Changing Modems Regrets

I replaced cable modems tonight.  Successfully, I think so.  Much better to buy your own modem than rent the modem/router combo given to us when we had cable Internet installed, even if the modem that was given us works just fine.  For this new (and touted as best) modem I need a router, and thankfully Father bought one, so I brought that out of the box and we're using it now.

What I wanted to do before I switched it, however, was apply a speed test to the modem we had.  Wanted to see, just in case, whether the modem we rented is actually faster than the modem/router combo that we're using now.  But I forgot to do that before I switched modems after dinner today.  Meant to do it, but it just slipped my mind.  Still wonder, but it's now too late, because switching modems means connecting online with Comcast to re-activate the old modem, I think, and I guess it's just too much hassle for a point of curiosity at this point.

Oh, well.  Even if it's decisively slower, it's better to buy your own modem than to rent one from the cable company.  Right?

Fucking Dealership Blew My Cover

I have a puny percentage of oil life left in my car.  Last time I was blindsided when it went down to ... 5%?  0%?  Anyway, I kind of flipped out in my car when I was driving ... uh, maybe it happened last week where it went from 15% (which is the point where the warning automatically shows up on the instrument panel) to 10% after, like, a week.

I vacillated as to when I would finally bring it in.  Grandmother's death pushed up my initial hope that I would do it when it got down to 5% because I'm a rebel.  Now I had to do it before I leave for Hong Kong in case my folks want to use the car while I'm gone; I don't want them to flip out at seeing 10% or 5% on the dash.  I made a reservation for the day before I had to leave, but I remembered that I had a coupon for the oil change part of the service (they also have to rotate the tires) which expires today, June 30.  So I changed it to noon today.

When I was eating dinner last (Thursday) night with my folks Mother reminded me of the appointment.  WHA-WHA-WHAAAATT?!?!?!  The goddamn dealership, for some goddamn reason, called the landline to remind me of the appointment.  Why they did that, I have no fucking clue.  Well, I did give them the home phone -- but only as a back-up, in case something serious happened as they looked at my car, for example, and they couldn't reach my cell, which I know I designated as my primary number.  But I never got a call yesterday/Thursday about the appointment.  Someone who wasn't paying any attention just called home instead.

And so that just totally fucking blew my cover.  They now know that I have something planned in the middle of what is supposed to be my workday.  I know for a fact that they now wonder if I am actually going to work tomorrow -- and if I actually go to work at all.  Of course, I'm not, but I didn't think the fucking dealership would rat me out.  My God, this could result in a whole host of bullshit questions I didn't want to deal with, based on getting made in the most unlikely way possible.

I want to scream at the first person at the dealership I see.  I'll just demand that they delete the phone number off their record as soon as I get in instead.  And hope that my parents don't fucking ask any more questions about it.

RIP, My Coke Rewards

So this is the last day of My Coke Rewards, the frequent-drinker's program where you would get codes off of Coke plastic bottle caps and can-pack packaging and enter them into the company's website (or through an app, even though I never downloaded it).  Doing that allows you can eventually redeem them for stuff like ... uh, gift certificates.

I have absolutely no idea when I started this or how I got roped into this.  I know it's been a long time.  In fact, I remember when I was back in El Paso, after some event at a high school stadium let out, I saw all these Coke and Sprite bottles (apparently this high school contracted through Coke) littered on the bleachers.  I had all the time in the world, and I wasn't going to live there long-term, so I decided to not care how I looked and spent a good, oh, half-hour going up and down the bleachers, twisting off the caps of every bottle that had a My Coke Rewards code on the other side.  While I was doing this one woman shouted out to me something to the affect of, "Are you OK?  Oh, you're just finding caps."

I decided to spread out entering the codes because if I didn't enter a code over a period of, I think, 90 days, the account gets deactivated and, at a period of time after that, you would lose all your points.  So I think I shoved all these codes I gathered at the stadium and basically hoarded them for years.  When I visited my sister when she lived in Los Angeles she volunteered to enter some for me.  The rest I finally put in, several at a time, over the winter at work at the health insurance place.  Some of those codes I held onto for years.  I'll be honest, now thinking about it -- the codes I got from El Paso, they may all have been entered by my sister.  Maybe I didn't keep them with me until this past winter.  But I'll say that I kept them for a long, long time.

My plan of meting those codes out every three months so my account wouldn't go dormant didn't work.  I entered codes so sparingly I forgot to enter them at all.  I lost my account twice; the second time, over the past year (did I blog about this?), I had to beg and grovel to get my points back.  That was shortly before Coke announced that they're ending My Coke Rewards.  What timing.

There were two major deadlines.  A few months ago was the deadline after which you could no longer enter codes.  So all these bottles being sold with 10-(?) character strings of nonsense are now useless.  And now, today, is the last day to redeem those codes.  So after last week, when I cashed in about half my remaining points for an Amazon gift card (which I immediately used to knock ten bucks off the new cable modem I purchased), I've been in kind of a frenzy.

Well, make that last night.  After lamenting that I was four points short of another $10 Amazon gift card (dammit) I got a $10 Target gift card, bought this offer for prints on Shutterfly (a site that apparently is just giving shit away for free), made a donation for, get this, a nickel to my high school, and with nothing else I can spend it on, I redeemed the rest for chances on sweepstakes for debit cards.  Thank goodness for single-point redemptions; otherwise I would have surrendered them (after they were converted) to a charity of Coke's choosing, only the categories of their philanthropic aims were known.  (We get to vote on giving unused points to a charity that provides "Education," "Empowerment" or, uh, the "Environment?")

Best to do it now and be done with it.  I guess I had a relationship with it because I've done this for so long.  It was kind of a millstone, but sometimes, when I'm walking and I see a cap on the ground, I look around to see if strangers are looking at me.  And if there aren't (or if the strangers are people who seem cool), I would pick it up and/or twist it off the bottle and put it in my pocket to enter later.  That was a part of my life, irregular as it was, for at least 16 years.

And after tonight, it's officially gone.  I don't know if I am happy.  I don't know if I am sad.  I feel that torn about a lot of things.

ETA at 12:08 a.m. on Friday, June 30 a correction, a pretty big one: I got the end date wrong.  My Coke Rewards ends on June 30, which is Friday.  Late Friday night is when it shuts down.  Apologies.

So to forget about Grandmother I went to *a***'s all the way below 494 to fuck her.  And boy, did I fuck her.  Without a condom too, just the way God intended.

While she went downstairs to shower (which is something she does before our trysts), I took a shit.  I saw a scale sitting on the floor.  I hadn't weighed myself in a while, so I decided to do so.  I came in at around 165, which actually is much lighter than I think I was the last time I weighed myself.

So that's good.  Too bad I think I ballooned past that after dinner, stopping by DQ for a an Orange Julius before typing this at the library, and then going to Taco Bell after I leave here.

It Came Together Quick ...

... but I have a ticket to attend Grandmother's funeral.  After taking Monday night to check for the obviously exorbitant price, on Tuesday night the price dropped by $150 and I had to pounce on it.  And with my brother already booking his ticket, the three of us have been texting back-and-forth to book airline tickets and find accommodations.  I thought there was a decent chance I wouldn't be going; now, I am going.

Now to break the news to my parents.  I did not bring up the fact that I was looking for a ticket to say goodbye to Grandmother to them over dinner, even though I knew they were given information about when the cremation was going to happen.  I did everything I could passive-aggressively to give them the idea that it was bothering me -- staying silent, staring vacantly, checking out the clock, acting sort-of chagrined.  But I couldn't just say it, you know?  I just didn't think I could bring up the subject if they got real upset.  Instead, my brother texted them that we were all thinking about going and that they should go, too.  (They're not going; they say they're too busy with real estate matters at home.)

I totally pussed out.  And so my folks now know of my plan to fly to Hong Kong through my siblings even though I live with my folks.  In retrospect, I should've brought it up, right?

Bad Driver: 792 XDV

This fucker, this young punk, is a trip.  I go around this guy turning 'round the bend on 694 East because I was about to be forced to take the 169 exit off my lane.  I needed to stay on 694; that was the only reason I cut in front of him.  Honest!  (OK, I did see this asshole Fast And Furious has way through traffic like an asshole, so I wanted to show him up.)

I thought I saw the last of him.  But this guy, who was in a red Dodge whip, came storming back.  As I was coming up on a slow car in my lane, he drove up to my right.  No, I thought, he isn't going to cut in front of me.  But he did.  There literally was no room between me and this asshole car.  That's the way he wanted it.  And he actually cut through my lane, to the left lane on my left, and then took off and slalomed through the traffic yards ahead of me.

So this teenage prick cuts in front of cars only to slow down, only to start cutting in front of cars, apparently because I "disrespected" him.  Beautiful.

Oh, I love this part.  Just before he pulled off this stunt, I caught a quick glimpse of him through my rear mirror.  I swear I saw him put one of his hands, balled up into a fist, into the open palm of his other hand.  Like he was saying, "I'm coming for you."  You go on with your bad self, shitstain!  Man, to be young and have a fast car and to think that the most important thing in the world is to show up a car who needed to get onto your lane.  He didn't have the death of his beloved grandmother on his mind, that's for sure.

I will admit that it was kind of cool that he drove so close in front of me without causing an accident.  Doesn't mean I'm not going to write his ass up.

So I fell asleep on a Monday night, again.  And again I woke up to news about Grandmother.

