So How The Fuck Am I Gonna Look Her In The Eye Tomorrow?

Last night I had plans to leave work early.  I had to.  I have been told by my boss that I cannot have overtime, and I have left early Monday through Wednesday.  And I had a phone call with my shrink scheduled after work, and I wanted to eat while talking to him, so I thought it was the perfect time for me to leave super early.  If I left so early that I was below time, I could make up for that by staying a bit later on Friday.

Oh, but shit got ruined real quick.  First, the department ended the afternoon with a favor by my other boss to try and finish up work before we went, and since I'm there the latest, the rest of this work fell to me.  Then, while I was trying to finish up (knowing by then that I probably couldn't leave as early as I planned), my boss calls me into his office.  Oh, shit, I thought.  And I was right.

I wasn't being fired.  I wasn't being reamed, either, although at times it felt like I was.  I was being told what to expect while I'm being "re-trained," which has happened lately.  I was reminded that they have my best interests at heart and want just for me to be the best worker I can be ... which is why they tell me that I can do something better.  They reminded me that I am working in a department where everybody there has been there for years, so they know how to do things best.  And if I had not been trained on something before, he advised me not to say, "Oh, I don't remember being trained on this," even though that's 100 fucking per cent true.  (Plus, he said something about my satellite radio and how it takes for me to set it up.  But with his permission I am going to just listen online and stop with the bullshit.)

So this had to have come out of two incidents -- both from a supervisor, the one I once thought highly of.  The first one was my extreme annoyance being told I had to find these forms a different way, which I detailed here.  The second incident happened Tuesday, and I still think it was sort-of innocent ... though apparently not.

I was out in My Main Department and the supervisor came up to me about this ... process.  Again, I'm going to be vague about it so as 1) not to blow my cover (although I wonder if someone from work already knows about this and 2) I don't want to bore you with the details.  So, I'm in filing, and sometimes we get faxed requests to get a certain form we need to find in filing.  When we find it, we have to go into this program whereby we electronically note that we are sending this form along to a department (not necessarily the one that requested it, just the one that needs to take a look at it) before we physically go into that department and drop that form off there.  Still with me?

In this screen in this program where we electronically note this form is being sent along, we have to fill out a few lines.  One of them is a reason line.  On the request form there is a reason a form is being requested.  However, when I was trained, I was specifically -- specifically -- told that it was OK to put in a generic reason everything single time ... and what the fuck, I might as well say it: ACTION.  I was told that that was OK, and I think -- I think -- the reason was that I needed to get these sent out quickly if I had many of these requests getting faxed in at once.

Because I am a stickler, I have actually looked at the request form, looked at the reason, and typed that reason on the screen.  But only sometimes, because hey, sometimes I feel courteous and sometimes I ... don't.  Besides, I WASN'T TRAINED TO DO THAT!!!  So I told her this (I didn't shout it), and I thought it went well.

The meeting with my boss indicates to me, clearly, that it didn't.  My boss called me into this 20-Minute meeting because either she asked him to do it or she told him about what I said and he thought it was enough to put down any fires that might be smoldering by calling me in.  Either way, she told him about what I said and did.  So that brings up a whole other rat's nest of shit I need to process.  Because on the one hand, I totally think she blew the "I wasn't trained on this" comment way out of proportion.  All I was doing was telling the truth and defending myself.  For those reasons, this meeting was an overreaction.  On the other hand, unfortunately, it is clear that my frustration over being told that I should do things a different got the better of me and did not go unnoticed.  That is something I don't like in me, and even though this specific way I should do things is something I don't particularly like, I'm not going to fight it.

I had to end the meeting with my boss.  I told him my frustrations with re-training and that I will try and do better (wanking motion).  But my takeaway is that this supervisor has a problem with me.  Not saying that it's not justified, but she has a problem with me.  On top of that, today I'm working under her in her department.  And worse than that, my boss told me that I had to tell her, first thing in the morning, that I have to leave a half-hour early to make sure I don't accrue overtime.  (Really doesn't matter because she leaves three hours before I do.)  I really don't want to speak with her because shit is now awkward.  But my boss told me I had to.

So, in the morning, when I go into the department and look her in the freakin' eye, what am I going to say?  How will I act as I say what I am going to say?  And how will she take what I say and how I say it?  I think I have to play this off as ain't no thing.  But maybe I'll stick to my principles and go, "So you have a fuckin' problem with me?!?!?!"  And then I'd be fired ... which might be the path I'm walking down now.

I'll sleep on it.  Maybe I'll calm down by tomorrow.  Or, maybe I won't.

In the meantime I should brush up on my resume.

Chris?

The Anti-Maskers!!!!

I was afraid this anti-masker bullshit was going to affect me personally.  Hearing it from douches waiting in line at Wal-Mart was, unfortunately, not going to be the only time.

I see it at work, but I want to start with Jersey Mike's on Monday.  Went there before work (was filling in at filing second shift) to grab something to eat during the day.  Jersey Mike's was open inside (I wanted to order online Sunday night but for some reason I could not order for Monday although I could for Tuesday and Wednesday, as if that Jersey Mike's was a museum and thus closed on Mondays).  There was a line but we were spaced apart, though I don't know if it was six feet.  The tables and chairs were stacked up against the wall to make certain that no one can eat inside.  It was busier than I liked, but I was ordering just fine and I was going to make it to work on time.

In that waystation after I ordered, while I was waiting to get my toppings and before paying for it, I heard the woman behind me order.  The person behind the counter then asked, "Do you have a mask?"  And I turned around.  The woman, who was holding who I assume was her daughter, did not have a mask, even though everyone around her did.  She said she didn't because, get this, she has a "medicle exemptshun."  Oh, shit.

The worker was standing her ground.  Apparently, if you don't wear a mask but don't have to due to medical exemptions, you can order, but you have to do so online.  That is what the worker wanted the woman to do.  "But I'm here, and I want to order now," she replied.  After a quick and escalating back-and-forth, the worker had enough and took the order of the person behind her.

And then that bitch went fucking nuts.  "Is this white supremacy or something?" is what she said, and I'm not fucking shitting you.  And she doubled down by saying, "Is this putting your knee on my neck?" and I was moving up to the cash register, and the cashier, who looks Black, just looked at her direction and went, "Nah, that's just ... no ... come on."

The worker had enough.  "Look, if you don't have a mask, and don't want to order outside, I'm going to call the police," and she walked over to the phone to make the call.  To which this crazy bitch replied, "OK, I'm going to call the police" -- and she did ... after she walked out.  And a little bit afterward I got my sandwich and chips and pop and I walked outside.  Leaving the parking lot I saw this Karen, clutching her baby with one arm and on the phone with her free hand ... and I also saw a police car coming into the parking lot.  I think I got out of there at just the right time.

---

I'm also seeing some resistance, although subtle, to masks at work.  We have had a mask mandate there for some time.  But I have noticed that a few people I work with in the departments I work with show their disdain for wearing them, and in particular the reason why they don't.  What I mean is, I have seen a few of them wear the mask underneath the nose.  That's because no one wants to smell their own breath.  I understand that, but obviously you are defeating the purpose of wearing a mask (and we get surgical ones) if you don't wear it properly.  Didn't matter to them; I saw one purposely pull hers down under her nose.  Hey, you get used to smelling your own breath.  I don't brush my teeth in the morning, and I don't mind my breath!

The higher-ups at work have had enough.  Yesterday we had an impromptu meeting where we were warned, in no uncertain terms, to pull the masks up to cover the nose as well as the mouth.  We'll see if the anti-maskers comply.  I am kind of shocked to see so many of my co-workers be such petty rebels like this, including a few that I didn't think would be so obstinate against it.  One of them is not that woman who pulled her mask down to free her nose.  I just get a Republican, let-'er-rip vibe from her.  She might quit.  And I might want her to quit.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

Oh look, the three teams that normally play in the Twin Cities summer are playing again!  Just like old times!!  And next week we'll include the Wild!!!  A fourth team, and a non-summer one, in a summer survey?  Just not like old times!!!!

#0: United FC (Last Week: -1).  Toss some love to the Loons; even though they coughed up a lead and finished pool play in the MLS Is Back Tournament with a 2-all Draw against Colorado last Wednesday, they remain, through five Matches that count toward the regular season, unbeaten.  Moreover, they survived another lead-up-coughing last/Tuesday night and upset arguably the most in-form side in this tournament, Columbus, 5-3 in Penalty Kicks (which, let's be honest, is the worst on-field way to find a winner in sports) to advance to the Quarterfinals.  They have exhibited a lot of grit in Orlando; the backline, including plugged-in Centerback Jose Aja (filling in while reigning Defender Of The Year Ike Opara takes this tournament off for health precautions), has been stout; the Defensive Midfield pairing of Ozzie Alonso and Jan Gregus has been a formidable first line of defense; the right-side stack of Romain Metanire and Ethan Finlay has been a productive (albeit one-sided) vector of offense; and Robin Lod was finally able to break through with the first Goal of the Eighthfinal Game against the Crew.  We have to watch the health of Metanire and Alonso.  But I feel good about their QF tilt versus the San Jose Earthquakes Saturday night.  Remember that in the last Game before the league (and the world) shut down, MNUFC thrashed the Quakes in San Jose, 5-2.  It feels as though they have the Earthquakes' number; I hope I haven't just jinxed them.

