OnlyFans OnlyFans OnlyFans. ...

Just opened up the statement for one of my credit cards: The one that I use for OnlyFans.  And, once again, the bill was several pages long, and about, oh, 90% of the charges were OF.

I have bought so many pictures and videos and subscriptions that OF could sneak in a phantom charge on me.  But I think they're all legit.

It is stark to see the extent of my porn obsession.  This long, for so many months?  I'm glad I have the money for it, but shoot, this is an expensive hobby.

There was talk a couple weeks ago about OF going legit and banning all sexually explicit content.  (Nudity, such as it is, would still be allowed, but drawing the line between "erotica," for lack of a better word, and pornography would be a difficult one.)  The company reversed its decision, but frankly, a part of me wished it "went legitimate" just like Patreon because that would mean I would buy less stuff and thus save more money.

But nope.  They're going to remain hardcore.  And I will continue to rack up the charges on my credit card.  Because I'm a porn addict.

Parents Being Penny Wise But Pound Foolish -- Maybe

I have come to eschew milk.  I may be overreacting, but all the times I have had an upset stomach over it have, in a small, prosaic way, traumatized me, and so unless the milk does not contain lactose (and I should talk to my doctor to confirm that, yes, I have lactose intolerance), I don't drink milk.

My Grandmother and parents made me drink so much milk.  I may have not felt well.  I may have told them about that.  They may have ignored me.  I had a traumatizing childhood, and I wonder if that was a part of it.

Anyway, over the weekend my folks bought four damn gallons of whole milk.  It was on sale.  Can you believe it?  "Drink up!" Father said, both last night and just now for lunch.  I don't think I can risk farting at my new job, Father.  To her credit, Mother stepped and told/reminded Father why I wouldn't drink it.

But: Four damn gallons.  Why?  Are they going to drink them all?  Do they expect me to pull my weight even though I try not to drink milk anymore?  Are my parents not lactose intolerant?  And does this fall under the adage of being penny wise but pound foolish?  Probably only if the milk goes to waste.

Eh.  I'll drink a glass tonight.  Hopefully it won't upset my stomach in the morning.

No Burger For Me

After having a hell of a full meal for dinner tonight, I decided I wanted -- well, needed -- to exercise.  But first, a burger from Bebe Zito.  Yes, a burger after this full meal for dinner.  I am a hypocrite.

The exit from 694W to 94E was closed.  I had to stop before I realized that there was a truck there.  Well, I didn't hear about any road construction there.  Whatever; I'll take a detour -- the next exit, then I'll come back on 694, and I'll reach 94E that way.

I do that and then I see something I've never seen before: A huge stretch of cars on the right lane, and no cars in the other lanes.  As I crept up, however, I saw there was a mess of cars on those lanes further up the highway.  Fuck me.  That truck was keeping more cars from piling onto 94E.  But I got on there anyway, and I got stuck as fuck for about half an hour.

I didn't want to use my data -- I don't think I have enough to last me the next eight days or so -- but I had to find out just what the hell happened.  Well, a shooting happened.  Someone got shot around the Dowling exit, so as police were investigating the crime scene, all traffic was diverted to the exit north of Dowling.  Of course The Fates conspired to deny me a burger.

I finally turned around and, in defeat, I went to exercise.  But not before getting ice cream from Culver's.  Because I went through a lot tonight.

New Work, So That's Always Scary

So I have a new assignment working the Gophers' Game Thursday.  I am ... more nervous than excited.  Excited because I am taking the entire Week off to work it -- there's nothing on Friday, but I decided I didn't want to go back to work for just one day -- something I last did for the Final Four.  Nervous, however, because I have not worked in such a capacity for college football.  Also, I looked through the book, and I don't recognize anybody from the Vikings side.  I hope they're good people.  But I e-mailed the guy who created the book and I haven't heard back from him yet.  Not a good sign.

The other thing about this assignment is because I am running, I have some really long hours.  I have worked these hours coming into work early for overtime, and there is presumably going to be a lot of downtime.  But I'll be there upwards of 12 hours, and there's no telling what could happen, in terms of run-ins with the people I'll have to work for or my energy level.

If nothing bad happens, this could open up more work for me.  I'd have to balance that with the Vikings stuff, I'm sure, but that might -- should -- be a good problem to have.  Of course, I need to get through the week without incident.

A Feeling Of Accomplishment (Such As It Is)!

OK, so today I woke up in the morning to watch EPL downtown.  Soccer is on an International Break next week, and then the NFL begins, so it might be the last time I do that for a while.

I wanted to take a nap.  Didn't think it was wise to do so where I was parked, so I drove all the way up to my storage unit.  I wasn't going into my unit, although I guess I could have taken my keys before I left, but I left in a hurry and didn't move my stuff from my pants to my shorts last night.  But really, I just went there so I would have a safe space in order to sleep.  And I may have done that for, like, half an hour, maybe, before the sun hit me in a way that woke me up.

And so I dithered.  I knew I was going to come home at some point to mow the lawn, and I would come home earlier than I usually would on a Saturday afternoon to do that because rain was coming.  Still, I really didn't want to come home.  But on my way to Potbelly because I was hungry to try one of their shakes (verdict: yummy!), I realized I could use a haircut.  So, I checked in online at Great Clips and had a more than half-hour wait, during which I was at Potbelly enjoying my shake.  I walked across the street, waited a little longer than I thought I should have (doesn't checking in online mean I can cut in front of the people who are there?), and was out between five and ten minutes after I sat in the barber's chair.

I told Father I'd be home between 2 and 3.  Usually I'd come back later than 3 in that case, but in this case, seeing as I got something done and I wanted to get this other thing done before the rain comes, I arrived back home a bit after 2.  I promptly put on my suntan lotion, made a couple calls while I waited for the oil to settle in, and finally started up the lawnmower just before 3.

And then the rain came.  Well, it was touch-and go.  The sky started to get cloudy, and then it got ominously cloudy, and then I felt a few raindrops after I got done with the front lawn.  I thought about packing it in, but when I popped my head into the backyard, not only did I see Father fiddling with the outside toaster oven on the deck, but I also saw Mother gardening.  If they were outside, I could be outside, so I went to mowing in the back as fast as possible -- without missing a blade of grass, of course.

And then the rain came again.  Sorta.  At one point it started to rain heavily.  But Mother was still out there.  And the sky didn't completely cloud over.  It did that thing where it would go dark and then lighten up, and the sun even peeked through a couple times.  If the sky was going to do that, well, what I was feeling was just instability showers, and so I was going to regret stopping mowing because the rain was going to stop, too.  So even at its worst, I kept mowing, hoping the engine wouldn't blow up.  And it didn't, and the rain stopped after about a minute, and I was able to mow the whole back lawn.

And I showered to get all my hair off of my head.  And after dinner I slept for two hours and 45 minutes.  And I am blogging for the second time today.  And yes, I feel like I accomplished things.

Me And Coconut Just Don't See Eye To Eye

Desperate for something I could drink late at night which wasn't pop, I ducked into Target last night to find some juice.  I know juice isn't that much better than Coke when it comes to added sugar, which is what I should be looking at avoiding.  But I had to have something, and for variety's sake, I picked up Tropicana Pina Colada "Drink."

I remember when Orange Julius was at the mall closest to me, before Dairy Queen dropped its pretense and shoved its products under the DQ umbrella (DQ bought OJ in 1987) and before the mall closed down its food court (presumably last year in the middle of the pandemic).  I don't know what compelled to try this "pina colada" thing, but the first time I tried it, I fell in love with it.  Every time I went to OJ, at the mall or anywhere else, I bought it, drank it, and floated on a cloud.

Memories like that floated in my mind when I reached in and grabbed the bottle.  I cracked it open tonight and drank it because after having a big Angry Orchard at Hooters (I ordered a small, but the Hooters waitress said they were out of clean pint glasses so she gave me a big one at a small's price), I got thirsty.

I was today years old when I had some idea of what goes into a pina colada.  Is it a mix of pineapple and coconut?  OK!  I don't think of myself as a fan of coconut, but it can't be all that bad if it helps make a pina colada taste so good.  So I filled up my dirty mug with the Tropicana and ... well, I'm not saying it's bad.  I mean, if I were thirsty as hell, and I was earlier in the evening, I would down it, no problem.  But, you know, I guess I'm not that big a fan of coconut.  In particular, I blame it and not the pineapple for the somewhat tinny aftertaste.  Maybe I expected to get a buzz of tequila from it or something, but I think this is one drink I'll drink quickly because I don't think I'm in love with it.

Yeah, I think it's the coconut.  Me and coconut just don't see eye to eye.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#0: Lynx (Last Week: -2).  On last Week's WMNSS, I described the two Games the Lynx had this screening Week as tough.  Well, they passed those two tough tests with flying colors, outlasting the Sky in Chicago Saturday, 101-95, then finally beating the Seattle Storm at home Tuesday, 76-70, on the back of Sylvia Fowles.  She became the first player in WNBA history to record at least 20 Points, 20 Rebounds, three Blocks and three Steals in the same Game.  And she was one Point short of being the first baller in league history to record a 30-Point Double-Double.  The Lynx needed every positive statistic Big Syl could get for them, but it's still satisfying to see them finally beat Seattle, a team that was playing all of its big stars (Sue Bird, Breanna Stewart, Jewell Lloyd).

Yet they remain in the fourth spot, just one Game ahead of Phoenix for a single bye in the playoffs.  They do catch a break, however, sorts, this Week, hosting two clubs far below them in the standings, New York and Los Angeles.