There is now a funeral (well, a cremation) date set.  It is far enough that, with some planning, I can make it.

Unfortunately, on the last day of work today, I was asked back onto another project that is projected to take me through for another two weeks.  And I don't know if it's possible, or even appropriate, to just start this project and then go to Hong Kong for the funeral.

If I go, I don't take on this job.  And if I don't go, well, I don't see Grandmother again.  So I have one hell of a choice to make, and I need to make plans, like, now.

And not to mention what my parents would think if I told them I wanted to go.

Christ, I kind of hoped this arrangement would be happening, say, tomorrow, whereby I have no chance of needing to make a choice.

Back Into The Void

I still can't believe that I'm 41 years old and I have to go back to doing this shit.  After we finish up field testing today, I am back out on the street.  I guess this is what happens when you decide there's nothing you want to do as a career when you get out of college.  Or when you're 30.

I'm not sure this is the right time for me to not have anything to do.  With Grandmother's death, I'm afraid I'll be spending my days alone with my thoughts of her.  They say that time heals all wounds.  That adage may or may not have anything to do with death.  But frankly, the more I think about her, the more I realize that she's not here anymore.  I think it's getting harder for me to deal with, and not being occupied with work during the day may might make dealing with it worse.

I haven't even thought about the disruption being unemployed again will bring.  I have to get up for no good reason, I have to lie to my parents about where I'm going, I need to find a place and a time to eat all the food they're giving me, I need to figure out how to fucking occupy my day.  And that doesn't even include stuff like finding a job, or even getting unemployment.  Further complicating matters is that I have chores that I need to do, such as going to the dentist, and fulfilling this study I started back in the winter.  And I'm still holding out the possibility that I will fly to Hong Kong for any remembrance arrangements.

So I don't know.  In one sense I'm grateful for the free time.  But on the other hand, I'm being thrown (or am I throwing myself?) back into instability, something that I never thought an adult should do.  I hope I find something that keeps the money rolling in.  But in the meantime I'll just ... be.  Because there's nothing else I can do, I guess.

---

You know, I wish I had the chance to, once it's over of course, live this life over again armed with the experience of what not to do.  But that is impossible, of course.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Timberwolves (Re-Entry!).  OK, I don't know if a team that is in the off-season has ever claimed the top spot in a Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey, so this is a first.  And I'll be honest: I wasn't so high on the trade that sends Zach LaVine, Kris Dunn and the draft pick that turned out to be Finnish big man (by way of Arizona) Lauri Markkanen to the Chicago Bulls for Jimmy Butler and the draft pick that became Creighton Center Justin Patton.  But after hearing what other people and experts think about it, I'm warming up to the notion that this was a lopsided trade in favor of the Woofs.

First of all, Patton is incidental in all of this.  (Also, I didn't know till I just looked it up that the T-Wolves sold off their second-round pick.  Wouldn't have mattered anyway.)  Butler's the big deal, for both sides, and this is a signal that the organization believes that they're one piece, a veteran piece, away from being the team to get their brains beaten in by the Golden State Warriors in the Western Conference Finals.  He is everything the squad needs: A wing player who can defend, a guy who can create his shot from nothing as the clock is winding down, and a veteran presence that can finally instill some clutch guts in the young pups that blew more second-half leads than any other team in the league.

Tom Thibodeau had Butler as a player, and from all accounts, even though their relationship is combustible, Butler could play for Thibs in a way he never could (or would) under current Bulls Head Coach Fred Hoiberg.  Butler had to leave Chicago.  But he should have left last year, when the Bulls could have gotten him for more than what they got now.  No matter; Thibodeau now has his prized player on this team, and it appears as though he will make Butler the Alpha Dog on this team ... well, maybe co-Alpha with Karl-Anthony Towns ... and the other players will fall in line behind him.

The Starting Five now sets up nicely.  You have four shooters and a Point Guard who loves to pass in Ricky Rubio.  (By the way, trading Dunn squelches forever the feeling that Rubio will be traded before he starts the downside of his career.  The job was Dunn's to lose, and yet somehow he lost it just after his rookie year?  Harsh for a guy who did things "the right way" by staying in school all four years.)  Pairing Butler with a disrupter like Rubio strengthens the perimeter D, and Butler joining the team improves the D, period.  Finally, Thibodeau is probably going to give Butler the responsibility of making Andrew Wiggins a two-way player.

And that's where my doubts begin.  LaVine may have grown the most out of him, Wiggins and Towns, but he was thought to have the lowest ceiling.  However, this year it appeared as though, through taking on Point duties and trying to D up a little more, he demonstrated a willingness to be coached.  I don't see that yet in Wiggins.  For all of his offensive prowess, the Wolves might have a knucklehead in Wiggy who just wants to score, and in my opinion, I'd rather have a team/role player who'll do what you ask him to do instead of a glory boy who can pour in 30 a night by have a +/- in the negative double-digits.  Also, LaVine (and Dunn for that matter) are young, so this franchise is committed to accelerating the maturation of the team.  Guess I'm saying I wouldn't have been totally upset if it was Wiggins leaving and not LaVine.  Finally, I still think of Butler as a late-first-rounder who somehow blew up to be a superstar.  I still can't quite believe he is as good as everyone says he is.  Is he good enough to be the face of this team, like it or not?  Will he leave in 2019 after his relatively modest contract ends?

Nevertheless, LaVine is coming back from an ACL injury and Markkanen seems to be able to only post up on offense.  If the Timberwolves are thisclose to breaking through, well, this move probably is the one that'll take them back to the playoffs.  And if they did it for a song, well, that means these guys win the week.

(Aside: I believe that like the Bulls, the Blackhawks and the Bears also made trades the day of the draft of their respective sports.  What's the deal with Chicago teams dealing on Draft Day?)

#-2: Lynx (Last Week: -Infinity).  I get to put last week's survey, where are three playing local teams lost on Saturday, behind me.  And I put the Lynx in second.  They put their first loss of the year behind them by clobbering Washington Friday, 93-76.  Still waiting for their games vs. the Los Angeles Sparks; this week they host San Antonio (tonight, probably on a Pride-themed night) and visit Phoenix Friday.

#-3: United FC (Last Week: -Infinity).  They still haven't won a game on the road, but at least they're doing pretty well at home.  A win against Portland and a draw with Vancouver this screening week.  Could have been worse.

Both matches were entertaining.  The victory over the Timbers Wednesday featured dueling Own Goals and dueling Red Cards; Abu Danladi was sent off for pushing and shoving.  At least he left after he scored the game-winning tally off a Keystone Kops-like clearance by the Timbers Defense.  (Christian Ramirez scored the third one.)  Portland did not score from the run of play.  They, in fact, scored twice -- once on themselves (the Own Goal), the other on a Penalty Kick.  The Whitecaps also failed to score from the run of play; in the first half they got on the board off a PK resulting from a foul on Goalkeeper Bobby Shuttleworth after Kevin Venegas made a stupid back pass that Vancouver's Brek Shea (a USMNT mainstay) was going to fire on goal.  The 'Caps made it 2-0 just before the half on a header off a Free Kick.

I was resigned to a defeat last (Saturday) night, but give credit to the Loons -- they came back fired up and ready to play.  And in this match other players put the biscuit in the basket.  Francisco Calvo headed a one-hopper to pull one back (off an assist from Kevin Molina, who may be the MVP of this club), and then Miguel Ibarra slid the ball to Jerome Thiesson for a low one-timer through a thicket of Whitecap posts to tie the game.  It was target practice for MNUFC from there, but although they controlled the match from the start of the Second Half (and really the entire game; they out-possessed Vancouver, like, 77-23% in the First Half), they just couldn't complete the comeback.  So yeah, I bemoan their continuing inability to defend off set pieces, but unlike other people who point out that they still dig themselves into holes to start matches, I really like how they grind throughout the 90 minutes and have the ability to score in the run of play.  Those are qualities you look for in a good team.  And so, even though they technically tied last night, since they were behind and scored the last Goal of the match, I'll treat it as a win.  Sort of.

This week they play at Yankee Stadium against NYCFC.  That'll be the last roadie before they're at TCF Bank Stadium for the next five weeks.

#-4: Twins (Last Week: -Infinity).  And while Twin Cities fans have the new shine of United and the continuing excellence of the Lynx, don't forget about the Twins.  They had a rocky weekend home sweep at the hands of Cleveland, and they only finished this screening week at 4-2, but they're still hanging around with Cleveland at the top of the American League Central.  In fact, they're going for a three-game sweep at Jacobs Field right now.  What's most impressive about this series (BTW they lost Sunday to Cleveland and then took two-of-three against the White Sox at Target) is that they won on Friday and Saturday without either Ervin Santana or Jose Berrios taking the mound.  In fact, Adelberto Mejia's 5-0 win Friday was the first time this season a Twins Pitcher other than Erv or Jose went the distance without surrendering a run.  The Twinks are facing a good team, at their place, and by already winning the series they ensure that they'll be, at most, 2 1/2 games out of first place in the division.  And it's almost June.  I think things can only get better from here for this squad.  Watch this space.

This week will test this club, however; they're just beginning a massive roadtrip.  After finishing up in the Land, they play four in Boston and then visit Kansas City for four games for the weekend.