#-1: Twins (Re-Entry!).  In some ways I feel sorry for Major League Baseball.  While it's because they have made a series of missteps over the decades, the zeitgeist that somehow the league is going to blow it again was a bit, well, overblown.  The pandemic just fell while baseball was about to start.  People were thinking that The National Pastime would be the sport -- not basketball or hockey, two leagues that were about to enter postseason play -- that would bring the nation back to normalcy.  Those are lofty existential hopes that MLB simply could not live up to.  Now, the bickering between ownership and the players did not help.  But what happened was a plan that was decided very early on in negotiations shortly after the league shut down: A 60-Game season, played mostly intra-division, in front of no fans.  The bubble concept was shot down, and with over a dozen members of the Miami Marlins organization testing positive for coronavirus, maybe this plan of playing in home parks will turn out to be a bad idea.  What I'm saying is that it felt inevitable that there would be some baseball played this summer, and here we are.

The Minnesota Twins come into this season squarely as one of the best teams in the majors and a championship contender.  And the lineup has not disappointed yet, guiding this club to a 3-1 opening week record, including a series win at the White Sox and capped with a 6-3 doubling-up of St. Louis last/Tuesday night in the home opener of what would have been a glorious day to watch a ballgame at Target Field.  Starting Pitching, of course, will be the question mark that decides how this year will wind up for the Twins, but small sample size aside, it feels good to be able to just assume that a part of a side you're rooting for is going to be awesome.

Assuming the virus does not fuck up the team's plans, they'll finish up their eight-Game homestand with a second and final matchup against the Cardinals, four over the weekend vs. Cleveland, and a pair of a back-to-back, home-and-home, two-and-two series against Pittsburgh.

#-2: Lynx (Re-Entry!).  In case you missed it, the dynasty of the Lynx is over.  I was taken aback when I learned a couple Months ago that the OG Lynx, Seimone Augustus, did not reach an agreement with the squad and signed as a free agent with Los Angeles.  That means that the four players that won the franchise's first three titles (in '11, '13 and '15) are now all gone.  (Oh, did you know that Rebekkah Brunson retired before the season started and is now assisting Reeve and serving as an analyst for Lynx Timberwolves broadcasts?)

So the team is basically starting over.  Well, they have Sylvia Fowles, so the cupboard isn't completely bare.  But Cheryl Reeve now is in rebuilding mode -- WNBA writers for The Athletic think only New York will be worse this season -- and she's putting rookies and second-year players around Big Syl to see what she's got.  So far this mini-season (the WNBA is in a bubble, or "Wubble," in Florida, like Major League Soccer) they've split their first two Games.  They made a herculean comeback in the Fourth Quarter to defeat Connecticut by eight in the season opener Sunday afternoon (they outscored the Sun in the final stanza 27-12), but then got clobbered by 24 last/Tuesday evening to arguably the favorite to win the title this season, Seattle.  At least Fowles became the all-time rebounder in WNBA history in the loss, moving herself past ... Rebekkah Brunson, oddly enough.

They "host" (naming hosts and visitors may be unnecessary in a neutral court, but I think it's for sorting out who wears which colors) Chicago tomorrow/Thursday and "visit" Connecticut (Minnesota was the home team in their first matchup) Saturday.

Am I Strong Enough? Do I Care Enough?

So this thing with the alumni club is continuing.  I don't know how effective we're being, but there are some signs that we are not losing, at least.  For one thing, we have been meeting every Sunday for the past several, and although we have lost people, there are still some people Zooming.  For another, there is a sign that we have momentum, which is something I'm scared would abate after we got the first few things we wanted to do off the ground.  The big thing happened last week: Finally, one of our contacts with the media has come through with a story about the dissolution, and concurrently though maybe not causally, they have tried to reach out to some of us ... first as part of a cover divide-and-conquer strategy, but now with an invitation to Zoom about our grievances.

With that, we are getting into the nuts and bolts of this issue -- which means involvement, and commitment.  And I have suddenly developed stage fright.  From this meeting are calls for volunteers to develop talking points, and volunteers to deliver those points if and when a meeting is made.  I wanted to pitch in -- show solidarity at the initial outrage, be part of the numbers as we started sending out petitions and letters, even giving opinions on tactics and mindsets.  But this is a whole nother level of sticking your neck out.  And I have heard (maybe not substantiated, but heard) that these guys have intimidated some people on our side to silence.

I don't want to be intimated, but ... I'm intimidated.  Not just by them, but the enormity of the whole issue.  And frankly, I don't know how invested and/or passionate I am about being on our side.  I mean, it's important.  But can I actually do some presentation and speak with authority when a part of me inside says, "Eh, I don't care if this goes one way or the other."?  I don't know . ...

That Trifling Whore Texted Me Again

I thought I blocked her, but apparently I didn't, since she was able to text me, so I regret not doing it.

I apparently pop into her mind the same way strippers who are not lazy, and who actually know what the fuck they're doing, pop into mine.  She's desperate for money, but there's no goddamn way I'm giving her a red cent anymore.  My God, how pathetic.

But what the hell do I do to get rid of her?  Well, I guess I could be cold and ghost her, and block her number.  But we have mutual friends (mutual friends being the above strippers who are not lazy and actually know what the fuck they're doing) and if I do go to a house party there's a chance I'll see her.  Shit, man, I don't know how to be free of her.

His Day Begins When Mine Ends

Father's up now.  I'm typing this at 3:30 and he's up.  I don't know if it's because he can't sleep or he's actually starting his day.  I don't know if he knows.  But he has done this with some frequency the past few weeks, which is a tad more frequently than he typically does it.  So no, this is not unusual (although I don't remember him being up at 3:30 often ... 4, yes, by 3:30?  That's still late night, yo), but it irks the hell out of me nonetheless.

I'm sure that when My Father's up this early he can hear me or my TV or the typing on my computer, like I'm doing right now.  We don't talk this late/early.  Back in the day when he'd pull this, I think there were several cases where he would start bitching at me and I'd be all, "Oh, shut up, you old man!"  We certainly couldn't start yelling at each other, of course, because we'd wake up Mother and maybe the neighbors.  And so we just go wordlessly on our routine, him activating his body, me turning my body down for the night.

I can justify being active-sounding now because I'm filling in for someone at work -- second shift in filing.  I don't have to be there until 1:30.  So shoot, I don't have to wake up until ... well, I took Mother up on her offer of lunch, so noon would be when I would have to wake up.  I turn in now and go all unconscious, and I'd get a full night's sleep.  So what's the problem, Father?

It's Fuckin' Hot Out There

Let it be said that if it were not for the coronavirus and the global protest over the murder of George Floyd, the thing the nation would be talking about now is the sustained heat wave most of the United States have been suffering through all summer.  There would be expansive talk about climate change and how the hot temperatures are indicative of something worldwide and calamitous.  But we're not.  And people have been complaining for years that we should be talking about climate change more than we have been.  And we should ... except that we have two more comprehensive issues the world, in my opinion, needs to worry about now more.

There was a Heat Warning Friday and yesterday, and there was one today.  But storms that rolled in overnight and lasted through the morning tamped down temps to the point where today's Heat Warning was cancelled this morning.

Went out to watch Last Sunday at the EPL and the NWSL Challenge Cup Final at Brit's, then to South Minneapolis for a State Fair food called the Rainbow Cloud Roll, then a Target run.  Thought about wearing shorts, but the Heat Warning cancellation plus the cloudy weather as I was leaving plus the alternative being shorts whose pockets seem so short that I'm afraid something will fall out of them while I'm about and about convinced me I should wear the jeans I've been wearing all week.

But now it's sunny and hot as fuck, and although it's been partly cloudy since the morning, the rain that was supposed to come in in the afternoon has not materialized.  Meanwhile I'm sweating through my thighs, as usual, making the ink in all the receipts I have in my pocket run and bleed.  I hate this damn feeling.

There should be a Heat Warning right now.  It feels that hot.  But then again, it's felt "that hot" all summer.

Fucking Chinese Swill Shit

Grew up drinking weird shit like this fucking concoction of ... well, Mother made all of us this thing of ... uh, I don't know what the fuck it is.  All I know is it's sugary as shit and that she'll throw me out of the house if I don't drink it.  And once she tells me to drink a whole goddamn bowl of it, that means she probably made enough to make me drink this goddamn thing every day for a week.

It's outside on the kitchen counter now.

I'm thirsty, but I sure as shit don't want that.  And to think my only other liquid options are water and milk.

Fuck this.

I Am Ashamed, And I Want Revenge (Oh, And There's A Story Surrounding This, Too)

Last night my sister and I had a talk.  It was about her best friend, someone whom she's known since they were 5.  They have differing viewpoints on a lot of political things, the latest being George Floyd.  Texts were exchanged between them, and between her friend and my brother-in-law (my sister's husband).  She asked me what I thought; I finally got around to talking to her last night.

I had a nit to pick with all three, but I generally thought all three had their hearts in the right place.  I thought that was that.  But my sister was not accepting that.  The differing thoughts between her and her best friend are really bothering her.  I understand that friends, even family, have been torn apart by politics and issues -- and feeling how I feel about the current state of the world, I accept that it needs to happen sometimes.  But I hoped that my sister and her friend would not throw away a 35-year relationship because of it.

So I asked why it was still bugging her, why she wouldn't let the issues behind her friend's texts to her rest until, frankly, the next racial incident that sets the country aflame.  My sister really felt as though she needs to bring up this issue with her.  Why?

Well, my sister isn't completely convinced she ever respected how our lives are in America.  We have been the victims of racism, and she believes that her best friend has white privilege over not completely understanding how hard it has been for this family sometimes.