#-1: Gopher soccer (Last Week: 0).  A scoreless Tie at Robbie Stadium vs. Illinois-Chicago.  And all credit to the Flames, who took it to the Gophers and -- well, I guess they didn't earn a Point, but they didn't lose to a BcS squad.  (Not cool: My forearms getting sunburned because I failed to have the foresight to know I'd be sitting out in the midday sun and so I went without suntan lotion.  I'm so going to get skin cancer.)  They then went to their first road Game last/Thursday evening and beat Drake, 1-0, on a Penalty Kick made by Delaney Stekr, which was given due to a Bulldog handball from a U. cross.  I remember that last season's team (which, if you may recall, played from February to April of this Year) had a devil of a time scoring.  Well, two Goals in three Matches, one of which being a PK, isn't an established pattern, but it doesn't portend anything great, either.

This XI actually have the weekend off.  They next play Thursday at 1 in the afternoon versus Mississippi St. at home.  Why a weekday afternoon Kickoff?  The Gopher football team play Ohio St. at TCF Huntington Bank Stadium that evening.

#-2: United FC (Last Week: -3).  A second straight opportunity in which a player on the opposing side gets Red-Carded, only for said opportunity to go to waste, leading to a frustrating Draw.  It happened Saturday afternoon against Sporting Kansas City, whose Remi Walter was sent off in the 21st Minute (coincidentally the same Minute at which San Jose's Nathan Pelae Cardoso was thrown out of the Loons' previous Match) after he kicked Emanuel Reynoso in the right thigh with his studs.  So, they had about seventy Minutes of 11-on-10 football.  Did they score?  Nope.  And so this organization's historic inability to finish is kneecapping MNUFC's chances of doing anything special this Year.

That hit by Walter knocked Bebelo out of Wednesday's Major League Soccer All-Star Game.  It'll make him miss a road Match against Houston on Saturday, too.  But Reynoso will not be lonely; he is one of seven players right now who are too injured to play.  Robin Lod is among them.  He's the best player on the team when it comes to striking the ball.  (Note that I didn't call Lod a "Striker.")  That has led to idle speculation that the players get hurt because Head Coach Adrian Heath works them too hard at practice.  That and/or the inability to get his charge to find a different way to score is bringing back #HeathOut.

#-3: Twins (Last Week: -1).  After a good stretch in which it felt as though this club finally was showing the talent and incompetence we thought they would have going into the season -- no matter that it's much too late -- their Week going up against the traditional American League titans, the Yankees and the Red Sox, has been a disastrous one.  They were swept in the Bronx ... and it could have been worse, but the series' fourth Game on Sunday was rained out.  They then lost two-of-three in Fenway, and they were practically giving away the only victory they had in the Week: They were up on Boston 4-0 Wednesday evening -- a lead helped along by Miguel Sano, who hit a Home Run over the Green Monster 495 feet, the longest HR this season -- but Alex Colome, who has actually been decent as of late, coughed up a Blown Save in a second consecutive Game.  Josh Donaldson helped Colome get the Win (baseball for ya) with a two-Run Home Run in the top of the 10th Inning; Jake Cave put the Twinks out in front for good with a three-Run blast later that Inning.  An exciting 9-6 victory ... but a more competent group would not have let the Red Legs tie the Game.

Oh, and Willians Astudillo hit a two-Run Homer off the top of the Monster in last/Thursday night's tilt.  Those were the only Runs the Twinks scored last night; they got destroyed, 12-2.  Since the contest got out of hand, La Tortuga made another appearance pitching; he walked one but allowed no Hits nor Runs in one Inning.  And he has an ERA of 2.25 ... which, tweeted by Aaron Gleeman of The Athletic, is better than the ERAs of all but four of the players who have pitched for the Twinks this Year.  That's the 2021 squad in a nutshell.

This screening Week they're all over the place: They host the Brewers this weekend for three, then they have to fly out to Detroit to play a Game that was rained out July 16 Monday afternoon.  Really -- these two sorry teams have to make up a Game?  Then they come back to Target Field for one of those weird midweek duos, this time against the Chicago Cubs.

Went to a stripper party last/Wednesday night, where I got talked into a three-way.  Glad I had the money to pull it off.  But I gotta tell ya, the more I do these, the more I am unable to perform.  In fact, I have no idea if I got inside one of the girls.  If I were the man I was twenty years ago, I would have been rock-hard and rockin' in both those babes.  Now ... I'm glad for the experience of being double-teamed (again), but if I can't stay erect nor cum, I might as well stop going to these parties.  Just pack it in, retire, prepare for my death.

Should I Go To The Fair?

In case you haven't heard, the Minnesota State Fair is not mandating the use of masks for fairgoers.  However, they are "strongly encouraging" its use.  In a press release, they are, and I quote, "urging [fairgoers] to pitch in and do what's right."  Such a Minnesotan thing to say.  And so people are hammering the Fair for such a folksy way of dealing with people who won't mask up.  And rightly so.

And yet, on the eve of the Fair, I bought a ticket at Cub Foods.  I bought another one back on Sunday.  Why?  Man, I don't know.  I want to believe the science ... which says that if you're vaccinated (and I am), you're virtually immune from COVID-19, even its Delta variant, hospitalizing and/or killing you ... and which also says that Delta spreads very easily and efficiently ... and has sent people to the ICU and onto a ventilator ... most of which being the unvaccinated ... and which also says that the coronavirus has trouble spreading outdoors ... but easily spreads in crowds.  So yeah, I don't know.  This information is not mixed messaging; it's science.

Look, I don't want to be an anti-vaxxer and anti-masker, so any squawking coming from them should fall on deaf ears because those pricks never debate in bad faith.  (People should vandalize the Republican booth at the Fair, too.)  But there is a possibility, a slight possibility, that people are overreacting to the Fair's decision, which, to be fair (see what I did there?), may not be based on science so much as on logistics (namely that it's too hard to tell everybody coming onto the Fairgrounds to wear a mask).  Upon this news that came down last week, many media outlets, 150 vendors and at least one band has decided not to appear at the Fair, although many vendors cite staffing shortages and lack of supplies as reasons they won't show up.

But how about me?  I missed the Fair last year.  I have grown to see the Fair as a pilgrimage -- maybe not Mecca, more like Graceland.  Yet I don't want to get sick because some outstate dumbass still thinks the virus is a hoax.

But ... you know, I thought that once I got the vaccine I would not need to get tested for COVID-19.  With the spread of the Delta variant and the unknown ability for it to infect the fully vaccinated, however, I decided I could not be free of it.  My parents seem healthy, but if I still am able to spread it to them because I was in a situation where I somehow caught it, I would have to know if I get it.  And yet I have largely gone back to my normal social routine -- exercising, going out to eat, having fun at stripper parties, etc.  I got tested back on Saturday; it came back negative.  And, yes, I am kind of committed since I bought two tickets.

Yes.  I am going.  I am going to try to be as careful as hell.  I'll try -- try -- to wear a mask whenever I'm not eating or drinking, which is inimical to being at the Fair, I understand that.  I probably won't go in any indoor spaces.  I may not even use the restroom.  And I won't stay long.  Hopefully.  I promise.

What I will do, however, is not go the first week.  I'm not as worried about sudden cases of the 'Rona happening with people infected the first days of the Fair, although if Delta spreads as fast as I hear, I will hear about a sudden rise in cases in the state this time next week.  I am more concerned about incidents between people over the use or non-use of masks.  I'm really scared that, frankly, there are going to be arguments, if not fistfights, over someone using or not using a mask.  If those things happen, they're going to happen through the weekend.  If my fears are unfounded (and I hope they are), I think I can step onto the Fairgrounds its second week.  If, however, the Fair is just riven with id-crazy Republican psychos who are making fun of anybody wearing a mask ... well, I guess I wasted $26.

Wish me luck.

No, Mother Nature, You Can't Do That

This morning I drove to work through a torrential downpour, first time I've done that this year, and maybe in a while.  It was black as night through much of the morning.  No way I thought the meteorologists could be right last night in saying we could have sun by the afternoon -- right?

But dammit, the clouds thinned and in the afternoon, the sun poked through.  Seriously, the weather and sky and Mother Nature can't do that.  You're either giving us a thunderstorm or sun.  You cannot give us both types of weather on the same bleepin' day.  That ain't right.

Killing Two (Or More) Birds With One Stone

Had a call-in session with my shrink today.  It was after work, and since I came in Sunday evening to work some overtime, I saw that I would be filling in for someone who works a half-hour earlier than me, so I could move up the tele-session by a half-hour.  And yet, because of some driver who went over two or three lanes to take the cloverleaf ramp from one highway to another right in front of me, I tried keeping up with her, accelerating and decelerating at dangerous speeds very close to other cars.  Sadly, I couldn't keep up with her (and I only say her because a decal, "You just got passed by a girl!" set me off).  Alas, road rage insults inflicted on me by fast, dangerous cars go unanswered by me because of slow cars ... well, slower; they're the ones obeying the speed limit, not me, or that chick.

But I got to the grocery fast enough where, after I purchased food and a Coke, I made it to the parking lot and I wasn't too late to receive the call from my therapist.  Turns out, driving that fast did get me to almost on time with him, but I could just be rationalizing my bad driving, driving that seemed to have taken some miles off of my car's transmission.  It's been going funny ever since, I think.

It's that aggression, one that may or may not have been intentional by that other car, that was my first subject with my psychologist.  I then went to talking about the other passive-aggressive dudes I ran into at work.  At the end of the hour, my therapist asked me to reflect on these run-ins as well as my aggressive driving before the call and try to delve into why I did those things.  He noticed an "irritation" in me, and he thought that I have had a negative reaction to those dealings not because of something deriving from those dealings themselves, but rather they're a connection to either something else at work or something at home.

