that the Mild, under serial underachiever Bruce Boudreau, will squander what is the best season in franchise history, one that still feels underwhelming. (Oh, and Zach Parise got hit in the face with a stick Saturday night. Hope he's OK.)
Says here Blues in 6. Book it.
#-1: Gopher softball (Last Week: -3). The train keeps a-rollin' for this squad. They sweep a doubleheader on South Dakota Tuesday at Cowles and by the quickest possible, mercy rules of five innings (8-0 and 12-0, by the way). They added two more mercy rule (also five innings) games in a three-game sweep of Indiana at home this weekend (10-2 and 8-0). Both games ended on Grand Slams. Makes you wonder how Friday's 11-6 win went. (BTW, those run rule games were played Saturday; Sunday's game was moved up because people think there's going to be rain today. It's sunny as I type this.) They should threaten their best-ever ranking of sixth this week, wherein they will host Northwestern over the weekend.
#-2: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -2). OK, so this is really weird. It goes without fail that weather disrupts significant portions of the U.'s season. I don't remember, however, if anything happened quite like what happened Thursday and Friday. I haven't been up to the local weather, let alone the weather on the East Coast. But apparently a storm out east cancelled the flight of Rutgers, the Gophers' opponent this weekend at Siebert Field, and therefore Friday's game was not just postponed but outright cancelled.
They announced this Thursday; they also said that they were going to give more information about the other two games later. That news came Friday; Rutgers still wasn't in the Twin Cities. And since (I'm guessing) alternate plans were either too complicated or too expensive for the Scarlet Knights' budget, the other two games -- and thus the entire series -- was cancelled. Damn.
So all I have to go on to update the status of this team are Tuesday's 7-1 rout of North Dakota St. that opened up play at Siebert for the year and Sunday's sweep-completing 9-4 win over Michigan St. in East Lansing. (Remember that I did last week's survey so late into Sunday afternoon. I officially published it before I checked the team's Twitter feed; it looks as though the survey went live just as the team was headed into the ninth inning. Therefore it was possible that if I waited a tad longer, that victory over the Spartans would have counted for last week's WMNSS. Just a note.) That this team cancelled more games this week than they actually played is unusual, but not that unusual for this program.
They return the Bison's favor and play in Fargo Tuesday, then visit Indiana for an important three-game set ... assuming it is not cancelled due to weather.
#-3: Twins (Last Week: -6). Well, for a start to a season the Twinks did pretty good! They started off 2016, I think, going 0-7, but for 2017 they actually won four in a row to begin the year, including a three-game sweep of the Kansas City Royals. They beat the White Sox in Chicago Friday, even though Saturday's 6-2 setback ensured the ballclub wouldn't go undefeated this year. An encouraging early sign is that the offense which carried the Twins in 2015 is back, at least so far, including monster seventh innings in the three games vs. K.C. Pitching is better, much better, but let's see how a non-descript arsenal with no power and suspect control will do over the course of half a calendar year. Bottom line: It's a hell of a lot better than last year. After finishing up this afternoon at Comiskey, they play a trio in Detroit starting on Tuesday, then come home for a three-game series versus those same Pale Hose.
#-4: United (Last Week: -1). Lost last (Saturday) night at FC Dallas, 2-0. Hey, at least they kept it under four Goals, right? They play at the Houston Dynamo Saturday.
#-5: Timberwolves (Last Week: -4). OK, first of all I wondered why the Woofie Dogs were playing Portland at home Monday then playing at Golden State Tuesday. I forgot that the Trail Blazers game was the rescheduled one from last month because of condensation rising up from underneath. They won that game, albeit barely, 110-109. But then they proceeded to lose the three pre-scheduled contests for the week, including the 21st and 22nd times they blew a double-digit lead. Like I said last week, this team is young, but Tom Thibodeau has played enough of his young corps enough this year to make good, concrete conclusions about who these guys are and how they will play. And it looks like this group, in its entirety, is a goddamn failure, especially on the defensive end. Really, if this roster needs to be blown up, I can't totally disagree. I mean it, it is that frustrating.
At least this week is the final week for this damned squad. At The Team That Was Stolen From Us (Basketball Version), home to The Bastard Seattle SuperSonics, then at Houston to close out the regular season.
Saturday, April 8, 2017
Addendum To: Vicious Hand Lovin', I Hope And Presume
Yeah, uh, no. I drove downtown, went to the library to print something out, walked a good 20 minutes across downtown to just outside of the hotel, and texted ***e*, waiting for her to either text me the apartment number or for her to come down to let me in.
I kind of gave her 15, 20 minutes. I got desperate enough that I texted *******y, the other girl presumably working that night. I got no response from her, or from ***e*, and so I left, heartbroken but with my wallet $160 fuller.
Later that evening *******y finally got back to me and basically didn't know what I was talking about. The next day ***e* got back to me and apologized because she fell asleep in the hotel room. I still don't know what happened, nor what the plan was. ***e* said *******y was there to work, but *******y said that she was bringing her kids over to stay for the night.
You know, a part of me thinks this is part of a ruse by, of all people, my parents. ***e*, or
"***e*," texted me about this party from a brand-new number, but I didn't think anything of it because she changes her number often. But now I think this was a dummy number set up by my folks because they know that I am a stripper hound. They wanted to see if I would leave the house or something. I haven't spoken to either girl yet, after all. OK, this is a paranoid part of me. But right now I have no idea what they're cooking up to get me.
I kind of gave her 15, 20 minutes. I got desperate enough that I texted *******y, the other girl presumably working that night. I got no response from her, or from ***e*, and so I left, heartbroken but with my wallet $160 fuller.
Later that evening *******y finally got back to me and basically didn't know what I was talking about. The next day ***e* got back to me and apologized because she fell asleep in the hotel room. I still don't know what happened, nor what the plan was. ***e* said *******y was there to work, but *******y said that she was bringing her kids over to stay for the night.
You know, a part of me thinks this is part of a ruse by, of all people, my parents. ***e*, or
"***e*," texted me about this party from a brand-new number, but I didn't think anything of it because she changes her number often. But now I think this was a dummy number set up by my folks because they know that I am a stripper hound. They wanted to see if I would leave the house or something. I haven't spoken to either girl yet, after all. OK, this is a paranoid part of me. But right now I have no idea what they're cooking up to get me.
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