And then ... you know, I need to be vague about what she said next.  Sorry.  What she said next is something only she can say -- it's not my story.  But she said she told me about it before, and (at this point I'm making this all about me, I confess) I have no idea it happened.  I am absolutely ashamed of myself for not remembering.  Concurrently, and I don't feel this way just because I forgot, I want revenge at the cunt who did this.  Because no one fucks with this family.

Oh, going back to my sister ... I think I now understand why she is affected by what her friend thinks.  I told my sister this goes to the core of who she is.  So she should bring it up, at a time when it's convenient for her and not for her friend.  And if she doesn't like what her friend says, then they're done.  Simple as that.

But going back to me ... I told her I still want that bitch's name.  And I also told her I am totally fucking hating myself for forgetting.

#MedBikini? I'll Wank To That!

So late last night on Twitter the #MedBikini started to blow up.  I think it has to do with a link to a paper about non-professionalism in female doctors in social media or something.  I can't find the study, so I'm not sure if it's even real.

But as a result, a backlash has started on social media, of course.  Many health professionals (most but not all female) have decided to show that nasty nogoodnik and his staid paper what for by posting hot pictures of themselves in bikinis and shit.  And I have half a mind to get back at them by jerking off to them.

Why?  Because it is unprofessional.  It's also nobody's business.  You can dress however the fuck you want after hours.  But keep that shit away from your patients.  Well, unless you're kinky and ready for the possibility that one of the males you see at your practice will get horny from seeing you scantily clad in a picture you posted on Instagram or Twitter and start beating off in front of you.  Yeah, when you put up something on the Internet, don't be surprised that someone you know might see it ... and act upon his perverted urges on it.

Yeah, I said what I said.  Cancel me.

Working With The Enemy

So there is an alumni club function that's happening in two Weeks that I don't want to do.  It's our annual party, but because of the pandemic it has gone virtual, which sucks because parties can't be on Zoom.  Moreover, it's going to be on a weekday, and I don't want to do this on a weekday.

The other reasons I hesitate doing this have to do with the new structure with the alumni association.  Somehow, the new organizational chart simultaneously vests more control to Los Angeles while at the same time asking volunteers to do gig work.  I talked about how this plan is a shitshow, and it has not stopped; there is still a lot of people who think this is a stupid idea and want to restore middle management-type control.

In the meantime, this online "party" is being conducted by the alumni association, and they have rules.  They were the ones who decided this was going to happen during a weekday afternoon.  Also, everyone who has planned on "going" to the "party" will be giving a speech that points out how our alma mater has helped us with our career choice.  I hate being told what to say, and moreover, given my gig job now, I don't think I can credibly tell incoming students that my degree has helped me in my job of administrative work without my nose growing several inches for each lie.

Unfortunately, I think I might need to lie to play the long game.  I am former middle management who still wants an alumni presence in the Twin Cities and thinks there won't be anyone who will step up and do what needs to be done to further my university's brand up here.  In order to continue to do that, I think I need to continue to curry favor with the alumni association.  That means doing this, even though it's a crap-ass idea and it sounds like no fun.  If I don't do it, I have no reason to believe that if things get back to normal next year and I plan on organizing an actual party where new freshmen can get together and hang, someone from L.A. will swoop in and go, "Who the hell are you to think you can plan this?"  I could be paranoid, but no-showing for this thing opens me up to accusations that I don't want to help my alma mater, and the newly-empowered alumni association could empower some other schmuck to do the things I still want to do.

So, if I do do this (and I'm still debating), I need to knuckle under and do this Zoom "party" according to the wishes of the alumni association.  I am in contact with one of its representatives, and after e-mailing back and forth, we are doing a Zoom to orient me on what I need to do for this "event" this evening.  I am talking to her even though I am part of this "rebellion," whereby I am still actively in solidarity with those who also have essentially been fired from our positions.  I worry that we are losing momentum, but we are in regular contact with each other, and we are still trying to get the word out about our predicament, including talking about this dumpster fire in the media and trying to send regular correspondence to officials at the university who have the capacity to fire people like the alumni relations liaison I will be speaking with tonight.  I wonder if she knows this.  If so, we are going to be cordial in a situation where we actually are anything but.  This will be awkward.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: United FC (Last Week: 0).  Well, the Loons dropped their first Points of the ... "regular season" with Friday night's snoozer of a goalless Draw against Real Salt Lake.  There's really not much else to say about this Match -- which brings up the inherent difficulty of talking about a soccer Game with no Goals.  Suffice it to say, this means that MNUFC have yet to score in regulation time during MLS Is Back.  However, I think that because D. C. United lost to Montreal late last/Tuesday night, the United FC is is officially in the Knockout Round; tonight's/late Wednesday night's contest against Colorado will now only be for seeding.  The KO Round begins with the eighth-finals this weekend through Tuesday, depending on where in the team's Group D they eventually wind up.  I will have a bit more extensive analysis, either good or bad, for next week's WMNSS.  Right now, it seems just a tad premature to do that.

I Sense A Pattern Here ...

Just a couple hours ago I unwound my night (of sleeping; I fell asleep around 7 and woke up around 9:30, totally missing the Major League Soccer Match I was trying to listen to on Sirius XM through my phone) with a 1-2 combination of verbal abuse by bullying white (OK ... White) male leaders of companies.  First was Peter Lenkov, showrunner for the reboots of Hawaii Five-O, MacGuyver and Magnum P.I.  After reading this Vanity Fair investigation, I totally regret ever watching a single minute of Hawaii Five-O.  Then, there's this story of the CEO of Hanna Andersson, a kids' clothing company I have never heard of -- and after reading it, I'm glad I hadn't.

Fantastic journalism, both articles.  But seeing these two stories makes me wish I could live without working at all.  Also, it makes me think White men need to stop being in charge of things.  God, what assholes.

More Calls?!

So although I continue to chafe amongst all the new tasks I have to follow, in order, in The Third Department, I felt as though today went well.  No one asking me questions (although I had to bug my co-worker with, like, almost a dozen throughout the day) and no one pestering me.  The calls kind of sucked, and my co-worker had to step in to tell me to look at the computer screen while I was making a call (wanking motion), but OK.

But just as I was about to leave, I was told that I needed to make more calls.  More calls?!  I thought I needed to do them for one particular day, but I guess that was a big fat lie; I needed to do them for two.  Whatever -- I did as much as I could before I have to leave.  But my God, why in the hell did no one tell me I needed to make more calls than I should have done!  I know the rules ... until I found out I didn't.  Yeesh.

Oh -- The Things I Could Be Doing:

• There is a letter I should send to university leaders in regards to alumni clubs;
• Some parts of that letter I should e-mail my membership about, including one of the members (my friend) coming down with COVID-19;
• I haven't replied to the e-mail to my co-worker in some time.

That's just three things, but it's a lot.  Especially the first thing, the letter to university bigwigs.  I want to do it right, and I'm still debating whether to send it via e-mail or snail mail -- and I might send it certified.  But in thinking about it, I'm not doing anything, and I don't have the rest of my life to do them.

With that being said, I think I'm going to try and take a nap.

First Time In A Long Time

I stayed up last night.  There were a lot of things I could have done, and I think I will write a blog post about them after I get home from fucking ****e.  But out of the blue I decided I wanted to update an Excel spreadsheet that I initially began to generate that listed all top-flight college football teams and, maybe odd to you, but the time and day of the week of the Head Coach's radio show and the precise colors of that university.  (I debated a bit what format; I wanted to use RGB, but Boston College for some fucking reason doesn't have its colors in that, so I finally settled on Pantone.)  I did six -- my alma mater and then the first school listed alphabetically for each of the five BcS schools.

Anyway, the date last updated for this spreadsheet?  Some time in 2011.  Yeah, I was total gangbusters going into it because I was initially obsessed with getting radio coaches show dates, and then I ... stopped.  Until last night.  But I probably will not touch it again for another nine years!

Dodging Bullets

As I thought, my brother and niece were not there "for a bit," like Mother said they would be.  (Aside: As I did not think, my sister-in-law didn't come over.  Hmmm. ...)  They got there almost precisely at noon (I don't know because they came through the door while I was in the backyard cleaning up the lawnmower after I just got done cutting grass) and my niece was playing with blocks (after playing with the ice shaver before that and enjoying Mother blowing bubbles in her face in the back deck before that) when I left at 2.

I left at 2 for the thing I indicated to my parents I had to do, even though I never told her what that thing was: A taste test ten Minutes away.  I got there in plenty of time.  In fact, the main proctor cycled us through the test(s) and I was out of there at 3:15, 45 Minutes after we started, when we were told that the session would take 75.  Could have gotten Pizza Hut and been home around 3:30, but instead I went to my storage unit five Minutes north of the session to read an old issue of ESPN The Magazine until it was time to get the pizzas at 4:30, the time I said I would get the pizzas when I placed my order online.  (Actually I got there at 4:15, after I stepped into a gas station to grab a Pepsi.)

But back to the taste test.  It was held at a meeting room in a church.  I've never been to this place before, so I postulate that the company administering the taste test needed to find a space big enough for the sample size they need (I say there were 20-30 people) to be able to spread out when sitting down to take their samples.  From the description of the test, the company was going to comply as stringently as possible to standards to protect against COVID-19 while trying to get this done.  For the first time in my life I got my temperature taken with a forehead scan.  (I think I got a 97.9.)  I got a spot in the back of the room, six feet away from the closest desk (sat on by an anti-masker -- I should talk about these people, for they piss me off).  Tablets are used to compile our answers registering our thoughts on these samples, but this time they were put in plastic pouches.  Usually workers give us samples, but this time we were supposed to get up, walk on pathways marked by tape on the floor to table, pick up the samples from there, then walk back to our desks.