I have done a little reflection, and although I could be wrong, I think I know what it is: My sudden weight gain.  I talked about it at a glance here, but I'll rehash it: On Friday, I went to a screening that my company uses to, fingers crossed, give me the cheapest insurance rates.  I go through the whole metric rigmarole -- blood panel, blood pressure, height.  And then I weighed myself, and by God, I am the heaviest I have ever seen myself on a scale.  It didn't help that I went to see Black Widow and got a popcorn and large Coke (that came free!), then went to the Gopher soccer Match and got a hot dog and a medium-sized Coke.  I went online at work Sunday night and checked past screenings: My weight, and thus my Body Mass Index, was much more manageable the previous two years, and that includes one in the thick of the pandemic, when no one was doing anything except stay home and eat.

Ever since I could feel the weight around my waistline -- which, by the way, according to the quick but not customer-friendly tech who took all my measurements, is at a record 38 inches -- and I have been obsessed with, and enslaved by, my rotundity.  That deluxe sandwich, with several slices of deli meats packed into two delicious pieces of bread?  I was throwing the wrapper away while speaking to my doctor.  The trash can was across the parking lot.  I walked over there, and every step I took I felt my belly shifting to and fro.  I was mentally adding "doooonk, doooonk" sounds in my head as I sauntered.

I think getting fat has been really weighing on my mind.  And as I noted in the blog post linked above and linked here, I have been meaning to work out, but I haven't had the time.  Last night, for example, I was going to a stripper party to get wanked, and maybe more, by this woman I have been in contact with for several years now without having any intimate contact.

But maybe there was divine intervention that has steered me in the right direction.  By the time I got there, yesterday evening, it looked like it was cancelled.  While I drove slowly down the street and saw the house, I saw a guy get out and walk up to the side door.  When I came back to park, he was already going back to his car.  We locked eyes in a way two whoremongers could identify each other.  He started the car and drove my way, but when he got up to my parked car, he stopped and told me no one was there.  Must've all cut the party short or something.  Thanks, fellow strippermonger.

I texted the host who invited me and drove off.  I literally had my best laid plans ruined, so now what?  I thought I could go to Target to buy some creamer, then walk around a park somewhere ... but ... it then hit me ... why not go to the gym?  Sure, I wasn't wearing any underwear, but that's a small price to pay for trying to burn off some calories and jump-starting your metabolism!

So even though I had to drive 13-4 miles in a car I don't quite trust nowadays, I put in about 75 minutes on the elliptical, the yoga mat, and the bike.  Four-hundred eighty-eight calories used, according to the displays.  I don't know if I have made a dent on my belly at all.  But I like to think that any exercise is good.  More importantly, right now I feel as though I have finally done a good thing to get in shape.  Mentally thinking I am doing the right thing for myself has done wonders for my psyche, and it has lightened my mood.

So, maybe this is the projection my psychotherapist has been talking about.  Maybe my frustration over my weight gain has been the reason I tried to race that crappy car, and why I take such umbrage and these worker's micro-aggressions.  I didn't get a piece of ass, but I finally was able to exercise and lift a self-imposed mental burden off my head.  And I got to save a lot of money.  Sounds like a win-win-win to me.

Now to wean myself off of pop and other added sugars. ...

Hottest Babe In The Hooters Calendar: July

As Hooters usually does for July, most of the women are dressed up in red, white and blue.  There are a lot of star patterns, however, four to be exact, and I don't think I've ever seen so many for a July spread before.

There are ten babes for the month.  Three of them have their arms in front of their bodies, therefore I am eliminating them from recognition here.  I don't have too much time to rank the rest, so after several look-overs, I am going to rank them like this, in ascending order:

7) Cassidy, Grand Prairie (spelled "Praire" -- when I think Hooters, I don't think spelling), Tex.  Long brown hair, bandeau top, red two-piece bikini.  She's tanned as fuck, but the muted expression gets her on the list, but no more.

6) Victoria, Metairie, La.  Long, stark blonde hair, and she's wearing a star bikini, namely white stars on a blue two-piece with red borders.  She smiles lovingly.  Unfortunately (and this is petty, even for something as misogynistic as "Hottest Babe In The Hooters Calendar") she is one of three waitresses here that have the smallest picture in this spread, and that knocks her down to here.

5) Vanessa, West Palm Beach, Fla.  Very long brown hair, red two-piece with a small white "X" on the top of the left breast, tanned skin, but a non-smile.  You can tell that her breasts, natural or not, are huge, which is a plus.  Her bikini is one of those high-waisted, 80's types, a plus in my book.

4) Carsyn, Beaumont, Tex.  A white two-piece that looks more like sleepwear than beachwear.  She's a little small on top, too.  But she's got long blonde hair, got a sexy stomach (yes, there is such a thing), and a smile that beams like a lighthouse.  A cutie!

3) Grayson, Kennesaw, Ga.  The Main Girl for July 2021.  Another star bikini, this one with a plethora of differently-colored stars on a white two-piece bikini.  Breasts are good.  Good proportion.  It's a muted smile, but I like it.  And I really like the short blonde cut.  Her right hand is touching the right strap of her bikini top, but all her good qualities make up for it and then some.

2) Alyssa, Denham Springs, La.  So she has long, darker blonde hair, she's not really smiling, and her blue two-piece has a lot of material and thus covers a lot of stuff.  That's fine, because I can make out a ... #-pack on her abs, and I am so fucking turned on by a hot woman who has a strong core.  And I'm not ashamed, dammit!

1) Danielle, Sarasota, Fla.  The blonde (yes, her hair is long) is in side profile, and she's sorta throwing back her hair.  She ain't really smiling, either, and she's got an American flag bikini going on: White stars on a blue bikini top, red-and-white vertical stripes for a bottom.  The reason she's #1 is because she fulfills my new rule, namely that if you show ass, you're going to be at the top.  It ain't that revealing -- half of her ass, maybe less -- but Hooters is still treading on taboo ground here, so I'll give the top spot to continue to motivate Hooters to shoot more in this vein.

So congratulations to Danielle on topping a really good month!  And yes, I will eventually masturbate to all these babes as soon as I have the time.

Addendum To: It's Like I'm Getting Cockblocked From Exercising

So that Zoom meeting I had last night, the one I organized, the one that prevented me from going to the gym?  Yeah, no one showed up.  I was afraid this was going to happen the first time I organized a Zoom, two Zooms ago, but people showed up the last two, so I thought there'd be at least one other person who'd drop in last night.  But noooooooooooooooo.  I waited, I watched Liga MX, I started putting away my dry clothes, and no one came.  At around a quarter to 9, 15 minutes before my announced closing time, I shut it off.

Not that I'm mad or anything.

Micro-Aggression Motherfuckers

OK, so there's a supervisor at work who refuses to move when I need him to.  But there's another guy, who I had the displeasure of being in the same station with on Thursday, who really bothers me.  He gave me a suggestion as to how to cut something open, to which I replied, "Oh, (supervisor) told me to do it that way," to which he replied, "I'm just telling ya an easier way of opening it."  Man, don't take it personal, dude!  But apparently he wants to be more defensive than me, and no can do that.  Later, he threw a package back at me because I didn't cut it well enough.  I guess I didn't, but man, what a bitch to tell me to cut it again.

Who the fuck is this asshole?  I've never seen him before, but he's acting like a mix of a brat and an incel.  He's the type of prick who, if he gets fired, would totally come back to work with his arsenal of guns, ready to kill everyone who has crossed him -- me included.

That's another reason why I've elected to go in and work (if I have the energy to, actually) in the evening instead of the morning or afternoon.  If I'm right -- and knowing my luck I could totally be wrong -- no one I know will be there.  So, no asshole supervisor and no prickly prick.  I'll put my guard up for Monday, when they both may be working.

It's Like I'm Getting Cockblocked From Exercising

The sad truth came at my assessment yesterday: I am as overweight as I have ever been.  I could blame all the food Father packs for me to work and Mother makes for all of us for dinner.  And I do.  But drinking so much pop and ice cream really doesn't help.  And having a regular popcorn (which is oversized) and a large Coke as I watched Black Widow at the movies, then followed that up with a hot dog and another Coke for the Gopher soccer Game afterward (Minnesota beats Baylor, 1-0!) the day before the assessment really, really doesn't help.

Right now I am going through the guilt phase I usually feel after these assessments and yearly doctor's checkups.  I haven't touched a Coke since Thursday evening; let's see how long that lasts.  But I also want -- well, need -- to exercise, and I truly am embarrassed to say that I haven't done that in over a week.

I knew I should have, and wouldn't, in the week leading up to the assessment.  I went to see the St. Paul Saints with a friend on Tuesday.  There was the Game (and visit to a strip club; I was able to fit in the movie because work got me to come in and thus leave early that day) on Thursday.  And I don't want to go out more than two evenings a week because I want to sleep in.  Yesterday/Friday would have been the night to work out, but there was a threat of storms that was supposed to start smack dab in the middle of the evening, plus it was humid as hell out there, so I decided not to go.  I don't think the weather was that bad all night.

So, how 'bout the weekend?  I could have fit in a workout this/Saturday afternoon, inbetween watching EPL at Brit's and coming home to clean my room, which is what My Fucking Father told me to do when I left this morning, fuck him.  But a Bloody Mary-induced nap in both the much more pleasant weather and the parking lot of Grandmother's friend who I visited eliminated that possibility.  I would have worked out tonight, also known as now, but I set up this Zoom thing and I have to stick around for that, and I hate how I set up my own bad timing.