You're Always Happy At A Donut Shop

An epiphany I had just a while ago.  I'm typing this (while summoning the strength to announce Grandmother's death) at the new outpost of Glam Doll Donuts, where it's been steadily busy on this summer Saturday night.  (The crowd is probably due to two occurrences: This is Pride Weekend in the Twin Cities and it is the first night of Eid al-Fitr.)  And you know it should be obvious, but whenever someone comes in, they're so happy.  Obviously it's because a donut shop.  You don't have to go to a donut shop.  If you go to a donut shop, it's because you want to be there.  Therefore you look forward to eating donuts at a donut shop.

Tonight has been no exception.  So many smiling faces once they go through the doors.  And this time around I've seen more than one person snap photos of the many varieties of donut Glam Doll has to sell.  Good for them!  And being in the middle of all this momentary happiness picks me up, it really does.

She's Gone

I still can't believe it, and I clutched when I typed that.

I haven't cried over Grandmother's death.  Maybe it's not yet, but I don't know if I have it in me.  I think it's because whenever I cried when I was young, my parents (and, I have to be honest, Grandmother) beat me even more.  And yet I feel as though if I don't cry I'm being totally disrespectful to her, and for what she did for me.  When I think of her that way, I get even more depressed.

But right now I'm empty, and I'm just so damn numb.  She's been out of the house for several years and out of the country for a few, but the thought that I no longer occupy Earth with Grandmother ... (sigh) ... I think about her now and again, but once my memory of her passes, I remind myself, "She's dead."  And it feels worse and worse every time I remind myself.  But ... I'm still empty and numb.

---

It's time for all my friends to know, so I'm going to announce Grandmother's death on social media.  I'm writing it right now, and I don't know if it's going as it should.  It has quickly become an essay not about her life, but how I'm feeling with her gone, and that's totally self-centered.  But I don't know how else to deal with it.  If I can't talk about how Grandmother affected me, I don't think I can write about this at all, and so I won't be able to tell anyone that she passed.  So I have to write the way I need to write.

I still can't believe she's gone.

Republicans Brought This Shit On Themselves

I didn't think the Senate Republicans would come out with a version of health insurance that's actually, uh, meaner than the House version, but they did.  And saving scoring from the Congressional Budget Office (is that out yet?), because the voters gave Republicans the majority in that house, it'll pass.  And then I've heard that instead of going to committee, the House finds it sufficiently cruel and gives enough tax breaks to the rich that they'll piss on their sadistic version of Trumpcare and pass the Senate's version as is.

All I can say is that the fucking Republicans who voted for these fucking people got what they wanted, even if they weren't paying attention.  All the smart people knew that Republicans were going to go after Obamacare and give tax cuts to the rich.  We tried to stop them; they voted for them anyway.  Most of them are just as poor, if not poorer, than the Democrats who are trying to help them.  And they voted to fuck themselves and the good people of this country in the process.

Like I've always said, the problem isn't really Trump or the Republicans; it's the people who vote for them.  They're The Real Enemies Of America, and they need to be held responsible.

Is This What They Call The Denial Phase?

I just jerked off to some porn.  It felt guuuuuuud.  But I feel guilty for doing.  Well, I always feel guilty after masturbating.  But I think in the back of my mind I'm doing it to avoid thinking about Grandmother ... dying ... you know, I still can't believe it.  But on the other hand I knew it was coming, because she's been in declining health (at least mentally) for a long while and she was getting old.  And yet, from what I heard she was in the hospital for only a week.  She was getting better, and then suddenly she took a turn for the worst and then ... she was gone.

I don't know if I'm dealing with it correctly, if that makes any sense.  I just rubbed one out two or three days after Grandmother died.  Does that make any goddamn sense?

The Republicans And Their Unfair Advantage

Well, on top of everything I'm going through, I see that the Republicans (led by a crazy bitch) won a runoff over the Democrat despite tons of money and attention and the continuing floundering of Republican leadership.  I'm certain voter suppression played a role, but I'm scared if this also is a case of Democrats not showing up for non-Presidential elections.

And now I hear on NPR that Congress is finally looking into Russia interference in the elections.  Unfortunately, since it's Republicans in control and Republicans testifying, they're saying it is -- wait for it -- the fault of Barack Obama and the Democrats.

Fuck you, Republicans.  You people are so goddamn shameless.

Expenses Without Receipts

Doing this now looks strange and even feels inappropriate considering that I learned Grandmother died.  I should talk more about this soon, but I think this is just a coping mechanism, doing this EWR.  Either that or a defense mechanism.  Forgive me.

OK, starting from Tuesday, June 20:

• Well, there are no EWRs until I go back to the 15th, where I finally went to the first party in some time.  I'm making a concerted effort to cut down on them so I can build my nestegg.  But goddammit, I have to rock out with my cock out, and even though I had to finish myself off, it was fun finally cumming all over ***i*'s tits.  I spent way too much money, per usual.  I got two other lappers and I slipped a third $20 because I wanted to get one from her but couldn't because a customer there was about to need CPR (don't ask).  Plus cover is $20 here, and she added on a bedroom fee for my pee-pee touching time with ***i*.  The host was nice, don't get me wrong, but this is too much money, especially when it's not going for my orgasm.  Total: $190.
• Wednesday the 14th -- found a penny head's-up at the East parking ramp at the Mall Of America.  An Infusion of: 1 cent.
• On Tuesday the 13th I went to the library to print out a bunch of things related to a real estate matter in Las Vegas.  Total cost: $1.40.
• Back to Saturday, June 10 ... where I started my night after having family dinner with ice cream.  I wanted to go to Milkjam.  Well, I wanted to walk around and exercise first, then go to Milkjam.  But the exit there was close due to what is becoming intractable construction work.  So after being guided by Waze I saw that Crema was just up the street.  So I parked there and got a sorbet.  With tip: $5.50.
• I then went up the street to Caffetto for the first iced mocha of the summer.  Small.  With tip it amounted to: $4.75.
• And then I went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Version) because I hadn't been there in a while.  Got two dances even though I didn't want to.  But I kind of promised the second one, Brooklyn, that I'd get one from her if I saw her again.  Whoops.  With coffee and tips the total damage was: $47.75.
• On Thursday the 8th I found a dime at work, I think.  An Infusion of: 10 cents.
• Wednesday, June 6 7: Earlier that week ***e* texted me out of the blue asking if she could borrow $60 for groceries.  She's eight months due with her baby and she can't work; meanwhile her man (and yes, she has a man) is, like, out of town somewhere.  Now I remember waiting more than a year for her to fully pay me back the last time I did this.  I may have blogged about this, but I can't find it.  Anyway, I totally forgot how enraged I got with her over that, so I didn't hesitate to say yes.  Oh my God, I am so stupid.  I gave ***e*: $60.
• On Monday, May 29, aka Memorial Day, I celebrated by going to Hooters.  Got a burger there for the first time ever.  And it was slidy and all the stuff kept falling out of it -- a big pet peeve of mine.  Oh, well.  With tip: $17.50.
• To Sunday the 28th, where I spent my morning with a small mocha at Caffetto.  With tip: $4.
• I then spent the afternoon at the library, composing what would become a complaint letter concerning a bad Vegas real estate deal gone down.  Had to print out a complaint and a copy of e-mail correspondence.  Total cost: 30 cents.
• On Saturday the 27th I got a shave at Moler.  The guy who shaved me this time was real good.  With tip it came out to: $9.
• That evening was the United match, and I finally tried the beer created exclusively for the team, Surly North Rising.  Hoppy, like all Surly beers are.  With a hot dog and tip: $17.50.
• After they won I went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Division).  There, a weird chick by the name of Arianna was there.  I remember her from way back; she used to dance at the club but then disappeared.  But, she came back.  Stint in jail, I presume.  She isn't as scary-crazy as she was, but she complained that I didn't give her five bucks' tip stageside.  That I remember.  She didn't remember me, though, even though I made up for my parsimony by getting an LD from her.  With tips for the other three strippers and coffee: $31.75.
• Finally I went to My Favorite Late-Night Italian Place to top off the night.  Think it was just a large salad and soup.  Total with tip: $9.50.
• Tuesday, May 23 -- with a surprise furlough that day early enough in the day, I drove all the way up to home to get a discount ticket to watch Guardians Of The Galaxy 2.  Now I heard everyone rave about the first GOTG, but I didn't understand what the fuss was all about.  It was OK, but not earth-shattering.  For GOTG2, besides hearing it was the best-tested movie ever screened, there wasn't that much hype compared to its predecessor.  And I loved this movie.  It had its bells and whistles, but the best thing about it was how damn emotional it was.  This is a serious movie about parents and the consequences of their actions on their children.  Maybe that is why it resonates with me so much.  But it does, and I think it does it incredibly well.  Grade: A.  Ticket, popcorn and pop equal: $9.64.

I just got the news within the half-hour that Grandmother died.

Don't know how to process this.

Have to go home.  Hope to Buddha that my parents already know.

Histamine Pain; Coughing Conniption

So I looked up while I feel so achy when my nose runs.  I should have looked this up a lot sooner, or maybe I knew intuitively that those two things are correlated and I didn't have to look it up.  But I don't remember hurting all over so bad in the spring, so I had to make sure, and sure enough, yes -- well, possibly -- my reaction to the allergies produces histamine in my body to the point where the build-up has affected my joints.  Maybe my advanced age has made the pain worse, or more noticeable.  There are other factors, but since the hayfever got worse just as my pain worsened, I'll say they go hand-in-hand.