Well, there's one exception to that.  Most people had a walkway where they had to follow to get back to their desk, but since I was in the very back, I was allowed to just walk directly back to my desk.  I followed the pathway four of the times I was up, but for the first and last samples I picked up, I decided I wanted to be a non-compliant rebel and scooted back to my desk against the flow of participants and the airflow they generated.

Yeah, about that.  I kind of regret that.  I was told that what I did was OK, but I did see that I was going against the flow of "traffic," and as such I was crossing paths with strangers who had to, at least theoretically, breathe in the air I expelled.  (Oh, we all had to wear masks when we were getting these samples, but could take them off once we sat down.)  Also, I noticed that although we were sitting down more than six feet apart, this was indoors, and I didn't hear any loud fans circulating the air around.  So, when it comes to assessing risk for getting the coronavirus, the setting this afternoon is a lot better than being crowded next to each other, as we usually would be in non-pandemic times.  Could we be farther apart?  I guess.  Would this be better if it were done outside?  Never seen it before (besides this one time where I got paid to try out lawnmowers), but yes, it would.  Should I have not done this?  Well, let's see how I feel between now and two weeks from now.

But shoot, I have been in several situations where I suddenly realize I might, maybe should be scared that I might contract the virus.  A few months ago I was stacked up at the Wells Fargo drive-thru and this car full of dirty people were the only people around me not wearing masks.  I went to a bar a couple weeks ago to watch an NWSL match and stayed there for more than two Hours.  And then there's work five days a week.  Now, I haven't gotten the virus, at least I don't think, and yes, I use my prior experience to re-assess my risk in thinking about doing anything.  I'd like to think I'm not being complacent.  But time moves on, and at some point I will find myself walking into a situation not even thinking about catching the 'Rona when I would adamantly stay away before.  And the conditions of that situation will be far from 0%, and therefore, if I don't get the virus, I should, beyond anything else, thank my lucky stars that I keep dodging bullets.

And yes, tomorrow I will dodge a bullet in a situation where I am happily walking into: Going to ****e's house and fucking her.  Close contact?  Yes.  Close contact for 15 Minutes, the standard of time in defining "close contact?"  Well, I wish, but that has never happened.  And we don't cuddle.

And Today Is ... Going To Be Complicated

After the fucking shitty day at work, putting a crap coda on a fairly miserable week at work, I was looking forward to this weekend more than any other before.  (I might have said that last week, too.  But I also mean it this week.)  But plans seem to have been ruined for many, many reasons.

I have known for a while that I need to mow the lawn here.  The weekend was going to be perfect.  But from about a week ago, weather forecasts predicted Saturday would see a huge spike in temperature -- above 90 -- and as the week wore on, meteorologists saw that it was going to be a damn humid one, too.

Still, I was going to mow the lawn -- early in the morning.  That will give me the whole afternoon to, probably against good sense, go out to Maplewood Mall to eat a Flowering Onion (one of the vendors of the Minnesota State Fair that now needs to make money this summer whenever and wherever they can).  On top of that, Thursday night I signed up for a taste test which is very close to me: Ten Minutes away, on the way to the storage unit.  I could mow, go out to Maplewood Mall, drive to the taste test, then come home.

What I learned at dinner changed all that.  First, my parents decided they wanted to eat Pizza Hut.  That meant I had to buy Coke, which means I would have a couple places I would have to go after the taste test.  But then Mother told me my brother, sister-in-law and niece are coming over for the first time in months.  I'm not sure if that's completely safe with the virus going around.  Moreover, when Mother told me, she didn't know when they would be over, just that the visit was going to be short.  Short is good (don't get me wrong -- I love seeing my niece, I just have plans today) but when she would be coming over will dictate whether I can mow the lawn when I want and if I can go to Maplewood Mall and, most importantly, whether I would need to cancel the taste test ... and forego the $30 that goes along with it.

My brother WhatsApped that they would be there around noon.  It drops in at pretty much a crappy time today.  I should be well past finished with the lawn, but I should be on my way to Maplewood Mall around noon, so to be cautious, that Flowering Onion is out for this weekend.  (Luckily they'll be there a couple more weekends.)  The thing that remains up in the air is how long they are going to stay.  I don't have complete confidence that the visit will be "short."  If it goes long enough (say, 2 1/2 Hours), I'll have to go online and cancel.

Too many things up in the air.  Oh, and it's supposed to be hot as fuck.  And double oh -- a storm has started right now, as I am typing this blog post.  The storm is supposed to contain a significant wind event overnight.  I think I might have to stay up to "hear" whether this storm is going to be really bad for the neighborhood.  But staying up means not mowing the lawn in the morning; instead, I either mow in the middle of the heat or, possibly, not even being able to mow if it's late enough where they come over and I'll have to say hi to them.

Ick -- too much to think about, goddammit.

Well, I hope I still have Sunday.  I will be buying salted nut rolls for Mother -- but after I drive down to ****e's place and fuck the shit out of her.

And Work Was Shit Today

So first, I was in filing and I asked too many questions to my liking.

And then I was looking for a form and I had to ask not just my supervisor but my co-worker for their help.  And I got so confused because I totally made a mistake -- I keyed in something wrong because I fat-fingered the wrong digit in the 10-key -- but because of this I just absolutely lost my mind.  And I hated being in that uncomfortable position because I don't want to ask for help, and it's doubly maddening that this was a situation I created.

And then I had to do this test in the lab and the person testing me was all, "So, at this point, what do you do?" and I give an answer and she goes "WRONGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" and I fucking pass anyway, even though I don't feel like I should have.

And then I go to The Third Department where I had all these things I needed to do but only one hour to do them, and then I got so slow that I got backed up, and my supervisor wouldn't let me stay and finish all those things, so I ... well, I fucking left work for other people to do and I proved I couldn't hold my own.  I used to love this job and now I hate it and dread it so goddamn much.

And then I tried to take a nap for lunch but couldn't because I was so goddamn frazzled by all the shit that happened in the morning I was too tired to sleep.

I can't fucking believe that in the afternoon I was virtually fantasizing about keying forms so I could escape from filing and the lab and The Third Department.

Goddamn, I hate this job.  I really feel like I could do so much better in literally any other job.

Retraining Chafing

My evaluation in filing led my supervisor to have me retrain at this specific position.  Thought it would end today, but apparently I need to do it tomorrow.

I could not hide my annoyance with being retrained.  She told me I was working too slow.  I thought I was being thorough, and I didn't want to double back.  (I'm sorry I'm being skimpy with the details; I don't want people at work to know I'm talking about this.)  I should have not let my temper and stubbornness get the better of me when she diplomatically offered a compromise: If I get faster with the work, maybe I can go back doing some of the things I had been doing.  That's the trait of a leader, and I should have expressed better how ... OK I am with that.

But I didn't.  Not like I was sassing her or anything; we moved over to The Third Department, where I really did need to be trained in how to do these new tasks the right way, and I'm sure I was more responsive with my attitude then.  But still, I couldn't verbalize how frustrating I thought this retraining was.  I know I wasn't being knuckled under, but I couldn't help but feel like that.

Why is that?  Well, I have to go back to the times (I think I talked about this here in the past) I was in filing second shift and had the run of the place to myself in the evening.  I literally and figuratively had no one looking over my shoulder, and that was freedom and bliss.  And it didn't matter if I made a mistake, which I sure I make every time I work by myself.  But I didn't care, because I felt like I was my own boss.  And despite how, um, appropriate this re-training might be, I do not feel like I am my own boss.  And I have realized that I really, really don't like feeling anything even close to that.

Maybe I'll manage a smile tomorrow.  Well, through my mask, but you know what I mean.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

Presenting the first Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey since March 18:

#0: United FC (Uh ... Last Time: 0).  I'm not sure how this MLS Is Back Tournament is supposed to count toward the regular season standings.  It is said that the Games in the Group Round (each side has three ... well, besides FC Dallas and Nashville SC, both of which pulled out of this tournament because they suffered a slew of positive COVID-19 cases within its travelling group) are a part of the regular season, but so far, I can't see the regular season standings on MLS.com, although I can see the standings just within this tourney, which is all being played in Orlando.

If that's the case, I want to say that the Loons are the only undefeated team in Major League Soccer by virtue of its thrilling come-from-behind victory over Sporting Kansas City Sunday night.  Apparently (I say apparently because I was on a Zoom meeting during the match; I had the radio on very low so I could sort-of hear the Match while being engaged with the Zoom.  My speaker and microphone are both busted, so I could have just put the radio on full blast, and since they won in astonishing fashion, I should have.) these guys were shit for the first hour of the Game, then they turned it on.  It helped that Tim Melia, the Goalkeeper for SKC, made a stupid challenge just outside of his box and drew a Red Card in the 74th Minute.  MNUFC finally was able to finally get the ball past the net ... in Stoppage Time!  First, Khiry Shelton, who scored Kansas City's Goal in the First Half, ricocheted a Jan Gregus Free Kick past Melia (SKC replacement Goalkeep Richard Sanchez) to tie the Game up in the 92nd Minute.  Then, in the 97th and final Minute of the Match, Romain Metanire sent a cross that was saved by Raheem Edwards and bounced right to an unmarked Kevin Molino who bounced his shot shortside past Melia Sanchez and into the back of the net.