Tomorrow?  I could go in the morning.  Nah, I'll sleep in.  The Gopher soccer club plays Illinois-Chicago in the afternoon.  There is Sunday night; I think the gym is now open on Sundays.  But then, out of the blue, there is work that has been offered.  Yeah, just before I walked into Brit's, I get a text message from my boss saying that we could come in today -- like, right then and there -- for overtime.  It wasn't offered all week, but somehow, I guess there were people who weren't working, or something?  I want to jump at the chance for OT, but not when it's for immediate help.  I have plans, you know?  But later, while visiting Grandmother's friend, I get another, more germane text from him opening up overtime for the weekend.  So, working out or work Sunday night?  Shit; the exercise room will still be there come Monday, but the work may not.  So work, dammit, it will be.

And I can't work Monday because I have a house party to go to Monday.  And I've got another one Wednesday.  And that's my two days.  Well, I have a different schedule Thursday and Friday, so I guess I can finally work out then.  Maybe?

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#0: Gopher soccer (Re-Entry!).  I have no idea how good this squad is supposed to be this Year (although not receiving any votes in one preseason poll should be a good indication).  But I'm going to be generous and lift the U. "footballers" above negative numbers after witnessing them start off the 2021 season with a 1-0 victory over Baylor last/Thursday night.  The U. had the run of play early in the Match, and they cashed in with an open rebound by Sophia Boman off a breakaway.  The Game tightened up after that; the Bears outshot the Gophers, 7-6 (even though the U. had four Shots On Goal while Baylor had only two), but that Sixth Minute punch-in stood, giving new Head Coach Erin Chastain (One Of Us!  And sister-in-law to Brandi Chastain!) her first win in maroon and gold.

I always look forward to U. teams playing non-conference foes, so I'll be at Robbie Stadium at least once more.  That includes Illinois-Chicago, who come to Cleveland Avenue for a Game Sunday afternoon.  Then, the Gophs head down to Des Moines to play Drake on Thursday.

#-1: Twins (Last Week: 0).  The screening Week was spoiled last/Thursday night with an all-too-predictable 7-5 loss to the fucking Yankees in the Bronx; goddamn dom/sub relationship working again.  With that exception, this ballclub is playing very well right now.  Their 4-3 record includes series wins over Tampa Bay and Cleveland, which runs that streak of series wins to four.  Also, by taking two-of-three at home vs. the Bay Rays completed a streak of series wins over the teams leading the American League West (Houston), the A. L. Central (the Chicago White Sox), and the A. L. East (Tampa).

And we have to note the incredible hot streak of Jorge Polanco.  The Twins' last three Games were won on the last at-bat by Hip-Hip Jorge.  Here's the one that won the contest against Cleveland on Wednesday, Polanco's fifth Game-ender (I hate the term "walkoff"):

We could have used this production back in April and May.  But it's good to see a veteran play like we have seen him play before.

After completing the four-Game series against the Yanks, they'll play in Boston beginning on Tuesday.

#-2: Lynx (Re-Entry!).  And now we go to two squads that had their long successful streaks come to an end this Week.  Let us start with the team that did win this Week, the Lynx.  They (and the WNBA) returned from a five-Week break for the Olympics with an 88-78 win over New York Sunday, extending their winning streak to eight.  But that streak has been utterly vaporized with a two-Game road sweep in Connecticut, a team that seems to be dialed in and now tie Las Vegas for the best record in the league.  People who follow the team and the league knew Minnesota was not a favorite to be champs.  I don't know if the casual Minnesota sports fan knows that, however, and would thus be disappointed once the club falls short of the title again this Year.

Two tough Games this screening Week: At Chicago Saturday night, hosting Seattle Tuesday evening.

#-3: United FC (Last Week: Positive Numbers).  The Loons' five-Match unbeaten streak (three wins, two ties) was snapped with a 1-0 home loss to the Los Angeles Galaxy Saturday (glad I didn't go to this Game, although I still have some enduring loyalty because the Galaxy was my team when Major League Soccer started), which was then followed up Tuesday with a 1-all road draw versus San Jose, a side whose number MNUFC usually has, where the Earthquakes had one man sent off in the 21st Minute and, after Will Trapp tied up the Match one Minute later, wasn't (at least according to those who watched and/or listened to the whole Game) even close to getting the Match-winning Goal.

This shows, somehow, the gaping hole that erupts with the loss of ... Robin Lod?  Yes, apparently his finishing skill has become indispensable to United FC's attack.  With, say, Adrien Hunou's candle burning out fast, it has become apparent that Lod as a False 9 is now this XI's solid tip of the spear.  With Lod injured, how are these guys going to score?  And if they're not, when is Lod coming back?

They host Sporting Kansas City Saturday afternoon, broadcast on ESPN.

Upcoming Changes To The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey: The St. Thomas Dilemma, AKA A Dark Night Of The Soul

There will ... well, may ... be changes to The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey.  It may come as soon as tomorrow.

As you may know, the University of St. Thomas received permission from the NCAA to jump classifications for its sports from Division III to Division I.  That unprecedent move was spurred on (possibly in part, probably in total) by the similarly unprecedented move by the Minnesota Intercollegiate Athletics Conference (MIAC) to kick out the Tommies out of the conference.  The other 13 schools expelled St. Thomas because its teams, especially the football team, was beating the shit out of them on a regular basis.  I would have said that the other schools just need to play better, or get more money in order to fund the infrastructure in order to get better.  They decided to expel instead.  And according to this article, it was not UST's idea to make the jump, but the Commission of The Summit League.

Anyway, this fall -- and actually this week, starting, as usual, with women's soccer -- St. Thomas starts its athletic life as a top-flight school.  Not counting men's and women's hockey (and in The State Of Hockey, you never should), UST is now the second Division I university in Minnesota, joining, well, the U.  Till now, Minnesota was one of only five states to have one and only one top-flight college.

The others, by the way: Hawai'i, Maine, Vermont and Wyoming.  (Though Alaska-Fairbanks still has a men's hockey team, since it is hockey, I'm guessing it doesn't count, so Alaska actually has no Division I schools.)  Now put up Minnesota against those four (and maybe even five) other states.  "One of these things is not like the others" on steroids, am I right?  Minnesota has a huge urban center and the 16th largest metropolitan area in the United States.  A population magnet like that has to have a second Division-I school, right?

Wrong.  Well, at least until now.  St. Thomas is a shoefly in terms of enrollment, but in all other factors (endowment, alumni base, athletics success), they have enough things going for them to say that they deserve to be Division I.  That commish of the Summit thinks so, too.

But in elevating to top-flight I am sincerely and acutely ... heartbroken.  I will be perfectly frank: I am very sad and kind of lost now that The Gopher State will now have a second Division I university.  It's not as if I have been bereft of, well, "choices" when it comes to rooting for college teams.  All my life it's been the University of Minnesota.  I was aware that the state is "weird" when it comes to hockey, but if you wanted big-time football and basketball, Heisman winners and March Madness champions and draft picks you'll see play in the NFL and NBA, you would see them because they would be playing the Golden Gophers.  There was no other option.  And that was OK, because ... well, because it's always been that way, we've been conditioned to look through college athletics though a maroon-and-gold lens, and not having a second university to root for wasn't a hole in my sports heart.  Other states have a multitude of colleges to root for, but Minnesota worked just fine with only one such school.

The day when we would have a second probably was an inevitability.  A state this big, this populated and this urbane would have to have another college in top-flight athletics.  It does help with variety, however, and St. Thomas serves as a unique contrast (if not antagonist) to the U. because they are the opposite of the U. in a lot of ways: private instead of public; religious (St. Thomas is a Catholic school) vs. secular; mid-major vs. BcS; new vs. old.  And yet I am kind of sad the first time a team for the Tommies has a better in-season record that the counterpart at Dinkytown.  Even though I had no other choice, the U. was my college team.  But I was neither bereft nor lacking.  So, honestly, I see the Tommies as an interloper, an upstart, maybe even an impostor.  And I'm afraid the comparisons the U. will now have to face, especially when they have an underachieving team, will now be a regular part of their public relations.

---

When I began the WMNSS, my main goal was to rank all the teams originating in the Twin Cities that play at the highest level of competition for their sport.  There are still legitimate questions as to how faithfully I hew to that standard.  For example, would I really rank the Gopher basketball team when there's the Timberwolves?  Jokes about how butt the Wolves have been most of their existence aside, fair point.  I rationalize it away by thinking that college basketball is so popular in its own right that it is its own "sport."  That allows me to believe that the Twin Cities-based college basketball team deserves to be on the survey as much as the Twin Cities-based professional basketball team does.

But two college basketball teams?  I can't hand-wave that away.  No, St. Thomas isn't entering the Big Ten; most of its teams will be part of The Summit.  (Exceptions: Football is in the Pioneer League, men's hockey in the CCHA, and women's hockey in the WCHA alongside the U. and the four other top-flight hockey programs in Minnesota.)  But most of the programs are Division I, aka top-flight.  And I am not going to write about both, say, Minnesota and St. Thomas men's hockey teams every Week.  The survey is already long many Months of the Year and I have other things I need to do.

Therefore, I have come to the conclusion that if St. Thomas has a program that Minnesota has, I will not write about either team.  Yes, this is a radical step.  But it is too much for me to follow, oh, a dozen new programs throughout the college calendar, even if it means that entire sports will not be followed from now on.  I just don't know how else to decide without devoting more Hours to this than I already do.