It has gotten a tiny bit better the past couple of days.  Don't know how; I've checked the allergy forecast and the grass pollen will be cranking out non-stop for the next several days.  But the joint pain has backed off.  Now, the worst thing is the coughing.  The snot stuck in my sinuses seeps into the back of my throat and hacking loudly for five, ten seconds.  I've done it at work constantly.  I have been so disruptive that I'm shocked no one has just come over and clubbed me over the head till I'm unconscious.  Trust me -- if someone did that to me, I'd understand.  Late at work yesterday (Sunday) someone came over and gave me a couple cough drops.  I think I gave her a look of offense, but even if she meant it not as nicely as it appears on the surface -- "I can hear you coughing from over here, you really need these" -- I wouldn't blame her.

I'm just still shocked at how the Flunisolide just stopped working last week.  It's killing me.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-Infinity: Lynx, Twins and United FC (Last Week, respectively: -1, -2, and Re-Entry!).

Oh, wow.  Holy fucking wow.  Wow-wow-wow-wow-wow.   Woooooooooooooooooooooow.

I may be overreacting to this.  In fact I know I am.  And I will totally admit that this is largely a gimmick so I can go back to sleep ASAP because, once again, I have to work through the weekend.  (I fell asleep overnight, so this and this other huge task I need to do will have to wait until tonight.)

But I just woke up to see that on Saturday all three professional squads that play this time of year, all of whom played games on Saturday, lost.  All of them.  All fucking three of them.  This is the first time in the survey's history that so many Twin Cities teams lost on the same day in the summer.  It has happened in the winter, the local sports scene's busiest period.  In fact, many local teams have all lost on the same day in, say, January.  You may have heard me bitch about it; I make a point of bitching about it.  But the Twins, United and Lynx doing it at once?  That's an unprecedented level of coordination I was afraid these teams had in them.

I'll start with the team I guess I should end with, because this is somewhat unplanned and I don't want to stain my existence by thinking about this fucking day any longer.  The Jynx suffered the first loss of their season to lowly Connecticut.  What's more humiliating is that somehow this shit happened at home (well, the X -- Target Center is closed for renovations).  The main problem with this 98-93 upset defeat may be something the media alluded to in the Jynx's WNBA Finals loss to the Los Angeles Sparks last year: Center play.  I saw tweets consistently pointing out that that Sylvia Fowles, the last piece to their title year in 2015, was outplayed in the post.  Was that the only reason?  I don't know; I haven't followed the WNBA that closely this year.  But for all my harping over the aging Point Guard position (and aging on this team in general), it's particularly galling for the "latest" acquisition to be the Achilles' heel.

Oh, just noticed this: This loss Saturday was Pride Night.  So you showed the gays how to lose for the first time all year?  How ironic.  More like Shame Night, amirite?  #veal

These motherfuckers were undefeated and lost at home???

Now to the Twinks, who somehow are still leading the AL Central Division.  Or was heading into this weekend, where they not only lost Saturday to the squad chasing them in the division, Cleveland, but lost twice, a day-night doubleheader.  To be charitable, it appears as if the Twinks cheated on the day's matchups by trotting out a pair of newbies to the mound.  In fact, after the first game, Adam Wilk, the call-up Pitcher who got shaken down on the Twinks' way to getting triples, 9-3, was Designated For Assignment.  Wow, what a punishment for sucking.

With Saturday night's 6-2 loss and Friday's 8-1 loss, the Twinks certainly are now behind Cleveland for the division lead.  Not to say that the team's dalliance with the top of the standings was going to last.  But it was still surprising, in fact gob-smacking, to see them leading into the summer.  That means that there is some talent there, and therefore they have some sort of responsibility to keeping up the good play.  However, it seems readily apparent that they simply are outmatched against superior teams, such as Cleveland and, earlier this season, Houston.  (Oh yeah: They failed to sweep the Giants in San Francisco, and mid-week the split four with Seattle; they went a ghastly 2-6 this screening week.)  Guess it was good while it lasted.

Meanwhile, back on Monday the organization picked first in the Major League Baseball Draft for the first time since 2001 (?), when they picked Joe Mauer.  There were three prime candidates that many predicted would go first.  As a beleaguered Twin Cities sports fan could guess, the Twinks selected none of those three.  Instead, they reached; they selected an Infielder named Royce Lewis out of high school in California.  The last Shortstop picked that high?  Derek Jeter.  And anonymously one scout said that Lewis could be the next Jeter.  Uh, I'm going to think pessimistically and say that the Twinks should have went with conventional wisdom and took either heat-throwing Cali Pitcher Hunter Greene, Vanderbilt ace Kyle Wright, or Louisville First Baseman Brendan McKay.  But that's just me.

Finally, Untied (ooh, I just made up that mean nickname right now!) fell at Real Salt Lake with a Goal in the 84th minute.  Which ... well, this is an expansion club, so I'm not too bent out of shape over this loss.  But it triply sucks since EVERY OTHER GODDAMN TEAM IN THE TWIN CITIES LOST ON SATURDAY JESUS WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!?!?!

OK, what's coming up for these guys ... Jynx play host to Washington Friday ... Twinks try to salvage some dignity playing Cleveland this afternoon, then host the White Sox for three, then visit Cleveland over the weekend ... Untied play two league games for the first time in one week in squad history, hosting Portland Wednesday and Vancouver Saturday.

God, being a sports fan in this town fucking sucks.

Dilemma; Which One?

I need to start thinking about looking for work.  I've been blessed to get this deep into summer and still work full-time hours.  Normally I'd be out on my behind shortly after Memorial Day.

Nevertheless, it appears as though the season in both test scoring places is coming to a close.  How I close with them is my current dilemma.

The last huge project I had during the day came to an end early this week.  Well, after putting a lot of hours and working through the weekend.  But late last week I was notified that starting Monday I was shifting to another project, one that appears to be late and needed people.  I guess I could have refused, but it's assumed that I didn't have a problem moving, and I don't.  I was told that there would have been only two or three days of work after we got done with the huge chunk of work, and I was told that this late project was going to go on for longer than that.  So I jumped at the chance.  I've been working full-time hours and we're still so behind that we are working this weekend, too.

But then the other test scoring place, the one where I last worked nights for them, magically called me up Wednesday.  When I left I told the contact person that if anything dropped in to give me a call, but I never really expected her to do that, or for something to come in.  Something did -- a math project, which would only last a week, but this place pays a quarter/hour more and is much closer.

Here's the problem, or at least here was the problem as of a couple days ago.  The project I'm working on now really doesn't have an end date.  They need it done as soon as possible; when seems to be a mystery to everyone I talk to.  Moreover, this project is part of a huge conglomerate of projects in all subjects (writing and social studies and math) that have been woefully behind.  There is/was talk that as soon as we're done with this, we're jumping onto yet another project the company needs bodies for, and God knows when that'll be finished.  Lot of panicking means a lot of work for me, chronically unemployable me, who has to make hay while the sun shines.  But they don't know for sure about that, either.  In other words, they don't know much about anything.  We've just been working until told to stop, and that's not a great way to make a living.

Meanwhile, there is one huge drawback to this math project.  It is a field test, which are questions that kids have answered but don't count.  Those are questions that are being workshopped, in essence, to see if they work or not.  I like these because after we grade the answers we are asked for feedback for how did these students answer and whether or not this would be a good question.  I will say that it feels as though the state Departments of Education never take our advice and go with the question that is most often misinterpreted by the kids.  Nevertheless, I love giving my opinion, and I feel good about the illusion of power.

Anyway, the problem with these sorts of projects is that the drop-dead date can vary wildly.  I have only done one field test with this particular company before, probably in my first year, and it seemed like it went on for a long time, though I don't remember the particulars.  My more recent run-ins with field tests have been at the other place, the company where I'm working now, and -- well, I got fucked and fucked and fucked.  This is a different company, and yet I'm not entirely certain we're going to last a whole week.  We might not less even half a week.

So there's a calculus in my head based on incomplete information that I needed to make this decision: Do I stick with the current company through whenever this current project ends in the hopes that I get moved onto the next project, or do I bounce and take this field test job which is also of indeterminate length?

I had until Friday to tell the other company my plans.  In the meantime, after asking around I got two definitely maybes about my future of working there.  One, this current project should end either Monday or Tuesday.  And two -- and I got this news Friday morning -- they will not be moving people onto a new project after the one I'm currently on ends.  It appears as though I'll be done for the season with these guys.

Those two pieces of news, especially the second one, convinced me to tell these guys that I have a job interview Monday and a dental appointment Tuesday, and therefore I will just leave before the project is over.  I'll work through the weekend, but that is it.  And I will hope that the field test I will be working on is more like the one I did with those guys seven years ago and not the ones from the other company each of the past two years.  The break-even point seems to be Tuesday.  It feels as though that if we get cut loose, we'll get cut loose that day.  And Tuesday is the day of the week where, if we reach Tuesday, any money I might lose for getting cut loose on that day while the other company continues to chug (possibly) through the end of the day will be negligible and thus acceptable.

Oh yeah ... I thought I'd be done with everything by now.  That's why I set up an experiment at the U. next Thursday.  I still might make it even with the projected work dates for this field test.  I'll know for certain, maybe, Tuesday as to whether we'll last through then or if I'll have to reschedule.

Hey, who knows?  Test companies are allowed to screw over temps like us.  I could certainly be making the wrong decision.  We'll see, I'm afraid.

Oh, by the way: My old scoring room, the one that had only two or three days of work after I left there, is still working.  In fact, they're coming in today.  Maybe they're slow, maybe they were given work.  Regardless, if I had stayed, it wouldn't have been the worst thing in the world.