Sure, United FC could have pounced on KC after the Red Card and not waited 18 Minutes.  Heck, they should have pounced on them from the First Minute.  But with no Ike Opara (staying away from Orlando for the tournament), no Ozzie Alonso (bad hamstring), and no Luis Amarilla (suffered a bad abductor during warm-ups and was a late scratch), they were able to snatch a win with a pair of Injury Time Goals.  That's a grind-it-out type win, and it shows that these people can win ugly.  I have no qualms about that!

The Loons face Real Salt Lake Friday night.

Today Is Going To Be A Very Important Day

There are so many things going on today:

• Well, it's Tax Day.  I think because of the three-month delay -- and the coronavirus, of course -- this deadline could catch a lot of people by surprise.  Luckily for me, I sent my returns in a week-and-a-half ago.
• Have a phone call with my psychiatrist after work.  What I've done the past couple sessions is leave work early, grab something from the local grocery store, drive to the park and eat a sandwich while speaking to him underneath a gazebo.  It's great because the past two times I was there, there was no one.  However, the reception was so execrable the last time (I want to blame the high wind) that I could not hear him half the time.  Made him repeat himself for the past 30 Minutes.  Hope that doesn't happen this afternoon.
• I have a Zoom meeting in the evening from the alumni association.  It's supposed to be about training to be a volunteer for events, even though I have volunteered for events for years now, so wouldn't this be re-training?  And this session comes in the backdrop of a rebellion that I'm a part of where we're actively undermining the current administration in the AA.  I have no idea if they're going to take potshots at us, and I'm not completely sure we're not going to heckle them as they give their presentation.  Shoot, I'm not sure if we'll be able to speak during the Zoom.  At any rate, under The New Rules, this is what we have to do in order to volunteer to organize events.
• Meanwhile, I need to send a protest letter to the president of my alma mater in regards to the moves made by the alumni association.  Moreover, I still need to speak with my contact in the AA because of another training session for a different event that I thought was coming up.  I have heard that there in fact was one last week.  If so, why was not told about that?  Is it because I am a part of this rebellion, or did she just screw this up?
• I should get around to telling the membership through e-mail about my friend who's dealing with COVID-19.  Announced it on Facebook and there has been a huge outpouring of support, but not everyone is on Facebook, so I think it's important to let people know just in case they haven't yet.  (I should also talk about my friend in this protest letter to the university president.  The letter is supposed to talk about why I am against this new organizational chart.  It's been hard for me to put into my own words why I don't like it, but it almost seems like karma that my friend's plight happened just while us other rebels were having a Zoom Sunday night.  I now can tell the president how a complete abandoning of current local leadership would prevent communication of a story that would be important to an alumni club.)
• I ordered some things through Amazon; have opted to get them delivered to a grocery store close by.  The order was three items but they are split into two deliveries, one item of which  came yesterday/Tuesday and the other two that's supposed to come today/Wednesday.  But I'll get them tomorrow/Thursday because I'm talking to my therapist.
• I'm supposed to start a diary today because I agreed to do a survey.  I have a video I need to see before I start penning this diary.  I need to keep this up for 15 days, and then if I complete all of it correctly ... I'll be entered to win a gift card.  Doesn't seem worth it now, does it?
• Oh, and Peacock, the streaming service launched by NBC, has launched ... just now.  I was wrong about there being just a free trial period; some "parts" of Peacock (or "peacock," I don't know) are free, period.  I'll sign up ... maybe after the Zoom meeting.

Yeah, I'm busy.  I look at this list and I think I need to get in a nap there somewhere, and if this means I don't send out letters, fine.  Uffda.

National Fry Day? What National Fry Day?

Late Sunday night I saw online that yesterday/Monday was National Fry Day.  Didn't think I was going to spend money on a Monday, but for National Fry Day, fuck yeah I was going to spend money on fries!

After reading an article on which fast food restaurants were offering which deals, I narrowed my choices down to two.  First, I would go to Kentucky Fried Chicken, where they have recently changed their fries to this new "Secret Recipe" (they are now spicing up their fries with those "13 herbs and spices"), and they're offering them for 30 cents with a separate purchase.  If that doesn't work -- hey, maybe franchisees aren't aware that it's National Fry Day -- I would go to the only Checkers I know in the state of Minnesota and buy one of their fries for a buck.

Went to KFC first -- drive-thrus for both, by the way.  "Hey, are you selling fries today for 30 cents with purchase?" I asked.  "No sir," the guy on the other end replied.  "OK, sorry to bother you," I said while leaving.

So I drive sort-of across town to Checkers and pull up.  The speaker at this drive-thru absolutely sucks.  Either the person helping me couldn't hear me or she's, uh, challenged.  Maybe both.  I eventually got around to asking, "Are you selling your fries for a buck today?"  And I think she needed to ask someone before she told me, "No."

So is it National Fry Day or is it not National Fry Day?

My Plan C was to just go home after that.  But I bought a Coke before I went to these places in anticipation of drinking it to wash down the fries, and I eventually caved and went to Taco Bell to buy their new (and messy) Grilled Cheese Burrito.  Tasted good, especially paired with my Coke.  But it was not the fries I was planning to eat.

The COVID-19 Noose Has Just Gotten Tighter

When the coronavirus outbreak ravaged northern Italy, I read a story about it online where someone noted that at its beginning, you knew someone who knew someone who was sick, and by the time the spike in cases was over, everyone knew someone who died from it.

I have been thinking about that oncoming dread as soon as the novel coronavirus hit these shores.  This country by no means has done jack shit in controlling this epidemic, but even if it had, I would be worried about how close it would get to me, because unlike, say, the 1918 flu or SARS, it seemed clear early on that this was a different beast that would have its way with much of American society no matter how careful we were.

Beyond obeying science and being careful (wearing a mask, distancing from others as much as possible, washing your hands, etc.), COVID-19 has, thank Buddha and God, truly been something that is beyond my reach, even though I clearly am not "reaching" for it.  I mean, I have felt as though the virus is literally in the air, just hanging there, and that paranoid fear has been borne out, but I have yet to be personally touched by its evil fingers.  And, so far, I know of people getting the virus and the disease second hand -- I have a friend whose father has it; another friend had a subcontractor who died from it; Facebook buddies had relatives or friends who are either fighting it or have succumbed to it.

Well, tonight brought the bad but inevitable news: I know someone in my life who got it.  It's my friend through the alumni club.  I was cycling through my e-mail while on an alumni club-related Zoom (my microphone and webcam don't work, so I was able to hear them while they couldn't hear or see me, so I could listen to the United come-from-behind victory and look through my e-mails!) when I came upon a reply to a mass e-mail I sent to all my former members of the now-killed off alumni club.  He's my buddy from the club, one of the most loyal alumni we have, and a guy who has been to most of my game-watching parties since the beginning.  I love the guy; he always was cheerful and patient, and he always a good word for me.  And at the end of every game, win or lose, we would hug.  He has been a very active member too, doing the events beyond the game-watching parties.  He is what I and the ex-club needed.

Well, he was able to e-mail me.  He just got out of the hospital this week after a month-long stay.  He was in the ICU, and for a while he was put on a ventilator.  And the goddamn COVID-19 isn't done with him yet.  He is suffering a series of maladies, each of them terrifying alone, but taken together, this is one of those horror stories you hear about people who were able to leave the hospital but are still dealing with the after-effects of the virus.

And now I'm scared.  Now this fucking virus is touching me -- maybe only flicking the bottoms of my ears, like a bully in junior high, but it's touching me.  I also liken the coronavirus to a noose, and that goddamn noose has just gotten tighter around me.

I don't have it, at least not yet, and I already know I want no fucking part of this.

Nightmare

I was covering a minor league baseball Game, maybe the St. Paul Saints.  (Maybe this means I should get back into sports?)

At the end of the Game, I had to do something; something like look at papers or transmit something electronically, or something.  But I couldn't do it because some guy was in the way and needed the space to do his thing first.  So either I couldn't get to these papers or I had these papers and I had to leave them there until this dude got done.

So I waited.  Checked in a couple times, and nope, that guy ain't done.  Finally was, and so I went to, like, the clubhouse or the media room or something ... and the papers were gone.  I ask a couple guys back there what the hell happened to those papers.  And then a dog appears; they say that the dog ate the papers.

And then I woke up.

I think this means I have suppressed grievances somewhere.

2018 Amended Tax Return Form Sent Thursday; Regret To My Grave

Just want to note that I sent above form after work (second shift) Thursday night.  I intend to get $441 back because I didn't realize the state of Minnesota offers standard deductions.  Hopefully the state won't reject me because of some bullshit excuse like, "Your error doesn't qualify you for a refund," or something like that.

Just had this epiphany: I know that I have never taken a deduction through the state.  That means that I have been giving the state of Minnesota money every year around tax time ever since I began paying taxes ... so, I have been giving the state money I will never get back for about two decades.

I think I'll keep that a secret to my family and friends to my grave.

And Now For Something More Awkward

So, beyond the shitty phone call. ...

Just finished the last of two nights of second shift in filing.  It wasn't bad.  The back half of my night, from about 5:30 on, flies by, but that's because I'm so busy doing work by myself.  But that "by myself" part is key: I absolutely love my nights there.  I think I still might underestimate how much I like a work environment in which no one is literally or figuratively in my space.

Still, things aren't perfect.  In fact, there were a few times where I just bleepin' didn't know what I was supposed to do.  I had to text my supervisor, who technically was off work but invited me to ask her any questions if I got stuck.  God bless her.