There are exceptions, sports where I still identify only one team playing at the highest level of competition for its sport:

• As of right now, Minnesota has a wrestling team and St. Thomas doesn't.  So, there is only one Twin Cities-based top-flight college wrestling program.  Gopher wrestling stays on the survey.
• I didn't realize that it goes the other way, too.  The Tommies have a men's soccer team and the Gophers don't.  So, there is only one Twin Cities-based top-flight men's soccer program.  Welcome, Tommies men's soccer, to The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey!  Well, not yet; see below.
• Yes, technically St. Thomas football is in Division I.  But the NCAA (actually its member schools) long ago made classifications within Div. I.  Division 1-A, now designated as FBS, consists of the biggest schools doling out the most scholarships.  Division 1-AA, now designated as FCS, consists of the schools that give out, I believe, 22 fewer scholarships.  Also, way fewer people care about them.  There are enough distinctions between FBS and FCS to make me think that they're not on the same level.  Simply put, the U. has clear advantages over St. Thomas, no matter how dominant the Tommies were over MIAC competition.  So I will continue to follow Gopher football and disregard Tommie football.  Think of it as following the Twins but not the St. Paul Saints; not a great analogy because St. Thomas players don't get "called up" to the U., but I think you know what I mean.

But basketball?  Hockey?  Volleyball and baseball and softball?  Sorry, but they'll be gone.  There are two of them, and therefore I will not follow either of them.  It's a time issue, plus I just cannot get around the fact there are now two of many top-flight college teams in Minneapolis-St. Paul.  That's where I draw the line.

At least for now.  Despite the unprecedented jump, St. Thomas programs still have to undergo a four-Year provisional period, meaning no Tommies team can play in the postseason until the 2025-6 school season.  There is no tangible connection from that rule to the survey, but I will keep surveying Gopher and only Gopher teams from the college ranks until then.  That gives me time to think if I even want to go through with the decisions I laid out above.  I may stick to it.  I may decide to not follow St. Thomas teams at all and keep going with the WMNSS as it always has been.  I may decide to go through with these eliminations starting this Year.  Who knows?

All I can tell you is that when I make my decision, I'll let you know.  This is just really strange, man, and I'm still figuring out how I feel about all this.

The Ceiling Fans At Work

Man, I know I started this shit, but damn, she's fucking annoying the shit out of me again. ...

It gets hot in the hallway.  Once again, the weather outside is warming up, so yesterday morning, I noticed that the ceiling fans were shut off.  I turned them on.  Now, I thought about asking the other people whether they were OK with me turning them on.  But every single one of them (and there were four people who work under the fans and so would feel them when I turn them on) were focused on their work and had headphones on.  I took that as a sign to not bother them.  So I went to the end of the hallway and flipped the switch that turned on both ceiling fans.

Do you remember me talking about Miss I Did Lotsa Folders?  She was at the scanner yesterday morning, and while I was looking in her direction, she flipped off the switch that turned off both ceiling fans.  Fuck.  Me.

Again, I will take responsibility because I did not ask her if it's OK for me to turn them on.  Also, she was intent on doing her job, and I did my best to slink around her to get to the switch, so it was possible she didn't see me turn them on.  Or ... maybe she did.

Anyway, I kind of got apoplectic.  That Girl who fooled me into thinking she was smart only because she is quiet has a bitch of a passive-aggressive streak.  Well, the only way to bust through that is direct confrontation ... which probably wasn't needed if I just asked her beforehand.

But I went up to her and asked her, "I'm sorry -- did you not want me to turn on the ceiling fans?"  To which she replied, "Ope!  No, that's OK!" and she turned them on herself.

Now, I will allow the possibility that I'm making a mountain out of a molehill.  And I have to go back to confessing once again that I probably started all this.  But let's be real here: She wouldn't have turned off the ceiling fans if she didn't want them off.  So why did she turn them back on?  For me?  If she didn't want them on, she could have just told me.  So, yes, her just turning them back on and essentially saying, "Oh, excuuuuuuuuse me!" is a very passive-aggressive way of telling me she hated what I did -- and that she may not like me, period.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.  For now.

I could've gotten the fuck away from That Girl by taking second shift for seven straight days.  But no, I had plans and I have training.  (Oh, by the way, my co-worker really does have a valid reason for asking for all those days off a mere week in advance: A family member died.  Totally understandable.  My misperception.)

I'm out in The Main Department until next week.  I don't know if I can last that long being around That Girl.

FAIL!

I had to re-do this online safety course for my sports gig job.  Actually, it's one of three.  These are boring, of course, and they're long, too.

I picked the one that, somehow, was the shortest of the three -- ten minutes instead of half an hour.  But with all these courses, there is a quiz, and you have to get so much in order to pass.

They're usually easy.  But dammit, I had this ten-question quiz at the end, I got two wrong -- just two, man -- and this goddamn quiz demanded a perfect score to pass.  I didn't ... and it looks like I have to take the whole shitty course all over again.  Are you fucking kidding me?!?!?!  I wasted ten minutes for this bullshit?!?!?!

So now I'm taking another course.  This one's thirty minutes long.  I don't have time for this shit.  Hope I pass, for fuck's sake.

So I text ****e out of the blue because I have Friday off and I had originally planned to see and fuck her.  And, for the first time in almost three months, she texted back -- "hi."  And I was surprised!  But I texted her back, "How are you?  It's been so long!  What happened?" and ... she hasn't texted me back yet.  I think that I could have elicited another text if I had replied to her immediately, and not after 40 minutes.  When I texted, I plugged my phone into the charger because I didn't think she would immediately reply.  I hope she just went to bed early.

Addendum To: The Cost Of My MNUFC Switcheroos

Oh yeah, and about the Match I went to ...

I don't take back what I said about the perspective of my seat, or the atmosphere I have missed so much.  The former was fantastic (and makes me sad that I can't afford such a seat -- and that brings me to my aside: I sat next to the two people who sold the ticket.  They're in a group of three, and their third member couldn't make it that night.  They have to pay $80 a month for those seats.  I don't know if I want to do that) and the latter lifts my heart.

However ... I bought this "second" seat because I was scared as hell that my "first" seat was going to roast me in the summer sun, and I wanted at least one seat in the shaded, "rich" side, just to see how The Other Half lives.  Well, it turns out it was mostly cloudy that day.  There was a chance of rain, in fact, but the temperature was low enough whereby the humidity from the soupy air wasn't making me perspire.  In other words, I would have been OK with just keeping my "first" seat.  Possibly better; I would have been farther away, but I would have been lined up directly at the Halfline, and I would have a bird's-eye view of the entire pitch.  And, of course, I wouldn't have thrown away (if I'm doing the math right according to the costs I listed in my previous blog post) $59 for buying and then selling it.

I hate when I guess wrong.

The Cost Of My MNUFC Switcheroos

So I promised I would break down and compute the total cost I spent for buying one ticket to the Loons Match vs. Houston, deciding to sell that, then spending more money on another ticket.

• Buying first ticket: $77 (I used my built-up credit to pay for it, but still)
• Selling said ticket: $18
• Buying second ticket: $51.25
• Total: $110.25

Geez.

Might as well get specific numbers for the Game versus San Jose, one I did not go to.  I estimated I wasted forty bucks, but did I?

• Bought ticket: $81
• Sold ticket: $36
• Total: $45

Woof.

So I wasted $155.25 to buy a sell tickets to two Games when I eventually went to only one?  Stupid me.

So I really have nothing to say right now except that even though it's been relatively dry (as in not humid) the past several days, it feels muggy to me.  Yes, I've been up and about outside today, including George Floyd Square and my yard to mow.  And it's hot!  And humid!  Oy.

I'm going to sweat more later because I plan on working out.  Yes, even after mowing the lawn.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

Positive Numbers: United FC (Last Week: 0).  I'm being an absolute softie this Week.  And a homer, too.  Partly it's because this will be the last time till maybe the holidays where the WMNSS is only two teams long.  But it's also because I went to the Loons' only match this screening Week.

I opted out of this season after being forcibly opted out last season.  Still, money was taken out of my account for much of the ticket for this season.  Since I opted out, I could use the money that I had already paid into next year's season ticket which I and my ticket representative assume will return to normal with full attendance allowed for all 18 or so Matches.  With that being said, I could still buy single tickets for the rest of this Year; I could even use the credit in my account for it.  And so I did.  Well, I did use my credit for a ticket to Saturday's Match vs. Houston, but then I decided I wanted to switch seats and so I bought another one and charged it to my credit card and ... you know, I think this long story needs its own blog post.

Anyway, on Saturday I went to Allianz Field for the first (and possibly last and only) time this season, and for the first time in almost two months.  It was sold out.  And I have to say that I think MNUFC are playing really well now.  A muffed save meant a loose ball that Robin Lod deposited into the net in the First Half, and I saw it right in front of me from the (new) seat I bought just for this Game, and it was absolutely glorious to see it.  Brent Kallman, of all people, headed in a Bebelo Reynoso Corner Kick in the second to ice the Game over the Dynamo.  And yes, they played "Wonderwall."

It was nice to be in the middle of a lot of other people watching a sporting event.  And it was especially invigorating to see The Nest packed with 18,000+ people going nuts when the Loons scored.  Saturday was great because my team won.  But it was more meaningful to be reminded why I became a season-ticketholder in the first place.

They host the Los Angeles Galaxy Saturday.  I still want to go, but the prices are just too damn high.  The club then go to San Jose for a rare Tuesday tilt.