Addendum To: This Ends A Four-Blog Post Streak Where I Don't Put In A Title ...

I don't think the Flunisolide works anymore.  The ticket at the back and top of my throat has spread up to my sinuses.  Worse yet, I'm blowing my nose again.  The Flunisolide usually stuffs up all the snot, but ever since, oh, yesterday afternoon my nose has been running.

It got even worse once I got home from the party I went to last night.  I started to get chills in only some parts of my body.  It was hot, though, so I didn't open the window.  I felt tired and, well, sick enough to sleep early, but I slept with only shorts on, and I didn't sleep under my bed.  And yet I still felt both too hot and too cold.  Meanwhile my ear canals started to itch, something I only got when I ate oranges when I was a kid.  I started to really cough over the phlegm I have stuck in my mouth.  The histamine reaction from  my body gave me pains all over.  And in the two or three times I slept and then woke up overnight (including a time where I finally relented and opened the window) I started to get a bad sinus headache.  Maybe I ate or drank too much last night.

The headaches, for the most part, are gone as I type this.  The runny nose and blowing of said nose, however, is not.  I spritzed up before going to bed last night and it's failing.  It's not going to help fight the allergies this afternoon either, is it?

Politicize The Shit Out Of This

I had a take on the mass shooting.  But then I saw Colbert, and now I have a different and better take.

But first -- so yeah, another mass shooting.  This one of a Congressman.  This time, however, it's a Republican, and that totally changes things.

I mean that seriously.  Ever since Trump's been elec ... no, wait, ever since Obama was elected, most politically-based and hate-based shootings and mass shootings were perpetrated on minorities, namely Muslims.  This is the first time I can remember where the victim -- and possibly the target victim -- was a Republican.  Those last two sentences may seem not to have any relation with each other.  You know goddamn well they have everything to do with each other.

Steve Scalise is in critical condition, but also in stable condition, so he'll live.  Credit goes out to the capitol police, trained shooters who murdered this white domestic terrorist ... who, believe it or not, happens to be a Democrat, and is in fact a Bernie Bro who snapped when Trump and the Republicans swept into power in November (with the help of Russia and voter suppression).  He wasn't the only one.  This James Hodgkinson fellow railed against the rich for years ... and he isn't the only one.  Besides his long history of running afoul of the law (including dragging his foster daughter around ... dude sounds like a Republican), he actually was thinking the same way many of us have been thinking.

Well, thinking -- we didn't actually purchase a gun and use it.  But hey, he was a hunter and avid gun owner.  Also, he was in Virginia, known to have the most lax gun purchasing laws in the United States (and that's saying something).  And Hodgkinson has in the past scorned Scalise in the past ... who, and it has to be said, received an A+ rating from the National Rifle Association.

Easy access to weapons, made law by the Republican party.  And one mentally ill nut decides to use that easy access against one of their own.  Seriously, what the fuck did you expect?

---

I don't want to downplay what happened to Scalise.  But everyone there is going to live.  Meanwhile, a few hours after that shooting on a ball field, on the other side of the country, in a UPS facility in San Francisco, a disgruntled ex-employee bursts in and murders three workers before killing himself.  Charlie Pierce said it one way, but I'll go a step further: This is much more important than what happened to Scalise and his staff because people in the UPS facility were killed.  Innocent people, not just because of a guy who decided to kill but, more importantly, because that killer had an accessible way to make good and commit to the ultimate act of violence.  But it'll be forever forgotten because it happened on the same day a Representative got shot.

I rely -- maybe even demur -- to Pierce a lot.  But he's right.  Why is one person getting shot more "valued" than another?  Is it because he was elected to office?  If you lose your life, that seems a very flimsy difference.

My thoughts and prayers go out to the family and friends of the three people murdered by that human in San Francisco.

---

I was having trouble formulating my thoughts on this, but then I saw Colbert (and later Meyers) talk about unity and bipartisanship and coming together, and this stupid baseball game that's supposed to happen today  between two parties, one of which has gridlocked the federal government for decades now.  Bullshit.

This shooting of Steve Scalise is the result of a deadly cocktail of Republicans expanding gun rights to suck the NRA's dick for money, then Republicans fomenting race wars to induce white people to buy more guns.  The chickens came home to roost.

The left-wide media ombundsman Mediaite put out a list of the worst left-wing tweets reacting to the shooting.  That came after they published a list of the worst coming from the right.  I'm looking at this list.  Most of the tweets are talking about how Scalise is a whore for the NRA and I'm going, what's so crazy about that?  I don't see any of those tweeters going nuts.  They're just pointing out irony, or the fact that a gun nut Representative got shot for advocating the easy gun laws he has dedicated his political career to advancing, or reminding people that Scalise spoke at a white supremacist meeting once, easily (and correctly) predicting "thoughts and prayers" go out to the victims, blah-blah-blah.  They're totally right.

Meanwhile, right-wing media and Republicans have flipped their shit over this.  There are conspiracy theories all over the place after the shooting.  Look at this shit from Mediaite: Conservatives are saying that weeks and weeks of hate have resulted in this terrorist attack.  And Republicans are blaming Democrats, Kathy Griffin, the staging of Julius Caesar at Shakespeare In The Park, and Snoop Dogg for this shooting.  What the fuck does Snoop Dogg have to do with this?  And one Republican prick said that the blood is on Democrats' hands.  Man, no one does projecting and blaming the victim like Republicans.

This is the reasoning behind me being disappointed that Stephen Colbert and Seth Meyers have decided that this is a time for "unity."  This is no time for unity.  Politicize the shit out of this!  Because that thought leads to looking inward and assessing your own mistakes, and that leads to Both Sides Do It.  Both sides don't do it.  Only one party, the Republican party, wants guns for everyone (including wife beaters and domestic terrorists).  Only one party, the Republican party, has started a media-industrial complex based on bullshit conspiracy theories made up in people's own addled heads.  Only one party, the Republican party, has poisoned the federal government to the point of paralysis.  Only one party, the Republican party, has adherents who have committed terrorist attacks on American soil since 9/11.

And now I hear that we should all take a step back and be civil towards one another?  One fucking party started this.  This is the time for those Republicans to be held responsible for these fucking crazy gun laws.  This is the time for them to realize that it's their tax cuts that have created class warfare.  This is the time for those people to start apologizing for starting and exploiting people who believe in conspiracy theories about Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton and even devote their waking hours to watching a network dedicated to those conspiracy theories.  This is the time of those goddamn Republicans to stop being selfish, arrogant and cruel assholes, and to finally start running the government on all our behalf, not just for theirs and the rich people they want to become.  And it sure as hell no time for a baseball game.

This pause to reflect is just an opening for Republicans to continue doing their worst.  They have all the levers of federal government and, if you haven't been paying attention, the Senate is crafting a bill repealing Obamacare in secret while the House is giddily stripping financial protection for consumers by killing Dodd-Frank.  And there's still the Russia investigation going on -- that seems to be more important than a guy who's going to live, isn't it?  But the Republicans are going to clutch their pearls and say, "Oh, this is no time for us to hammer at President Trump.  A Congressman has gotten shot!"  And I'm really scared that the Democrats, in the name of peace, are going to roll over, like they usually do, and that will allow Republicans to get away with treason and fuck the middle class -- guys like James Hodgkinson -- all over again.

I've got to be honest.  Unless Scalise or the staff members who've been shot have their lives severely affected by this I'm going to save my sympathies.  Instead, my sympathies go to the families of the 13 kids killed at Columbine, or the 32 killed at Virginia Tech, or the 49 killed in Orlando, or the 26 killed, most of them young children, in Newtown.  My sympathies do not go out to a man in power whose beliefs and actions allow this to happen.

But because I have to go along to get along: Thoughts and prayers and blah-blah-blah.

This Ends A Four-Blog Post Streak Where I Don't Put In A Title ...

... but I don't have much to talk about.  I just want to note that starting about yesterday afternoon, I've had this weird sore throat that seems to have started on the top of the back of my throat, if you can visualize that.  I don't exactly know when I got it, but I think it was over the course of work.  I was just looking at an essay, then I felt that part get sore.  I often get it when I'm producing a lot of phlegm, but I'm not blowing my nose -- thank Buddha for Flunisolide.  It just hurts to swallow.  And I feel like spitting up a lot.  Sometimes, when I do, I get this huge blob of spit, and then it's done; my throat's not sore anymore.  Not getting that in this case.  Frustrates the hell out of me.

Just want to note that.

So I guess the new project is going as swimmingly as possible.  I qualified and all that, and so I am staring at essay after essay (better ones than before, however) whenever I am not spacing out.

Things are kind of slapdash when it comes to leadership.  We have no nametags; neither do the two people who, I guess, are leading this project, or at least our room where we are working on this particular question.  When I had a question about one of the questions, one of the people pointed me to the other ... because she had yet to qualify to grade that question herself.  Great, now we're back to this fucking situation again.

The room boss (who may or may not be certified to be a room boss) has called me over to look over a pair of essays I have scored erroneously, by his estimation.  The first one was a matter of perspective; the second one I was tougher than I guess I should be.  He says I'm doing well.  If I were doing well, I wouldn't be called over.  I know he's doing his job, but getting called over two times in as many days may mean I'm not doing my job.

Well, shit, I need the money, so out goes my principles.

Grandmother's grandson, whom I'm friends with on Facebook, Messengered me overnight.