But another thing went awry last/Thursday evening that still grinds my gears.  In short, there was something that told me I needed to send a form over to a different department.  But I was wrong; I needed to fax this form instead.  This was brought to my attention by my supervisor this (Friday) afternoon, but yesterday (Thursday) someone from The Third Department I Work In brought it to my attention ... even though this mix-up has nothing to do with her or the department she is in.

She brought it to my attention because someone from that department literally walked into filing.  In fact, I remember seeing this person from the other department look at me and slow down as if she wanted to tell me something ... but decided against it and brought it to this other person instead.  Why?  She knows that this person has nothing to do with this form and how it was supposed to be handled.  Moreover, she had to go through the filing department in order to reach This Third Department, and she saw me working in fiing.  Why couldn't she have asked me?  Is it because she thought I was the one who made the mistake and was so disgusted by me that she wants nothing to do with me?  If that's the case -- well, shit, we've got a problem then, don't we?

At any rate -- AWKWARD!!!

My Entertainment And Their Damn Summer Vacations

Yeah, I guess I should have blog posted this two weeks ago.  Tonight/Friday is the last day in the last two weeks I will be without my full allotment of entertainment.  To wit:

• I listen to The Matt McNeil Show on AM 950, the local -- one of the only local -- progressive talk radio stations in the country.  I like this guy; I agree with most of what he says.  Anyway, he was on vacation for two weeks, and then I heard him live last Thursday, and then on Monday it was a re-run ... I don't understand his schedule, but I assume he took two-ish weeks off.  And I think he's back by now.
• Stephanie Miller was gone for one week two weeks ago!  Fortunately, her "mooks" filled in for her that week, so I was still up on the latest political news and liberal interpretation that week.  Single members of that team took staggered week-long vacations after that, so even though Mama has been down a member last and this week, she and the show were still live.  Thank Buddha!
• Now, late night.  Colbert, Fallon, Corden and Meyers have taken two weeks (last and this week) off.  I appreciate the free time I don't spend watching them on TV, but it nonetheless has created a hole in my life.  Now, Kimmel has filled it ... sorta.  Jimmy Kimmel's schedule has always been different from the other late-night guests.  The show took two weeks off, but it was the weeks two weeks ago and last week.  Moreover, Kimmel himself is taking the entire summer off.  (What, does he want to spend more time with the family he's been quarantining with the past four months?)  There have been new episodes on his show this week, thank God.  But it's with guest hosts -- Anthony Anderson Monday and Tuesday, Billy Eichner Wednesday and Thursday.  The show continues with guest hosts, but new eps, presumably for the rest of the summer.

It's inevitable that these vacations come around Independence Day, and it happens every year.  But this entertainment desert still sucks, and so I'm glad all's back to normal (pretty much) Monday.

I Confess -- I Made It Awkward

I am finally going to do something about the empty helium tank we still have.  I bought it for the alumni club about, ah, a decade ago to blow up balloons for parties.  When we didn't need that anymore, Mother used it to blow up balloons for my niece.  And when it finally ran out, I thought I could just give it to Wal-Mart for them to recycle, like I did with the previous helium tank.  They wouldn't take it.  It's been sitting in my old bedroom for, like, two years now.

Have no idea if we can recycle it, but maybe I can take it to the county hazardous waste center?  So I called them and got a woman with a robotic, faintly polite voice.  She didn't say, "How can I help you?" which struck me as odd.  So I told her about the tank, and she asked me, "Which city?"  But I was listening to 5-3-4 on The Common Man on The Fan when she said that, so I asked her, "I'm sorry, did you ask me which state?"

"Which city," she replied.  I'm sure she was thinking, "Dumbass."

So I told her which city, which is weird since I thought the number was for my city's hazardous waste center.  Then she told me I could dump it there, or some other places ... and she didn't name any of those places, she just said that there were other places.  And I figured she was passive-aggressively trying to end the call.  OK, sorry I wasn't paying attention, I made it awkward, thank you, and I hope I hung up on her before she hung up on me.

Maybe that bitch should be fired, but maybe I should've paid attention, who knows?

Expenses Without Receipt

Starting from July 8:

• The first EWR is Independence Day, aka Saturday the 4th.  I have been in the middle of a State Fair food craving.  I got the craving when other people apparently got a craving and started a Facebook group in order to track pop-up places that have resorted to serve food on parking lots.  I want to patronize the vendors that actually are at the Minnesota State Fair; I want to help them out since the Fair is cancelled, plus I want to have some semblance of the feel of the Fair by eating its food.  (This summer I have been to a couple places that I know are not at the Fair, and I ate them anyway, and I sort of regret that.  Also, the Facebook group should limit its posts only to actual Fair vendors, but many of the posts feature pop-ups that I don't think are at the Fair, just serve "Fair food.")  One of those actual places (I hope) is the Salted Nut Roll place.  I ate its peanut roll, and it was so good that I bought one each of its cashew and pecan rolls, too.  Mother took a few bites of the cashew, and she loved it so much that the next time Salted Nut Roll is around (they were only at this site, in front of the Roseville VFW, on the 4th of July), buy four or five of each.  OK.  I bought one of each, and with tip I spent: $20.
• And I washed it down with a jumbo lemonade at the Cheese-On-A-Stick And Fresh Lemonade pop-up several yards away, also at the VFW.  It was hot that afternoon, so the lemonade went down good.  Cost: $6.
• We then go all the way back to Sunday, June 28, where I went out to a neighborhood block party in the name of George Floyd in south Minneapolis that was partly organized by *****a, one of my stripper girlfriends.  I bought a couple of items, and I also contributed to the neighborhood economy by eating jerk chicken, rice, muffin and water from this place called B&G Kitchen.  Good, although it is weird to eat outdoors.  Total: $14.
• I then drive to Sandcastle, where I saw some ass.  I also went there to eat high-end, uh, beach food; figured I could go there because this neighborhood fest was relatively close to Sandcastle (even though the complexion of the people at both places leads me to believe those two places are worlds apart from each other, if you know what I mean).  Their coney dog is really good.  Was also able to purchase a Crispin and drink it at the beach.  It was really hot out on this day, so I also bought a Coke for the road.  Sandcastle tacked on a convenience fee because I bought so much.  And with tip, the total was: $16.25.
• Saturday the 27th -- a spot I know serves at the Fair is this Scotch Egg place, and they popped up at Maplewood Mall, where they'll be some weekends over the summer.  The Flowering Onion shop is also there, and I should go back to get that, as well as the iced coffee at the Scotch Egg place.  But I purchased the Scotch Eggs, and that cost me: $8.
• On Friday the 26th I got my shoes shined from Lisa.  With tip: $15.
• Thursday, June 25th ... North Star Donuts is a food truck that was at Blue Sun Soda Shop.  This is one of the places that is advertised on the Facebook group but is not at the State Fair.  I haven't been to Blue Sun in some time, however, and Blue Sun is close to home, and this was a separate Facebook invitation, plus a dozen mini-donuts tasted really good ... yeah.  Their sandwich board showed it also offered a lemonade slushie, and I got that to wash down the donuts.  They gave me a paper straw, and paper straws are an abomination to Man.  With tip I spent: $14.
• Wednesday the 24th: I was on a food run after work on this day.  Went to Cheese-On-A-Stick And Fresh Lemonade at the Roseville VFW, where, on three trips encompassing two changes of mind, I bought everything at that place except their Jalapeno Cheese-On-A-Stick.  Used my credit card for the food, but I tipped in cash (hmmm ... didn't see a tip jar when I went there to buy lemonade on July 4th ...), so I spent: $3.
• I then went up Hwy. 10 to Loulou Sweet & Savory, a rolled ice cream place that parked itself in front of, hmmm, a liquor store.  They are also trying to nudge into the aura of "Fair Food," and that's mostly why I stopped there, even though there's no chance they are a vendor at the Fair.  I also used a credit card for the ice cream, which was good, but I also tipped in cash: $1.
• All the way back to Sunday, June 14 ... I went to ******a's to, once again, see if I can unlock her iPad.  It wouldn't completely reset.  This is getting frustrating.  Or, it might be a ploy from her to offer massages ... which are nice.  In fact, even though I am supposed to pay her $40 for 25 Minutes, she gave me one of the twenties back.  Fair enough.  More than fair: $20.
• After ******a I went to the George Floyd Square just to hang.  Around the memorial there are places that are offering food.  They don't charge, but they are asking for donations -- "whatever you can spare."  I had lunch being served by this organization called Another Chance Outreach, and a cold brew Wildflyer Coffee.  Total "donations": $5.
• To Saturday the 13th, where I finally got my car washed for the first time in months (well, besides the time the outside was washed when I went to the dealership to get my oil changed and tires rotated) at Central.  I should talk about this, but my car shield (the thing I open up and hang on the inside of my car so my car doesn't get so fucking hot) is disintegrating, and it's leaving bits of its insides -- I'm guessing asbestos -- all around the inside of my car.  That was all over the interior of my car, so I could breathe a huge sigh of relief once it was totally clean.  Charged the wash, but I used money for the tip: $5.
• Went to the Floyd Memorial after the car wash.  Got a lemonade from Wildflyer Coffee.  Gave a "donation" of: $2.
• Went to Floyd Plaza Sunday the 7th as well.  As I was going into the plaza, I saw a cart for Misfit Coffee which was technically three blocks out of the area.  Gave something at the tip jar for my cold brew.  Then, at the plaza, I lined up to get tacos at this tent outside the Speedway.  Didn't get the name of the organization serving the tacos, but it was good.  "Donated" there.  Total money: $4.
• It was hot, and I wanted to treat myself, so I waited at the drive-thru for DQ to buy and eat a hot fudge sundae.  And this was the first time in a long time when I did not use my credit card for fast food: $3.52.
• To Friday, June 5, where I finally got my hair cut ... outside, at a park, with a teenage couple hanging out at a nearby table nearly the whole 90 Minutes it fucking took ****e* to cut my hair.  (A few other people were walking by and saw us, too.  And I complained about all of this in a previous blog post.)  But she volunteered to cut my hair, and I was afraid of getting my hair cut inside, so I gave her $60 which, she initially insisted, was too much, but I still appreciate what she did for me.  Again, for the hair cut, I gave ****e*: $60.
• After that I fucked ****e: $120.