#0: Twins (Last Week: -1).  I usually don't lift a squad that went 4-2 for the Week up above negative numbers.  But like I said, I'm being a pushover this Week.  Also, note that the Twins' opponents were the Houston Astros (against whom they won three-of-four, and in H-Town, no less) and the Chicago White Sox, both of which are in first place in the A. L. West and A. L. Central, respectively.  What I say may be meaningless in a season that has fallen well short of expectations, but I'll say it anyway: This probably was the best Week the Minnesota Twins have had since April.

In last Week's Survey, I delved into the Jose Berrios trade and I forgot to quickly break down the two other trades the organization made just before the Trade Deadline, because in their own ways they were feats of magic.  Neither J. A. Happ nor Hansel Robles were having great seasons with the "TC."  And yet the Twins were able to pawn them off, to St. Louis and Boston, respectively.  The minor leaguers they got in turn were negligible.  But there is something to be said about dealing away players that have underachieved for you.  It is, in a way, addition by subtraction.

Meanwhile, with fewer veterans around and nothing else to play for, the Twinks basically are developing players more than the St. Paul Saints are.  And for this Week, at least, the results have been promising when it comes to Starting Pitching, at least when it came to the midweek series versus the Pale Hose.  Beau Burrows was the opening/bull Pitcher for Monday's opener, and I don't think he, who was picked up in late June after being waived by Detroit, lasted two Innings; the Twinks lost, 11-1.  But Griffin Jax struck out ten White Sox on Tuesday, and Bailey Ober held down the fort Wednesday.  Both resulted in one-Run Wins for the good guys.

Aaron Gleeman of The Athletic highlighted the next crop of promising Twins pitching prospects that are at AAA St. Paul or AA Wichita, and are on the verge of being called up either next Year or 2023.  Jax and Ober, both of whom have spent time in the organization, are among those Gleeman highlighted.  Another is Simeon Woods-Richardson, the blue-chipper the Twins got from Toronto in exchange for Berrios.  If what we saw this workweek is the start of something big, well, maybe trading Berrios this Year was a good thing, because the Twins would then have a bumper crop of live arms for the rotation and the bullpen.

OK, I'm now a little more optimistic about this ballclub.  And I am getting more enthused in the past month now that Jorge Polanco has become The Hottest Hitter In The Major Leagues.  He notched Wednesday's only run, a Homer in the Sixth Inning.  To be fair, maybe the White Sox were thinking ahead to the airplane flight they needed to take immediately after the contest to get to Dyersville, Ia., for last/Thursday night's Field Of Dreams Game.  Still, Polanco has been must-watch lately.

They finish off their long homestand with three against Tampa and a trio vs. Cleveland.  They then travel to The Bronx to begin a four-Game set against the New York Yankees.

Expenses Without Receipts

Starting from Wednesday, August 11:

• I'll have to go back to Friday, August 6, when I finally made it to my first stripper party since the pandemic (and actually before it).  I was texted an invitation by *****y, and I was told that she and three others would be there.  But when I got there, I eventually saw those other three, but *****y was nowhere to be found.  However, ******e, a blast from the past who is living in Las Vegas now, was there!  I have a rule whereby I try my best to take the stripper who invited me to the house party to a room.  With that an impossibility, I went with the, uh, interloper who was from out of town and (at least according to her) had not made any money during the evening.  She did with me; unfortunately, I was not able to "perform" and had to jerk myself off onto her bikini area.  I hope getting doubled-teamed by her and ***e* later tonight will get my dick to respond better.  Anyway, she cost me: $140.
• Let's take this back to Sunday the 1st, where I finally was able to make plans with *****a for a handjob.  I'm ... starting to really like her, on a genuine, non-sexual level.  And unlike with ******e above five days later, she was able to get me off, thank goodness.  Cost: $150.
• That evening, after work, I went out to find a pub that was showing the U. S. against Mexico in the final of the Gold Cup.  Part Wolf (used to be the Nomad, RIP) is my go-to spot for championship Games of international soccer competitions.  But although they showed the Match and turned up the sound, I was only three people who were there to watch it.  By contrast, for the EURO Final, the place was mostly packed with dozens of people in there.  Shoot, there were, like, nine other people at Part Wolf who hung out after playing a gig at Palmer's across the street.  I had a really sweet and thus good Hard Cider from Blake's, out of Armada, Mich.  I also had a Heggies supreme pizza I decided to order after I saw that the Game was going to kick off a half-hour later than advertised (big mistake), and I got a Coke because the Match (eventually won by the U-S-A!  U-S-A!) went into Extra Time.  With tips and it all added up to: $29.
• Oh, and I parked, too: $3.
• Finally, I go back to Tuesday, July 27, where I finally was able to get my shoes shined at Lisa's.  Had to skip June because she was out due to surgery.  Wonder how much lasting damage has been done to my shoes because I hadn't had them shined and polished for two months?  With tip: $20.

I can see these EWR lists getting longer now that I have decided to go back to whoring at parties.  That'll damage my wallet, too.  Anyhoo, I'm good through August 11.

Wait, Wait ... It's Nice To Be Wanted!

OK, so this serves as part addendum to my previous blog post.  The other guy who is in the same position as I, well, he in fact did not have any plans for the next two weeks.  And seeing as I do have plans, it is he who will be taking all seven available second shift dates: All next week and the two following that.  (It was supposed to be this Thursday and Friday, but I guess the person who wanted to take that time off thought that was too soon, so she changed her requests to after next week instead of before.)

Another surprise happened at work yesterday, and it's a good thing.  My co-worker who was afflicted with COVID-19 came back to work!  I was told the news from my boss when I popped into his office first thing yesterday morning to ask where specifically I should be that day.  He told me she was coming in for a half-day.  Glad she's back.  Glad she's alive.  I'm sure she feels the same way.

So the former lets me stick to other days of coverage for other people that had been already planned; no need to find someone to fill in for me so I can work evenings.  The latter, as my co-worker slowly ramps up her hours, will presumably obviate the need for me to fill in for her and come in half an hour early.  And that's good because I have been running around, going from one position to another, for the past few months now.  That probably means there will be less of that, possibly a lot less.

Have I been complaining about all that running around here in Wailing And Failing?  If so ... well, I take it all back!  It's nice to be wanted!  It's nice to be seen as someone who can fill in in a pinch and do the work almost as well as the full-time person I'm substituting for!  Please let me prove I'm indispensable!  Please don't let me be just some drowsy data entry drone for weeks at a time now, even though that may have been something I said I wanted!  I was stupid then!  I can do all the work now!

God, I'm such a hypocrite.

Second Shift's Nice, But ...

You know, for all my talk about how I like being by myself for second shift, and then having anxiety during that shift, etc., etc., I have not talked about the woman who works that shift.  She's really nice.  I like her a lot.

Saying that, she sometimes has this annoying penchant for asking for time off not months or weeks, but instead days in advance.  That happened yesterday, and it's a whopper -- seven consecutive evenings, starting from Thursday and, obviously, going through all next week.  Again, I would usually jump at the chance to fill in for her.  But I don't think I have to explain that in the near term I would have plans.  And I do: ****e* (which I just remembered went by the stripper name ******e) invited me and herself to ***e*'s place for our third threesome; I planned on going to My Favorite Stripclub (Cover Version) later this week; I promised my friend we would catch a Saints Game next week; and I have next Friday off, though that was mostly to fuck ****e, and I don't know what the hell happened to her.  Anyway, I have several evenings this week and next where I have stuff I want to do.  And all that's in jeopardy now that she plopped these days off, ostensibly, on my lap.

Well, maybe not my lap.  My supervisor has to deal with scheduling, and there's one other person who can split up the duties with me.  But it ain't ideal to go from working till midnight and then getting home at 12:30 only to wake up (potentially) at 5:30 to get to work at 6:30.  And if I keep up my evening plans and have the other guy do second shift on some of those dates, I'll have that strange turnaround time once or twice, and that might be difficult.  And that's why, when I replied to my boss, I told him that since it might be awkward to work second shift one night and then first shift the next day, it might make more sense if I just, well, took second shift for all seven nights.

That might happen; for all I know, this other guy has something going on.  He's human, he can make plans for the next two weeks, too.  And so it would be left to me to fill this shift, and since there's only person there, it is pretty vital that someone picks up the slack for her.  Look, all those things above are not must-dos; I can reschedule.  But I'd rather not, you know?  And I don't know why I can't look forward to these best laid plans because my co-worker -- my very nice, friendly co-worker -- kind of ruined them because she either couldn't give a proper head's-up or chose to spontaneously say she wants this and next week off.  A head's-up would have been nice.

Two Days A Week ... ?

With getting vaccinated, hopefully putting the pandemic behind me (we shall see), and no longer having a night test scoring job, I have finally started going back to the community center to work out.  Pair that with attending house parties again, and it almost feels like my evenings are just as busy as they were before the pandemic.

Maybe that's not good.  One of the better things to come out of the pandemic is a universal slowing down because I had nothing to do once I got home from work.  Lassitude settled in, and I got out of shape -- that's why it's important for me to exercise again.  But I did a lot of running around back before the 'Rona hit.  That was a lot of money that burned through my wallet.  Lot of mileage on my car, too.  Finally, as much as naps eff up my sleep routine, being able to catch up on rest does wonders for my body.  Maybe I've become a homebody in the past 17 months, and that possibly is for the better.