Since I was dead asleep from yesterday evening till this morning, I didn't get it.  I didn't check Messenger until I got back home today.  And since this message was overnight, I am scared as hell as to what this could be.

I'm avoiding looking at it.  I think I'll do so overnight tonight, probably after the game.  If the news is bad, best to get it in the middle of the night, without any distractions, before I have to go to work in the morning.

Buddha, I'm so scared of what this message might be.

And now I fell asleep in the middle of the hockey game and woke up about a half-hour ago.  Just slept for, uh ... 9 1/2 hours?  Feels great, but I don't know if I can find a new pair of shorts to wear for the week.  No wonder I'm behind when it comes to doing crap.  Wish me luck!

Let me just say that I should not have eaten those seventh and eighth pieces of pizza last night.  I mean, Pizza Hut is soooooo good, but ugghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. ...

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey (Scheduled Post)

Want to note that we have reached the fallow season of the WMNSS, where only two-to-three teams will appear on any given week.

#-1: Lynx (Last Week: -1).  In the only game of the screening week, the Lynx remain undefeated and the only undefeated team in the WNBA by throttling the Washington Mystics Friday by 25.  But with that victory comes this fact that struck me dumb on the ass: Lindsey Whalen now becomes the winningest player in league history.  She passes Swin Cash (someone I follow on Twitter) with 295 wins.  That is really, really crazy!

I still think this team is on the wrong side of Father Time, but they're not showing it yet.  And they probably won't show it this week, as they travel to Dallas Sunday and host Connecticut Saturday.

#-2: Twins (Last Week: -3).  I believe that the Twins are back in first place in the American League Central Division as of right now.  And this road trip has been, overall, good.  Sunday they squeezed past the Angels, 3-2, to win three-out-of-four games.  They then lost a three-game series in Seattle mostly because Brandon Kintzler chocked on a one-run lead in the bottom of the ninth and lost Wednesday's middle game, 6-5.  And they will be going for a sweep at San Francisco today/Sunday.

Pitching has to be a huge difference between last year and this.  With his 4-0 shutout of The Bastard New York Giants Friday, I saw one tweet that said that Ervin Santana accounted for 23% of Major League Baseball's Complete-Game Shutouts (at least as of end of Friday).  On Saturday, Jose Berrios once again lasted half as long (5 1/3 innings) but burned twice as bright while doing it (eight Strikeouts) as Kintzler shut the door on a 3-2 win.  Lineup has turned around, too, with Miguel Sano, the A.L.'s leading vote-getter so far for Third Base, finally getting into a groove.

Hot take that I may expound on later: Terry Ryan actually did a good job redeveloping this organization, and was fired way too quickly.

After finishing a long road trip in the Bay, they will begin an extended homestand starting Monday, where they host the Mariners for four.  They will then play a four-game series vs. Cleveland over three days; the two clubs will squeeze in a doubleheader to make up for the postponed contest on April 19.

Hot Heads In The Summer

Assholes are being rude today.  They're rude everyday, who am I kidding.  But something about the first real heat wave of the season has brought out the bitchiness in everyone, including me.

---

I have to get this out if I haven't yet: I hate drivers who go around me and quickly switch back onto my lane with barely a car length between us.  You may be fast, but if so, you should be fast enough to put a hell of a lot more distance between us if you do that.

This comes when I went to work this morning.  I was just minding my own business, driving 70 on the left lane, when all of a sudden (which usually happens) a fast car materializes behind my ass.  This gray or silver Corvette doesn't skip a beat when it veers right and coasts ahead of me.  I was afraid of what might happen next, and the asshole did it: He cut back in front of me, right back in front of me, even though there wasn't a car in front of me or in front of him for at least 75 yards.

Do you know why they do that?  I have developed a theory.  Asshole drivers like him believe they are entitled to their own lane on the highway, and if someone dares to venture onto it, they'll quickly "reclaim" it as soon as they are able.  So it didn't matter that he dusted my ass, or could have stayed at 100 on the lane to my right.  No, as soon as humanly possible, this piece of shit was going to take back what was his.  Fucking baby.

And the worst thing about this is is that it happened so fast I couldn't get the license plate.  I caught a glimpse, but I was too concentrated on the road to focus on the plate, and by the time I did, he was off.  I fucking hate that; of all the cars to keep track of, it's guys like those, the rude speedsters, that need to be tracked the most.  And they're the hardest to nail down.

Next time, next time. ...

---

It spilled over to my time after eating Pizza Hut with my parents for dinner.  I stopped by the gas station for gasoline and Powerball tickets.  The slow motherfucker ahead of me thought it was economical to buy all his pop at the gas station, a half-dozen bottles.  After he got rang up, he sauntered back down the aisle to browse for more things.  He then wanted cigarettes after the checkout lady gave him his total.  And then he took a solid half-minute to do something with the bag of pop, either rearrange them or get a handle on the handles.  It was fucking ridiculous, and I was waiting, just waiting, for the girl to just take my Powerball slip.

So I was pissed.  Maybe she was too.  My order (tickets and gas) wasn't complicated, but apparently there were people behind her, and she was swamped.  She was getting a little pissy too.  I don't think she said hi to me when this slow prick finally got out of the way.  She finally called for help.  And our dueling pissed-offness was on full display when she tried to put the receipt I requested on the counter and I moved my hand vigorously enough to take it out of her hand.  And she did say "have a nice night," I think, and I didn't answer.

I take responsibility for my part in not being civil.  I wasn't, wasn't really.  I don't think she was all that great, either.  Dammit, this is the place where I get gasoline.  I will see her again, because I have to.  Man, I hope the both of us can see eye-to-eye next time, without full hearts, and blame the asshole that caused this goddamn mess in the first place.

---

And I saw one car scoot across lanes through just after a red light turned green.  And there was an asshole car that cut me off on the way to Caffetto, where I'm blogging this.

Cooler weather's coming, but not tomorrow.  Severe weather's coming then.  In fact, there is this derecho coming in in the morning.  The straight-line winds could be horrible.

Hot time, summer in the city. ...

Drilling Down On One Target

We have two questions we answer in this project.  There are tens of thousands of each question to answer.  We are finished with one, and we are now tackling the other.

When I started with this company, we had a project where we had an array of seven questions to answer.  I was part of a huge room; half of us took three, the other half took three, and we all shared on a seventh.  (I think that in the four years I was there, this was the case, number of questions the same.)  That means that we had four questions tens of thousands of kids would answer to, and we would have almost a month to get through them all.  I think I'm good at my job, but it gets tedious.  And yet, if I recall correctly, the room boss (soon to be my boss, period) decided that the best way to get through the entire project was to switch off -- during the course of the day we would go from one question to the other.

That strategy was entirely by necessity; there were some kids whose answers were more important to go through than others, and since those answers were scattered among all seven questions, we had no choice but to do all seven questions until those much-needed answers were graded by us.  But by doing that, I think we were kept on our toes.  And that's a good thing.  We didn't get bogged down on question to the point of eye-rolling boredom.  We may have needed a quick refresher on what to look for whenever we switched, but this was something new to look forward to as we went through our day.

It has been said that it's best to just work on one question until it's done.  Honestly, if she had her druthers, my boss on the very first project would have done it that way, too.  The argument that concentrating on one keeps you laser-focused on what types of things to look for, which makes your grading more accurate, however, feels like a canard to me.  I don't get familiar with seeing hundreds of answers to the same question hour after hour; I get bored.  I lose focus.  I kind of get cranky.

My room boss for this project last year switched off.  I think.  We switched off early in the project this year.  However, for the past two weeks, we concentrated.  It took us almost a week to go through and eliminate one question.  We are now about two-thirds of the way through the other, and we have been told we have to be done by Sun ... uh, Monday.

Can't come soon enough.  First of all, for some damn reason I have been forced into another assignment.  There was some work for me for a few days next week, but instead I am starting a new project (or an old project I started at the Mall Of America ... oh, who the hell knows) Monday.  Maybe I shouldn't care.  But we've been at this same damn question for three days now, and we have expended up to 13 hours of each day in order to complete it.  I still feel kind of unmoored over how to score each kid's essay correctly, but I can tell you that I'm not getting any sharper with repeated "practice."  In fact, I might be getting worse.  Damn kids don't know how to write an essay.  They don't even know how to answer the question they're supposed to answer.  I am frequently lost as to how low the scores should be.  And I ask myself that question time and time again, hour upon hour, for (if you include the other question) about a fortnight now.

But there is one other drawback to working on just one question.  It has to do with the end of the project.  All that stands between us and the end of work (well, at least until this new project begins -- this may no longer be a worry, but I still want to ruminate on this point) is this single question.  There are many stacks of papers until that end, but they all look the same.  So we have one single, straight line to this project's oblivion, a destination we can clearly, well, laser-focus on without too much effort.  And when you can see clearly what type of question (question singular) is left to be done, when the amount of those questions really doesn't matter ... well, you can see the end from pretty far away.  And ever since we switched over on Tuesday, I've been counting down the days until this project's end ... and my need to find more work.

We would not have really had this problem if we had two questions left to do.  Not only do I think we'd be fresher and be more excited to jump from one query to the other and back, I think I at least would get the impression that there is a lot of stuff left to be done.  So, if we had the same amount of papers left to do now, but split between both questions, well, it'd feel like we're plenty busy.  And that makes me concentrate on the fact that we would have a lot left to do, not what is left to do.  I think it's a big difference.