Good through July 8.

Oh Yeah -- I Haven't Done The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey In A Long Time!

With Minnesota United resuming play as part of the MLS Is Back Tournament this weekend -- assuming the team and the league don't suffer massive hits to the roster due to COVID-19, it would make sense to bring back The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey.

I counted the time since I did the last WMNSS: 17 Weeks.  Once I get back to doing the survey next Wednesday, it'll be 17 Weeks since I last did it.  Considering that this type of blog post I have done since I began Wailing And Failing -- wow.

I'll be honest in saying I didn't really miss it.  Sometimes the WMNSS is a yoke that tests my patience in routinely doing the same thing at the same day of the week.  However, that routine also gave me and this blog some structure; I mean, at least I had something to talk about once a week.  Plus, the expectation that I will have the same topic to talk about weekly builds consistency for an audience that will look forward to reading my blog.  Now, I don't think that's happened, so this is still a theory, but the theory is sound enough that I'll keep doing it.

So, beginning next Wednesday, I resume the survey.  I just hope I don't forget to do it.

OK, Now I'm Scared Of How My Body Is Feeling

I am currently ailing from two things right now.

The longer of the ailments is this ache on my left hip.  I think it's a recurrence of my maligned back, which I got when I went on that long roadtrip to see the total eclipse a couple years ago.  A hard sleep in a bad posture probably kinked out my left hip.  I feel it sometimes when I sit in the wrong way, or lay down in the wrong way, but I feel it, and although it's not an unbearable pain, I feel it, and it doesn't go away.  I should go back to those stretching exercises I was taught a couple years ago.  I've been doing them very sporadically since; maybe more diligence will treat it and make it go away.  Yeah, I'll do it ... later.

The other ailment came on strong Sunday, after I took a shit: Constipation.  Well, that plus this ... feeling I get from my perineum, the area between my dick and my asshole, aka my "fumunda" place.  The feeling is like I'm straining to poop and I can't, and I strained a muscle out of place.  OK -- so, a hernia.  It feels as though I'm constipated and have a hernia.  For all I know those are redundant symptoms, but I don't remember ever feeling like this before.

Worst yet, I have never felt this combination of ailments (the left hip ache and constipation) before.  It scares me that it could be COVID-19, even though neither is a symptom of the disease.  It scares me because, I confess, I went out to a bar in St. Paul to watch a National Women's Soccer League match.  There couldn't have been more than, like, six people in there at once, and I don't think I was within six feet of anyone for more than a two Minutes.  But I was in an indoor setting, the ventilation wasn't all that great, and I was there for almost 2 1/2 Hours.  Could I have caught the virus then, and are these feelings I'm feeling a result of it?

Box-Of-Rocks Dumb

There was a stripper party going on last night.  Didn't feel like going.  Parties scare me too much these days.  I will make an exception under the right circumstances, but this one did not have such circumstances.  And then I was texting back-and-forth with the host, and right now, if I don't ever go to one of her parties again, I'd be totally fine with it.

I talked about her once here on Wailing And Failing.  She was hosting a party at a townhome that wasn't hers, even though it belongs to a stripper working that party.  She furtively tried to masturbate me through my pants when I got my first lapper from her, which was good.  Otherwise, she was ... strange.  Overbearing; she kept asking me if I liked her party.  Although her eyes are light blue, they always seem glassy, like it's a symptom that she's not all there, you know?  And sometimes she does not understand the simple questions I'm texting, and she misunderstands in the most annoying, dumbest way.  Once I explicitly asked her what time one of her parties ended.  She said 2.  "So a. m.?" I asked?  "No, 2 p.m." she replied.  I told her I couldn't come to her party because it's in the afternoon.  "No, it starts at 2 and ends at 9."  If you only would have looked at my text. ...

She did it again in the run-up to her party last night, and this time it was sort of the final straw for me.  I told her I would not go to her party because I was still skittish over attending parties with lots of people.  She kept trying to reassure me -- well, she first said that this party has nothing to do with a shooting that took place in the parking lot of the strip club she works at, like I fucking talked about that shit at all -- by saying stuff like, "17 Minutes is not far," and "I'm only letting a few in the house at a time," which made me think that the rest of would just have to wait in their cars or something, which is absurd.

I wasn't going.  That's the bottom line.  So I just shut down and didn't reply to her after she continued to try and convince me her party was safe.  So yesterday, the morning of the party, I texted: "I'm not coming today.  But thank you for the offer."  To which she replied, "I already know."  Bitch, you've been trying to convince me to come to your party for days now!  How do you mean you know when you wouldn't take my reasons not to go for an answer?!  And I got so triggered I had to get in the last word; last night, well after the party would have been over, I sent her an eyeroll emoji.  Because I'm over it, and her.

Right now I just don't have any patience for strippers who are dumb.  And she is box-of-rocks dumb, as stupid as they come, and it's not really close.  I mean, I have stopped talking to strippers who rip me off, and those that manipulate me in order to shake me down for more money.  But I consider them to be petty and juvenile and craven, people who know what they're doing and will go pretty far in order to get what they want from me.  This woman ... like I said, she's as dumb as a box of rocks.  I am just floored that she somehow can function in society, let alone host a party.

Maybe I'll give her a chance when I'm desperate.  But right now, I don't fuckin' need her.

At Some Point She Has To Notice

For the longest time I've been pushing my breaks, especially the morning one, when I get my coffee and use the bathroom, sometimes to poop.  No one is really looking at me, so I come and go as I please, and I usually get back to my seat a Minute after my 15.  Maybe two.  Sometimes three.

Yesterday, during my afternoon break, it was a bit more.  Lately I have been eating the food Father gives me for afternoon break.  I had been going out to my car to take a nap, but I had to be real with myself -- it has been a long time since I've taken a nap in the afternoon, and if I am able to pass out for lunch, I don't feel the need to go back into my car to take another nap.  Besides, I need to eat this food, and I'm busy getting coffee and pooping in the morning, so afternoon break it is.

The food I get is usually a banana.  Yesterday I tried to pace myself a bit, for I knew that I had to go into the lab after break was over.  (Not a whole lot of forms, we usually get done around 2, and break is the perfect time to prepare to go in there.)  It behooved me to finish everything within 15 Minutes because, even though I usually can come and go as I please, I think people would notice if I don't get into the lab in time.  One further complication: My supervisor was working yesterday.  She wasn't supposed to, but my boss who was supposed to come in on this Monday left early.  (COVID-19?)  And it is her desk I pass by on my way back from the bathroom for morning break.  She's a supervisor.  She also may be tracking how long I take to get back from break.  So if she is, I might be on the slacker list already.

So I get done with the banana.  But then I have to wipe down the table.  Then I have to use the bathroom, and I usually go to the one closest to the lab coats I need to wear inside the lab.  And then I ... shoot, I just spaced out.  I wash my hands, grab my coat then realize, oh crap, I'm seven Minutes late!

Did my supe see me?  She's not at her desk, so maybe she didn't notice.  But once I got into the lab, I saw her, training the new person on how to do lab work.  Great.  If she had her eagle eyes on me -- or, come to think of it, if she looked at the paper log and see that I was totally honest and put in the time I entered the lab at seven Minutes after I should have (why didn't I just lie?) -- this would, logically, be the breaking point whereby I cannot extend my breaks any further than I already have.  So, I fear that a warning, or at least a note from my boss, is coming in very short order.

I feel the need to be a good employee and come back from breaks super early, starting today.  But I don't think I can.  I mean, I might have to poop, and you can't rush pooping.

I'm so in trouble.

Hottest Babe In The Hooters Calendar: June

A very, very good month for talent.  Of the ten babes featured, there are six that stand out.

I can lump third through sixth together because they are somewhat interchangeable, though all are delectable:

• Ally, out of Pembroke Pines, Fla., has beautiful skin, long black hair, and a Mona Lisa smile, and a light orange two-piece swimsuit.  She's posed during low tide on the shore of a beach, and there's something ... urgggggh, aruosing in the way she arches her back.  The only problem I have is that she is posed in side profile and her left arm is front of most of her body.
• Faith, from Pasadena, Tex., has the most sheepish and thus cutest smile I've seen on a Hooters girl.  And she's holding her neck with her right hand as if she's saying, "Yeah, sorry to bother you, but ..."  She has a tight stomach, too.  The only thing off-putting about her is her bikini: Her top is purple, but she's wearing a white flower print bottom.  It doesn't match.  You would think you would want your bikini to match, wouldn't you?  Maybe that's why she's got such a bashful grin and is holding her neck: She's embarrassed by what she's wearing.
• New York City's Victoria is in orange -- that cropped shirt top that ties in the middle of the cleavage, and a bikini bottom that exposes her smokin' waist.  And I think I can see that her left side boob is lighter in shade than the rest of her body.  Ooh, she tans, and she's showing me a part of her body she doesn't normally show!  Con: While interesting to pose her in the threshold of the door, her arms are cut off, plus her long black hair cascades down the front of her left boob (the one with the pale skin), and I find that distracting.
• Tucson's Jennifer is posed on her side, also on the edge of water, and it's a striking pose.  She's gorgeous too: Almost white hair, porcelain skin, and a blue two-piece.  Unfortunately, her right hand (she's posed on her left side) covers her stomach.  Also, unlike, Ally, Jennifer's hair is not wet.  It's as if she carefully laid herself down so as not to ruin her hair.  Kind of weird.