But all work and no play make U-Dub (that's me) a dull boy.  Therefore, I endeavor to strike a balance and go out two days per workweek.  That way I can work out (which I want to do at least one evening during the week, then add a second day during the weekend once the gym opens back up seven days a week), hang out with my wang out (possibly; otherwise I'll, like, eat at one of the places that host our Game-watching parties), and still be able to relax and catch up on my sleep.  Last week I exercised on Tuesday (when I wanted to do so on Monday but had a very long nap), then went out to a stripper party on Friday.  This week I want to work out today/Monday and either go to My Favorite Stripclub (Cover Division) or ... uh, do something else because I work late into the afternoon on Friday, and it doesn't make sense for me to come home to eat when my parents have already cleaned up the dining table.

I need to start placing other things I plan to do over the rest of the month.  A friend and I are going to a St. Paul Saints Game next week.  I need to reconnect and meet up with another friend.  I need to go to the strip club all the strippers went to after My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Edition) closed.  State Fair's coming up.  And bridging the end of the month and the beginning of next month, I snagged a job working a Golden Gophers football Game.

I'll be busy, for both business and pleasure.  Just like before.  But I don't want to forsake the happiness of home, and of not doing anything, which is something I realized was worth cherishing over the past year-plus.  And so I hope I can do, and maintain, both.

Oh yeah, so about the alumni event ... so it turns out that we didn't have too many volunteers, but in fact exactly enough.  There were enough people saying they had to cancel that everybody who wanted to come in and volunteer.  God bless 'em, because at least they told me they weren't coming, because a few people no-showed.  Not a huge deal, but just telling people you can't make it is just an act of consideration.

So everything else went fine.  I did not ask the screening questions like I should have; I instead just asked them to fill out all contact information on the sheet while telling them I assumed they didn't have any symptoms of COVID-19, wasn't exposed to anyone who has COVID-19 in the past 14 days, etc.  I'm glad they all understood, especially the ones whose names weren't on the sheet and to whom I asked to put all their contact info down.  Now, I saddled that one guy with a half-dozen pens that didn't work.  I had a fleeting thought before I left to use those because I didn't want to lose any of the ones that did work.  I hope he doesn't think I was making fun of him, and I hope he doesn't think I'm a schmuck.

Now, posting social media and a post-event report, and I'm all good.

My Dick Don't Work

So last week, when I saw *****a for a handjob, it took a while, but she eventually got me off.  On Friday, I visited my first stripper party since the pandemic began, I ran into ****e* (formerly ******e), who was visiting from Las Vegas.  She said that hadn't given anyone there a private, and I believe her, and she doesn't live in town anymore, so I decided that I was going to take her to a room.  And as much action as we had, I had to jerk myself off.

I used to be so responsive, but now, sexual stimulation by the woman doesn't get me off.  Why not?  Old age?  Been there, done that?  Am I not -- criminy -- attracted to these women anymore?  Or maybe my dick doesn't work anymore?

****e* has invited me to ***e*'s place for another threesome, which would be the third we've done together.  The first one we did (which I blog posed about) was a mind-blowing, seminal moment in my life, the first time I did stuff with two women at once.  This time, however, I am scared as hell I won't be able to perform.  But ****e* is leaving in about ten days, so I have to take advantage of this before it's gone for good.  I think I can see those two next weekend.  But will my dick work by then?

The alumni event is in the afternoon and I am nervous as hell.  I usually am nervous, but the damn alumni association Thursday dropped on my proverbial lap a set of COVID-19 screening questions I'm supposed to ask the other volunteers, after which I have them initial on a check-in sheet which I have to scan and send back to them.  Contract tracing purposes, which I understand, even though I am still at loggerheads with them over, well, destroying the club I presided over.  But I'm not sure whether to hue to these questions strictly and risk coming off as a tyrant whose events won't ever be attended by these people again, or just ignore them and risk getting in trouble in case an outbreak occurs.  Too much pressure for an organizer.  A president of an alumni chapter, no.  But like I said, I am not president of an alumni chapter anymore.

And after that I'm supposed to go to the United Match in the evening.  I know that's supposed to be fun, but with all the stress and anxiety I'm already feeling over the event, it sounds like a lot.  And it'll be as humid as all get out, too, so that won't be fun.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#0: United FC (Last Week: 0).  In its only Match of the screening Week, on the road versus Vancouver at Real Salt Lake, they drew with the Whitecaps, 2-all, in what really was a bullshit call.  In the dying embers of the Game, a Whitecap attacker, in the Loons box, dragged down Ethan Finlay.  The Referee called a Foul on Finlay and, because this happened in the box, awarded Van City a Penalty Kick, which Cristian Dajome (who scored the 'Caps' other Goal) converted to salvage a Tie.  Worse than the initial call itself was both the ref and the Video Assistant Referee refusing to take another look at what is a clear and obvious mistake.  MNUFC is still in playoff position, but every Point counts, and this keeps the club on the edge.  Still, because by all rights the Loons should have won this, I am placing them above negative numbers.

They host another woebegone squad, Houston, Saturday.  This is the Match I have a ticket for, and if the storms that are forecast for the evening don't happen when the Game happens (fingers crossed), I will be able to attend it.

#-1: Twins (Last Week: -1).  Went 3-3 this past Week, but no matter.  Just checked; only Arizona, The Bastard St. Louis Browns, The Bastard Washington Senators v.2.0, and Pittsburgh have worse records than the Twinks.

Let us review the transactions the Nine made at the Trade Deadline -- and the ones they didn't.  The big one is Jose Berrios, who was shipped off to Toronto.  I don't want to be a hypocrite because in last Week's Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey I verbally shook my head in disbelief at how he blew that lead vs. the White Sox on July 19.  He is barely an ace; I think he's old enough, and has thrown in enough Innings, for me to slot him in as a third- or possible second-Starting Pitcher on a championship team.  But he would be the ace for the Twins, and he is homegrown, which I believe is a prerequisite for this organization to break the bank to re-sign a player.  But they didn't.  Berrios was signed through next Year, and it appears as though his agent told the front office he's going to sow his wild oats, and that made him attractive trade bait.

However, while I slag this trade as yet another sign of "same ol' Twins," the return the ballclub got for Berrios was universally considered great.  Both Shortstop Austin Martin (nice name if he's into luxury vehicles) and Pitcher Simeon Woods-Richardson (has there ever been a good baseball player with a hyphenated last name?) immediately become the two best prospects in the Twins organization, and it's not as if Minnesota has a barren farm system.  And it doesn't appear as if fans have to wait a half-decade for them to come up to The Show.  They'll be here, if not in 2023 then maybe even next Year.  And, if all goes right, they'll be very productive for the main club ... and be traded before their second contract.

They finish up a four-Game set in Houston, then come home to host the ChiSox as part of their final big homestand.

#-2: Timberwolves (Re-Entry!).  Being so capped with two max players meant the Woofie Dogs have little-to-no wiggle room in which to make trades, sign Free Agents, and improve the roster.  That's why I am relatively unperturbed that the squad completely sat out last Week's Draft.  Still, I'm disappointed that they sent away Ricky Rubio to Cleveland.  As much of a liability he is on Offense, he was a veteran presence for a young team that still needs leadership and direction.  Moreover, Rubio loved it back in Minnesota, and by all accounts, you can count on both hands the number of NBA-caliber players who love it in Minnesota.

This largely looks like a move for cap relief, although the player the Timberwolves got back, Taurean Prince, is a stretch 4 that this team has needed for a long time.  But they now have enough money to go out and spend on a Power Forward better than Prince and can help on Defense.  Who could that be?  There are a slew of guys prognosticators have tossed out as possibilities, so I don't know where they'll turn.  But it still seems as though the person coming in won't be a needle-mover.  No, Karl-Anthony Towns will have stay off the Injured List, D'Angelo Russell needs to D up more (and stay off the Injured List), and the role players have to, well, grow up.

#-3: Wild (Re-Entry!).  The more I think about it, the more I think Bill Guerin made a huge mistake in buying out both Zach Parise and Ryan Suter.  Both of them may not be there, but their contracts are, especially for the next four seasons.  You might as well keep them around to hope they can still produce; right now, they're millstones that will prevent the big club from getting any better.

Meanwhile, and don't look now, but the Defenseman corps, once the bedrock of this franchise, suddenly seems to be soft.  Suter, still a good second pairing on his best days, is cavorting with The Bastard North Stars, and Carson Soucy was plucked by the Seattle Kraken in the Expansion Draft.  And I'm sorry, but the Free Agents the team signed a couple weeks ago -- Alex Goligoski (One Of Us), Frederick Gaudreau, Jon Lizotte, Dominic Turgeon -- are far from difference makers either at the pivot or on the blueline.  I'm making a prediction: The Minnesota Mild will have one of the worst Defenses in the NHL next Year.  Book it.

Meanwhile, the wrangling over signing Kapril Kaprizov and Kevin Fiala are going nowhere, and talk of trading for Jack Eichel has cooled significantly.  All this in an offseason before a one-Year window in which the squad may have enough salary cap room to go all-in on a Stanley Cup before the dead money from Parise's and Suter's contracts really begin to bite.  Great.

#-4: Vikings (Re-Entry!).  These guys had bad news comparably as bad as the Wolves and Wild.  But seeing that Training Camp has just started, being able to fear the worst of the Vikes' upcoming season as it's just starting invites a doom that is starker and more imminent than those other two teams.

It was a uniquely shitty couple days for the Purple.  They released First-Round Corner Jeff Gladney after details of his domestic violence arrest came out.  I haven't seen them myself because I don't want to get a sick stomach, but apparently they have to be so bad that even a football team won't put up with it.  And a reconfigured Cornerback group undergoes even more entropy.