But no, we did one, then the other, and it doesn't really matter because we may or may not get done this weekend, and that doesn't matter because I'm getting overtime, and it really, really doesn't matter because I bounce to a new project (however long it is, have no clue) after the weekend.  Still sad, though.

Of Food And Judgement

OK, so two things at work today:

1) I brought in Oreos for snacking for the room.  Two bags.  Our room is at the end of a hallway where four rooms, lined up railroad apartment-style, have been partitioned.  Going into work or coming back from breaks/lunch, I walk past each of the other three rooms and I see a table filled with treats -- bananas, cookies, someone brought in damn chocolate cake.  And then I get to our room and we have fuckin' Ritz crackers that the Project Manager bought the day before.  I have no goddamn clue why no one in our room is fucking buying treats to share.  Are the scorers in my room all cheap?  Are they all assholes?  Could they be cheap assholes?

Went off on a tangent.  Anyway, I had a feeling that I would be the only person bringing in food for the room, and since we were warned that there would be no rations coming for people staying till 7, I wanted to play the hero, dammit.  I brought out the first bag just before lunch.  Those Oreos were virtually gone shortly after lunch.  I laid out the second bag just before afternoon break.  Those Oreos were virtually gone shortly after afternoon break.  Damn parasites.

However, shortly after I laid out the lunch Oreos and went back to my seat, one of the other test scorers stood up to use the bathroom.  The treat table was on her way out.  I have a vantage point to the table, and I could see the Oreos, and therefore I could see who was eating them.  I look often that way today.  I had to, because I'm vain.  Anyway, this woman looks at the Oreos ... and she shakes her damn head.  WTF?  Why are you shaking your head?  Do you not like Oreos?  Do you believe they're not a healthy snack to give to the room?  How about minding your own damn business if you don't like the Oreos, huh?  And by the way, since that bag and the one after it were hoovered up in less than an hour, I say that your anti-Oreo stance is in the vanishing minority, thank you!

---

2) Still smarting from getting misled about pizza.  My room boss was truthful yesterday, at least, when she said that there would be no treats furnished for free by the company for late-stayers tonight.

However, around lunchtime, I saw my room boss and two of her lieutenants (one of which my immediate supervisor) sneak out of the room en masse, and they had these guilty smirks on their faces.  And shortly thereafter, they came back with food, a huge plate of food.  I think there was hot flesh on there.  You know, maybe like pepperoni or sausage.

I suspect those plates of food where bought by the PM to give to leadership for their help in the project.  It was not for us proletariat, that's for damn sure.  If that is true, you know, that really chaps my hide.  There they sit, promising us worker bees pizza and then not delivering nor saying why not, and then they waltz back into the room with a bunch of starving and poor drones with the free food they once said we'll be having.  Yeah, I understand that any of us can bring treats to the room, and the fact that I'm virtually the only doing so means the room is partly to blame.  Partly.  But that does not mean that they can blindly eat an extra lunch without knowing that it gives the perception that they're hoarding free food all for themselves.  Really, do they not remember or care that they said we'd get pizza?  In that context, getting food right while we're working is incredibly tone-deaf.  I understand leadership getting rewarded in a way we don't.  That's totally fine.  But if you do, do it away from us, for God's sake.  Eat at the end of the day, or even eat a separate room.  But don't lord that shit over us.  It only makes us hungrier and more pissed that you lied to us.

---

Rants over.

I Detect A Pattern Of Lies

The more I think about this, the angrier I get about this.

For tonight and tomorrow night, the test scoring project is extending hours at work.  To 13 hours.  As I had said before, I am chronically unemployable, so I have to make hay while the sun is shining, and therefore I am going to do all 26 hours if it kills me.  And it might.

Earlier this week I asked if there was going to be pizza offered in the evening for those pulling these yeoman's hours.  That is what happened at least once, if not twice, when this test scoring project went into the night like this last season.  I think this is a perfectly reasonable concession by the company.

My room boss made inquiries, and a couple days ago she said that there will be pizza.  A great thing to look forward to when your eyes are glazing over at 6 in the evening.  And so I waited tonight, and waited.  Then, much to my surprise comes the Project Manager coming in with groceries.  Vegetable plates and hummus and shit.

Appetizer?

As we the minutes went on, the answer to that rhetorical question became an emphatic fuck no.  This is the inducement, the reward, the thank-you we got from the company tonight.  Not greasy pizza.  Carrots.  Broccoli.  Triscuits.  Ranch dip.  Rectangular pats of cheese.  Cold snack food.

You fucking kidding me?

I don't care that we don't have a contract saying that they have to give us pizza.  And it's not as if we have been given food every time we work beyond the normal 9-to-5.  For example, this place used to provide bagels on weekends.  Not anymore, but hey, like I said, I can't work anywhere else, so I deal.

But this one is different.  When the room boss said that she confirmed that there will be pizza, the company made a promise: We.  Are.  Entitled.  To.  Pizza.  I don't know if my room boss changed her mind or if someone above her pulled rank.  But goddammit, I assumed that we were going to get pizza because the entire room was told we would get it.  And we didn't get it.  So I and we are justified in thinking we just got royally fucked in the ass.

It gets worse.  Tomorrow we're not even supposed to get veggies and dip.  My room boss said that there would be no treats Thursday night.  "Make sure you bring food," she said.  We stay 13 goddamn hours and this is the fucking thanks we get?

---

Another reason I am angry is because this is the second "promise" they decided not to keep.  Remember when I blogged a couple weeks ago that we were going to be switched to a new project until the papers for our project were scanned in?  Well, we never got around to that project.  When we were called back from furlough, it was the old project, the one we're doing now.  I'm not that bent out of shape that we were misled on what project we were doing.  But I can nonetheless chalk this up to someone changing his/her/their mind(s) and not telling us.

I detect a pattern of lies with this company, something that is much more virulent and consistent than any of the other shenanigans I have had to deal from this company.  I don't like it.  We have been screwed in two ways over the course of this same project.  And whether it be incompetence or malevolence, I really, really don't like to be treated unfairly like this.  Yeah, I'm getting pissed off over not getting pizza.

---

We were told yesterday (Tuesday) that after our current project is done, we will be switched over to another project that has fallen behind.  That is supposed to start next week.  Thursday, actually ... even though Thursday is supposed to be the end date of our current project.

I no longer believe them.  I think we're losing our jobs next Wednesday.  Hope I'm wrong.  But fuck it, I'm still hoping for fucking pizza.

The Bomb-Ass Russian At Work

I have to say I lucked out with this day scoring project.  In the same room -- through clear across it -- is a really hot babe.  She is by far the hottest one there, but it took one day a couple weeks ago to notice her.  She was walking, I think, out of the room, and she was wearing tight clothing (she always wears tight clothes) and I noticed that her sweater puppies are fucking huge.  And her tight yoga pants emphasized her buxom, hourglass shape, which may just be as hot on her as her big tits.  Maybe.

I haven't stopped noticing her since -- whenever she shows up for work, at least.  She always saunters in late, she walks fast and she has no problems walking past slower walkers on the way into the room.  In other words, typical Russian.  (She has a Russian name so I assume she's from Russia -- I've never heard her speak.)  But she doesn't have to talk or even interact with me for me to get some major schwing action going on!  Schwing!

I Am Chronically Unemployable

My day project probably will wrap up in the next two weeks.  Despite massive delays to start, they still say we're wrapping up general scoring this week.  I worked this weekend, we can work 11-hour days this week, and there's a chance that we can work past 11 hours this week as well as work next weekend.  I don't see the rush, but if they say there's a deadline, well, there's a deadline.

Also, today is the last day of my night project.  We can start at 5, but we have to be there at 5:30.  Yet that is all moot, because from my estimation there is, at most, an hour's worth of work to do.  We could be done by a quarter to 6, honestly.  I still might come in at 5:30, because there is no way we are working past tonight (which, in an aside, was our scheduled drop-dead date, which shocks the hell out of me, because I thought we would be done by last week), and so I might as well get as many hours today at the day test scoring place to get me that much closer past 40 hours and into overtime.

Anyway, what I'm saying is is that barring any other projects (and the season is, unfortunately, winding down), in two week test scoring is over and I am -- gulp -- back to looking for a job.  It's the same situation I dealt with last year, having about three months where I had nothing to do.  And yet it feels so unfamiliar, and thus very scary, to do.  I'll have to go back to my ruse of getting up in the morning to a job that is non-existent, and instead cobbling together time at the coffeeshop, library and gym to make it through the day (although working out sounds very appealing now since I haven't done it in months).

In September the health insurance company will ramp up help for open enrollment, and for the third season I'll be back there.  Maybe.  That was the place I applied for a job a couple months ago and got rejected.  And since this is in the same floor I worked at, I would not put it past the people who do the hiring to not hire me again this time around.  It would be extremely awkward to go around my day and see the woman who deemed me unfit for this job.  If two years of working diligently for her isn't enough commitment, why the hell should I care about impressing her now?  And maybe those people feel the same way, and therefore won't hire me back.  Won't say that's a complete impossibility.

I have e-mailed a couple of my temp agencies about my current plight; beyond going to the dentist and finding the time to do an experiment at the U., and then taking a week off in August to catch the solar eclipse, I am free right now.  And if there is a job that is longer-term, say 18 months (or, better yet, permanent), I'll take it in a heartbeat.  But if not, I'm out in the cold.  Let's just say that I'm not holding my breath.