There are two hot women whose pictures are just about flawless.  In second place is Halie, out of Houma, La.  Full frontal shot (a prerequisite), long brown hair, a two-piece bikini in shocking deep blue, and beautiful brown skin.

But I got to give the award to The Main Girl, Heather, hailing from Atlantic City.  Sporting long blonde hair and a light blue (maybe eggplant) two-piece bikini, she's kneeling on sand near a dune (or she's posed on a staged set with sand, fence and a sign saying "Keep Off The Dunes").  Like Halie, Heather has a hot stomach and is smiling.  I just like Heather's smile more.  So, congratulations to Heather!

And I will enjoy masturbating to these group of women when I have time.

Showing Your Ass On The Beach Is Nudity. There, I Said It.

So last Sunday I went to a lake in Minneapolis, ostensibly to try the walk-up restaurant which is much fancier than one would expect food from a shack next to a lake.  But I sat down close to the beach and noticed all these (non-physically distant, unmasked) people lazing about and so I might as well eat this good hot food then and there and people-watch.

Babes in places.  Fat women in places.  Fat kids in places, too.  (One woman I saw taking her shirt off to show off her two-piece, and the stripping was so good that I remembered it ... and I rubbed one off to that image this morning a little after I woke up.)  And then, near the end of my stay, I saw these three young women trundling by.  Average-looking, but they aroused me.  And as they passed me, I notice their asses, of course ... and I see a whole lot more ass than I expected to see in a public beach anywhere in ... well, not just in Minnesota but any place that's not Haulover Beach or Hedonism.  Now, it wasn't full ass.  It wasn't a thong like I see on strippers.  But the bottom covered, like, half the ass.  (I think they call it the Brazilian cut.)  That is still a lot, and there was a chance that my mouth was agape once I saw these legal age but still-young young women baring booty like that.

And now I was obsessed to see if any other women were showing ass like this.  Not at this beach, but with so many people posting summer beach videos, especially on this holiday, I've had so many opportunities to look surreptitiously and without anybody catching me.  Last night, for example, I was on Twitter and saw a non-socially distant pool party in Michigan -- dumb motherfuckers just want to get this virus, for fuck's sake -- and I was hunting for ass.  And I saw at least one women in a swimsuit that showed her somewhat-flabby butt.  There's another Facebook friend that was showing half-ass, and I gave her an eggplant-and-sweat emoji combination.  With these videos shoved in my face, I just can't help it!

And why can't I help it?  Because showing any ass in public is nudity.  It's not like an arm, or even thigh, or even cleavage.  That's a part of the body that should not be shown in public ... unless you want to strut and be provocative and arouse average men like me, in which case you damn well better know what you're doing when you flash ass -- and if you don't, you should have known.

I'm not being regressive, or a Republican.  I am stating the fact that societal norms are breaking down and thinking mooning people is no big deal is not a good answer.  And again, I'm not saying you can't show ass.  I love a women's ass.  Just know that if you do show ass, don't be surprised if I get the urge to drop my pants and wipe my dick over it, or try to poke you in one of your holes with my hard-on.

Only fair.  Only right.

Dining In A Restaurant -- Yes Or No?

So I told you about my half-day sleep.  I was energized to go do something, but I really wanted to do, and forgive me, is to go out to Brit's Pub and see some EPL.

All week I had gone back and forth on it.  Dining in restaurants, while allowed at limited capacity, contains the indoor condition that favors transmission of the virus.  Also, needing to stay the two hours to take in the soccer Matches invites the time element needed to pick up the coronavirus.  I could counterbalance that with so mitigative measures that might also be there.  Indoor dining is at, what, 50% capacity?  Also, I only go out to Brit's or The Local for EPL Games when there are several of them that kick off at the same time, and usually only when the teams playing are not any of the big ones, because there are local supporters clubs that will go and watch their sides play.  The two Games this morning were Manchester United-Bournemouth and Leicester City-Crystal Palace.  OK, so ManU is a huge club with a big fanbase, including in the Twin Cities.  But, they usually watch their Games at The Local.  But, the The Local is closed, so it's likely that they would go to Brit's.

OK, I might have just undercut the reasons why I would go.

Anyway, I really wanted to go.  And since I got up in time, I would have enough time to get to downtown in time for the kickoff, which was at 9 a.m.  All I would need was for my parents to leave; they are still renovating this real estate property that I assume they are going to sell.  I would not feel comfortable leaving before them; they would ask where am I going, plus I promised Father I would mow the lawn, and of course there is the virus thing.  But if they left early enough, I wouldn't have to worry about those questions.  I'd leave after a certain time, enjoy soccer (while wearing my mask, of course ... well, I would have to take it off to drink and eat, but you know), then come back and mow the lawn well before they came back.

Did they leave in time?  No, not really.  In fact, it was the worst time to leave -- with just enough time for me to think that I could get there in time if I drove really, really fast.  They left a bit past 8:30.  Now, 25 Minutes gives me time, but I would be driving down the same highway they would in order to get to this property, so I would had to have given them five more Minutes' head start, and 20 Minutes to get to downtown, park and walk into an entirely new indoor dining situation was just too much.  I hate it; looking at the schedule there is no other instance to this morning's until Final Sunday/Decision Day, which is July 26.  (There are Games kicking off at noontime at the same time [and once at 2:15] during the workweek, and next Saturday there are Matches at 6:30, and Brit's Pub does not open that early.)  But there were just too many downsides to going late, most importantly breaking my OCD rule that I need to be at a soccer Match in time to see the kickoff.

Why did instead was another thing that I pseudo-promised My Father I'd do: Clean my bedroom.  I actually dusted the top of my desk and blinds, believe it or not; they needed dusting, I can tell you that.  Oh, and I also scrubbed down the tub and shower.  And I did go out; after hearing Manchester United crush Bournemouth on talkSPORT Live/SiriusXM FC, I went to buy some State Fair food in Roseville.  Went back home to mow the lawn thinking I'd have time to sneak out for, like, ice cream or something cool before the 'Rents came home, but they got home around 2:15 or 2:30, as I was mowing the backyard.

---

With that being said, I probably (forgive me) going to watch a soccer Game out tomorrow.  There is a National Women's Soccer League Match between North Carolina and Chicago at 11:30 -- plenty of time for my folks to leave.  There is a place called the Black Hart in St. Paul, where the vandalism and looting in St. Paul happened.  They're open, and through a company-backed promotion on Twitter, mention you're there to watch the NWSL Game, mention the company, and you BOGO.  I think I will do that.

But if it's too crowded, I'll leave.  And if I don't get this BOGO, I might leave.  And if realize that it might not be totally safe to be in there regardless, I might not even go.  Yeah, I'm itching for things to go back to normal, and caution fatigue is getting to me, too.

---

Oh, Happy 4th of July, everyone.  Here is The Best Goddamn Song Ever (as I say this right now):

Restorative Rest

I am going to make this blog post entirely (or nearly entirely) positive and report that I slept for just about half a day, 12 hours, just now.  Fell asleep watching back-to-back episodes of The Dick Van Dyke Show (both colorized) featuring the late Carl Reiner.  Somehow I turned off the TV.  I thought I woke up once, maybe twice, but promptly fell asleep afterward.  Finally woke up with the muffled clattering of my parents outside.  Finally checked my watch after calling my sleep over: 7:44 a.m.

It has been ... you know, there was one time a long, long time ago when I slept for half a day.  I fell asleep Saturday morning and woke up just as my parents (including my Grandmother) were starting to eat dinner.  I think Baywatch was on.  There maybe, probably was one other time when I slept a dozen hours, but I know this was the last time I had slept for that long.

And now, I ... don't know what to do.  Lot of things I should do, very few I want to do.  Ish.

Toilet Bowl Cleaned, But Not From My Own Hands

The toilet bowl was getting a little grody, and I thought I would finally take some time this weekend to clean it.  But I really, really wanted toilet bowl cleaner, and we didn't have any, so I thought I would swing by Target to buy one ... after: Eating Blue Barn food from The Local (ate it in the parking lot), Visiting Grandmother (oh, shit, I didn't say goodbye to her -- dammit, I forgot!) at Lakewood, getting Glam Doll (but couldn't; they sold out), mailing my taxes, printing out the Minnesota state amended tax form for 2018 so I can re-do it and get some of my money back, and dropping off my cum towel at storage.  Did that all in about 4 1/2 Hours -- very long hours because it's so goddamn hot outside.

But I found the toilet bowl cleaner at ... Wal-Mart, which is where the FedEx was where I could print out that form.  And when I came back, at around 3:30, my parents were home renovating that home they own.  And I go to the bathroom and see the toilet bowl all sudsy.  Father apparently also saw it was getting a little grody, and he cleaned it himself.  With what, I don't know.

Don't want to return the cleaner because ... well, it's Wal-Mart, and the place made me feel oogy, and there were too many people not wearing masks and a group looked as though they wanted to pick a fight with people who were wearing masks and I think I picked up the coronavirus.  There, I said it.

Oh, and even though I don't have to clean the toilet now, it puts pressure on me to clean something else, like the bathtub.