But then the unforced error that is the Quarterback Quarantine really embarrassed this organization.  I don't know if I have all my facts straight, but it seems as though rookie QB Kellen Mond, who definitely did not get vaccinated, got COVID-19.  He, starting QB Kirk Cousins, and fellow QB Nate Stanley all had to be separated from the other players, the latter two under protocols whereby they get tested more frequently.  I don't know about Stanley, but Cousins came back yesterday/Thursday.

Give him credit for at least answering questions, but Cousins was pretty deflective when it came to queries over his vaccination status.  When asked point blank if he got the shot, he basically said that's a personal matter, so that means he didn't.  He went on to show that he is doing what he is supposed to do to keep safe from the coronavirus (according to the rules set by the NFL) and, at the very least, acting as if he believes that the virus is a big deal and a bad thing.  At the same time, he was tap-dancing like a motherfucker when it comes to getting the vaccine, something that could solve a lot of problems for the Vikings -- to ease restrictions for his team, if not necessarily to stay healthy, even though it does.

Contrast that vacillation with Head Coach Mike Zimmer.  I gotta tell you that I had no idea at all that Zim would be so pro-vaccine.  I don't know where it comes from -- whether he is trying to tell his players that getting shots clears away a lot of unnecessary obstacles or if he is personally invested in the benefits vaccines provide -- but I have to say that I like this (trigger word) "wokeness" from him.  Note that in his press conferences he isn't just saying that vaccines is good to ease NFL virus policy; he actually believes vaccines work, and moreover, he actually commented on some of the anti-vax disinformation that's on the Internet.  He said, "Woof" -- and "Woof" is right.

Zimmer's forthrightness (one of his most appealing qualities) is clashing with his starting Quarterback's anti-vaccine obfuscation.  On top of all that, Zimmer is scared as hell that Cousins will actually get infected, and that it will come during the regular season, or at the end of the regular season as they're fighting for a playoff spot.  He sees the statistics of transmission of COVID spiking everywhere.  I'm sure he believes that the vast majority of people getting sick, or worse, is almost universally affecting the unvaccinated.  And the linchpin of his team, the most important player on the Vikings, is one of Those People.  He can see disaster coming, and because of the players' union, there isn't a damn thing he can do about it.

Well, actually, he did do something about it: Give Jake Browning first-team reps.  I don't know know why and/or how Browning got to train while the others had to sit out, although I assume Browning has received the jab.  But I have the feeling that Zimmer would not mind starting the season with Browning under Center -- and beyond.

Too Many Volunteers

I have a big ex-alumni chapter event coming up Saturday.  I didn't think many people would reserve and show up.  But now, sadly, there are so many people that I don't know if I can fit them all in.  I actually cut by 40% the number of spots I reserved, and now I wish I could have those back.  And I don't know if they can all show up and squeeze in because of COVID-19 restrictions.

I really, really don't want to disappoint anyone.  But if I must, I will sacrifice my own spot so the rest can volunteer.  Well, maybe that's a dumb idea.  Who knows if I can come up with a better one.

I was told up to, like, a week before deadline that there were, like, eight people who were going to show up.  Well, maybe there was a raft of late registrations, plus there are a couple people who bypassed the normal registration process and just asked me if they could show up.  Yep, maybe this is my fault.

I Pissed Money Away On Yet Another Loons Ticket

I have so royally frittered away money in deciding which MNUFC Matches I go to, it's not even funny.

I originally bought two tickets for the season after opting out and getting all the money I had paid into the 2020 season as a credit.  The first Game, against San Jose, I decided not to go to because of the soccer tournaments I wanted to watch instead, and I eventually sold that ticket on a loss.  Because of that and because I don't know if I can get to any other Matches, I decided that for the other Game for which I bought a ticket, this Saturday's vs. Houston, I was going to sell the cheaper, upper-deck ticket I originally bought for a more expensive one on the other side of the stadium because 1) I want to know what it's like to be rich and 2) I wanted to be shielded from the rays of the sun that will be beating that side of the stadium that evening.

Once again, it was not a seller's market when it comes to scalping tickets online.  Like I did with the Earthquakes ticket, I originally set the price so that if someone bought, I would recoup the money I paid for the other ticket I bought.  Of course, that didn't sell.  And this time, unlike the first ticket, I quickly moved to cut the price to clearance levels.  The guy who bought it probably got The Deal Of A Lifetime.  You're welcome.  But I priced that ticket to move because wanted to get out of the decision/mistake I made.

I took a $40 bath for the San Jose ticket.  I don't even want to know how much money I pissed away for switching the Dynamo ticket.  Maybe I'll revisit it and tell you guys later, to put into a dollar amount how stupid I am for changing my mind like this.

Back To My Whoring!

The rise of the Delta variant is spooking all of us.  I have been convinced to start wearing my mask again everywhere, even though I am not as consistent with it as I was before I became fully vaccinated.  But I may have no choice; municipalities all around the country are reinstituting mask mandates, and just last night it appears that a bunch of private organizations -- from businesses like Target to hospitals to performance venues including First Avenue -- are mandating their employees to get vaccinated and are either demanding proof of no COVID-19 and/or strenuously asking customers to wear a mask.  People are fatigued, sure.  And I do not envy any employee if they're tired of putting masks back on and, more importantly, asking customers to mask up.  But they're the problem: We're not done with this pandemic because motherfucking anti-vax, anti-mask motherfuckers aren't getting their shots and are thus inviting the coronavirus to infect them and, in turn, giving the virus a shot at mutating into something worse.  Honestly, I would jail and/or even kill maskholes at this point.  I'm done with them.

In the meantime, however, I am going back to normal, and that will include going to house parties.  And it just so happens that I was invited to not one but two of these stripper parties via text yesterday.  And because I no longer have a night job, I can go.

First, there's *****e, who continues to invite me to her parties even though I can't go because they're so far away.  About a month ago she invited me to a place that's a lot closer, but I couldn't go because I still had that test scoring job.  She's the one I called dumb as a box of rocks, and frankly, she confirmed my assessment of her when, last week, she invited me to that same party ... the same party to which I told her I couldn't go because I had work.  Stupid me, however, because I didn't remember that; I just told her that I couldn't make the party *****e invited me to because I had that test scoring job, as if it was a different, brand-new party she was hosting.

No matter.  This afternoon she texted me saying she was going to host another party for later this month, and it is at this house that's a lot closer to me.  And, like I blog posted when I called her stupid, I am desperate, so I am giving her another chance.  I have only gotten one lapdance from her, but according to my principles, since she invited me, I intend on taking her to a room for some shit.  Let's see if not being smart correlates to being a fucking animal in bed.

And it gets better, a lot better.  This past evening, *****y, out of the blue, texted me that she is hosting a party with three other babes I remember, and it's happening this Friday.  The great thing about the pandemic (such as it is), and about working two jobs, is all the money you make.  And now I have plenty to burn through, starting this Friday.

I wanna get my fuck on, and hopefully my cock works in service of all the hot strippers I'm going to see, both later this week and later this month.  But, well, there's that damn virus.  I am almost certain that at a house party like this there will be people (mostly mouthbreathing stripper hounds) who are not vaccinated, don't believe that the coronavirus is real, thinks shots implant tracking chips in their bloodstream, and insists that Trump is still president.  I probably am walking into an unsafe environment.  But, to be honest, I am perverted enough to risk it, all because I want to go back to my whoring.

And Now, My Weeknights Are ... Mine!

This is going to be weird.  Starting tonight, after dinner, I ... have nothing to do.

It's been, I think, since mid-April when I have had evenings to myself, and that's because of the test scoring job I picked up.  If you don't count the break for a couple weeks that ended mid-April, I think it's been mid-March when I have had evenings to myself.  Now, the test scoring gig actually ended the week before last, but last week I had second shift for three days, I went out to watch the NBA Draft Thursday, then decided to catch up with one of the two places that will host our football game-watching events in the fall.  So in essence, I was busy evenings until this week.

By the way, Friday was scheduled to be the last day of our scoring project.  I obviously had to skip the first three days of the week, and I really wanted to see the NBA Draft so I was going to bug out of scoring papers Thursday.  But I was asking the supervisors whether I could make one final cameo appearance on Friday (and I would move around my work schedule in order to accommodate that), just to be with my work colleagues whom I have never seen in-person before and they were going to get back to me ... until we got the bombshell that that Friday before Friday was going to be our last day.  (Did we hear about it that Friday, or that Thursday?  Doesn't matter.)  That cameo appearance question was thus moot, because no one would be working that day.

So, now I have my weeknights back.  That's great!  And now I can spend that ... well, probably by lying around on my bed and taking a nap.  Or, I could catch up on work and e-mails.  Or, work out, something I should do.  Or, go to a strip club and catch up with my stripper girlfriends.  Or ... etc.  On the other hand, they say that idle hands are the devil's workshop, and I would be lying if I didn't think there'd be a good chance I will do nothing but lie on my bed and take naps for the time being.  Also, I've been spending a hell of a lot of money on OnlyFans, and I justified that by thinking that my test scoring money would pay for it.  Well, that's gone now, so if the only active thing I do weekday evenings is get onto OF and pay for porn, it's coming out of my real job's paycheck.  What to do, what to do. ...

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One other unrelated thing I want to slide in here.  For dinner we had egg rolls and meat, and then I go out to see the Gold Cup Final (U-S-A!  U-S-A!), and because the Match started a half-hour later than it had been advertised everywhere, I was so bored I bought myself a Heggies pizza to eat.  It took me more than an hour to eat the whole thing, and obviously that's because I had an actual dinner a few hours before then.  My weight and cholesterol are through the roof, man, seriously. ...