When I learned that I didn't get the health insurance job, my future came into starker focus.  I kind of realized that being a temp for two decades, keeping my options open and hoping that the perfect job for me would fall right in my lap, wasn't seen as such a positive in other people's eyes.  It may be a detriment, even a handicap.  And so I am fast coming to the conclusion that I am chronically unemployable.  Maybe I have dedicated my whole life to temporary assignments that have no benefits that people only see me now as a person who works temporary assignments that have no benefits.  Maybe, by keeping my options open, I in fact have closed them all.

Maybe it is time to go back to school.  Where have I heard that before?  But by God, I'm 41 years old.  If people don't think they should hire a guy that old for a full-time job, what difference does it make for a guy my age to go back to school?

No ... maybe I'll just do what I've always done: Lie to my parents, spend the day aimlessly but happily, go home and be grateful I have my parents and this house for another day, and sleep.  And wait for the health insurance company to hire me anyway, or not, and I might try to find a new job, or not.

It is what it is, and I ain't what I ain't.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Lynx (Last Week: -1).  Yesterday/Saturday could have been a sports day as depressing as many days in January are: All local sports teams in action, all losing.  (I have to make a daily compilation about that one of these days.)  The three pro teams were playing yesterday, the Lynx, Twins and United, although they were all on the road, and to think all three teams could have lost at home.

Anyway, two of them lost.  Guess which squad didn't?  Yep, they crushed Seattle by 23 at KeyArena, which "followed" a 14-point victory over San Antonio at the X on Sunday.  And they remain the only undefeated team in the WNBA.  As it has been the past several years, it's looking like it's the playoffs or bust.  I think.

Hmmm, there's a lot of space inbetween games in the league.  The Lynx visit Washington Friday.

#-2: United FC (Last Week: -3).  No Kevin Molino, no Johan Venegas, (both players were called up by their countries to play for them), and no Goals as the Loons get emasculated at Kansas City, 3-0.  I really have nothing else to say except that I need to keep things in perspective and that an expansion year may be the only time it's OK not to win a title (see below).  This side and the whole of Major League Soccer have an "international break"; they play at Salt Lake City on the 17th.

#-3: Twins (Last Week: -2).  What happened Sunday and Monday may be The Turning Point of the season, and even if there were no expectations for this club coming into 2017, what was a promising start feels as though it could put them into a tailspin into oblivion.

On Sunday the Twinks had a two-run lead going into the top of the ninth inning against the Tampa Bay Rays and Brandon Kintzler allowed two runs to the Bay Rays before Tampa won it, 8-6, in, like, 13 or 15 innings or something.  What's worse came the next day, when the Twinks had a, what, six-run lead against Houston (and by the way, both games were at Target Field) going into the eighth and the bullpen allowed, what, a dozen runs to the 'Stros as the game went from a rout one way to the other, 16-8?  It was the first time in Houston Astros history that they were down by at least six runs going into the eighth and won.  They were in almost 700 games where that situation occurred, and Monday was the first time they won.  And of course they did it against our team.

So yeah, that set them on a home sweep by Houston, The Best Team In Baseball.  (That also extends a weird statistics regarding the Twinks: Although they have played many more games at home, they have won more games on the road.)  And the bullpen, not that good to begin with, is now completely gassed.  But somehow they went to Anaheim and broke a four-game losing streak that began Sunday with back-to-back wins over The Los Angeles Angels Of Anaheim Angels Of Los Angeles Angels Of ...  Nevertheless I have to note the 7-2 loss last/Saturday night.  The pivotal, if not historic, moment came when supposed ace Ervin Santana, who already allowed two solo shots to make it a 3-1 deficit, was pitching in the fourth to Albert Pujols with the bases loaded.  And, sure enough, because Minnesota is nothing if not givers, Santana's 2-1 pitch was sent by Pujols just over the Left Field Line for a Grand Slam.  That not only broke the game open, but that was Pujols' 600th Home Run of his career.  He becomes only the ninth player in baseball history to do that, and the first of those nine to reach it via grand slammie.  And of course he did it against a Minnesota team.

These guys stay on the road and on the West Coast this screening week.  After playing in Orange County today/Sunday, they play three in Seattle and start a three-game series in San Francisco.

#-4: Wild (Re-Entry!).  These guys are here for two reasons.  (Well, I should add that I kind of meant to put these guys in last week's survey, but I forgot, and since then I found another reason.  OK.)  The first reason is that the Nashville Predators are now the most successful of the four expansion teams from the last wave of expansion.  That should not just be embarrassing but humiliating for the Minnesota Wild, the team from the so-called State Of Hockey.

Not only that, but frankly the Preds have outplayed the Pittsburgh Penguins all three games of the Stanley Cup Finals so far.  And even though the Pens won the first two games, it feels as though the jig is up with them; Nashville (at least according to them) is faster and healthier, and they finally broke through by clubbing Pittsburgh 5-1 in Game 3 yesterday.  This might be the turning point, which means Nashville might, just might, win the Stanley Cup.  Think about that: A team from fucking Nashville, a franchise that was so sparsely followed attendance figures were followed to see if they were allowed to move, a city in a state whose high school sports association does not sponsor hockey ... that organization may get the Stanley Cup before the Minnesota Wild.  We should be ashamed of ourselves if that happens.

(Aside: I have heard some talk about Nashville now being a "hockey town."  Bullshit.  First of all, I pointed out the extreme lack of grassroots participation in hockey in the city and state.  You guys may have a great hockey organization.  You fucking people will never be a hockey town.  And by the way, those Predators snuck in as the last playoff team in the Western Conference.  By all rights they should lose the Stanley Cup, but even if they somehow did win it, I don't think this team is built like a dynasty.  There's a greater possibility that they'll miss next year's playoffs.  Will "Smashville" be a "hockey town" then?  Slow y'all roll.)

The other reason I wanted to write about the Mild was that I came across this piece from the (St. Paul) Pioneer Press's Chad Graff on how the Preds made it to the finals.  Uh, luck?  No, trades, at least according to him.  (I'm not saying Graff or the team is wrong, I'm just bitter.)  But I came across this nugget I never knew about Owner Craig Leipold's philosophy of building up the Wild:

On the one hand, the Wild have failed to pull off the big-name trades that vaulted the Predators to the finals, surely frustrating for a passionate fan base. On the other hand, the Predators have proven that NHL teams can reach the pinnacle of the sport without a lengthy rebuild that nets several high draft picks, something Wild owner Craig Leipold said he’s not interested in.

“It’s not a model I’m willing to take,” Leipold said last month. “That’s not a model that I think our fans want.”

That leaves Fletcher with the unenviable task of getting the Wild over the hump of first- and second-round playoff appearances without the benefit of high draft picks. Minnesota has been to the playoffs for five straight seasons but has won only two second-round games.

You mean, we will never rebuild?  Never??  No #1 draft picks because we don't want that?  No Sidney Crosby?  No Jonathan Toews?  No Connor McDavid?  No Auston Matthews?  We don't want any of those guys because we're The State Of Hockey?  We -- well, no ... you -- must perpetually trot out a good team onto the ice even though we face a chance that we'll just fucking stall in the playoffs, like we are doing right now?  And the philosophy is to stay the goddamn course?!

OK, maybe I shouldn't quote Ricky Bobby, but goddammit, if you're not first, you're last.  And I don't know about the other Mild yokels that follow this team, but like I always say, any season that one of my teams doesn't win a championship is a season of failure.  Your team, Mr. Leipold, has failed for the past two decades, and it has failed ever since you bought the team.  If this is the thinking, and if what we saw this year with this fucking club is the result you prefer ... blow up this team or fuck this team.  Seriously.

So We Changed Wi-Fi Service Yesterday ...

It seems a happy coincidence that the last day of my 60-month promotional period for my bundled Internet and phone with CenturyLink, yesterday/Friday (which thus was the day I asked CL to end my 3-meg service with them), was the day Comcast said some guy could in the morning and attach a cable to our home so we could get their 55-meg wi-fi.  Didn't miss a beat, I don't think.

And so far, so good.  Father was the one who was home while I was at work and Mother was at the dentist.  I checked in a couple times during breaks and lunch.  The guy didn't come till 10, even though the appointment was planned for 9-11.  Father said that he stayed for four hours.  But he tried it and it was fine.  Better than fine, actually -- fast, reliable and no interruptions, at least not yet.  I have asked Mother if she feels the same and she does.  She was watching videos when I left for work today and when I came back, and she is totally happy.  Mother was the one who was complaining about our slow wi-fi most of all, and I have to admit that I was spurred to finally change service because of her bitching.

I have had wavering results with cable Internet.  I connected through my phone last night, but now I can't.  I tried connected through my tablet, and I can, but the pictures aren't coming in.  And as of right now, I can connect with it through my computer, and so far, no problems, and I assume I'll be able to publish this blog post without incident.  I don't know if my connection problems with my smartphone and my tablet.  It could be because both contraptions (and my computer, really) are really old.  My tablet is from HewlettPackard, and its operating system was discontinued a few years ago.  I tried adding my e-mail and Facebook accounts and I couldn't.  So it may not be Comcast; it might be my devices.

Meanwhile I was told that, besides being late, the Comcast installer was great; most of those four hours, he said, they were just talking.  So that was a positive interaction.  But there could be negative ones.  After all, Comcast is no longer trying to court my business.  They have it now, so they can treat me as crappily as they want.  And I haven't received my bill yet -- surprise, surprise!!!